Sweet Satisfaction

by Paige, Violet

  “You ok, Lexi?” Helena asked as she packed her brushes into a black case .

  I nodded. “Just thinking .”

  She sat next to me. “Don’t let Jake get to you .”

  “No, it’s not him. Well, only partially him.” My eyes drifted toward her. “Do you ever feel like we’re in fishbowl? Like everyone is watching us ?”

  She put an arm around my shoulder. “I see you in that fishbowl, honey. But that’s nothing new. What’s going on ?”

  I shook her off. “Nothing.” I took another look in the mirror and pressed my lips together. “I’m thinking too much about the concert tonight.” There were things I couldn’t even talk to Helena about .

  How could she understand the guilt I felt surrounded by the life of privilege I had built? Was there any way to make it sound as if I appreciated it, but yet was completely burdened by my fame and wealth ?

  I walked into the living room and pulled my guitar from the stand. I sat by the window, staring out over the city. I closed my eyes, strummed a few chords and let the music I wanted to sing pour out of me. The words I wanted to shout. The sound I wanted people to hear flew through my fingers and my chest as if I needed to get it out before I lost the ability to breathe .

  Five

  Luke

  T he tie was too tight against my neck, and the jacket stretched against my biceps. I dropped the snarl from my face, tugging at my collar as the back of the limo opened and I stood on the red carpet with a barrage of flashes going off in my face. I plastered a smile so wide from cheek to cheek that even a GQ cover model would be envious .

  By the time I made it to the door of the new hospital wing I had posed for fifty pictures and I needed a fucking drink. I headed straight for the bar but stopped when I saw the bartender. She was a hot brunette I had met before. She smiled at me, throwing me a soft wave with her fingers. I remembered those plump lips and what they could do. The only thing was I didn’t remember her name or where we met .

  I immediately turned around and looked for something to distract me. Anything to keep me away from her and the bottle of top shelf bourbon she was offering. Fuck .

  I didn’t want to be here. Hell, I almost hadn’t come. But Coach had ordered a car to pick me up, and I knew that meeting today was more than a warning. It was practically a death sentence in the league. If the Warriors released me for code of conduct violations, I’d be blackballed from every team. The money would dry up. My legacy would be extinct. I’d never throw another football again .

  So I put on the fucking monkey suit. I got in the car. I let the driver deposit me on the red carpet. But this wasn’t over. I wasn’t Applewhite’s bitch. He put me in a corner in front of McCade, but we weren’t done. He wouldn’t always have the old man next to him. Tonight would be the last time he’d tell me where I had to spend my time .

  I resisted the urge to walk over to the bar and get the brunette’s number .

  “Luke? Luke Canton. Hell, son, good to see you here.” I got a slap on the back from a man wearing an oversized Stetson and a bolero with his tuxedo .

  “Yes, sir.” I shook his hand, giving him a solid impact .

  “Looking forward to the game Sunday. You give those Sharks hell for us .”

  “Oh, I will, sir. I will.” I nodded .

  The man’s wife came walking over in one of those floor-length ball gowns. Nothing on her was natural. I guessed there was a thirty-year age difference between the two .

  She smiled at me, raking me over with lust in her eyes. “Bob, aren’t you going to introduce me ?”

  She held her hand toward me, and I saw the rocks lining her fingers. The man must have bought her half the diamonds in Texas. Now I understood the attraction .

  Bob chuckled, looking at me. “This is my wife, Vienna. She’s a big Warriors fan .”

  I felt the softness of her palm as she slid her hand into mine. “Nice to meet you .”

  Her skin was flawless and there wasn’t a curve on her body that wasn’t planned. Her neck was long and slender. She turned her head sideways like a cat as she eyed my chest .

  I grinned. Now this was the perfect kind of woman. She already had a man to feed her money habit. She wasn’t looking for fame. She only wanted to fuck. I let my fingers drag across her wrist before I let go .

  “Can I get you a drink, Mrs . –”

  “Crawford.” She winked. “Yes, a white wine would be nice .”

  I looked at Bob. “You’re a lucky man, sir. I’ll be right back .”

  I took long strides to a bar on the other side of the room. I didn’t care about the brunette at the moment .

  “One white wine.” I slid a fifty across the counter .

  The bartender opened a new chilled bottle and handed me a glass. “Anything for you, sir ?”

  I shook my head. “Not right now,” I shouted over the music .

  The Austin Symphony played on the second level of the hospital. The loud sounds of the cello and violins fell over the balcony, dropping on the guests like rain. This wasn’t my kind of scene. I was much happier in a pair of broken-in jeans, T-shirt, and holding a beer in my hand .

  If things played out the way I thought they would, Mrs. Crawford would give me the fix I needed tonight. She had the potential to make me forget the stuffy band. The pretentious crowd. The disappointed looks on the donors’ faces as I walked by .

  I returned to the couple and handed Vienna her drink. She ran her teeth over her bottom lip. “Thank you, Luke .”

  “Sure thing.” I wasn’t known for being a gentleman, but I did know what women liked. I doubted tonight was going to change that reputation. Especially when I fucked Bob Crawford’s wife .

  She placed a hand on my forearm. “You know I watch every single game. Bob and I have a box at the stadium .”

  “That’s right,” Bob added. “It was my daddy’s. We’re there every home game. Hoping for some playoff games this season, son .”

  I hated when people called me son. It was one of those cocky Texas phrases that seemed like it was endearing, but I knew it was damn condescending .

  “That’s the plan, sir.” I stuffed my hands in my pockets .

  “It’s been a while since we’ve had any luck in the playoffs,” he reminded me .

  I didn’t like where this conversation was headed. “New season. New team.” It was my standard answer .

  “And the game against the Wranglers?” he prodded .

  “You know sir, we don’t get sucked into that rivalry BS.” It was a lie I told repeatedly. We hated that team. The in-state league rivalry fueled hatred between the San Antonio Wranglers and us every season. Conversations like this didn’t help .

  Bob slapped me on the back again. The bastard was staring to annoy the piss out of me. I saw the signs for the silent auction, pointing down the hall and away from the Crawfords. I’d have to make my way back to Vienna later in the night .

  “If you’ll excuse me. I’ve got to make some bids. Want to make my contributions for the kids. Nice meeting you folks.” I nodded at them and strolled away toward the room with the auction items .

  I started at one end of the long room and pretended to scan over the donated items. Each one started with a minimum bid of a thousand dollars. There were golf packages. Trips to Maui. I saw a signed print of the Warriors and walked past it. It was more up-to-date than the one in Applewhite’s office .

  I scribbled my name on a set of golf clubs. I looked around for something else. Coach said I needed to win some of the higher dollar pieces to draw attention to my generosity. The whole thing was bullshit. Tomorrow morning I’d have to tell that dick Charlie how much I paid out .

  I moved to the next table. There was a diamond ring. Too small for the Crawfords, I thought. There were fur coats. I saw a trip for two to Greece. I sure as hell wasn’t bidding on that .

  “Oh, are you bidding on the horses?” a smooth voice spoke next to me .

  I turned to see who was watching me. She
was cute, but dangerous. I could tell from the deep V-cut of her dress. It dipped all the way to her navel, revealing creamy white skin .

  “Just looking,” I answered. My eyes locked on her stomach .

  “I love to ride.” She picked up the pamphlet on the stables. “Really ride.” She grinned .

  Fuck. Did Coach know this was going to happen? Was this some kind of personal hell he had put me in to test me? The bartender. The hot as shit wife. And now this little sex kitten talking about riding. My cock twitched .

  I took a deep breath. “I’m from Texas. We all know how to ride horses.” I bent down to add my name to the list. I didn’t know what I would do with a pair of pedigree horses, but I wasn’t going to walk away. The woman was basically purring on me, coaxing me to place a bid .

  “So, if you win the horses, you’ll take me for a riding lesson?” Her red lips curled in a smile .

  “I thought you already knew how to ride.” I straightened my shoulders. She was making this hard .

  She picked up the pen from the auction clipboard, tore off a corner of the list, and scribbled her phone number on the scrap of paper .

  “If you win, call me. You might teach me something new.” She handed me her number and sashayed away, showing me how deliciously curvy her ass was .

  I held my spot in front of the horse display, willing myself not to chase after her. Women were falling from the sky tonight. Coach thought he was sending me somewhere safe, but he might as well have sent me straight to a strip club .

  What I needed was a fucking drink .

  I added my name to a few more of the lists before the lights started to flicker in the auction room. An announcer piped in over the loud speakers, “Ladies and gentleman, if you’d please finalize your bids and move to the main lobby. The concert will begin in five minutes .”

  I had forgotten about the concert. Lexi Wilde was performing tonight. I’d listen to the first few songs and then call my driver. I didn’t need to stick around until the end of the show .

  She wasn’t my kind of music. All she sang about was falling in love, family, and living out dreams. I knew who she was because she was on every single Texas country station. She was interviewed every night. You couldn’t get away from the girl. Her bright blue eyes and innocent smile were plastered on magazine covers and billboards .

  I followed the crowd to the lobby where the mayor of Austin was prepared to cut the ribbon for the opening of the hospital. At least the damn symphony had stopped. I looked up to see long black curtains draped over the side with LW interlaced in white .

  I listened to the mayor’s speech, while the people around me bobbed their heads in agreement. I posed for a few pictures with fans and then skirted my way to the front. I stepped off to the side. I figured the closer I was to the star, the less likely I was to be the center of attention .

  The lights dimmed and I rolled my eyes as the tuxedo and sequin-clad audience clapped as if we were at a golf tournament. This party couldn’t be duller. I was sober. I had paid a fortune for crap I was never going to use, and I’d lost sight of Vienna Crawford. She probably had to leave early to get her husband tucked in bed .

  I pulled my phone out to message the driver as the lights went out. I looked up as the spotlight made a bright white circle at the back of the stage .

  It was all theatrics. Even in a small space like this, I could see the way it was choreographed. How Lexi would emerge and the fans would fall at her feet. Shit, there wasn’t much difference between this and running out of the tunnel on the Warriors’ field. The lights. The smoke. The intro music .

  I saw this every week. The way the guys huddled together in the tunnel. The way the crowd roared before we took the field .

  I felt my chest tighten for a second. I didn’t want to be anybody’s damn circus clown. This entire production reminded me that was exactly what I was. The Warriors were turning me into their own pop princess and I wasn’t going to play their game .

  I turned to leave. I didn’t give a shit if Coach was mad I didn’t stay until the end. I had done enough for one night. I shoved my phone in my pocket just as the drums crescendoed and then there was silence, except for one clear note. One piercing note that ricocheted off the walls, and made everyone stare at the stage .

  I stopped in my tracks and looked over my shoulder. The spotlight blurred her into a blaze of white, but slowly the lights evaporated like the smoke, and standing on stage was Lexi Wilde .

  I didn’t know when it happened, but I pivoted and pushed past the people in front of me, taking my post on the side of the crowd again. I could see over everyone. One of the advantages of being six five .

  And what I saw was like white fire. I couldn’t look away. I’d probably heard this song before. I’d heard all her songs, but I always turned the station. I didn’t know what she was singing about, or what the lyrics meant. But there was something in her voice. A pureness I heard without the instruments drowning her out. Without all the electronic manipulation .

  And as stupid as it sounds, I thought I saw her look at me from the stage. She smiled with big innocent eyes as she leaned down to touch the hands of the kids they had lined up in the front row. But it was there. A look. Maybe a wink. Her sapphire eyes were shining in my direction .

  She held the mic, walking down the stairs and made her rounds through the children. She stopped for hugs. She stopped to take selfies, the entire time singing her song, not missing a single solid beat .

  I watched as she took the steps again and stood at the front of the stage. “Hello, Austin.” She waved .

  The crowd clapped and I heard the kids making whooping sounds for her .

  “Thank y’all for inviting me here tonight.” She grinned at the front row. “Because this is a special occasion. And I’m honored and blessed to be here with you to open the children’s wing of Austin’s Westwood Hospital.” She knew when to pause for the applause. “So, tonight this is a celebration. It’s a night to feel good about what we’ve done for these children, and for all of the children who are going to walk through those doors.” She pointed behind the crowd .

  “So don’t be bashful. We have a lot to celebrate. And we still have a lot of funds to raise. Put your hands together and let’s get this party started .”

  She began to clap and the crowd was in unison with her. I looked around at the spell she had cast over these people. They were happy. They fucking loved her .

  And that’s when I realized there was a part about the football glitz I loved. The flood of adrenaline. The fans chanting my name. The cheerleaders screaming on the sidelines. It was fucking amazing. The rush of football. It was everything to me. And for a split second, Lexi Wilde looked at me and I felt it. I felt that same rush .

  And I couldn’t move. I couldn’t turn away. The gentle sway of her hips and the way her eyes lit every time she turned toward my end of the stage captured my full attention. I was stuck. Stuck listening to something angelic in her voice. Stuck waiting for the next song to play .

  I followed her legs and those sexy boots as she moved from one end of the small stage to the other. There was something fascinating about Lexi Wilde and I had to figure out what it was. Why I couldn’t turn away. Why I stared. Why I suddenly picked up my phone and needed to cancel my car .

  Six

  Alexa

  “B abe, that was beautiful. You were beautiful.” Jake met me at the back of the stage, handing me a bottle of water, and planted a kiss on my cheek. He looked almost as flush as I was .

  I twisted the cap and took a few sips. It wasn’t one of my full-blown concerts, but it was an entire set and I could already feel my voice starting to crack. He had pushed me too hard to do the extra meet and greet, and added an interview with the Austin Times .

  “Thanks.” I held the bottle against my chest. It started to soak through my white shirt .

  “The press is going crazy. You should see the social media accounts. They are blowing up. I can’t keep up
with all of them .”

  I glared at him. “Jake, these are sick kids. I’m not trying to exploit that .”

  “No, you leave that part to me .”

  He was like an evil genius I couldn’t control. I didn’t know when the switch had occurred for him. There was a time when he was a friend, a confidant even, but now he was hungry to be at the top. And I was his only way to stay there. He didn’t care if that meant using sick children for photo ops, or offering a free concert for national publicity. He was starving for every headline I could capture .

  “What time do we leave tomorrow?” I asked. I rarely knew my schedule ahead of time, but I had been promised a few days home in Nashville. I had visions of sleeping in my own bed .

  He steered me toward the side of the stage where we could talk without fan interruptions. “First, we have more photo ops. The mayor wants a picture .”

  “Of course she does .”

  “And before we take off in the afternoon I have you scheduled to stop by as many of the kids’ rooms as possible. Take your guitar and play a few of their favorites. They’ll want autographs. Meet a few of the doctors. You know the drill, babe .”

  “That I don’t have a problem with.” I was about to lay into him about all of the other things he expected of me when my back slammed into something as solid as a wall, but it had arms and a chest .

  I turned slowly and looked up. I knew that chiseled face and grin. I had seen those bedroom eyes pop up more than once in the headlines. What was Luke Canton doing here? This was definitely not his kind of scene .

  “Sorry,” I eked .

  “No, don’t apologize. I was coming back stage to see you. Good show .”

  I stared at his massive frame. “You came to see me? You like my music ?”

  He shoved his hands in his pockets. “I liked it tonight .”

  I laughed. “I guess I’ll take that. I just don’t see you as the country fan boy type.” The Warriors’ quarterback was notorious for partying, and I didn’t think any of my songs would make it on to his playlist .