The Emerald City of Oz

by L. Frank Baum

  _How_ DOROTHY LUNCHED WITH A KING

  CHAPTER TWENTY

  A line of rabbit soldiers was drawn up before the palace entrance, andthey wore green and gold uniforms with high shakos upon their heads andheld tiny spears in their hands. The Captain had a sword and a whiteplume in his shako.

  "Salute!" cried the Keeper of the Wicket. "Salute Princess Dorothy, whocomes from Ozma of Oz!"

  "Salute!" yelled the Captain, and all the soldiers promptly saluted.

  They now entered the great hall of the palace, where they met a gailydressed attendant, from whom the Keeper of the Wicket inquired if theKing were at leisure.

  "I think so," was the reply. "I heard his Majesty blubbering and wailingas usual only a few minutes ago. If he doesn't stop acting like acry-baby I'm going to resign my position here and go to work."

  "What's the matter with your King?" asked Dorothy, surprised to hear therabbit attendant speak so disrespectfully of his monarch.

  "Oh, he doesn't want to be King, that's all; and he simply _has_ to,"was the reply.

  "Come!" said the Keeper of the Wicket, sternly; "lead us to his Majesty;and do not air our troubles before strangers, I beg of you."

  "Why, if this girl is going to see the King, he'll air his owntroubles," returned the attendant.

  "That is his royal privilege," declared the Keeper.

  So the attendant led them into a room all draped with cloth-of-gold andfurnished with satin-covered gold furniture. There was a throne in thisroom, set on a dais and having a big cushioned seat, and on this seatreclined the Rabbit King. He was lying on his back, with his paws in theair, and whining very like a puppy-dog.

  "Your Majesty! your Majesty! Get up. Here's a visitor," called out theattendant.

  The King rolled over and looked at Dorothy with one watery pink eye.Then he sat up and wiped his eyes carefully with a silk handkerchief andput on his jeweled crown, which had fallen off.

  "Excuse my grief, fair stranger," he said, in a sad voice. "You beholdin me the most miserable monarch in all the world. What time is it,Blinkem?"

  "One o'clock, your Majesty," replied the attendant to whom the questionwas addressed.

  "Serve luncheon at once!" commanded the King. "Luncheon for two--that'sfor my visitor and me--and see that the human has some sort of foodshe's accustomed to."

  "Yes, your Majesty," answered the attendant, and went away.

  "Tie my shoe, Bristle," said the King to the Keeper of the Wicket. "Ah,me! how unhappy I am!"

  "What seems to be worrying your Majesty?" asked Dorothy.

  "Why, it's this king business, of course," he returned, while the Keepertied his shoe. "I didn't want to be King of Bunnybury at all, and therabbits all knew it. So they elected me--to save themselves from such adreadful fate, I suppose--and here I am, shut up in a palace, when Imight be free and happy."

  "Seems to me," said Dorothy, "it's a great thing to be a King."

  "Were you ever a King?" inquired the monarch.

  "No," she answered, laughing.

  "Then you know nothing about it," he said. "I haven't inquired who youare, but it doesn't matter. While we're at luncheon, I'll tell you allmy troubles. They're a great deal more interesting than anything you cansay about yourself."

  "Perhaps they are, to you," replied Dorothy.

  "Luncheon is served!" cried Blinkem, throwing open the door, and in camea dozen rabbits in livery, all bearing trays which they placed upon thetable, where they arranged the dishes in an orderly manner.

  "Now clear out--all of you!" exclaimed the King. "Bristle, you may waitoutside, in case I want you."

  When they had gone and the King was alone with Dorothy he came down fromhis throne, tossed his crown into a corner and kicked his ermine robeunder the table.

  "Sit down," he said, "and try to be happy. It's useless for me to try,because I'm always wretched and miserable. But I'm hungry, and I hopeyou are."

  "I am," said Dorothy. "I've only eaten a wheelbarrow and a pianoto-day--oh, yes! and a slice of bread and butter that used to be adoor-mat."

  "That sounds like a square meal," remarked the King, seating himselfopposite her; "but perhaps it wasn't a square piano. Eh?"

  Dorothy laughed.

  "You don't seem so very unhappy now," she said.

  "But I am," protested the King, fresh tears gathering in his eyes. "Evenmy jokes are miserable. I'm wretched, woeful, afflicted, distressed anddismal as an individual can be. Are you not sorry for me?"

  "No," answered Dorothy, honestly, "I can't say I am. Seems to me thatfor a rabbit you 're right in clover. This is the prettiest little cityI ever saw."

  "Oh, the city is good enough," he admitted. "Glinda, the Good Sorceress,made it for us because she was fond of rabbits. I don't mind the City somuch, although I wouldn't live here if I had my choice. It is being Kingthat has absolutely ruined my happiness."

  "Why wouldn't you live here by choice?" she asked.

  "Because it is all unnatural, my dear. Rabbits are out of place in suchluxury. When I was young I lived in a burrow in the forest. I wassurrounded by enemies and often had to run for my life. It was hardgetting enough to eat, at times, and when I found a bunch of clover Ihad to listen and look for danger while I ate it. Wolves prowled aroundthe hole in which I lived and sometimes I didn't dare stir out for daysat a time. Oh, how happy and contented I was then! I was a real rabbit,as nature made me--wild and free!--and I even enjoyed listening to thestartled throbbing of my own heart!"

  "I've often thought," said Dorothy, who was busily eating, "that itwould be fun to be a rabbit."

  "It _is_ fun--when you're the genuine article," agreed his Majesty. "Butlook at me now! I live in a marble palace instead of a hole in theground. I have all I want to eat, without the joy of hunting for it.Every day I must dress in fine clothes and wear that horrible crown tillit makes my head ache. Rabbits come to me with all sorts of troubles,when my own troubles are the only ones I care about. When I walk out Ican't hop and run; I must strut on my rear legs and wear an ermine robe!And the soldiers salute me and the band plays and the other rabbitslaugh and clap their paws and cry out: 'Hail to the King!' Now let meask you, as a friend and a young lady of good judgment: isn't all thispomp and foolishness enough to make a decent rabbit miserable?"

  "Once," said Dorothy, reflectively, "men were wild and unclothed andlived in caves and hunted for food as wild beasts do. But they gotciv'lized, in time, and now they'd hate to go back to the old days."

  "That is an entirely different case," replied the King. "None of youHumans were civilized in one lifetime. It came to you by degrees. But Ihave known the forest and the free life, and that is why I resent beingcivilized all at once, against my will, and being made a King with acrown and an ermine robe. Pah!"

  "If you don't like it, why don't you resign?" she asked.

  "Impossible!" wailed the Rabbit, wiping his eyes again with hishandkerchief. "There's a beastly law in this town that forbids it. Whenone is elected a King there's no getting out of it."

  "Who made the laws?" inquired Dorothy.

  "The same Sorceress who made the town--Glinda the Good. She built thewall, and fixed up the City, and gave us several valuable enchantments,and made the laws. Then she invited all the pink-eyed white rabbits ofthe forest to come here, after which she left us to our fate."

  "What made you 'cept the invitation, and come here?" asked the child.

  "I didn't know how dreadful city life was, and I'd no idea I would beelected King," said he, sobbing bitterly. "And--and--now I'm It--with acapital I--and can't escape!"

  "I know Glinda," remarked Dorothy, eating for dessert a dish ofcharlotte russe, "and when I see her again I'll ask her to put anotherKing in your place."

  "Will you? Will you, indeed?" asked the King, joyfully.

  "I will if you want me to," she replied.

  "Hurroo--hurray!" shouted the King; and then he jumped up from the tableand danced wildly about the room, waving his napkin like a flag andl
aughing with glee.

  After a time he managed to control his delight and returned to thetable.

  "When are you likely to see Glinda?" he inquired.

  "Oh, p'raps in a few days," said Dorothy.

  "And you won't forget to ask her?"

  "Of course not."

  "Princess," said the Rabbit King, earnestly, "you have relieved me of agreat unhappiness, and I am very grateful. Therefore I propose toentertain you, since you are my guest and I am the King, as a slightmark of my appreciation. Come with me to my reception hall."

  He then summoned Bristle and said to him: "Assemble all the nobility inthe great reception hall, and also tell Blinkem that I want himimmediately."

  The Keeper of the Wicket bowed and hurried away, and his Majesty turnedto Dorothy and continued: "We'll have time for a walk in the gardensbefore the people get here."

  The gardens were back of the palace and were filled with beautifulflowers and fragrant shrubs, with many shade and fruit trees and marblepaved walks running in every direction. As they entered this placeBlinkem came running to the King, who gave him several orders in a lowvoice. Then his Majesty rejoined Dorothy and led her through thegardens, which she admired very much.

  "What lovely clothes your Majesty wears!" she said, glancing at the richblue satin costume, embroidered with pearls, in which the King wasdressed.

  "Yes," he returned, with an air of pride, "this is one of my favoritesuits; but I have a good many that are even more elaborate. We haveexcellent tailors in Bunnybury, and Glinda supplies all the material. Bythe way, you might ask the Sorceress, when you see her, to permit me tokeep my wardrobe."

  "But if you go back to the forest you will not need clothes," she said.

  "N--o!" he faltered; "that may be so. But I've dressed up so long thatI'm used to it, and I don't imagine I'd care to run around naked again.So perhaps the Good Glinda will let me keep the costumes."

  "I'll ask her," agreed Dorothy.

  Then they left the gardens and went into a fine big reception hall,where rich rugs were spread upon the tiled floors and the furniture wasexquisitely carved and studded with jewels. The King's chair was anespecially pretty piece of furniture, being in the shape of a silverlily with one leaf bent over to form the seat. The silver waseverywhere thickly encrusted with diamonds and the seat was upholsteredin white satin.

  "Oh, what a splendid chair!" cried Dorothy, clasping her handsadmiringly.

  "Isn't it?" answered the King, proudly. "It is my favorite seat, and Ithink it especially becoming to my complexion. While I think of it, Iwish you'd ask Glinda to let me keep this lily chair when I go away."

  "It wouldn't look very well in a hole in the ground, would it?" shesuggested.

  "Maybe not; but I'm used to sitting in it and I'd like to take it withme," he answered. "But here come the ladies and gentlemen of the court;so please sit beside me and be presented."