Renegade Cowboy

by Sara Richardson

  But she had a date tonight.

  Excitement fluttered through her, the same way it had when she was sixteen. Once she’d taken Levi’s advice to live in the moment, being with him seemed to take years off her life.

  In the few short hours they’d spent at his father and Evie’s house last night, Levi had made her feel everything—desired and protected and happy. He’d made her laugh, he’d wrapped his arms around her, he’d kissed her. And in the midst of it all, she’d managed to banish the nagging hesitations. Who knew if he would even go back to riding anyway? Maybe the specialist he’d seen earlier that day had convinced him it wasn’t worth the risk. It wouldn’t be such a bad thing for him to retire early. Surely there was plenty he could do to help out with the Cortez’s stock contracting operation.

  After a few more sweeps of the mascara wand, she went to her bedroom and unearthed her favorite cowgirl boots—light brown and broken in enough that she could dance, if the situation demanded. She had no idea what Levi had planned, but she kind of couldn’t wait to find out.

  Humming to herself, she left her room in search of the small leather purse she’d packed with all of the date essentials—extra lip gloss, mints, condoms…

  The front door swung open, and her mom charged into the living room, eyes shining in a way they hadn’t for years.

  “You’re back!” Cassidy ran to hug Lulu. “How was your first day?” She’d spent most of it at the shelter with Jessa doing an orientation for her new job, and Cassidy had been dying to hear how everything went.

  “You know…” Her mother plopped down on the couch with an exhausted smile. “It was wonderful. I spent a lot of time with Sweetie, and she really seemed to perk up. Jessa said it was the most life she’d seen in her since she’d brought the poor dog in.”

  Cassidy sat next to her, hope beating through her heart. “That’s amazing.” It was exactly what her mother needed.

  “I think I’m going to love it there,” Lulu said, a genuine smile lighting her eyes. “I have a lot to learn, but Jessa is such a sweetheart. So patient and easygoing.”

  “Yes. She is.” A sweetheart and a saint. A wave of her friend’s sadness passed over her, but she had to believe that Jessa would eventually get her chance to be a mom. Someday it would happen. No one deserved it more…

  “You look gorgeous, honey.” Lulu smoothed the skirt of Cassidy’s simple, white sundress. “My beautiful girl,” she murmured. “Levi’d better treat you like a princess tonight.”

  A swell of emotion pressed tears into Cassidy’s eyes. This was how the two of them had been all those years ago…Lulu the protective mom, Cassidy the girl going on a date.

  “He sure seems enamored with you,” her mother commented innocently.

  “We’re having fun.” Actually, they may have taken one step beyond fun last night, but she wasn’t ready to admit that to her mom.

  “I’m so glad.” Her mother smoothed her hand over Cassidy’s hair the way she used to when she’d tuck her into bed at night. “I know these last few years haven’t been easy.”

  “It hasn’t been easy for either of us.” But maybe that was changing now. Finally…

  “I’m so sorry, Cass-a-frass.” Her mother gave her hand a tight squeeze. “It’ll never be enough, but I’m really trying this time. You deserve all of this. To go off and have the best life.”

  “So do you, Mom. It’s a new start for both—”

  A heavy knock rattled the front door and started Cassidy’s heart fluttering again.

  Lulu practically hopped off the couch. “Let me get it,” she said, not waiting for permission. “This reminds me of when you were going to prom your junior year. Who did you go with again?”

  “Sam Ellis.” Cassidy groaned. He was the most pretentious, arrogant honor student to ever grace high school.

  “That’s right. I didn’t like that boy.” Pausing by the door, Lulu straightened her tunic and fluffed her hair, which made Cassidy smile again. It’d been so long since her mother had cared how she looked, but now she stood tall and proud and opened the door gracefully. “Levi! Wow, don’t you look handsome.”

  Sinfully hot was more like it. Cassidy stood but couldn’t seem to find the strength to walk. Every time she saw him, that hypnotic pull between them intensified. Tonight it was downright explosive. He wore dark jeans and a black button-down shirt tucked in. He’d left his cowboy hat at home, and his hair had been styled in a sexy, carefree way.

  He stepped into the room. “You’re lookin’ pretty nice yourself, Lulu,” he said, charming her mother into a blush. “How was the first day on the job?”

  “I loved every minute of it.” She leaned in to give him a hug. “I can’t thank you enough for making it happen.”

  “No thanks necessary.” Cassidy had never seen him look so humble.

  “Wow.” His gaze traveled down her body, those bright hazel eyes heating the way they always did before he kissed her. “You look…incredible.”

  “Thanks.” She tried to say it casually, but her voice faltered.

  “Is that a limo?” her mother suddenly asked, peering out the window.

  A limo? Cassidy rushed over. Sure enough, a large white Hummer limo sat in front of their house, looking completely out of place. The driver leaned against the door, dressed in a crisp black uniform. Already, a small crowd of kids had gathered around, Theo among them.

  “What’s that for?” she asked, unable to take her eyes off the monstrosity that looked almost as big as her house.

  Levi shrugged, as though he hadn’t probably dropped a grand on a car for the evening. “Figured it’d be nice if someone else did the driving tonight.”

  “How thoughtful,” her mother cooed, but Cassidy didn’t say anything. She’d never ridden in a limo before. They didn’t even have limos in Topaz Falls, except for when the occasional celebrity came up for a ski vacation. “Where’d you find it?”

  “Don’t worry about it.” He tucked her under his arm.

  How could she not worry about it? She looked down at her clothes again, which a few minutes ago had seemed nice enough. “I’m not dressed for a limo.” Seeing as how a group of her neighbors had already found an excuse to walk down the block for a good look, people would be staring at them all night.

  “You look perfect,” he assured her. He leaned in and gave Lulu a kiss on the cheek. “Glad you had a good first day. We’ll see you later.”

  “Bye now,” her mom sang. “You two kids have fun.” She squeezed Cassidy’s shoulder lightly. “I won’t wait up,” she whispered.

  Cassidy forced a smile and nodded. The whole limo thing had thrown her off. It seemed so…unnecessary. Hadn’t he mentioned something about hanging out at the Tumble Inn for some country line dancing? Surely he wouldn’t take her there in a limo.

  “You look better than incredible,” Levi said, leaning close as he led her out the front door and down her crumbling concrete steps. “Damn, you’re sexy, Cass. But I didn’t want to say so in front of your mom.”

  “Probably best,” she agreed. “And thank you.” For the first time in a long time, she actually felt sexy. And nervous. But she hadn’t been. Not until he showed up in a limo.

  The group of kids around the car parted as Levi walked her over.

  “Are you getting married?” Mellie, Theo’s little sister, asked.

  Oh god. “No,” Cassidy said quickly. “We’re not getting married.”

  “On TV, that’s what people ride in when they get married,” the girl insisted, seeming put out that Cassidy wasn’t following the rules.

  “We’re just going on a date.” Levi gave the girl a wink.

  Cassidy’s face burned. Well, that was it. By tomorrow morning, the whole town would know she and Levi had gone on a date. Since Cash’s death, she’d managed to keep herself out of the local gossip spotlight. Until now. She’d always hated being the center of attention…

  “You must be going somewhere real fancy,” Theo said, looking up at
Levi in awe.

  “We are.” Levi stooped to the boy’s level. “We’re going to a restaurant on the side of a mountain.”

  “The Diamond?” Cassidy asked, horrified. Locals didn’t go to the Diamond. It was ridiculously overpriced and dished out the smallest portions she’d ever seen.

  “Surprise.” He stood back to his full height and glanced down at Theo again. “Only the best for the best girl,” he said.

  Wow. He was really putting on a show. Why did it seem so different than it had last night when they were with his family? What the hell was he doing?

  “You getting excited for the clinic?” Levi asked Theo as the driver opened the back door for them.

  “Heck yeah!” the boy shouted. “I’ve been practicing lassoing my dog.”

  Levi laughed. “Maybe practice on a stuffed animal instead.”

  “I will,” the boy promised. He bounded away like he couldn’t wait to get started.

  Awkwardly, Cassidy slid into the backseat of the limo. The inside was five times more obnoxious than the outside with sleek, white leather seats, a mini bar, and flashy neon lighting.

  Levi scooted in next to her. “So this is nice.”

  It was…ridiculous. But she didn’t want to seem ungrateful. “Yeah,” she murmured, wishing she could muster more enthusiasm. “Have you ridden in a limo before?” Was this a normal thing for him?

  The engine started, and they slowly pulled away from the curb. All of the kids waved and chased them down the block.

  “I’ve ridden in a limo a few times.” Levi poured them each a glass of white wine. “Mostly when we’re doing sponsorship events.” He handed her the glass. “So it seems like everything went well with your mom today.”

  “Uh, yeah.” She took a sip of wine before setting it off to the side in a cup holder that was custom made for the glass. “Sounds like it. She actually seems excited.”

  “I know the feeling,” he said, eyeing her. “I couldn’t wait to see you tonight.”

  A familiar heat snaked through her. This was all she’d wanted. Just him and her, the chemistry sizzling between them. “I was looking forward to it too.” As far as she was concerned, they didn’t need a limo or a fancy dinner.

  He set his wine next to hers and tilted her face to his. “I wanted to give you a night you’d never forget.”

  “Oh, I don’t think I’ll forget this.” It was already proving to be very memorable. Mostly because this wasn’t at all what she’d pictured when she’d thought about going on a date with Levi. Last night at his dad’s house, he’d been so down to earth and humble that she’d forgotten he even rode bulls, that there were a whole slew of shirtless pictures of him online. She’d forgotten that he was borderline famous in the rodeo world. But tonight that part of him seemed to be on full display. And this wasn’t the Levi she’d fallen for.

  Staring into her eyes, he slowly slid his hand up her thigh. Despite the confusion muddling her heart, her breath hitched. One simple touch and he’d made her knees weak. She moved closer to him, hoping he could make her forget all of her hesitations.

  “Since we’re both leaving after the clinic, I wanted everything to be perfect.” He started to lower his face to hers.

  Wait. “What?” Her throat ached in anticipation of his kiss, but she pushed him back. “Both leaving? I thought you were building a house here.”

  “I am.” He kept his face close and eyed her lips. “But I still have to travel. I’m headed to Wyoming with the Renegades a few days after you leave.” He moved to kiss her again, but she held him off.

  “A competition?” What the hell was he thinking? “You’re injured,” she reminded him. “You can’t compete.”

  Levi sat back with a sigh as if he’d given up on the kiss. “I did a full evaluation today and aced every assessment they threw at me.”

  “But it hasn’t even been four weeks.” The desperation beating in her heart edged into her voice. “And there’s no way this is your first concussion.” How could he even think about getting back on a bull right now?

  Levi’s shoulders raised in a defensive stance. “My MRIs are clear. I have no symptoms. The Renegades are counting on me, and I’m ready to get back. I have to.”

  “Of course you do.” The words garbled in her throat. Suddenly freezing, she turned to the window, watching the mountains roll past, but only seeing the scenes of her brother’s accident. They were still there, still so vivid. The hot sun beating down, the smell of dust and manure. The sight of Levi’s hands trying to shield her eyes so she wouldn’t see her brother’s broken body. Those images would always be there.

  “Cass…” He gently turned her face back to his. “This is who I am. You know that. You know I have to ride.” The pleading look in his eyes emptied her. Her body went numb. She’d been naïve to think he’d give it up. He couldn’t. Riding was too much a part of him, just like it had been a part of her brother.

  “What are you thinking?” He slipped his hand into hers. “What’s wrong?”

  She couldn’t force herself to look at him.

  “I’ve known you for twenty years.” He caressed her cheek in an intimate gesture that filled her eyes with tears. “Yesterday you danced with me. You kissed me back. I know you care about me as much as I care about you.”

  “I do,” she murmured, shrinking away from his touch. “But I’ve already told you I don’t want a relationship.”

  “With me,” he clarified, anger flashing in his eyes. “You don’t want a relationship with me. But you might meet some pediatrician at the hospital or a stockbroker in the city, and I’d be willing to bet you’d be open to a relationship with one of them.”

  The words stung with their truth. Yes, she might be open to a relationship with someone who never took the kind of risks he did every time he got on a bull. But she wouldn’t ask him to give it up for her. “There’s still this gaping hole in my life. Ever since Cash died, I haven’t felt fully alive.” Fear shadowed everything. Fear that something else would be taken away from her, and she refused to let her fear rob him of what he could achieve in the arena.

  “I can make you feel alive, Cass.” Taking her cheeks in his hands, he guided her lips to his. They’d become so familiar, that firm insistence, the pulsing heat against her mouth. Passion took over, moving through her body, pounding into her heart, torturing her with a growing hunger for him. She pulled back before she gave in.

  “I love you.” Levi rested his forehead against hers, his eyes as steely and determined as they were when he rode. “And I know you love me.”

  “It’s too hard.” Tears spilled down her cheeks. “You deserve someone who can give back to you. Someone who can support you in the things you love. I can’t. Not with the grief I still carry.”

  His jaw tightened. “Maybe I don’t need anything in return.”

  “I won’t do that to you.” She loved him too much. “You’ve grown up. You’ve become the man I always knew you would be. I do care about you, Levi. I always will.” She swallowed past the painful kink in her throat. “But I want you to take me home.”

  Chapter Eighteen

  In theory, getting back on a bull should be like riding a bike. At least he hoped so. Levi made his way to the bucking chute, weighted down by a protective vest and helmet. This was the longest he’d been off in five years, but he was ready. After the shitty date with Cass last week, he had a hell of a lot of frustration to take out on something. Reckoning could handle it.

  “You sure you want Reckoning?” Tucker stood outside the bucking chute, doing a preflight check. “It’s been a while. Maybe you should start with Ball Buster.”

  “Nah.” He hadn’t had this much pissed-off energy to burn in years. Maybe that’d give him a leg up with the big beast.

  As he walked past, Reckoning eyed him. It was almost eerie how still the bull got before a ride. Then the second that gate opened, he’d turn wild, and all that would matter was holding on. Levi wouldn’t have to think about anything e
lse—not about how Cass had run into her house before he could say good night, not about how she’d ignored his phone messages. For the last week, he’d been pulling together details for the youth clinic, but even that hadn’t been enough to get his mind off the whole mess. So this was it. His remedy.

  “I’m ready.” He pulled on his worn leather gloves and climbed the fence. At all of the rattling, Reckoning started to sway.

  “Hang tight.” Tucker held the ropes in place while Levi got ready to slide over.

  Across the corral, his dad waved. “Don’t let him get the best of you, son,” he called.

  He almost laughed. Reckoning got the best of every rider who was dumb enough to slide onto his back.

  “Ready when you are, hot shot.” Tucker positioned himself by the gate.

  “Let’s do it.” Levi slid his leg over and eased on, anticipating the bull’s stomps and lurches. He wrapped his hand around the bull rope, gripping until the familiar ache tightened his knuckles. “On three.”

  After a fast countdown, Tucker threw open the gate, and Levi was in the air. His thighs burned as he cinched his legs down in an attempt to anchor his body in the midst of Reckoning’s acrobatics. The bull leapt and kicked, sending dirt flying into Levi’s face. The jerks and violent jackknifes thrashed his joints, but the warm flow of adrenaline staved off pain. He lived for that feeling—that blind rush. Like when he’d kissed Cass…

  Reckoning arched and took a hard right. Shit! His form was off. The bull spun and threw him sideways.

  Levi hit the dirt hard and rolled, finally coming to a stop next to the fence. Tucker ran out, luring Reckoning away, so he stayed put, staring up at the sky while he got his breath back.

  “You almost had it.” His dad walked over and reached out a hand to pull him up. “But you’ve got to keep your arm square over the bull rope.”

  Levi dusted himself off. “Yeah. I remember.” All it had taken was one thought of Cass to derail him.

  They ducked outside the corral, and Luis faced him. “You’ve got a lot on your mind.”