Chains of Regret

by Margaret Pargeter

  Helen glared at him, wishing he would stop saying that with a patent boredom which indicated he had already lost interest.

  ‘I went to the kitchen and told her she could go!’

  ‘I’m sure she’ll forgive you?’ he murmured soothingly.

  ‘Forgive me?’ Helen gasped. ‘You can’t be serious?’

  ‘A housekeeper is very difficult to replace,’ he pointed out reasonably.

  ‘I don’t want to replace her!’ Helen all but shouted, her blue eyes fixed stormily on his impassive face.

  ‘Can’t you get that into your thick head? The whole lot will have to go in a few weeks, when I sell this place. Until then I’ll do the cooking myself!’

  ‘Heaven help me!’

  A faint red tinged his cheeks and she didn’t stop to wonder if his terse exclamation had anything to do with her cooking. ‘You may be wise to ask,’ she blazed, ‘because I’m not sure if anyone else will? I know I didn’t treat my father right, but that had nothing to do with you.’ She forgot her remorse over the way she had also treated Stein as she rushed on. ‘I won’t stand for being ordered about and cheated any longer. God knows how much you managed to steal from my father, but I won’t allow you to continue stealing from me!’

  ‘That’s enough!’ Stein spoke between his teeth as he lunged for her, looking so formidable that Helen was suddenly frightened. She tried to retreat, but he took hold of her shoulders and began shaking her. She could see the veins on the strong muscles of his neck standing out and his eyes momentarily held the blackness of unconcealed rage. ‘You’ll pay for every insulting word you’ve uttered!’ he snarled.

  ‘Let go of me, you swine!’ she gasped, hearing a seam of fragile material tearing under the abuse of his relentless hands. Irrationally, because it was the last thing she was thinking of, she screamed, ‘You can pay for a new dress!’

  ‘Getting money out of me for that might be the least of your worries,’ he rasped menacingly. ‘I’d like to break every beautiful bone in your body. Not before I’ve had you, of course!’

  ‘That’s one ambition you can forget about!’ she cried wildly, her eyes still defiant.

  Stein stopped shaking her but didn’t release her. He bent towards her, menace in the grey eyes. ‘I’ll have what you’ve given others. All the men at those mad parties you were so fond of, and in Paris—and God knows where else!’

  ‘You’re crazy!’ she moaned.

  ‘You will be, before I’m through with you!’ His mouth formed a cold sneer. ‘You’re not indifferent. I could easily make you want me until you were nearly out of your mind.’

  She heard the harsh intake of his breath as he dragged her closer, felt the pain of his vice-like grip on her shoulders. Then his arms slid around her in savage possession, while he forced her head back under the violence of his kiss, his lips hot and angry, thrusting her mouth open to a probing invasion she was helpless against. When she struggled his arms merely tightened and she was trapped between him and the desk. She could feel his powerful thighs pulsing against her with a desire he made no attempt to conceal.

  When he released her, her face was flooded with hot colour and she was trembling.

  ‘Are you through?’ she whispered, rubbing a hand over her bruised mouth.

  ‘For the moment,’ he nodded coldly but with a certain savagery in his eyes.

  ‘Don’t threaten me!’ she said hoarsely, trying to measure the distance between him and the door. There was a high flush over his cheekbones and his eyes were glittering fiercely. He seemed almost out of control, and her trembling increased. Every time he touched her she was having to fight harder with herself. She was desperately afraid that if he really tried, she might go up like straw in the wind, fanned by the flames of his physical desire. She needed love, she told herself frantically, not this kind of thing!

  Stein was watching her, staring down at her mouth, a glittering expression on his face, almost as though he was mentally plundering it again. ‘I’ll threaten you all I like,’ he muttered. ‘And I won’t just stop at threats. I have a large sexual appetite, Helen.’

  ‘You’re crazy!’ she choked, wondering how often she “had told him. ‘I’ll get Harold Dent to throw you out! I don’t want you here.’

  His eyes hardened as he said with a savage smile, ‘You can get alarmed when I don’t want you!’

  ‘I’ll go to the police!’ she cried, her face blazing.

  ‘Whenever you like,’ he laughed coldly. ‘I’d advise you to wait, though. What will you tell them? That I’m going to seduce you? You’ll have a stronger case if you wait until it happens.’

  Did he intend pouring mockery over her until she was knee deep in it? ‘I hate you!’ she snapped furiously.

  ‘You’ve never done a thing to help anyone but yourself. There’s a lot I have to tell Mr. Dent!’

  ‘I can’t bear to wait,’ he sneered. ‘The suspense is killing me.’

  ‘I hope something does!’ Her eyes were bright with anger. ‘I intend ringing Mr. Dent’s office tomorrow to ask when he’ll be back.’

  ‘He hasn’t been away,’ Stein snapped. ‘If you insist I’ll arrange for him to come here tomorrow afternoon.’

  Helen staggered, and might have fallen if she hadn’t been leaning against the desk. Her throat was so tight it hurt her. He was staring at her with icy hostility. If there had been one hint of remorse in his eyes she might have forgiven him. His only emotion appeared to be resentment that she had discovered what he was up to and refused to be a pawn in his game.

  She wanted to laugh triumphantly, but somehow she couldn’t. A moment ago she could happily have heard Harold Dent denouncing him from the rooftops. Now she couldn’t bear to think of it. It wasn’t Stein who was going crazy, it was herself!

  Determined to strengthen such a ridiculous weakening of her defences, she said stiffly. ‘Thank you. I don’t actually know if you own any shares in the company, but if it’s only a job…’

  ‘Shut up!’ he cut her off tersely.

  ‘Stein, please …!’

  Again he refused to listen. ‘I’d rather you went to bed, Helen, otherwise you might have even more to regret.’ His eyes bored into her, his teeth meeting with a snap. ‘I’d advise you not to say another word, not until you’ve seen your solicitor.’

  Upstairs, Helen flung herself on her bed, wishing she could stop shaking. She lay in the darkness trembling, appalled at what had happened. She knew some relief that she was to see Harold Dent at last, but any suggestion that Stein might be proved guilty of criminal offences terrified her. She liked to pretend she hated him and disliked the caresses he forced on her. She seemed. to have been fighting him from the moment they had met, but she had a haunted feeling that she didn’t really know what her antagonism was about.

  When Stein took her in his arms she wanted to cling to him and forget about everything but the demands of her body. She couldn’t believe he meant all the terrible things he said to her, yet she shuddered when she thought of the raw hunger she sometimes sensed in him.

  The dangerous way he lived, his hard arrogance and lack of conscience all repelled her. Yet there were times when, despite recognising the danger, she ached for him. Tonight mightn’t she easily have almost precipitated a crisis herself, by responding too passionately to his urgent caresses?

  Going to the bathroom, she quickly undressed and took a cool shower. Sick and miserable, she crawled into bed, too torn by unhappiness and worry to sleep.

  Grief over her father and her present problems overwhelmed her so that she passed most of the hours before dawn lying wide awake with tears streaming down her cheeks.

  She must have dozed for an hour after dawn and was startled to find, when she woke and glanced at the clock, it was after nine. A cup of cold tea stood by her bed. She ignored it as she rushed to take another shower. During her short sleep she must have had bad dreams, for her body was wet with perspiration.

  Dressing swiftly, she hurried downstairs. S
he wondered where Stein was and what he was doing. She wanted to know if he intended being around when Mr. Dent arrived. He wasn’t a coward, but he wasn’t altogether predictable.

  As she reached the bottom of the stairs he was coming out of the dining-room. Helen hadn’t expected to find him so soon, and she felt her face flush, then go pale. He was dressed for business and looked very dark and formidable as he paused and watched her walking hesitantly towards him.

  ‘You—you aren’t going to town this morning?’ she faltered, the angry words they had exchanged hanging like a pall between them.

  ‘I have to, I’m afraid,’ he said grimly. ‘I’ll see you later.’

  His face was drawn, he didn’t look as though he had slept much either. Hollowly she wondered if he intended coming back. Her doubts must have shown In her eyes, for he said enigmatically, ‘Don’t worry, I’m not about to flee the country, my dear, although you might come to wish I had.’

  ‘What can you expect me to think?’ she asked, white-faced and bitter. ‘After the funeral you told me Harold Dent was away. How do I know when you aren’t deceiving me?’

  ‘I thought you needed a few days to get over the shock of your father,’ he replied coolly.

  Uncertainly she met his inscrutable gaze. How could she tell what part concern for her played in his own interests? Stein appeared to possess a hard, fearless sincerity, yet the worst scoundrels often had honest faces.

  ‘Have you spoken to Harold Dent this morning?’ she asked quickly, flushing miserably.

  ‘Yes,’ Stein’s mouth twisted, ‘he’ll be here after lunch.’

  Helen was waiting when he arrived. He stayed an hour and when he left she could barely find the composure to say goodbye. The solicitor, never having felt so uncomfortable in his life, didn’t linger. If it hadn’t been for Stein Maddison’s insistence he doubted if he would have been here at all, but Mr. Maddison wasn’t a man one could afford to offend. And of course, at one time Lester Davis had been a valued client, as well as a friend.

  Helen didn’t leave the library. She rang for Hilary to show Mr. Dent out. When the girl returned to say he had gone, she glanced at Helen curiously.

  ‘Can I get you anything, Miss Davis?’

  Helen shook her head. She knew she must be white.

  She was reeling! She waved Hilary away and sat down, her mouth working convulsively as she tried to get a hold of herself. ‘Dear God!’ she gasped, burying her face in her hands.

  Then, as if the agony inside her couldn’t be contained any longer, she’ jumped to her feet and ran from the room. She didn’t go upstairs; somehow the house was suffocating her. Without waiting to find a coat, or even a jacket, she ran outside. The only clear thought in her head was to get away. It was important that she was miles away before Stein came home. She couldn’t face him!

  Gusty showers of sleet came from the east, driven by a wind that was icy cold. It buffeted her slender figure, and before she reached the end of the drive her sweater was almost soaked. As she turned the final corner before the road, a car swept round it, catching her a glancing glow. She landed on the grass verge, not hurt but shaken.

  ‘You little fool!’ in a daze she heard Stein’s voice as he dragged her inside the car. ‘You’re making a habit of this!’

  ‘Am I?’ She blinked at him, trying to focus.

  Everything swam before her eyes. She couldn’t see his face, but his voice was harsh.

  ‘Where the hell were you going?’ he snapped, thrusting her away from him against the seat.

  Mercifully she didn’t have to find an answer as Paul, suspecting a crisis, put on a spurt. Reaching the house he swiftly opened the car door to let them out, Helen’s obvious state of shock providing a chance to prove his ability to react with speed in an emergency.

  With an abrupt nod of dismissal, Stein put his arm round Helen, half lifting her into the house. He didn’t stop until they reached the library where Hilary was replenishing the dying fire.

  He got rid of her as quickly as he had Paul, before she could comment on Helen’s bedraggled appearance.

  The fire smouldered and the room was chilly, despite the central heating. Helen shivered, wondering if she would ever be warm again. Stein’s face might have been fashioned from stone. A whimper escaped her white lips as he dumped her unceremoniously in the nearest chair.

  ‘Now you can tell me why you were trying to commit suicide,’ he ground out. ‘If you’d dashed on to the main road as carelessly as you came round that corner, you wouldn’t have stood a chance!’

  CHAPTER FIVE

  ‘I WASN’T trying to do anything like that,’ Helen whispered.

  ‘Then what were you trying to do?’ Stein demanded.

  As if he couldn’t guess! ‘Mr. Dent…’ she began hoarsely.

  ‘Ah, so that’s it!’ A cruel smile curved the strong lips. ‘Given you something of a shock, has he?’

  ‘Why didn’t you tell me?’ she shivered. She would have given anything for a drink. She looked longingly at the glass of whisky Stein was pouring for himself, but he didn’t appear to notice. He didn’t offer her anything, not even a cup of tea. Helen reminded herself she wasn’t entitled to anything. Nor had she any money to pay for anything.

  He swallowed his drink in one go, then poured himself another which he sat down with and savoured slowly. He might have been deliberately taunting her with it. As her staring eyes fixed on it he turned the glass consideringly in his long, steely fingers.

  ‘Why didn’t I tell you what?’ he asked almost idly.

  She caught her breath on a sob. He meant to make her spell it out, and could she blame him? In his position she might have been contemplating slow murder, with every bit as much of the brutal anticipation she could read in his eyes.

  ‘That you own everything.’

  ‘Everything?’ One dark brow lifted sardonically.

  Helen whispered, too miserable to be angry at such obvious baiting, ‘The firm, the house, everything I thought Dad owned. Why did neither of you say anything?’

  His eyes flashed coldly on her face. ‘Why didn’t you try and work it out for yourself? I’ll tell you why!’ his voice hardened with contempt as he answered his own question. ‘You were too busy jumping to the worst possible conclusions. You decided I was a scoundrel, a liar, a cheat, without any evidence whatsoever. Perhaps I was waiting to see how low I could go, in your estimation, I mean.’

  Knowing she had no defense, Helen swallowed painfully. ‘I’m sorry, Stein. I had no idea.’

  ‘Or you would have regarded me quite differently. Is that what you’re trying to say?’

  His cold sarcasm hit her like a blow. If she had known it would have altered everything, she couldn’t deny it, but not for the reasons he hinted at, surely? Yet how could she be sure of this? Hadn’t she frequently condemned him in her own mind of being all the things he had just stated?

  Wretchedly she didn’t try to defend herself. ‘I thought you were out for what you could get,’ she admitted not attempting to hide her guilt. ‘When Mr. Dent told me you controlled a group of international companies, I couldn’t believe it. But he had proof.’

  ‘Of course you would need that,’ Stein retorted derisively. ‘That’s why I sent for him.’

  Dully she asked. ‘Why didn’t you send for him last week? You did say it was to give me time to recover from the funeral, but I don’t think that was the real reason. Not now.’

  He didn’t argue. ‘Perhaps,’ he grated, ‘I didn’t want to be too unkind, not until I was convinced you hadn’t changed.’

  Blankly she stared at him. ‘Changed?’

  ‘From the spoilt little bitch you were when you went away.’

  While she flinched from his scorn, Helen knew she had given him every reason to remember her in this light, as this was the impression she must have given.

  She wasn’t sure, even now, exactly why. She had frittered her time away trying to find some relief from her resentment of Stein an
d her father. But it had been more than that. She had been terrified of what happened to her whenever she got too near Stein.

  Subconsciously she had been frightened that the hold he appeared to have over her emotions might make her forget everything she imagined him guilty of. He didn’t know this, of course, and she would never tell him. It didn’t matter now and her only refuge lay in silence.

  How he would jeer if she were to say, ‘I was falling in love with you and thought you were deliberately encouraging me’ in order to get your hands on my father’s money.’

  Bleakly she murmured, ‘You don’t think I’ve changed?’

  ‘No, I do not!’ he snapped harshly. ‘Haven’t the last few days proved it? You couldn’t wait to start throwing your weight about. You tried to dismiss Mrs Swinden and even ordered me out.’