Battle Tested

by Janie Crouch

  He grabbed her arms and set her back from him. “Look, I’ve worked around people who have been traumatized by violence. Sometimes it’s hard to recognize the symptoms in yourself. I just don’t want you to do something you might regret.”

  Rosalyn smiled. She appreciated his concern, she really did. But this wasn’t something she was going to regret—she was positive about that. “Believe me, I’m not going to regret this.”

  She tried to step forward but he stopped her.

  “Well, have you considered that maybe I don’t want to do this? That it’s something I’ll regret?” Frustration flavored his tone.

  He didn’t want her. The reality hit her like a bucket of ice. She immediately stepped back from him.

  What did she expect, really? She’d lied to him, stolen from him, dragged him into a situation that had almost gotten him killed twice. Not to mention shown up pregnant with his baby.

  Of course getting involved with her physically wasn’t a good idea for him. Yeah, there was heat between them, but he was smart enough to know that wasn’t enough to justify getting close to her.

  All the perk, all the joy seemed to drain out of her. “You’re right—I hadn’t thought of that. Smart move on your part.”

  “Rosalyn...” He took a step toward her.

  She immediately jerked back. He couldn’t touch her. Not now. If he did, she might shatter into a million pieces. “I’m going to take a shower.”

  She turned and all but ran.

  * * *

  STEVE WATCHED ROSALYN nearly run across the room to the bathroom.

  Damn it. What the hell was the matter with him? Why would he say that to her?

  He was the director of one of the most prestigious law enforcement agencies in the country. He regularly spoke to the congressmen, senators, the president’s advisers. Hell, he’d even spoken to two different presidents in his tenure as the director of the Critical Response Division.

  He was known for being well-spoken. Known for reading a situation and doing and/or saying whatever was needed. He had a team of dozens of people who looked to him to provide guidance and leadership. To know the words that needed to be said when everything around them was falling apart.

  Yet somehow he’d just managed to say the worst possible thing to one small, fragile woman who’d just been reaching out to him for human contact.

  And the worst thing about his ridiculous words? None of them were true.

  Not want her? That was so far from the truth he could barely wrap his mind around it.

  But he was convinced she felt beholden to him. That she wouldn’t really want him under normal circumstances that didn’t involve life-threatening situations.

  Of course, he wanted her pretty desperately, and life-threatening situations were commonplace for him.

  His fingers itched to touch her. To run through her hair and along her body. To see the changes pregnancy had made, beyond what he could make out from beneath her clothes.

  He wanted her with a passion that went against everything in his calm, collected nature. He couldn’t ever remember wanting anyone this much. Not even his wife, Melanie. They’d loved each other, absolutely, but with the low simmer of the knowledge that they would have the rest of their lives together to work through their love.

  The rest of their lives together had ended up being only six short years.

  The fire that consumed him every time he was around Rosalyn was so different from that it almost couldn’t be compared. Being around her caused him to lose his cool. Lose his focus.

  Melanie would approve. Deep in the back of his mind, Steve knew his wife would approve of the young woman in the bathroom who had stayed alive under some pretty desperate circumstances. Would approve of the fact that Rosalyn shook him up enough to make him say stupid things.

  He heard the shower turn on in the bathroom.

  And maybe Rosalyn just wanted him because she wanted him. Not because of anything else but this damn heat between them. An itch that had just barely gotten scratched six months ago and had been driving them both crazy ever since.

  Maybe he’d just sent her running despondent into the bathroom not because he didn’t want her—he almost laughed outright at the thought—but because of some ridiculous, completely wrong feeling of overprotection.

  He was an idiot.

  The bathroom door opened but her head didn’t pop out. “You know what, Drackett? You’re an idiot.”

  His legs were moving before his brain had even processed what was going on. He caught the bathroom door just before it shut and pushed it all the way open.

  Rosalyn’s mouth made a little o.

  But the heat burned in her eyes the way he knew it burned in his.

  “You know what? I am an idiot.”

  He kissed her.

  There was no gentleness in the kiss. No finesse.

  But there was plenty of heat and need and passion.

  He lifted her up and set her on the bathroom vanity, then grabbed her hips and slid her all the way to the edge until she was flush up against him. They both groaned as her calves hooked around the backs of his thighs. Her fingers linked behind his neck, keeping him against her.

  “Rosalyn, I’m sorry—” He began his murmured apology against her mouth, but she stopped him.

  “No apologies. No talking. No thinking.”

  He couldn’t hide the effect she had on him, didn’t even try to pretend he could control his response. He just let the heat take over.

  As he stripped them both out of their clothes and slipped his arms around her hips to carry her with him to the shower—unwilling to separate their bodies for even the few steps it would take for them to walk—he hoped the heat consuming them both wouldn’t burn them away.

  Leaving nothing but ash in its place.

  Chapter Twelve

  They got on the road again early, after catching a quick breakfast. By lunch they were only a few hours from Colorado Springs. They stopped at a truck-stop diner just outside Dalhart, Texas, off Highway 87.

  Rosalyn felt rested. She shouldn’t, since she’d been awake for a big chunk of the night for the best of reasons, but she did.

  Steve had seemed fascinated by the changes in her body that had come about from the pregnancy. She was right at the perfect stage: not sick and tired all the time like she’d been in the early days, but not so big that she was waddling around. She knew that would be coming soon.

  There were a lot of things unsettled about her future. What was she going to do when she got to Colorado Springs? Get a job and stay there? She had some money she’d saved from working at the diner, but not enough. Especially not when the baby came.

  Another thing she and Steve needed to talk about. The list was getting pretty long.

  She was concerned about the future but for the first time the thought didn’t send her into a near panic.

  Maybe it was the knowledge that the Watcher could no longer find her now that the transmitting devices in her clothes were gone. Maybe it was because Steve was here and believed she was in danger.

  But she had slept like she hadn’t been able to sleep in months. Even when she’d been at the Ammonses’ house and it seemed liked the Watcher couldn’t find her, she hadn’t slept this good.

  She was sure having Steve’s arms around her helped.

  But even if they hadn’t made love, if he hadn’t held her, she knew just his presence made a huge difference to her psyche. She wasn’t alone. And although there was a lot she and Steve still needed to work out, she knew it would happen eventually.

  He was looking through her notebook now, the one with all the dates and recordings of the notes or messages the Watcher had given her.

  “I wish we hadn’t lost all the notes in the fire.” She sipped on h
er iced tea, knowing she shouldn’t be drinking caffeine, but surely one cup wouldn’t hurt. She savored it as well as her large lunch.

  Steve shrugged. “They would’ve helped for sure, especially with prosecution for stalking. But this notebook gives us a lot of information. My people will be able to see what patterns can be established from this.”

  “Detective Johnson steered me right by telling me to write everything down. Actually, at the time, I think he just told me that to give me something proactive to do. Make me feel less like a victim, more like an active part in an investigation.”

  And it had worked. For the first time Rosalyn had felt hopeful. Right up until Johnson had died two days later.

  Steve took her hand. “I already have people looking into his death and the mechanic’s. They’ll dig through what it looks like on the surface to what’s actually underneath, okay?”

  Rosalyn nodded. “Thank you.”

  He handed the notebook back to her. “I’m going to pay and use the restroom. Then we’ll hit the road again. We should make it to Colorado Springs by this afternoon.”

  She smiled. “I’ll try not to sleep the entire day away this time.”

  He stood up. “You can do whatever you need to—don’t worry about that. It’s been a stressful couple of days. Your body needs rest.”

  It had been a stressful year. But she just nodded.

  She was thankful Steve was looking into Detective Johnson’s and Shawn the mechanic’s deaths. She still didn’t know exactly what Steve did in law enforcement, but evidently he was pretty high up. He hadn’t offered any information and she hadn’t wanted to ask.

  She needed to call the Ammonses before they got back on the road. She needed to let them know she was okay. They didn’t have a phone upstairs at their house, due mostly to Jim’s paranoia that the government was listening or watching them, but had one at the café.

  Rosalyn got change from the waitress and went into the hallway lined with phones, a throwback from before everyone had cell phones and truckers used to have to make calls to their loved ones from pay phones. She dialed the number for the Ammonses’ café, then put in the change required to connect the call.

  “Main Street Cafe.”

  “Hi, Cheryl, it’s—”

  “Oh, Rosalyn, honey! Thank goodness you’re okay.”

  It was the most emotion she’d ever heard out of the stoic Cheryl.

  “I’m sorry if you’ve been worried about me. I should’ve called earlier.”

  But a deranged stalker found me again, killed my sister, then tried to kill me twice.

  Rosalyn had never told the Ammonses about the Watcher. She suspected they knew she was on the run from someone but had never pressed for details and she’d never given any.

  “That’s all right. I’m just glad to hear you’re safe now. Jim was worried too.”

  Rosalyn laughed. “I don’t think Jim worries about anything but the government encroaching on his boundaries.”

  “Well, he talked yesterday about putting a phone line in the house so you could call there if you needed anything.”

  Rosalyn felt tears come to her eyes. For Jim to have considered that, he really did care about her. “Cheryl, I’ll just call the café, okay? Tell Jim he doesn’t need to do anything so drastic like get a phone in the house.”

  The words were in jest, but Rosalyn meant it. She knew what it meant for Jim to have even considered it.

  “Are you coming back? You know you’re welcome anytime. You and the baby.”

  “Thanks, Cheryl.” Emotion choked Rosalyn’s voice. “I’ve got some things to take care of. But I might be back. I don’t know yet.”

  “Well, we both mean it when we say we want you here. Don’t forget that, okay?”

  “Yes, ma’am. I’m with the baby’s father now and we’re trying to get some stuff figured out.” Probably not the stuff Cheryl was thinking of, but that didn’t matter. “I’ll call in a couple of days with an update, okay?”

  “You be careful, hon. And remember you’ve always got a home here if you want it.”

  “Thanks, Cheryl. Give Jim my love.”

  “I will. Bye.”

  Rosalyn put the phone receiver back in its cradle and leaned her head against it. It was nice to know she had someone who cared about her. That she had options. But she wondered if she was opening up the Ammonses to the Watcher’s clutches. What if he found her again? If she went back there, would she be leading him to them? She couldn’t stand the thought of the older couple falling victim to him.

  Maybe she’d done the wrong thing by calling them at all. But surely with the transmitters gone, no harm would come to them.

  She looked up to find Steve staring at her, eyes narrowed. She gave him a little wave as he walked over, but all the easy camaraderie they’d had at lunch, the closeness they’d shared last night seemed to be gone.

  “I would’ve let you use my phone if you needed to make a call. You didn’t have to pay for it.”

  “That’s okay. I didn’t want to bother you. And I didn’t want to waste time. I know we’re trying to make it to Colorado Springs as quickly as we can.”

  Rosalyn was still a little overcome with emotion after talking to Cheryl. It must be pregnancy hormones or something. But the thought of Jim agreeing to put a phone in his house just because of her had tears rushing to her eyes again. She turned away so Steve wouldn’t see.

  “Ready to go?” she asked.

  Steve grabbed her arm. “Who were you talking to, Rosalyn?”

  The anger behind the words took her aback. “Who do you think I was talking to?”

  “I don’t know. All I know is I leave you alone for the first time in twenty-four hours and you’re making mysterious phone calls.”

  “I was calling Cheryl and Jim Ammons. The people in Ellijay with whom I had been staying. I wanted to let them know I was all right.”

  “And you couldn’t wait to do that in the car on my phone?”

  He was still holding her arm. Rosalyn snatched it away. “I didn’t think of that, okay? I’ve been on my own for a while now and I’m not used to having other people around or their resources.”

  Steve’s eyes narrowed more, so she turned and walked out toward the car. Let him believe whatever he wanted to.

  It was going to be a long ride to Colorado Springs.

  * * *

  THE HOURS ON the way to Colorado Springs were tense at best. Rosalyn never told him exactly who she had been contacting, but he didn’t believe her when she said it was the Ammonses, the couple in Ellijay who had taken her in. After all, hadn’t she already told him the husband didn’t trust the government and they lived off the grid?

  No computer, no phone. So how exactly had she called them?

  Steve didn’t want to let it, especially after last night, but true doubt about Rosalyn crept in. He was trained to see evil in innocent actions, to question all possibilities.

  He had to face the fact that Rosalyn could be using him right now. That she had initiated contact with him in Pensacola for a particular purpose that had nothing to do with the baby or the Watcher.

  To what end, he didn’t exactly know. But he had to admit she could be working with some sort of partner to get something from him or maneuver him in some way. Maybe she knew who he really was in Omega. He had access to top secret information on a regular basis. Maybe she was hoping to obtain something through him.

  He just couldn’t get out of his mind how sad she’d looked when getting off the phone. How guilty.

  Like she’d done something distasteful and wished she could take it back.

  Why would she feel that way after talking to a couple she’d been close to for half a year? And for that matter, why wouldn’t she just have used his phone to contact them? It would
’ve made a lot more sense.

  Or was it just like Rosalyn had said? She wasn’t used to depending on other people. She hadn’t had a cell phone in a while. Maybe she hadn’t even considered it. She’d just seen the pay phone—a rarity these days—and decided to make the call while Steve was doing other things.

  Certainly not nefarious when thought of that way.

  Steve’s hands gripped the steering wheel tighter. It wasn’t often that he called his own judgments and gut feelings into question.

  But when it came to Rosalyn, he had to admit that he was not neutral.

  He decided to try to talk to her. They couldn’t spend the rest of the five hours in silence.

  “I’m going to take you into my office. I have people looking into your situation.”

  She nodded. “Okay. You still haven’t told me exactly what you do or who you work for.”

  He didn’t answer. Was it interesting that she would be pressing for info on that topic now or was he just reading into things that weren’t there? He looked over at Rosalyn, her crystal-blue eyes staring at him.

  He’d swear she was guileless. But he couldn’t take the risk. The Critical Response Division wasn’t one of the covert divisions of Omega, but Steve still couldn’t take a chance on giving Rosalyn any information if he suspected she was working with someone.

  God, what a mess that was going to be if she was. Because what if a paternity test proved the baby was his but Rosalyn was really in cahoots with a criminal?

  Complicated was an understatement.

  Chapter Thirteen

  Great. She was trapped in the car with Broody McScary.

  What had happened to the passionate man she’d made love with last night? He been here with her until they’d eaten lunch.

  Maybe he had indigestion.

  No, it wasn’t lunch. It was her phone call. He didn’t like that she’d had a conversation he couldn’t hear. It didn’t take a genius to figure out why.

  He didn’t trust her.

  She didn’t know exactly what bad thing he kept expecting her to do. Hell, she didn’t think he knew what bad thing he expected her to do. But obviously he expected something.