A Mate For Seth

by Selena Scott

  I love you.

  The words rose within him and he fought them back.

  I want to be there for you.

  I want to help you through the hard shit.

  I want to be honest.

  I want to be permanent.

  I want you to know me.

  I want you to know me.

  I want you to know me.

  “Seth?” she asked after a long minute of quiet, contented on her side and fraught on his side.

  “Yeah?”

  “You could tell me your secret.”

  He froze. “What?”

  “The secret that you’re always beating yourself up about. You could tell it to me and I would listen. I wouldn’t judge you. If you’re in trouble, I’d help you.”

  “Sarah.” His voice broke and he couldn’t go any further.

  “You get to protect me from the bad shit in my life.” She pointed her spoon at her now-empty front porch. “Why can’t I help protect you from the bad shit in your life?”

  “I…” And for the first time since he’d met her, he simply couldn’t think of a reason why not. He knew the reasons were there, but his heart was beating loud enough to drown them all out. He couldn’t think. He could only feel.

  He loved her.

  His time was up.

  “I need to talk to my family about it, Sarah,” he was shocked to hear himself answer.

  “Okay,” she acquiesced immediately. Leaning forward, she kissed him roughly on the mouth. “Thank you for sticking up to my dad. Hopefully he’ll leave us alone.” She hopped off his lap. “Wanna go for a run, have sex, and then watch a movie?”

  He laughed. “In that order?”

  She soberly considered his question for a moment, her brow furrowing. Then she nodded. “Yeah. Definitely. That order makes the most sense.”

  “Deal,” he agreed, letting her drag him out of the chair.

  CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

  “I’ve had it up to my ears with those lame-os!” Nat shouted, slamming her hands on the steering wheel.

  “We just need to be patient,” Kaya asserted from her place draped across the backseat like a cat. The three girls had just come from the archery range where Sarah had given both of them a rigorous lesson. Now they were driving back into town and Nat was getting herself all riled up. “They’ll come around and tell us what’s going on at some point or another. They never hide stuff from us usually. And I’m telling Elizabeth that you called her a lame-o.”

  “No!” Nat whirled on her sister, making the car swerve. “She’ll dock me dessert for a month.”

  “Don’t threaten your lunatic sister while our lives are in her hands,” Sarah said to Kaya as she lunged for the steering wheel to straighten the car out.

  Natalie batted Sarah’s hands away and glared at her. “I might be a lunatic, but my hands are very capable.”

  “I still don’t understand why this hurts your feelings so much, Nat.”

  “Well,” Natalie sucked on her bottom lip, obviously trying to think of a way to answer Sarah’s question. “Did you know that the boys are all adopted?”

  Sarah nodded. “Seth explained about that a few weeks ago.”

  “Right… well, Elizabeth is the kind of person, the kind of mother, who can make you feel like you belong. She sort of creates family wherever she goes.”

  “She’s really sweet?” Sarah guessed.

  Kaya snorted from the backseat. “Hell no, the woman is a total hardass. But in a good way. She expects the best from the people she loves. But if you do your best, no matter what the outcome is, she’s totally on your side.”

  Sarah was quiet for moment. “Sounds like you two love her like a parent.”

  Kaya was quiet but Natalie nodded vehemently. “We do. We’ve known her for two decades now. And she was always very stable. Our parents are…”

  “Assholes,” Kaya chimed in from the backseat. “Complete and utter assholes.”

  “They’re complicated people,” Natalie said by way of agreement. “Our house was not a wholesome place to grow up in. We spent every second we could at the Durants’ house. As soon as Kaya turned eighteen, we moved into our own place and still spent every second we could at the Durants' house.”

  “What Nat is saying is that we’re really not used to getting cut out of their family. And not seeing them or getting invited over for such a long time, it’s a little hard not to take it personally.”

  Sarah thought for a long moment. That all made sense to her, and she felt for the girls. But she also wondered if maybe it all had to do with whatever Seth’s secret was. Maybe something really was going on with them.

  “Do you guys usually wait for an invitation? Or do you just go over?”

  “We usually just go over there for Sunday dinner.”

  Sarah looked at her phone. “Well, it’s almost time for dinner. On a Sunday. Why don’t you drop me off at my house and then head over there and see what’s cooking?”

  “Great idea!” Nat said.

  “Bad idea,” Kaya said at the exact same moment. “Nat, they want privacy right now, for some reason or another, and the least we can do is give it to them.”

  “Well, we won’t crash the whole dinner, we’ll just drop off the pot pie I made this morning and bounce. They’ll barely even know we were there.”

  “Hold up!” Kaya whirled around to look in the trunk. “There’s a chicken pot pie in the trunk of this fucking car, Natalie?”

  Nat said nothing. Sarah merely watched the drama play out.

  “Nat! You baked that pie this morning, put it in your trunk and were just innocently driving it around town? Have you been planning this the whole time?”

  “Oh, don’t make it sound so sinister. I’m dropping off food! Everybody loves to have free food dropped off.”

  “Don’t turn down their road, Nat. Don’t do it, you psycho! This is nuts! Give them space!”

  “Oh, don’t give me this holier than thou crap, Kaya. If you weren’t so scared of seeing Jackson, you’d be banging down their door along with me.”

  “Hold on, are we going there right now?” Sarah looked around, watching the car speed through the woods. “I’m really not invited to this house. Seth has never even mentioned me meeting his mother. There’s no way I’m just barging in.”

  “See? This is insane! Nat, turn around.”

  “If you two don’t want to come in, you can just wait in the car! See? Simple as that. We all get what we want that way.”

  Sarah watched in muted amazement and horror as Natalie skidded neatly into the driveway of a very secluded log-cabin-style house. If her heart hadn’t been beating so hard, she might have noticed that it was a very beautiful place to grow up in. With the arcing, tall pines and the flowering bushes lining the house, the tree swing out front. But she was too flummoxed by Nat’s behavior to do more than pull her phone out of her pocket.

  “I’m definitely staying in the car.” She opened a text and immediately sent a message to Seth.

  -Natalie’s lost her mind and is storming the castle right now (your mom’s house). But I didn’t want to intrude so I’m waiting in the car. Just thought I’d let you know.

  “Me too,” Kaya agreed. And they both watched as Natalie shook her perfect little ass all the way up the front porch, pot pie in hand.

  ***

  “Nat thinks we’re avoiding her and Kaya,” Raphael told the family at Sunday dinner.

  Elizabeth sighed. “Well, we haven’t been spending very much time with the girls lately. And never once at the house since…”

  She trailed off. They all knew what she meant. Since Bauer had come into their lives.

  The older man chuckled humorlessly and set his fork on the edge of the plate. “You want me to be somewhere else for a couple of hours a few times a week, I can do it. You can have your friends over. I won’t stand in the way of that.”

  “I don’t understand why we can’t just introduce them to Bauer,” Raph said candidly
.

  Bauer’s eyes grew wide and wary.

  “Seriously,” Raph shrugged. “They already know that we’re shifters. They’ve known since we were all kids. That ship sailed a long time ago. And they’ve never had a problem keeping the secret. Why can’t we just invite them over, introduce everyone and get it all out in the open?”

  Bauer leaned back in his chair, his arms crossed over his chest.

  “Just because,” Jackson said in a low voice, “they happen to already know the truth about us doesn’t mean we should compound it by giving them more information punishable by prison time, Raphael. Besides, I don’t think Bauer is comfortable letting just anyone in on who and what he is.”

  All eyes turned to Bauer and he was quiet for a long minute. “Raphael, I’m sorry that this is causing a rift between you and your friends, but Jackson is right. I’ll never, ever tell anyone—besides another shifter—what I am ever again. It’s too much risk. For everyone involved. People can have the best of intentions, be unbelievably loyal, but the government has ways of making even the most loyal of friends talk. And then you end up in an internment camp and she ends up in prison. It’s not worth it.”

  Chastened, Raphael pushed food around his plate like a little kid. “It just feels weird to keep a secret from them, is all.”

  “Like I said, I can disappear anytime you want to invite them over. I’m not trying to ruin your lives here, boys. I—” Bauer cut off for a moment. “I’d like to make your lives better if I could. You’re good boys.”

  There was a strange, light silence that fell over the group. It was still strange for all of them to be seated at their mother’s dinner table with a man there as well. And then to have that man express affection for the boys, no matter how gruff it might be? Seth wasn’t the only one shifting uncomfortably at the table.

  “That’s a good idea,” Elizabeth said after a minute. “I’ll invite the girls over this week and Bauer can take a walk in the woods. Can you all be here? Maybe on Wednesday?”

  Raphael nodded and Jackson grunted. Seth said nothing.

  “Seth?” his mother asked.

  He pursed his lips. He really didn’t want to commit to any plan that didn’t involve Sarah. “I’m not sure yet.”

  “You’re busy?”

  “Oh, Seth’s been very busy. He’s been busy all night lon—”

  Seth flicked Raphael on the ear hard enough to make his brother squeak like a little girl.

  Elizabeth looked wryly between them. “I take it there’s a new girl in your life?”

  Seth nodded. “I just started seeing her. Sarah. She’s the neighbor I told you about. The one I helped get her house together.”

  “You’ve got to be kidding me, Seth.” Jackson was glowering at him across the table.

  “What?”

  “I thought you’d decided to stay away from her. For her own good. For your own good.”

  “I—things changed, Jacks.”

  “Things changed how?” Jackson’s voice was getting lower and more ominous.

  “You need me to spell it out for you? We got together. We’re not just friends anymore. There’s feelings there.”

  “Seth, God. Why are you making this so hard?” Jackson shoved his food away from him. “You knew what was going to happen if you indulged this little crush. And now all of us have to deal with it!”

  “Deal with what?” Raphael asked, his mouth full again. “Jeez, Jacks, you’re such a drama queen. So what if Seth wants to get his dick we—” Raphael swallowed hard and glanced nervously at his mother. “Wants to date around with a cute girl. Who cares? You’re so uptight. Why would that put any of us in danger?”

  “No,” Seth cut in. “Jackson is right. I mean, what he’s sensing is accurate. It’s more than that. It’s more than casual. I’m in love with her.”

  Elizabeth sucked in a breath and Seth knew that if he looked up, her face would be white. All those years of protecting her boys were about to go up in smoke. But when he finally looked at his mother, there were tears in her eyes, and a small smile on her lips. “Oh, Sethy.” She reached across the table and gripped his hand. “Oh, Seth, I’m so happy for you.”

  “Happy for him?” Jackson’s eyes were bugging with emotion. “Happy? Ma, don’t you realize what he’s really saying? He’s going to want to tell her. If he loves her, he’s going to want to make a life with her. He’s going to expose her and us all at once. Putting everyone in danger. And you’re happy for him?”

  “Oh my God,” Seth scraped a hand over his face. “I’m so sick of all the things I can’t have. Or can never have. I’m so sick of hiding who I am and running from it and fearing it. I’m so sick of living a sick little secret every month. You won’t be happy until we’re all chained up in the basement. Isn’t that what you want, Jackson? You want all of us to die alone and harmless? You want all of us to be just as sterile and controlled as you are?”

  Jackson’s nostrils flared in and out and his eyes were squinted down in high emotion. At Seth’s side, Bauer slowly stood from his chair.

  “Don’t make this about me, Seth. Don’t make this about whatever buried issues you have about me being your older brother. Don’t make this a family thing. Didn’t you just hear what Bauer said? Are you deaf? Telling her is too much risk, Seth. For us. For her. For you!” Jackson put his head in his hands, gripped his hair.

  “Jackson!” Elizabeth was standing. “Hold on, now. That’s not fair. Seth is allowed to date a girl he’s interested in. He’s allowed to live his life the way he sees fit. There’s no law against that.”

  “No,” Jackson roared, standing too. Seth had never seen his brother this raw, this angry, this fired up. “Not when it puts the rest of us in danger. And her in danger as well. It’s our job,” he inhaled hard, his eyes dilating and contracting. “It’s our duty, to hide ourselves away. And that includes our fucking feelings. We cannot inflict ourselves on other people. It’s too dangerous!”

  By the last word he was at top volume, his voice terrifyingly shredded. Seth watched in muted horror as Jackson’s body cracked forward.

  He knew what was happening. His brother was shifting.

  Holy God. Jackson was shifting outside of the full moon for the first time in his life.

  “Jackson!” Bauer shouted. “Meditate, breathe, calm down. Anything. Picture the sky, Jackson. You’re at the bottom of the ocean. Listen to the sound of the water against your ears.”

  But it was too late. Jackson’s bones were cracking, his teeth elongating, fur was rising from his skin.

  “GET HIM OUTSIDE!” Raphael shouted.

  Seth lunged forward and ripped Jackson’s shirt over his head before he grabbed a shoulder and started hauling his brother out the back door. Normally, the shift would be over by now, but obviously Jackson was fighting it because he was still doubled over in pain, his bones cracking and reshaping one by one.

  Raph and Seth dragged Jackson into the backyard, yanking his shoes and pants off and then getting the hell away from the snapping, growling, fully irate wolf in front of them.

  Tears instantly sprang to Seth’s eyes. It had been years since he’d seen Jackson’s wolf. He was bigger now. More stately. More deadly. Seth and Raphael were reddish wolves, with gray and white hues here and there. But Jackson was a perfect, snowy white. His eyes were the same dark as they were when he was human. But there was nothing human in this wolf’s face. He looked wild, vicious and dangerous.

  “Elizabeth, get your bear spray,” Bauer said in a low voice.

  “What? No! I’m not macing my son,” she said, her voice just as passionate as Jackson’s had been moments ago.

  “Ma, do it!” Seth shouted as Jackson’s wolf came forward a few steps, snapping his jaws and growling at his family.

  He heard the door slam and then shouting. Jackson’s wolf looked out of his mind, red-eyed, furiously spitting and growling, his posture that of attack.

  Seth was terrified that Jackson was going to attack the
m, but he was even more terrified that his brother was going to sprint off into the woods and disappear. Who knew how long it would be until he could shift back into his human form? Who knew what he could do to himself or others in the meantime?

  “Son,” Bauer said, limping forward, his wound still bothering him. He held his hands out to Jackson, as if he were a lion tamer. “I know you can hear me. Try to concentrate on my words. You might not be able to piece the English together, but hear my meaning. Just try.”

  Bauer took a few steps forward.

  “You’re a good man, Jackson. You’re not a dangerous person. You’re not a dangerous soul. You can come back from this. You just need to get control. You just need to get your temper down.”

  Jackson growled more, baring all his teeth, shaking his head from side to side as if he were trying to free himself from a bee.

  The wolf’s eyes flicked behind Seth and he growled at Elizabeth, who was holding the mace in one hand. She didn’t tremble, but she looked heartbroken as she stepped up to Jackson.

  “I don’t want to do this.”

  “We have to, Ma. We have to incapacitate him.”

  “Oh, shit,” a voice said from behind them.

  They all whirled to see Natalie standing on the back porch, a pie on the ground where she’d just dropped it. “Is that Jackson? What’s happening? It’s not the full moon.”

  The wolf growled more, snapping his jaws and taking a step toward them.

  “Why are you here, Nat?” Raphael said, positioning himself between Nat, his mother, and Jackson.

  “We just came by to drop off some food.”

  “We?” Seth’s stomach dropped to his toes. “Who else is here?”

  But Natalie didn’t get a chance to answer because just then, from around the corner of the house, Kaya and Sarah came running, extremely concerned looks on their faces. They must have heard the shouting.

  Running up behind any wild animal is a bad idea. But running up behind a very angry, very on-edge wolf is even worse.