by Lauren Wood
“I think the whole point of being drunk is the reason Colt. Like I said before, that is not like me at all.”
“I have to agree that it was spontaneous, but that doesn't mean that it wasn't right. There had to be a reason that we got married, that we met. I have thought about you a lot through the years.”
“Well I haven't thought about you at all.”
Her words stung, and I could tell that she noticed how rude she was being. It may not have been rude, but definitely short.
“Like I said before, I hate to hear that.”
“Look Colt, I don't know what you think is going on here, but I am just here to get the divorce, so that I can get married to Jax. I am not here for any other reason and I don't want you to think that I am. I want us to be civil toward each other, but we both know that this isn't going to go anywhere. I don't know what I was thinking that night and I don't know why I agreed to marry you, but it happened. And now we have to take care of it, like adults.”
She sounded very sure of herself, but I had to wonder if she really felt that way. I wanted to think that she didn't.
“You might be right Candy, but I would just like the weekend to see. Like I said before, I would never force you to do anything that you didn't want to do. We can just go out, go to a movie or museum or something. It doesn't have to be anything more than that. Did you have something better to do?”
She gave me a dirty look and I figured that I should've said that.
“Yeah, I'm supposed to be on my honeymoon.”
Of everything that she said, that was what hurt the most. The last thing that I wanted to think about was Candy with another man. I still didn’t know why I thought about her and why we’d been drawn together, but I could still feel the same attraction as before. I didn’t know what it was, but there was still something between me and my wife and I was going to figure out what it was before she left. My mind was already on the idea that maybe it was time that we had our own honeymoon. It was a long time coming after all.
“Sorry that I spoiled it for you. I thought that you remembered. I mean, you did have a ring on that night. I found it later in the bed. It must have come off of your finger when we were preoccupied.”
I had brought it with me and I went to my jacket pocket and pulled it out. It was then that I noticed that I didn’t have mine on, but I thought it a bit too presumptuous to put it on now.
When I handed it to her, she looked at it as if it were a bomb. I could tell that it just made it more real for her and I don’t think that it was something she was prepared for.
“You still have it?”
“Yes, I have mine as well, in my box in my room. It felt strange to keep wearing it when you never came back.”
“Why didn’t you come after me? If you felt so strongly about us, about me being your wife? Why would you wait all of this time for me to track you down?”
“Because you told me about Dylan and how he wouldn’t leave you alone. I didn’t want to be like him. I wanted you to be with me because you wanted to be, not because you felt some form of obligation. That was the last thing that I wanted.”
“I told you about Dylan?”
I agreed that she did.
“Oh. I must have been saying way too much. I never talk about him.”
“Not at all. I loved hearing you talk. We were getting to know each other I thought.”
She bit her lower lip and looked away. I would have given anything to have known what was going on in her mind.
“Do you want me to show you to your room? You might be a little tired from the flight and it is rather late.”
She nodded her head and Candy followed me to the bedroom next to mine. I hoped that the close proximity would bring her to me sooner. It was a low chance of working, but I was as optimistic as ever before.
Chapter 8
Candy
“Sorry Colt, I really have to take this.”
“Is it your fiancée?”
He didn’t sound so happy at the prospect of the caller being Jax. When I told him that it was my friend Lisa, it seemed to lower his stress level. I didn’t want him to think that he was getting over on me. There was a big part of me that knew that he was, but I wasn’t ready to admit it yet. I motioned for him to go and he asked me if he would see me again tonight.
“I don’t know. I might grab some more wine in a bit.”
Colt smiled my way and then left down the hallway. He went into one of the adjoining rooms and I closed the door as I went back in. I answered the phone and Lisa asked me where I was.
“You would never guess if I told you.”
“I have a pretty good idea. I talked to Jax a little while ago. He’s been trying to call you.”
“Yeah, I know. I meant to call him back, but I’ve been in the middle of something.”
“And yet you can answer for me?”
“Whose side are you on?”
I was starting to feel a little defensive and I had a feeling that it was because
I was far too worried about what I was doing wrong. I had feelings for my husband that I wasn’t supposed to have and the mention of Jax, reminded me that I was wrong to feel this way.
“I am not on anyone’s side. I just don't know where your head is right now. Jax told me that you went to go see him, but that can’t be true, right?”
I should have been happy to hear from my oldest and dearest friend, but I can't really say that it was that way at the moment. I didn't want to talk to her about Jax, I wanted to talk to her about Colt and what was going on here, how I was feeling. I realized then that I couldn't. While she said she hadn't picked a side, it was quite clear that she had, and it wasn’t my side that she had chosen.
I wanted to tell her about the fact that I had to be here and that was the only reason, even if it wasn't the truth. But the fact of the matter was that I knew for some reason that she would go back to Jax to tell him. I didn't want him knowing that I had lied to him. I had known that it would be a bad idea, but I wasn't able to come out with it before.
“Yeah Lisa, I am just here long as I have to be. I need to get him to sign the papers so that the divorce will be final. It is the only way that is going to happen before Christmas.”
“What a mess Candy.”
“I can't say that I disagree with you. I sort of wish that I never would've went to that Bachelorette party. Or if I would of went, I wish you would've been there too. You would have kept me from doing something stupid like this.”
“I don't know about that, but at least I would've been right there next to you. At least we would have remembered the next day if nothing else.”
I smile to myself and was relieved that she was back to being my friend, and not another inquisitor for Jax. I’d talked to a lot of those in the last week since the wedding.
“So, I have to talk him into signing papers.”
“What is he like?”
“I don't know. He seems nice enough, a lawyer. I don't really know him all that well, and I don't even remember him from before. It was just a crazy night that when a little too far. It should be a crime to have so many little chapels to get married around here. They know that everyone is here to party, so anything that happens here, shouldn't be pushed. It has been so long that I can't get it annulled, so we have to do it this way.”
“I wish you would've told me because I would've come with you. I've never been to Vegas before.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, something always came up. I'm starting to think that maybe it was a good thing that I didn’t go with you for that one.”
We talked for a little while longer and I hung up with mixed feelings. It had been good to hear from her, but at the same time, I still had a lot weighing on my shoulders that I couldn't share with anyone, not even her. That bothered me.
I went back downstairs to the kitchen to get another glass of wine. Talking to Lisa had me thinking about Jax and the real reason that I was here. I shouldn’t have
needed that boost, but apparently, I did, because I only started to feel better when I realized that I was going to figure it out. I had been momentarily sidetracked, that’s all.
“So how is your friend?”
“She is good. I left pretty quickly, and I didn't get to say goodbye to anyone. We had some plans for this weekend that I forgot about.”
“I am glad you are here Candy. It really is good to see you after all this time.”
I didn't get where he was coming from and I was trying to understand. His house was beautiful and huge. He had a driver, butler and most likely a maid as well. Colt with handsome and it was easy to imagine that he had plenty of women at his beck and call. It made no sense why he was holding on to this between us. It had happened so long ago, I just didn't understand it.
“Why have you missed me? We were only together one night.”
“Well, I think we actually went to bed around five or six in the morning. By the time I woke up it was afternoon and you had left. So, it was more like one night and early morning. And to answer your question, I don't know why I miss you. I don't know why I have thought about you all these years, even though you never showed back up. I don't know why I never divorced you. I mean sure, I had no desire to get married again, so it wasn't really an issue, but I should have. I've made a lot of money since we got married and if you were the certain type of person, you could take it all. So, it made no sense for me to keep things the same. But I did, and I don't know why.”
When he talked like that, I wasn't sure how to react. He talked about us in a sense that we were meant to be together or fated in some way, but I didn't believe in fate. I never had and certainly wouldn’t have believed it with him.
I believe that people made their own fate and even though I thought that what me and Jax had together was perfect. I knew in the end that was because we made it that way, not because of any pre-destined life that we had.
“I don't know why you haven't forgotten me either. I think it's the red hair. It's such a strange color that it just sticks out with people. Most people don't remember my name, but they remember my hair. Silly huh?”
I was babbling for the simple fact that I didn't know what to say and looking at him was impossible, and I had to turn away.
“I remembered more than your hair Candy. With a name like that I don't know how anyone could forget it.”
My name has been forgotten many times and it was more of an insult to injury because of how easy it was to remember. Before Jax, I started to think that I was never going to find the one that I was looking for. My true love.
“I have to admit, you do have a good memory. You even remember what I told you about Dylan. It's kind of funny though, I realize now that Dylan was small potatoes. I can see now that I was naïve to think that it was going to be the worst thing that happened to me.”
“What about the man you have now? The one that you were about to marry? Is he the one for you?”
I felt like I had to justify Jax, and I didn't like the feeling at all. While Jax was perfect, he did have his faults as well. We all did. Perfection was not always perfect, it was a feeling and knowing that no matter what, it didn't matter.
“I think that he is the one for me.”
Chapter 9
Colt
I, of course, didn't believe it to be true. How could she be meant for another man, when I still strongly felt that she was the one for me? Whatever the reason was for us coming together, was still there. I was still drawn to her in a way that I hadn't experienced before, and I was still trying to convince her of it. There was a little bit of frustration in the fact that she didn't feel the same way. It would have made things so much easier.
“And how does he feel about you being here?”
He is fine with it. He trusts me. He knows that whatever it is between us, is nothing that compares to what is between me and him.”
“You sound like you're trying to convince yourself, more than me.”
I was baiting her a little bit because I wanted to get her riled up. I wanted to see the emotions and the woman that I knew from before. She wouldn’t let me talk to her that way and it didn't take long for Candy do the same. While she liked to think that she wasn't that girl anymore, it wouldn't be long until she was.
“I don't have to convince myself of anything Colt. If you didn't have such a huge ego, maybe you would see what is right in front of your face. I am not delusional one. I know exactly where the two of us stand, but you don’t seem to.”
That stung a little bit and I have to say that it made me smile as well. This was well more familiar with the woman that I had first came in contact with. The one I’d met at the airport was far too uppity and far too proper. The Candy I remember was not proper at all.
I notice that her bottle of wine was almost empty, and I asked her she wanted something else to drink. I wasn’t trying to get her liquored up, but the idea of something to dull her tongue wasn’t the worst idea I’d ever had.
“Do you have any more wine?”
“I do downstairs. Do you want to come down to the cellar with me and we can pick one out?”
Candy told me that she didn't like the sound of that at all.
“I am not going down into a cellar with you or any other stranger. I think there is a poem about that. It does not end well.”
She made me laugh and I just shook my head. Of course, you would see it as a way to get herself in danger. I was trying to get alone time with her and I did like the idea of taking her into the dark damp place. But I certainly wasn't thinking about hurting her. I was thinking more about how good it would feel to hear her scream for mercy again. She had a way of saying my name that still made me shiver when I thought about it and that was all I was thinking about. Nothing to do with an Edgar Allan Poe poem.
“Well, all I have up here is some whiskey and some vodka you turned down before. Do you want me to go down there and get some myself?”
“No, vodka will be fine.”
She said it in an offhanded way and I was smiling inside. Maybe we would get the old Candy that I remembered so well back a lot quicker. I went to the cabinet and got her a glass. All I could think about was what was going to happen next. All of a sudden there was optimism again.
***
A few drinks later and Candy was getting hot. It was much like it had been at the bar when I’d first met her. When she started drinking, it seemed like there was an inferno burning inside of her. She took off her outer shirt, leaving only a little tank top left on, and it was getting my attention. If it was any other woman I would think that she was doing it on purpose, but I knew that Candy wasn't.
She's actually doing the opposite, leaving her hair up in a bun on top of her head and wearing no makeup. She had not been dressed to impress. If anything, she was dressed as uncomplimentary as she could be. It was done in such a way that it had to be on purpose. I knew that the hotter she got, the more she would want to take off your clothes.
When she went towards her pants, I knew that I had to draw the line. We had matched a few shots, but she was a lot smaller than me and it didn't appear like she was used to it as I was.
“I think you might want to leave those on Candy.”
She finally looked at me and asked me why. The problem was that I was dumb. Why the hell was I trying to get her to keep her pants on? Wasn't the whole point of this to get into her pants?
“I'm hot, Colt. If you would turn down the heat, I wouldn't have to do this.”
“The air conditioner has been nonstop for the last hour. I'm starting to get frostbite over here, so I think it is just you. I think you need to slow down on the vodka.”
She agreed, at the same time she took a gulp of the rest of the clear liquid in the glass. I had to move the bottle away from her and I started some coffee. What was once friendly conversation, was now something else altogether. At the moment, I just felt like I was being massively teased and she didn’t even know it.
�
�Why don’t I help you to your room so that you can sleep it off? I don’t think that coffee is going to help you right now.”
She smiled at me and told me that I was such a gentleman, but the truth was that she really had no idea. The fact of the matter was that I was doing this for my own survival. I wanted to be with her so badly and if she took off any more clothing off, I wasn’t going to be able to handle myself. It wasn’t going to be good if I lost my cool, so I was trying very hard not to. That meant, that I had to get her the hell away from me and in bed was the most obvious place to dump her. There she wouldn’t be calling to me like a woman that I couldn’t have.
“No, I am really not that tired yet. I wanted to stay up for a while, drink some more.”
I told her that it wasn’t a good idea and even though she said she wasn’t tired, the last thing that she needed to do was to drink a little bit more. She’d had enough. It was already hard to understand her because she was slurring her words so well and I just shook my head. What the hell was I doing? I should have done something more to push us closer to the direction that I wanted us to be in.
“Do you really think I should go to sleep? Am I embarrassing myself Colt?”
“No, not at all.”
“Then why are you taking me upstairs?”
“Because I can’t keep watching you dance around, taking your clothes off and still be a gentleman. You have to see that, right?”
She agreed but I could tell that she was rather shocked by my words. I hadn’t meant to say it like that, but she was so close, and I was breathing in her perfume. It was certainly a bad thing for me because I was already on the edge of all reason. She was driving me crazy by just being there and there wasn’t much that I could say or do to stop it. I just had to focus on getting her to the bedroom, so that I could breathe again. How different this was playing out.
