Let Me Be the One

by Lily Foster

  Rene and Darcy were by me most of the night. Rene was uncomfortable, probably because her old boyfriend, Tanner, was there looking particularly miserable. She mentioned something about asking for Caitlin’s car to head back early but Darcy convinced her to stay. When those two, along with Caitlin, Cara and a few other girls headed for the pool I went to help Mac rotate the kegs. When I was rolling a new keg onto the back deck I saw Darcy standing by the pool braiding her hair over one shoulder as she was talking to Amanda and another girl. Great. I decided to keep myself busy on the other side of the pool but looked over there often. Darcy was in a bikini, as were the other girls but it was Darcy that was drawing the attention of the guys nearby. I watched as three UNH guys approached them with drinks and Amanda enthusiastically introduced Darcy to them. Guys were so obvious. I wondered if I’d ever been a prick like them, boldly eyeing her from her toes to her tits as they spoke to her. I’m pretty sure I had been. Enough was enough. I made my way over there and slid my arm around Darcy’s waist. “Hey, Amanda, I see you’ve met Darcy.” Then I looked at the three guys, “What’s up? I’m Tom.”

  They all backed off some and introduced themselves. They were good people and had clearly gotten my message. Amanda chirped happily, “Oh, Darcy’s your girlfriend? Well, I just met her but I love her already. I don’t blame you for dropping me, Tom.”

  Darcy looked up at me with raised eyebrows. “Long story,” I whispered as I slid my hand down and squeezed her hip. When Amanda left I explained that she was from long ago. “I was trying not to come over while you were talking to her but I felt like I had to run interference between you and those three douchebags.”

  “Huh?”

  “Darcy, I can’t watch as guys look at your body like you’re a tasty treat. Please, go in the pool or put a shirt on, otherwise I may wind up starting an ugly brawl.”

  Darcy batted her eyes at me, all innocent, and then slid out of my grasp. “Well, let’s see. I haven’t kissed—or banged—anyone else at this party while you, you’ve had your fun. Maybe you deserve to be tortured a little.”

  With that, she did a slow, sexy strut with her shoulders back and chest out, as she walked towards the bar where Caitlin was chatting up Chris. I saw her knock back a shot with Caitlin and then look back to me with a wink and a smile.

  I followed close behind and chuckled as I came up behind her and wrapped both arms around her waist as I whispered in her ear, “Oh, no you don’t. This hot body, these legs, these beautiful tits…they’re all mine. For my eyes only. Do you understand, Ms. Donovan?”

  She whispered back, “I wish there was no one else here, Mr. Farrell. I’d like you to untie the strings on this bikini and do dirty, wicked things to me in the pool.”

  Now I was sporting a massive hard-on. “Shit, Darcy. Start talking about the weather or something so that I don’t embarrass myself.”

  I knew she could feel exactly what I was talking about. She turned her face to the side and met my gaze with a sweet, shy smile. “I like that I do that to you.”

  I practically groaned, “You always do that to me. You always will.”

  Then she turned around and wrapped her arms around my neck. “I love you, Tom. I always will.”

  Chapter Eleven

  Darcy

  “Are you serious, Caitlin? You seemed so into Chris this weekend.”

  “No, Darcy, you just want me to be into Chris so you imagine these scenarios.”

  Rene chimed in, “I’m going to have to agree with her, Darce. It was Chris who looked totally smitten with Caitlin, I can’t say she looked like she was that into him.”

  I rolled my eyes, playfully. “Fine. I guess I’ll just have to get used to what’s-his-name.”

  Caitlin tapped her chin, faking the lost-in-thought look. “Yeah, what is his name?”

  Rene said, “I guess I have one less dateless loser to hang out with Commencement Dance night. I hate you, Caitlin.”

  I jumped in, “You don’t need to be dateless, Rene. I could name ten guys that would be begging for you to go with them if they thought they stood a chance.”

  “Thanks, but no thanks. And I’m going to end this conversation right now. I love you but I’m not up for twenty questions right now.”

  “No fun. Why can’t we meet him? Do you think your boyfriend will hate us? Are we that awful?” I teased.

  Rene blew us a kiss. “I’m outta here, love ya!”

  Caitlin and I were both flopped on the couch. It was Monday morning but we were both still a little beat from Mac’s party. “I’m sorry, Caitlin. I just think Chris is great and I know he’s crazy about you.”

  “I don’t feel that way about Chris so I don’t want to lead him on, you know?” She smiled, “Bill, which is his name by the way, is nothing but fun and that’s all I want right now. I envy you and Tom, really, but I haven’t found ‘the one’ yet and I’m ok with that.”

  “Alright, I’m officially relinquishing my matchmaking duties. Sorry, I know I can be a pain. I just want to see you all happy.”

  “I know that and I love you. Now, onto more important topics…did you get your dress yet? I need to go shopping.”

  “Yeah, I thought I showed you.” We made our way upstairs and as I took the garment bag out of the closet, I went on to tell her about Kasia and her fledgling website where she was selling her designs. “She’s a really talented seamstress or, I should say, a talented designer.”

  The dress was a strapless, knee-length, cream-colored dress with a detailed overlay. It had a slim, lavender colored grosgrain ribbon sash around the waist. Kasia had made it just for me so it hugged my body; it was so flattering. I couldn’t wait to wear it. I could tell Caitlin was impressed and that girl knew clothes. “Wow. She’s really talented, Darcy.”

  “I know. I wish there was time for her to whip something up for you but it would be cutting it too close. I’m definitely up for a shopping trip, though.”

  Caitlin and I spent a lazy afternoon on Newbury Street. Caitlin found a great, super short dress that was quite expensive, given the very little fabric used in its construction. Our mission was accomplished.

  Caitlin walked on the wild side compared to my other friends, so when on a shopping trip with her it wasn’t unheard of to wind up in an adult entertainment store. Today I got off easy when she dragged me into Agent Provocateur. I liked beautiful lingerie but generally didn’t shop in stores like this. For one, it was pricey, and it also felt a little risqué. The women in the store looked way more sophisticated and worldly than me. Caitlin didn’t bat an eye in places like this, though, so her attitude made me more daring. The pieces were so delicate, the fabric so fine; I found myself loving the experience and I couldn’t wait to surprise Tom with the corset, garters, and beautiful everyday sets I bought. He was going to flip. I decided the corset and garter would be his surprise underneath my dress on the night of the dance and I’d save the satin and detailed lace bras and panties for our trip.

  Tom made me feel like this desirable, sexy goddess. I sometimes didn’t recognize the wanton chick I’d become.

  Tom

  I felt like yelling at my roommates at the top of my lungs, “Would you get the fuck out of here already?”

  Darcy was at my place after her early class hanging out playing video games with me but she had that look in her eye. She had that look a lot, I’m happy to say.

  Once we were alone, I scooped her up and carried her up the stairs. I set her feet down on the floor and then went across the room and flopped down on my bed, legs crossed at the ankles and arms crossed behind my head. “I just want to enjoy this view for a minute.”

  I would never get tired of looking at her. As she moved towards me she gave me a wicked smile as she slowly teased me, slipping the straps of her sundress down and then back up onto her shoulders. When she finally slid the dress off and it pooled at her feet, she climbed up onto the bed. She stayed on her knees, above me, and looked down as she slowly unclasped her bra. This
girl owned me. She laid her body on top of mine and then spread her legs enough for me to settle in between her. I ran my hands over her body as I kissed her. Her skin was so soft. I could never get enough of her. I guided myself into her and she ground her hips into me, taking all of me in. I raised myself up and sat face to face with her, cupping her bottom to pull her in as deep as I could go. Being inside of her was heaven. I loved being with her. I loved everything about her. I never wanted to be without her.

  We lay there after, side by side, kissing, talking, laughing, and running our hands over each other’s bodies. We lazed around the rest of the morning, making love once more before peeling ourselves out of bed.

  It was nice to have time, just the two of us, being lazy together. Now it was just two weeks until graduation. Having a few weeks together in Europe was going to be great but then I knew we were going to have to figure things out from there. I didn’t push at all but hoped that Darcy would at least be in New York with me next year.

  When my phone rang, I ignored the unknown number the first time but then picked up when it rang again a minute later. “Hello, I’m looking for Thomas Farrell.” It was an elderly woman’s voice.

  “Yes, that’s me.”

  She went on to say that she was calling on behalf of Breanne Riley. I didn’t say anything right away because, honestly, the name didn’t ring a bell. Her breath was labored. “Thomas, can you hear me?”

  “Yes, I can. What is this pertaining to?”

  She sounded flustered. “Pertaining to? Well, pertaining to my granddaughter, Breanne. Do…did you know her?”

  “I’m sorry ma’am. The name doesn’t sound familiar.”

  She sighed, sounding disappointed. “Son, Breanne told me where you go to school and I live nearby. I know this is an odd request but could I trouble you to meet with me this afternoon?”

  “Um, I guess. Can you tell me what this is about?”

  “I’d rather speak with you in person. It’s of great importance.”

  She gave me her address and as I ended the call, a feeling of dread washed over me.

  Darcy

  “Everything ok?”

  Tom looked far away. “Yeah, fine. What were you just saying?”

  I was telling Tom about the possibility of me teaching this year. I had spoken to my father and I had several opportunities to work alongside surgeons while I took the MCATs again, reapplied for the following year’s admissions and ultimately, decided if being a doctor was actually what I wanted. I had also been contacted by the headmaster of my high school. He had run into my dad at a fundraiser and when my dad told him about my taking a year off, he’d asked if I might be interested in teaching some AP Bio sections. He had reached out to me again, anxious to see if I would take the position. And honestly, I was feeling good about it. Not just because I would be in New York with Tom but also because the idea of teaching was exciting, especially teaching AP Bio at my alma mater. Those kids were bright and would keep me on my toes. Conducting labs and preparing them for the AP exam would take a lot of work but I think it would be work I’d find fulfilling. I was kind of going on and on when I realized Tom had not heard a word I’d said. “So you’re ok with me posing for Maxim?”

  “Uh huh, that sounds good.”

  I waved my hand in front of his eyes. “Tom, what’s up? You’re in space.”

  He looked at me for a moment and then closed his eyes tight. “Sorry, that call was weird.”

  “Who was it?”

  “I’m not sure. It was some older woman asking me to meet her later today about something important. She mentioned a girl’s name…”

  “And?”

  He looked me straight in the eye with a pained expression. “At first it didn’t register but I think I do know the name.” After a silent moment he went on. “I feel like a shit but I don’t want any lies between us. I remember hooking up with a girl last year right after school let out. She was a bartender at a place in Newport. Her name was Breanne.”

  “Was she one night or a relationship?”

  He put his hand back on my hip. I think he wanted to keep me from bolting. “One night.” He went on, “I was honest with you, Darcy.”

  I knew who he was. It wouldn’t be fair if I flipped out on him now. I took a minute before I spoke again. “I know you’re being honest but sometimes it hurts. I can’t help that but…there’s nothing you can say that’s going to make me turn my back on you, ok?”

  He pulled me in close and let out a deep breath.

  “What do you think this is about, Tom?”

  “I don’t know but I don’t have a good feeling.”

  “Can I come with you?”

  “Absolutely. I want you there with me.”

  It was just one week before our Commencement Dance and all of us girls had planned to go shopping for shoes that afternoon. Obviously, I was going to have to back out. I didn’t know what this was about, although I sensed it wasn’t going to be good. I needed to know and I wanted to be there for Tom.

  Tom

  I was regretting having involved Darcy in this. I probably should have kept my mouth shut and done this on my own. This just didn’t seem like it was going to be good. Why would someone be contacting me on this girl’s behalf?

  Darcy was showered and ready to go and then at four o’clock we pulled up outside a modest house in a neighboring town that was older but neatly kept. I cleared my throat before I knocked on the door. All of a sudden I was nervous as hell; I mean, shaking. An older woman, like late-seventies maybe, opened the door and looked at me and then looked at Darcy for a long moment. “Hello, I’m Thomas Farrell. This is my girlfriend, Darcy.

  She smiled at Darcy and took a deep, ragged breath. “Come in, please.” We all stood awkwardly in the living room. “My name is Marjorie McDaniels. My granddaughter, Breanne, was someone you were acquainted with, Thomas?”

  “I believe so. Is she here?”

  “No but if you turn around, on that table there is a recent picture of her.”

  When I saw the picture I knew right away who she was. Newport, me very drunk, very good looking girl tending bar, ugh. The pit in my stomach grew when I took in the other pictures. There was one of a newborn in the kind of hat and wrap they wear in the hospital. There was another of Breanne with the infant on her lap.

  Fuuuuck me.

  I looked to Darcy, who was now sitting next to the woman on a couch on the other side of the room. She nodded to reassure me. She was an angel but I was dreading her reaction when she saw what I’d just been looking at. I cleared my throat again. “Is Breanne here?”

  The woman’s face looked stricken. “No, dear. Do you remember hearing about an accident between a charter bus and several cars on the Mass Pike last month?” When I shook my head she went on, her voice now lowered to a whisper, “Of course you wouldn’t. My Breanne was on her way home from working late and was involved in that accident. She died instantly.”

  The woman took in another ragged breath. Darcy gasped and then instinctively held the woman’s hands. “I’m so sorry.”

  She looked to Darcy and smiled. “Thank you, dear.”

  I stammered, “Is-is this her baby?”

  It looked like she’d grabbed onto Darcy’s hand tighter. “Yes, Breanne’s and…yours. I pled with Breanne to get in touch with you. She was unsure whether or not she would keep the baby or give him up for adoption. When she was a few months along she did go to see you. It was not her wish to do so but I had convinced her that every man was entitled to know if has was going to be a father. When she saw you, for some reason she decided against approaching you. She was adamant that she could do this on her own.”

  I had my eyes closed as she spoke. I was afraid to look at Darcy. When I did open my eyes she had her head lowered but was still holding hands with this woman. I wanted to ask if she was sure it was mine but I knew enough to know that saying something along those lines would be a bad idea right now. And I was having a flashback to a h
eat of the moment, already naked, “I don’t have a condom on me, I’ll pull out,” conversation.

  I’m such a fucking asshole.

  When I stayed quiet she went on, “I raised Breanne. She didn’t have it easy. My daughter was irresponsible and Breanne’s father was not someone I wanted involved in my granddaughter’s life, so I was just as happy that he didn’t ever bother with her. Breanne was smart, she worked hard, she was a good student, and she had a future mapped out for her and for James.”

  Darcy said his name aloud, to herself, “James.”

  “Yes. James’s birthday was February fifth.”

  Darcy looked at me. “He’s three months old.”

  I wanted to lie down on Mrs. McDaniel’s couch and just close my eyes. I had this sudden urge to sleep, to drift away, to escape. I forced out the words, “Where is he?”

  “I know this must be a shock for you, Thomas. No preparation. But life is like that, sudden, sometimes cruel, and sometimes difficult. Breanne’s life was cut short without warning. I don’t know what her wishes would have been. I’m the only person she had on this earth and I don’t know if she would have wanted me to contact you. I’m just doing the best I can. I’m an older woman.” She gestured over her shoulder to where an oxygen tank stood in the corner and chuckled. “I have emphysema. I’m not exactly able to go out and teach the boy to throw a baseball.”

  “Is the baby…is James here?”

  She gestured towards the hall. “He’s sleeping in the room. Go ahead in.”

  I was in a daze. When I didn’t move Darcy got up and took both of my hands in hers to prompt me. She led me in there and rubbed my hand as we walked over to the crib. Yep, a little baby, dressed in a blue one-piece thing was in there, sleeping peacefully. Darcy squeezed my hand.