Savage SEAL’s Virgin: A Submissives’ Secrets Novel
Page 43
He stopped and pulled out of her. Then she was picked up and laid out on the bed flat on her back. Her cuffed hands looped over something and then she felt something go around one ankle.
It was cold and her leg was pulled and then it was obvious to her he had cuffed her leg to something that held it in place. The same was done to the other, and she was helpless to move at all.
“Do you trust me?” he asked her.
“Yes, Arsen. I trust you.”
The swoosh of fabric she heard and then she felt his bare skin on hers as he pushed into her again. The wave which had built up had dissipated, and she was no longer in danger of climaxing without his permission.
With her sense of sight gone, she was able to concentrate on everything her body was feeling. The way his large cock was moving inside her felt amazing and his muscles rippled on his stomach, moving against hers.
His breathing was a thing she found amazing. Hard, deep breaths which came from deep in his lungs moved hot air over her cheek and some of her shoulder.
The way he smelled seeped into her senses. His expensive cologne, his sweat, and the unique smell of them together filled her nostrils and made her head feel slightly light. Intoxicating her with the aroma, distinctly them.
His mouth took hers and his tongue moved to the back of her throat. Stroking against hers. It was all getting to be too much for her to handle and she began to feel the orgasm starting. In the position she was in she couldn’t stop it. It was impossible.
His mouth on hers had it where she couldn’t even ask him. Her body climaxed and shook under his. He kept going though. He didn’t stop, didn’t quit kissing her.
Instead she felt his hand move up her arm and take her hands from the thing he’d hooked them to. He pulled them to go around his neck. Stroking hard into her.
He pulled his mouth away and kissed her neck then nipped at her earlobe.
“I love you, baby. I’m sorry, baby. I only want to bring you pleasure and happiness.”
Steele began to cry. She was beginning to get to him. For some reason, making him soften felt wrong. Like she was making him weak.
She wanted in so bad, but to break him down wasn’t what she wanted. “Arsen, I love you.”
His body stiffened, and he groaned as he came. It made her body climax again, and they both were breathing hard as she felt him trembling. She was breaking him and she couldn’t stand herself.
This isn’t what I wanted!
ARSEN
As he un-cuffed her ankles one at a time, he couldn’t stop the ache in his heart. He’d hurt her and he was finding that act unforgiveable. He had no idea what was happening to him.
She lay perfectly still, her eyes still covered. As he released her ankle he saw it was red from where she’d pulled at it. He ran his hand over it and flinched at the sharp pain which stabbed at his heart.
This wasn’t a lifestyle she’d chosen. This wasn’t some fantasy of hers. She wasn’t the woman he was making her be. She cared for him – that was the only reason she even allowed him to do the things he did to her.
He was a monster. The fucking kid had been right about him. He was so set in his ways though. Was it in him to change? To be what the gorgeous woman strapped to his bed deserved?
He released the other ankle and then her wrists. When he pulled the blindfold away, he saw her red rimmed eyes and nearly lost it.
“Steele, baby, please forgive me.” He took her in his arms and held her tight to him.
Her head was on his shoulder and he felt the hot tears rolling over his skin. It was breaking his heart, and he had to swallow the knot down which had formed in his throat.
He picked her up and took her to the shower. The warm water fell over them and he found she was still crying, not hard, but her tears were still flowing. “I’ve lost you, haven’t I?”
She shook her head.
“Far from it, Arsen.”
He was confused and kissed her cheek.
“So why the nonstop tears?”
“Because you told me you’re sorry. I feel like I’m breaking something in you. The thing which makes you who you are.” She looked up at him and he wiped her tears.
“You are changing me. Somehow, you’re so under my skin it feels like you’re a part of me. I brought you into a world you didn’t seek out. I feel now like I was wrong to force you to accept my lifestyle.”
“You don’t want me anymore?” He saw fear in her blue eyes and it further hurt him.
He kissed the tip of her nose.
“Of course I do. Just maybe a little different though.”
She shook her head.
“I want you the same way you had the other women. Arsen, you’ll tire of me quickly if you can’t live the way you have since…” She stopped herself from saying anymore and he saw it.
“Since what, Steele.” He looked at her and lifted her chin.
“I snooped, I told you that. I didn’t tell you that I read your little journal thingy you have locked away in one of the cabinets in your office.” She bit her lip.
Arsen was mad, furious even, but he’d already felt far too much guilt over spanking her. He wasn’t going to let his temper rule him.
“I see, so you know about it all then?” His grip on her loosened some. His mind wandered to the past. A place he hated to go to. “You know I was a weakling and then a submissive myself.”
“Yes, and Arsen, I don’t want you to feel weak again. I don’t want you to feel that way because of me.” She wrapped her arms around him and laid her head on his chest.
The fact was she’d already made him feel weak. His love for her made him weak. He wasn’t in control of himself that was for sure.
“Are you saying you want to live my way so I can stay strong and in control?”
She nodded, and it made him sick. This strong woman was willing to let herself be treated in a way which was beneath her for him and he was ashamed of himself. For the first time in a long time, he was not satisfied with the man he was.
Her eyes met his.
“I want you to make the dom/sub contract, Arsen. I’m ready and willing to live that way with you. I trust you.”
“You aren’t ready and frankly, I doubt you’ll ever be.” Arsen let her go and poured shampoo in his hand and started washing his hair. His heart was pounding in his chest.
The truth was he longed to take her to the BDSM club, Fierce. He knew all the men would be envious of his gorgeous find. He envisioned her on her hands and knees, his collar around her long and slender throat. His leash holding her, telling all the others in the club she was his, and he was her master.
“Arsen, what’s wrong? Why do you think I’m not ready?” She moved to be in front of him. “You don’t want me like that?”
“You have no idea of what you’re in for, Steele. Tell me, has it ever been a fantasy of yours to crawl around on your hands and knees at the end of a leash I’ll hold?” His eyebrows quirked up, and he grinned.
“I could do it for you,” she said and ran her finger in the lines of his chiseled abs. “I could do anything for you, Arsen.”
He rinsed his hair then took her hand from him.
“This wouldn’t be allowed. You’d touch me only when I allowed. You’d be expected to do so much more as a sub. My subs catered to me. They washed my hair and trimmed my nails. They allowed me to take them whenever and where ever I wanted. That included in front of people.”
He saw Steele take in a sharp breath. “Really? Where? Those clubs?”
“Clubs, elevators, semi-secluded booths in restaurants. Where ever whenever. Think you could do that?” He smiled at her again and ran his hand over her shoulder.
Steele wasn’t answering right away, and he laughed.
“Like I said, it’s not a thing you’re ready for and may never be. It’s something I’m coming to terms with.”
“You certainly have done a lot you in your life, haven’t you?” Steele asked as she shuddered.
&n
bsp; Arsen ran his hands up and down her arms.
“I have. More than most and you’d be smart to run away from me, Steele. Not that I’ll let you, but it would be the smart thing for you to do.”
“You choked those girls. Why’d they want you to do that? I actually have a fear of being choked to death,” she said as he turned her around and started shampooing her long, dark hair.
“Why’s that?” he asked as he massaged in the honeysuckle scented shampoo he’d picked up just for her.
“A case I saw played out on television when I was fifteen. A girl came up missing and when they found her months later, they found out she’d been strangled. I looked it up and found it takes a good while for the lack of oxygen to make your brain stop working. The victim is aware they’re dying. It’s awful, so why would people want to be choked?” She looked up at him as he pushed her head back to rinse the shampoo out.
“It’s because of exactly what you read about. They want to be brought just to the point of passing out, then once their throat is released the oxygen hits their brains rapidly and they have a euphoric experience. Add in an orgasm along with that and some people find it to be a phenomenal sensation.” He filled his palm with a honeysuckle scented conditioner and ran it through her hair.
“Have you been on the receiving end of that, Arsen?” Her blue eyes were wide.
Arsen thought it over before he spoke. He didn’t like to think about his time under Mistress Sinclair. It held too many bad memories. But Steele needed to know more about him. He couldn’t expect her to be what he needed in his life without letting her in on some of his past.
He nodded.
“Twice and I hated it both times. It wasn’t a pleasant experience for me. I was a young man, trying to impress my Dom. I should’ve used the safe word, but I refused to show my weakness and ended up passing out both times. I woke with a headache and an aching throat. On top of that, I was further disciplined for not using the safe word.”
Steele ran her arms around Arsen and hugged him.
“I don’t know what I’ll do if I ever meet that horrible bitch, Arsen.”
“Not a damn thing, Steele. I won’t have you getting into any kind of altercation with her. She can take a fuck load of pain and you can’t. Believe me she knows so many ways to hurt you it’s not even funny.” He wrapped his arms around her and thought how good it felt to be talking to her about things.
Arsen never realized he’d want to talk about such things and with a female at that. It was crazy what she had him doing. He kissed the top of her head and felt a shift in his future was happening.
STEELE
As Arsen held her in his arms, Steele was able to see out the one window in the bathroom. On the sidewalk below, was the same man from the police station. He was looking up at the penthouse. Just staring.
That man needed to be looked at as a person of interest in the murders. She pulled back and pointed out the window.
“Look whose outside, Arsen.”
He turned and muttered, “Fuck.”
After turning off the water in the shower, he got out and wrapped a towel around his waist then wrapped one around Steele.
“Who is he, Arsen?”
“An old client of mine. The one case I lost.” He took her hand and led her out of the bathroom and into his bedroom. “This is probably not a good thing he’s out there.”
“What kind of case was it you lost?” she asked as he pulled one of his soft T-shirts out of a drawer and pulled it over her head.
“A murder case. Allen White was convicted of murdering his high school math teacher. He kidnapped her and kept her hidden away for a couple of months then killed her. Her body was tortured in many unbelievable ways.” Arsen pulled on a pair of blue pajama bottoms and led Steele to the kitchen.
“How come he’s out of prison then?” she asked as Arsen began to pull things out of the refrigerator to make sandwiches.
“Grab the bread, please,” he said as he placed a jar of mustard on the island in the large kitchen. “I was called by a member of the parole board several months ago. It seems Mr. White managed to gain his freedom by becoming a jail house evangelist.”
“So he found Jesus, and that alone got him out of prison?” Steele took a knife from a drawer and slathered fours slices of bread with mustard. “Is that all it takes to be set free after torturing and murdering a person?”
“Apparently.” Arsen placed three pieces of turkey on two of the mustard covered slices of bread. “The thing is, he was let out approximately three weeks before the first murder. So he could very well be the murderer.”
“Why target those women?” Steele asked as she placed slices of cheese on the two sandwiches.
Arsen piled lettuce on each sandwich.
“Well, I was feeling like I needed something in my life. The random women weren’t doing it for me. I was feeling like I needed more in my life. I went to see each woman who had been my subs a few times to see if there was any type of spark. I suppose he wanted to take away anyone that I cared about.”
Steele cut a tomato up and placed slices on the sandwiches then Arsen placed the other pieces of bread on top and placed each one on plates. He carried them to the table and Steele grabbed two bottles of water from the fridge and a jar of pickles.
She sat across from him. “Why haven’t you told the police about your hunch?”
“Do you think it would do one bit of good to do that? I mean, it’s my handprints on each of their throats. If it was him, he must’ve managed to kill them without leaving a trace of DNA anywhere.” He took a bite of the sandwich.
Steele stabbed a couple of pickles out of the jar and placed one on her plate and one on his.
“We need to investigate him.”
“I do,” Arsen wagged his finger at her. “You are not to go anywhere near the man.”
“I can help you.” She wagged her finger right back at him and smiled.
“Minutes ago, you were wanting me to write up a contract and now you want to argue with me about something. Really, Steele,” he said with a grin.
“So if I’m going to be your sub, my opinion no longer matters?” she asked then took a drink of the water.
“It’s complicated. What I say goes. Arguing will get you punished. Let’s face it, you can’t really take punishment, Steele.” He frowned and looked down. “And I really can’t take dishing it out to you.”
Steele reached across the table and ran her fingers over the back of his hand. “I really shouldn’t have been alone with Rowan. He did exactly what you said he would. I’m not upset with you.”
“I’m not happy with myself, Steele. Things have to change.” Arsen put the half-eaten sandwich down.
“Take me to your club, Arsen. I want to see how it is. I want to know the you that you’re trying to change. If you’re trying to change for me, you need to know that I don’t want you too,” she said as her fingers traced a pattern on the back of his hand.
Arsen’s tone went sharp and commanding. “Take your hand off me.”
Steele pulled her hand back and looked down. “Sorry.”
“So, that’s what you really want?” he snapped at her.
Steele had to think. She wanted to know what his lifestyle was really like. Rowan had made her curious about Arsen’s room in the BDSM club.
“Yes, Sir.”
He let out a harsh laugh. “On your knees, now.”
Steele’s stomach went tight. A part of her wanted that, and another part was appalled she wanted it. She got off the chair and got on her knees.
Arsen got up and walked away, leaving her in the kitchen on her knees. When he came back, she didn’t look up at him. He placed something around her neck. Then a clicking sound she heard near her left ear and a quick jerk she felt as Arsen apparently had attached a leash to the thing around her neck.
She swallowed hard as she realized he’d put a collar on her and had her at the end of a leash. Like an animal. And he was her master
. “To my room.”
Steele started to get up, and he jerked the leash hard. “On your hands and knees.”
She began to crawl towards his bedroom and she was surprised to find herself getting turned on. Once she was in the room, he stopped and said, “If I take you to that club, you’ll have to crawl in front of a room full of men and women while you wear clothes that show your tits and ass.” He moved around in front of her. “Take my cock out.”
Steele swallowed hard and reached up. Taking his cock out of his pajama bottoms. Then let it go. It was erect and near her face. His hand took the back of her neck, roughly. “Suck it.”
He pressed her head to him and she opened her mouth and took it in. She tried to run her hands up to it and he slapped one away. “I didn’t tell you to touch me, woman.”
He moved her head back and forth, forcefully. Steele was aroused and moaned. But found her head pulled back quickly. Arsen pulled her hair, making her look up at him. “You make a sound without my instruction in that place and your ass will be hot before you know what you’ve done. Also, you will have to endure this as others watch. And if I want, I can make you suck any man’s dick in the place. Sounding like something you still find intriguing?”
Steele answered with a smile, “You’d never allow any part of me to touch another man, Arsen. We both know that.”
His smile grew sinister. “Baby, you have no idea what I’ll allow. The fact is I made all my other subs do things with other men as I watched. They got ate out and I wouldn’t allow them to come. If they did, not only did I punish them but so did the other man.”
“Arsen!” she said and found her stomach growing tight. “You didn’t!”
He nodded. “I made them have sex with other men while I watched and dared them to enjoy it. I used their bodies any fucking way I wanted to and if that’s what you want from me, then I can do that for you, Steele. Is that what you want? Me to take you in front of people and put you under other men and dare you to enjoy it? Dare you to tell me no about anything?”