Breathe Again
Page 4
Nothing about here is easy. What it is, though, is real. It’s gritty, it’s hard, and it’s all-consuming. If you can live here, you can live anywhere. Mark my words.
I know she could walk away at any moment, but Melanie would never. Even if she should run and not look back, that’s not who she is. It’s not who we are together.
We are forever friends, through thick and thin. The type of friends who you could talk to once every six months and pick up right where you left off. Though, in reality, we may go weeks without speaking due to work, but we have never gone more than a month at the most. She is my soul sister, and I am hers.
A few years ago, Melanie took an internship at a mid-sized literary agency, and I took off to write a story that would rock the world. I gave her, A View from Home, a novel about the foster care system in our country, and she went over the head of the man she worked for who said, “It wasn’t good enough” and emailed it to a company contact at Random House Publishing, where they not only bought the book, but hired her that day.
She became a junior editor at Random House, and I became a novelist. She became a senior editor when my first book put me on the New York Times Bestseller list. The subsequent three novels hit the list as well. Acclaimed awards, Wall Street Journal, and we were both riding a high of dreams coming true.
I can hear as she taps her long fingernails on her glass top desk, and then I hear the bell go off inside her head.
“Raw.”
“I’m giving you raw. I’m giving you real. I am giving you what people go through every day,” I tell her, trying to keep my annoyance at bay. After all, she is trying to help me.
“The market has shifted, Tatum. What’s selling is not this.”
I hear a thud and am certain it’s the manuscript I sent her. She prefers e-mail; I don’t.
“Then I’ll self-publish,” I threaten, and she audibly hisses into the phone, saying nothing.
This is new territory for us both. I love Melanie. I love working with her. Unlike the horror stories I hear about publishers washing out an author’s voice in edits, she doesn’t do that to my work.
“You still there?” I ask.
“I am,” she says firmly then pauses. I hear a door shut, then her heels click across the floor before she sighs out, “Please, Tatum. Please give me something that will blow the roof off this place. I know you have it in you. I know you do. Just let it happen.”
“Do you need this, Melanie?” I ask, wondering why she suddenly wants to mold my work into a completely different realm than I have ever written.
“Yes. Yes, I do. We both do.”
I sigh, feeling the weight of her world and my own landing firmly on my shoulders. “Okay, give me two months.”
“One,” she says, her edge returning.
“You have to push, don’t you?” I half-laugh.
“You taught me how,” she returns with a smile in her voice.
“Talk later.” I start to end the call.
“Wait! It has to be hot, Tatum. I need your voice, but bring the damn heat.”
“Melanie …”
“You’re gonna need to put yourself out there.”
“Meaning?” I have no idea why I ask when I know damn well what she is getting at.
“When’s the last time you actually got your peach plucked?”
“That’s none of your business,” I say with no intention of answering her, especially when she uses words like “peach plucked.” That’s up there with “moist” in words I would rather not use or hear reference to in sexual situations.
“You need to go find yourself a sexy, suit-wearing mogul,” she suggests.
“I’m in Detroit, Mel.” I sigh. “Remember, I was going to show the times in Motor City. A whole look back and look forward.”
I hear her nails tapping her keyboard. I know damn well she’s googling where to find the perfect place for inspiration.
“Get your ass to Texas.”
“I’m here for a month.” I stand with my phone in my hand, looking out the hotel window at what I know from pictures was once a beautiful city.
The river is mucky, the boats decrepit, and the cracked sidewalks once were beautiful. Detroit was something a long time ago.
“Right,” she sighs. “You can’t change your plans for the eye candy and your best friend?”
I laugh. “Melanie, this is all set up. Money spent, timelines sorted. I’m willing to think outside the box and shift my focus, but I can’t uproot my plans and still feel like I’m not insane.”
“Okay, okay,” she concedes.
“Goodnight, Melanie.”
“Goodnight, Tatum,” she says with a softness in her tone that is without a doubt caused by the stress I just alleviated.
Hers is gone, and mine has returned. Yin and yang. Night and day. We are never on the same page, but the balance is and always has been there.
I sit down on the chair next to the small table by the window, grab the glass of sweet red wine I had just poured, and take a drink. It’s sweet, crisp and, God willing, it will help me sleep tonight.
I drink the entire glass, and then pour another before reaching across the table to grab the manila folder and drag it closer to me. I look through the pictures from the 1950s: the new buildings, the finely-dressed people on the streets, the cars. The streets were full of them, all shiny and new. Detroit used to be spectacular. I know it was; the proof is in the pictures. But it is not anymore.
All that glitters does not always remain gold.
All that once was beautiful doesn’t remain so.
All that was lost will not necessarily be found.
Time does not stand still.
I stand up and stretch my neck as I walk over and grab my laptop, carrying it back to the table and opening it up. Then I click on the new document and title it: Mommy Porn.
“To new beginnings,” I toast the air then take a sip.
There is a saying in the writing industry: “write drunk and edit sober.” I guess I will give it a try tonight.
Sweet Jesus, am I really going to do this?
For Melanie, I will.
Read the rest…
Get Use Me
About MJ Fields
USA Today bestselling author MJ Fields write books that scorch pages and melt hearts. Her style is raw, gritty and authentic. Love an alpha and a strong heroine? She does too.
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Other Books
The Men of Steel Series
Forever Steel
Jase
Jase and Carly
Cyrus
Zandor
Xavier
Forever Family
Family
Momma Joe
The Ties of Steel Series
Abe
Dominic
Eroe
Sabato
The Rockers of Steel Series
Memphis Black (Memphis and Tallia)
Finn Beckett (Finn and Sonia)
River James (River and Kianna)
Billy Jeffers (Billy and Madison)
LRAH Legacy Series (These families’ stories are intertwined starting with The Love series, they move to the Wrapped Series, the Burning Souls series, and end in Love You Anyways.
Many more series will spin off from these characters already written and each will be a standalone series but for those of us who love a story to continue I recommend reading in this order.
The Love Series
(Must Be Read In This Order)
Blue Love
New Love
Sad Love
True Love
The Wrapped Series
Wrapped In Silk
Wrapped In Armor
Wrapped In Always and Forever
Burning Souls Series
Stained
Forged
Merged
LRAH Legacy Additions
Love You Anyway
Love Notes
The Truth About Love Series
27 Truths (Ava’s Story)
27 Lies (Luke’s Story)
The Norfolk Series
Irons (Jaxson and Frankie, book 1)
Shadows (Shadows and Mary, book 2)
Titan (Coming 2017)
UnSocial Daters Club: Matched Duet
Match This!
ImPerfectly Matched!
Published with Loveswept/Penguin Random House
The Caldwell Brothers Series
(co-written w/ Chelsea Camaron)
Hendrix
Morrison
Jagger
Standalones
Visibly Broken
(co-written w/ Chelsea Camaron)
Offensive Rebound
About Chelsea Camaron
USA Today bestselling author Chelsea Camaron is a small town Carolina girl with a big imagination. She’s a wife and mom, chasing her dreams. She writes contemporary romance, erotic suspense, and psychological thrillers. She loves to write about blue-collar men who have real problems with a fictional twist. From mechanics to bikers to oil riggers to smokejumpers, bar owners, and beyond she loves a strong hero who works hard and plays harder.
Chelsea can be found on social media at
Facebook: www.facebook.com/authorchelseacamaron
Twitter: @chelseacamaron
Instagram: @chelseacamaron
Website: www.authorchelseacamaron.com
Email chelseacamaron@gmail.com
Other works by Chelsea Camaron
Love and Repair Series:
Crash and Burn
Restore My Heart
Salvaged
Full Throttle
Beyond Repair
Stalled
Box Set Available
Hellions Ride Series:
One Ride
Forever Ride
Merciless Ride
Eternal Ride
Innocent Ride
Simple Ride
Heated Ride
Ride with Me (Hellions MC and Ravage MC Duel with Ryan Michele)
Originals Ride
Final Ride
Roughneck Series:
Maverick
Heath
Lance
Box Set Available
Stand Alone Thriller – Stay
Stand Alone Short Romance – Serving My Soldier
Mother Trucker
Devil’s Due MC Series:
Crossover
In The Red
Below The Line
Close The Tab
The following series are co-written
The Fire Inside Series:
(co-written by Theresa Marguerite Hewitt)
Kale
Regulators MC Series:
(co-written by Jessie Lane)
Ice
Hammer
Coal
Summer of Sin Series
Original Sin (co-written with Ripp Baker, Daryl Banner, Angelica Chase, MJ Fields, MX King)
Caldwell Brothers Series
(co-written by USA Today Bestselling Author MJ Fields)
Hendrix
Morrison
Jagger
Stand Alone Romance – (co-written with MJ Fields)
Visibly Broken
Use Me
Ruthless Rebels MC Series – (co-written with Ryan Michele)
Shamed
Scorned
Scarred
Schooled