Danika

by Varsha Dixit

  Dr. Noah gazed at the envelope and then at the box. “Is this all?” Noah asked his voice hoarse. “Alicia was here for nearly two years.”

  “Yes, this is all. Miss Alicia never collected much. She just liked to give. Most of the things in the box are trinkets, bracelets and paintings that the women she worked with made for her.”

  Noah got to his feet with the slowness of an eighty year old with chronic arthritis. He reached out to take the envelope from Lala but then hesitated. “Are you sure Alicia is. . .” Noah swallowed, ”gone?”

  Lala grabbed Noah’s hand. “There were no survivors. The convoy was ambushed and bombed. Everyone died in that ambush.” He shook his head. “The jewelry in the envelope is hers, all that is left of your... of Miss Alicia. The gold necklace you gave her. She never took it off!” Inhaling deeply, Lala gave Noah’s hand a gentle squeeze and then stepped back. “She is gone Doctor. Miss Alicia is in heaven. She spoke so much about you. Her gray eyes would light up-”

  Noah did not wait for Lala to finish. He went around the tall Afghani and picked up the box. “Thank you.” He took slow steps to the door of the office that opened into a narrow alley. Noah paused at the door. “Will you write to me if you remember anything about her?”

  “Yes, of course, my friend. Miss Alicia will always live in our hearts as most cherished. I will pray for you.”

  Noah could only bring himself to nod. Talking exhausted him. He stepped out of the dusty office into a dustier street. The hot setting sun bathed everything in hues of orange and gold. Sounds of street vendors, peeling sounds of bicycle bells, car horns and local radio station music made for a noisy environment ripe with smells and sights. Yet it did not dent the bleakness on Noah's face. His gait was slow and his shoulders slumped as if breaking under the weight of whatever he carried inside.

  A blue car that appeared to be on its last set of wheels waited at the end of the road. Getting inside, Noah sat back and rested his head on the seat. The old driver turned the key, not saying a word.

  Noah raised the window with the squeaking silver handle that moaned at every turn. He opened the envelope Lala had handed him and took out the necklace with a simple gold and diamond heart on a delicate gold chain. The metal was colder than his skin. He gripped his fingers around the heart till it bit into his fingers. Noah was hoping to feel Alicia's warmth on it. He was disappointed.

  The tears held back for so many days finally trickled down his cheeks, scalding them. The driver afforded Noah some privacy by hunching further over the wheel.

  Noah was beyond the point of caring. A dam of emotions burst in him. He covered his face with his hands and sobbed noisily. He was crying for the future he would never have with his young wife. His first love, his childhood sweetheart, Alicia.

  Noah felt like someone had taken a box cutter to his heart and shredded it to ribbons even though he knew better as a cardiologist. But one thing Noah was sure about, he would never love again.

  It hurts too damn much!

  Chapter 4

  Two years later

  October 10, 2017

  Downtown Philadelphia

  The chilly October wind coming through the back door did nothing to cool the resentment that singed Danika from her head to the sole of her sensible work shoes.

  Danika's mouth twisted all the way to the side of her face as she stomped to her desk that was littered with small colorful souvenirs. Her face, usually as calm as the surface of a forgotten lake, trembled with a deep-seated rage. She took a seat and bent over her desk, taking refuge behind the two 18-inch monitors there. She knotted her hands in her fleece jacket fighting the urge to break something.

  An older lady with a top knot, wearing a loose red and white wool dress, popped by Danika's desk- Ms. Sarah Silver. Sarah was the front desk receptionist and mother hen to the eclectic seventeen that worked in the advertising agency. “You okay, love?”

  “I have been better!” Danika bit her lips to control her panic.

  “Look at those three!”

  Danika turned her head and saw the faces pressed against the glass wall of the break room that was close to her desk– her three musketeers. Sweet Jenna, crazy Caleb and the very mercurial Shanti! The three wore similar expressions of worry.

  Danika's smile was glum as she mouthed. “Fired!”

  Since the last two weeks there had been hushed whispers in the office that soon someone from the designing department was going to get the fired or worse still, the entire team would be laid off. Just for the heck of it, a couple of days ago, Jenna, Caleb, Shanti and Danika had played the game 'drawing straws'. Danika had eagerly drawn the first, hoping to win but she hadn't.

  “Shoot!” She had exclaimed staring at the short, fluorescent green plastic tube in her hand. She had immediately proposed ‘best out of three’ but the rest of the drawees had disappeared faster than candy in a child's mouth.

  Danika raised troubled eyes at Sarah who was still hovering near her desk. “It’s all over!”

  “Lets go to the supply room! You need boxes to pack your stuff?” Ms. Silver patted Danika’s shoulder.

  The supply room was actually a walk-in closet, a favorite place to stuff a wide spectrum of unwanted things. From coins of other countries to used condoms, all had been discovered in the 'supply room'.

  Danika gladly took the older woman's offer to remove herself from all the sideway glances directed at her.

  Fifteen minutes later, holding a cardboard box full of her paraphernalia, Danika walked out of the shiny glass door; the place where she had literally spent all her waking hours for the last two years. The contents of the box seemed to mock her for spending innumerable hours at work and doing nothing much besides that.

  I will have to get another job ASAP. Any job!

  Danika recalled her meager bank balance that could go into overdraft any day.

  Danika felt like collapsing on the pavement next to the red water hydrant often toppled by careless drivers and peed on by dogs. She felt as kicked as the red cylindrical object right now.

  This is all I had. I gave it my all. Asshole Craig and his fuck buddy Kelly Connor! May they rot in hell!

  Danika clamped her quivering lips, a telltale sign of impending waterworks. She had forbidden her friends from walking her to the car for Danika knew that she could stay composed for only so long.

  Craig Hutchinson, the 'CEO', and his slimy Director Kelly Connor, who were known to be sleeping together in spite of being married to other people, had stolen Danika's concept and jingles twice before but Danika hadn’t protested much. She had tagged it as 'taking a few for the team'.

  However, this time Craig and Kelly had not been satisfied with just stealing Danika's concept they had gone after her job and fired Danika citing ‘poor performance’. All because of the big fat commission attached to the project- commission that would have come Danika's way. Money she desperately needed for a luxury she had prematurely treated herself to – a spanking new car.

  At the end of the block of 1400 Broadway, Danika turned left and entered a covered three-floor parking structure that smelled strongly of urine and greasy food.

  Danika stopped next to her month-old red, shiny car - her only treat to herself in the last twenty seven years. Her anxious dark gaze and the nervous tic at the base of her throat were the only outward signs of the tension swirling in her.

  Dropping the box onto the passenger side seat, Danika leaned against the car. Her mind still grappling with what had just happened. Her cell beeped indicating she had received a new text. Danika feverishly reached inside her purse to find it.

  Maybe it’s Craig texting to apologize, to call me back. Please call me back.

  Unlocking her cell, she saw the thumbnail of a picture along with the text. Danika recognized the number and turned as still as a statue. She felt cold all over like someone had dunked her in icy water.

  Chapter 5

  Don't do it, Dani. Don't do it! Danika’s conscience screamed
at her but Danika couldn't help herself. Her hands shook yet she opened the text and the image popped up.

  It was Piyush and Shazia leaning into each other sporting wide smiles with The Eiffel Tower framed behind them. Danika read the text at the bottom of the picture and felt like someone had landed her a hard kick in her solar plexus. 'First day of Honeymoon!! Will remember 10th October for different reasons now. Suck it! Piyush.'

  Danika kept staring at the picture until it became blurry. Something fell on her cell with a soft 'plop'. Danika jerked her head and wiped her tears. Fresh betrayal struck her in the spot that had just started healing; straight to the left of her chest.

  A homeless woman in mismatched clothes and shoes several sizes bigger hobbled in front of Danika’s car. The woman’s hair was stringy, her face and hand stained with dirt. The woman’s gait was slow. She seemed like hadn’t eaten or taken a bath in days.

  Things could always get worse!

  Blowing her nose in a tissue, Danika reached inside her car grabbed the box of her two years worth of collectibles which included ramen soup, cereal bar boxes, ibuprofen, sanitary napkins, a Ziploc full of loose change and a collection of lip balms among other odd things. She was only surprised that she did not have a bed in that box for she had spent innumerable hours in the brownstone building. Danika walked over to the homeless woman and stopped in front of her. “Excuse me! Here, you can have this.” She thrust the box in the surprised woman’s hands and walked back to her car.

  Danika got in, reversed the car her tires squealing. Her insides burned much like the tires on the concrete. She drove the car out of the parking garage. She had to wipe her eyes with the back of her hand.

  Why do I mean so little to so many?

  The downtown traffic was heavy at this time of the day. In fact, it was heavy at any time of the day. A white and green cab fell behind Danika. Obviously she wasn't driving fast enough for the cab driver or the cab driver had forgotten that one of his hands was pressing the car horn.

  Danika was one such driver who could be easily labeled as ‘lane-sane' or 'happy-at-thirty'. Today however, rankled by the persistent horns, Danika decided to shake things up a little and pressed her foot on the accelerator. The shiny red car jumped.

  Danika wiped her eyes and nose repeatedly using her elbows to keep the wheel straight. Drunk driving is not the only kind of bad driving. Emotional driving too can be quite damaging! Danika was just about to learn that first hand.

  “Dammit!” Danika tried to stretch the three-fourth sleeve of her blouse further. Her eyes kept skittering between the traffic in the front and the overhead traffic lights. Faces of Craig, Kelly, Piyush and Shazia kept swirling unstoppable in front of Danika like some horror film hologram.

  Left to right, left to right, round and round. To a point their faces merged into one ugly cruel face.

  The face of my luck!

  Danika whimpered.

  Chapter 6

  Noah rubbed his overnight stubble as he maneuvered his rental car past a tour bus lurching on a narrow street. Philadelphia afternoon wasn't much different from a Baltimore afternoon; dreary, polluted and gray!

  Here he was, thousands of miles from a city he had lived in since birth. Noah’s move was the doing of his therapist and college friend, Dr. Lana Singh.

  “You need a damn change of place ASAP Noah! Keeping the same routine, going to the same stores, the same restaurants as you did with Alicia isn't healthy.” Lana had said, tapping the tip of her nose with her silver pen. Her sharp gaze studied Noah during one of their recent sessions in the Starbucks near her office. Noah had refused to see Lana in her office or sit on her couch so she conducted their sessions in restaurants, coffee shops and once, even in a grocery store. She was costing Noah two hundred dollars an hour plus food and drinks. And that was with her 'friends and family' discount.

  “You are exhibiting signs of chronic dysfunction, this inability to let go. A few days, weeks or months are understandable. But doing it every day, every week for nearly a year and half is very detrimental to your sanity.” Lana had drilled in his ears.

  Fed up of Noah's stubbornness to listen but not act, Lana had gone to his family, who in turn had gone to Alicia's family. It was ‘united-we-shall-bully-the-crap-out-of-someone’ kind of intervention. The result was that in less than a month, Noah was in Philadelphia where he had accepted a job offer - Head of Cardiology department at a renowned Philadelphia Hospital with a start date next week.

  Constant honks made Noah swing his gaze to the rear view mirror. A taxicab, one red car, behind him was honking like it was required by the law. Noah’s mouth twitched and he slowed down some more.

  You need some more bugging. Doctor's orders! Now have to find a place to live. Noah thought steering the wheel. Mother can find me something near the hospital.

  His mother was one of the top realtors in Baltimore with investment property all over the country. He reached out for his cell phone. It slipped from his fingers and went under the seat.

  “Fuck!” Noah just realized that the traffic light in front of him was about to turn red from yellow. He slammed hard on the brakes.

  His whole body jolted like John Cena had punched him in the back. Making an awful loud metallic grating sound, the car's metal frame shuddered, jerked, and came to a stop. The jerk was not caused by Noah hitting his brakes but by someone else not hitting their brakes soon enough - the car behind him!

  I don’t believe this. Some dick just rear-ended me! Noah opened his seat belt and shifted his body gingerly to make sure nothing in his body was broken.

  In that nanosecond, Dr. Noah Collins realized one very important thing, one thing that Lana had been unable to make him realize in years and the car driver behind him had succeeded in seconds – Noah wasn't ready to meet his creator yet!

  Chapter 7

  Danika barely had the time to register that the car in front of her had stopped. She slammed on her brakes but it was too late. The bonnet of her car slammed the trunk of the silver car. She heard the horrible sound of her bumper breaking and twisting as her body wrenched painfully, even though restrained by the seat belt.

  I just freaking rear-ended someone. My car is totaled. My insurance rates will go through the roof. I'm screwed and jobless! Oh my God, Oh my God!

  Danika was robbed of the power to move or think. She could only stare at the mangled metal in front of her that was now spewing fumes. The front of her car resembled her life – crushed and disfigured beyond a point of recognition.

  Repeated knocks on the window finally penetrated Danika's shocked mind. Her ponytail had come loose and most of her hair now covered her face. A man peered in, his dark eyes questioning. He was talking to her. Danika lowered the window with trembling hands.

  “Are you okay? Are you hurt?” Noah studied her face for any signs of pain or bodily discomfort.

  Danika shook her head. Her lips felt stuck to each other. The man with some gray in his sideburns gestured her to come out of the car. Working purely on reflexes, Danika undid her seatbelt. Something else came off - her foot from the brake!

  With a sickening crushing sound, she hit the car in front of her, again. Like some lacerated, dying beast, the other car shuddered and with a loud groan it rolled forward a few more feet on to the intersection, in the direct path of a garbage truck!

  "Hit the brakes. Hit the brakes!” Danika heard the man shouting at her through the window. People on the pavement near the intersection scampered to get away from the inevitable accident. Slamming on her brakes, Danika could only watch horrified. The garbage truck driver tried to stop his lumbering green vehicle. More metal on metal sounds, smell of burning tires and fizzing smoke were the only things that Danika registered.

  A wiry muscled hand peppered with dark hair reached past her and shut off the ignition. “Are you fucking high?”

  “What?” Danika blinked her eyes as she acknowledged the approaching police siren. It caused her to move. “No! I'm not high!�
� Ducking down, she pushed at the door. It refused to move. The man, around 5'11, moved back, all the while scrutinizing her. Danika pushed at the door.

  A sudden realization dawned on her. “Oh my God! There must be someone in the car I just hit.” Danika pushed at the door with her shoulder using all her might. It opened and she jumped out. She skidded and would have fallen down had it not been for the timely intervention of the man. He held her up by the forearm, his grip painful. But Danika did not care. Her anxious eyes were on the car she had just pushed in the path of the truck.

  “There is no one in the car!” Noah blocked her path. “What the hell were you thinking?” His voice was curt, his full mouth puckered in irritation. “You were right behind me. How did you not see the red light? Look at the mess you made.” He gestured at the pile sitting in the middle of the intersection.

  Danika could only stare at him. She was just beginning to find her breath.

  “Go back where you came from bitch!” Someone from the small crowd of onlookers that had gathered on the pavement shouted.

  Noah turned to them. 'Now there is no need for talk-"

  “You idiot. Moron!” Danika's low voice interrupted him.

  Noah’s eyebrows rose high up his face. “What did you just say?”

  “You slammed your brakes last minute. I was behind you, you stupid piece of shit.” Screaming did not come naturally to Danika so her voice was quiet but ferocity and rage shook her body. She wanted to throttle the man in front of her.

  Noah took a step toward her. “Excuse me. You are completely addled.”

  “You two okay?” Came a new voice.