Dreamspinner Press Year Nine Greatest Hits

by Michael Murphy

  Maybe it was.

  He wandered the aisles of the supermarket, sipping absently at the drink and not really tasting it. He didn’t feel the need to cook something to impress Scott. It wasn’t a date, after all.

  Evan stopped dead right in front of a display of peppers.

  Was it a date?

  Was he about to have a date with Scott?

  Shit.

  That changed everything.

  It wasn’t like he could call and ask Scott what he was expecting…. Well, dinner and sex, they’d pretty much agreed on that already. But did dinner and sex equate a date?

  Shit.

  It definitely did.

  He had condoms in his nightstand; he’d checked that before he left the house. Checking the supply of condoms wasn’t exactly unusual for him, though. Evan was no angel, and he preferred fucking in the comfort of his own home rather than in a club or alley or, heaven forbid, someone else’s dirty house.

  Evan was startled out of his thoughts by someone loudly clearing their throat, and he stumbled away from the produce section with his neck hot with embarrassment.

  He had a good idea what food was in his cupboards, so it didn’t take long to do a sweep of the supermarket and collect the things he needed to make one of the few fancy meals he was confident preparing.

  THERE WAS a light knock at the door, and Evan almost startled. He took a deep breath, turned the heat down on the stove, and went to the door.

  Scott looked incredible. He was wearing dark blue jeans and a lighter blue denim shirt, most of the buttons undone, exposing his firm chest. With his pale skin and dark hair, he looked dreamy, and when he gave Evan one of those familiar lopsided smiles, Evan felt his stomach flip over.

  “Hey.”

  “Hey yourself.”

  “Here, come in.”

  Scott grinned and brought his hand out from behind his back with a flourish, presenting Evan with a bunch of yellow tulips. Evan laughed, feeling his cheeks heat.

  “Thank you,” he murmured, then tipped his head to the side in invitation. “Let me put these in some water. Then we can go out. I thought I could show you the area.”

  “That would be good.”

  Evan grabbed a vase from under the sink and filled it with cold water, then dumped the flowers in it without unwrapping them. He could do that later. The chicken and potatoes would continue to cook while they were out; all he needed to do was let them roast. After a moment’s hesitation, he reached for the drawer next to his microwave.

  “You still smoke?” he asked.

  “Sure,” Scott said with a shrug.

  Evan nodded and grabbed a small bag of weed, plus his tobacco pouch and skins. When he turned, Scott was far closer than he’d anticipated, and Evan almost stumbled.

  Almost.

  “Hey,” Scott said, his voice a soft drawl.

  “Hey.”

  “Is it okay if I kiss you?”

  Evan nodded, tucking the weed into the back pocket of his jeans. “Sure.”

  Scott was slow and thorough about it, wrapping his hand around the back of Evan’s neck and pressing their lips together, firm and sweet. Evan kissed him back, not wanting to be the passive partner. Not this time.

  After a few seconds, he broke away and rubbed the pad of his thumb over Scott’s full bottom lip.

  “Come on,” he said softly.

  Scott had his mom’s car—Evan recognized it but didn’t say anything. He guessed at least one of the Sparrows knew where Scott was tonight, and he wasn’t ready yet to decide how he felt about that.

  They hopped into his car, and Evan immediately headed for the coast. There wasn’t a beach here, not the same as back home, but they could drive along the long road that wound its way through dense forest and wide nothingness with the sea breeze filtering in through the open window.

  It felt like they could talk forever. It wasn’t just all the things they’d missed in each other’s lives over the past few years. It was more than that. Probably the core of what made them friends in the first place.

  Evan teased Scott about being a Bears fan now, about the weather up north, about his clean-cut, gym bunny physique.

  Scott retaliated with small-town jibes, about how Evan had crossed state borders too, about him being a traitor now.

  There was no pressure, no obligation for them to act a certain way, to feel anything other than the peaceful sweetness of spending time with the right person.

  It was early enough in the year for the light to start fading while they were still out. Evan pulled up to a spot he came to fairly regularly. It was a little higher up, and they could get out and walk almost to the edge of the cliff face.

  “This is nice,” Scott said as they settled down, looking out at the wide expanse of the Atlantic.

  “Hmm.”

  Evan quickly rolled a joint and lit it, then inhaled deeply before passing it off. The sweet smoke hit his lungs, and he savored the taste of it before letting it go slowly.

  “How long have you lived here now?” Scott asked.

  “I bought the house about eight months ago.”

  “Were you living with your mom before that?”

  “No,” Evan said, feeling himself start to relax as the smoke took hold. “I had a roommate for a while, out in Suffolk. It wasn’t ideal, but the room was cheap, and he didn’t mind about me leaving my work all over the place. How about you?”

  Scott huffed a laugh. “Pretty much the same, actually. Though I still rent. I have my own place.”

  “Nice.”

  Scott nodded. “It is.”

  They fell into another companionable silence for a few minutes, watching the waves and passing the joint back and forth. When it was almost burned out, Scott took one final pull on it and stubbed it out on a rock, then straddled Evan’s thighs.

  They’d done this before, and Evan grinned, holding on to Scott’s waist as he tilted his head and exhaled into Evan’s mouth as Evan breathed in.

  The smoke felt softer like this somehow, and sweeter still. Evan tipped his head to blow it away, then slid his hands down to cup Scott’s ass and leaned in for a kiss.

  There was so much promise in tonight. It felt like the culmination of years of watching and waiting and wanting, and yet Evan still wanted to take his time. Not to rush. So when Scott licked his way into Evan’s mouth, Evan pulled away and rubbed their noses together.

  “Come on. Or the food will burn.”

  They’d taken the scenic route out here, but it only took five minutes and a shortcut to get back to the house. The chicken looked pretty good when Evan poked at it. He wriggled his ass after Scott let out a low wolf whistle and straightened up, laughing.

  “Can you deal with wine?” he asked.

  “Sure. Any preference?”

  “There’s a bottle of white in the fridge.”

  Evan had made this dish before—chicken breasts still on the bone with skin on, cooked with lemon and garlic. Roast potatoes. Then the dish was served with slices of pear and blue cheese and piles of buttery green beans. It was easy to prepare but looked impressive, which was what mattered on a date. Or a nondate. Or whatever this was.

  “Wine,” Scott said, passing Evan a glass.

  “Thanks. I don’t have a dining table—I turned the dining room into my studio. So we’ll just eat in here.”

  Scott nodded and went to the drawers, took out matching silverware, and set them on the breakfast bar. It didn’t take long for Evan to plate up the food, not bothering too much about presentation, considering who was going to be eating it.

  “This looks amazing,” Scott said when Evan slid a plate in front of him. “Thank you.”

  “You’re welcome.” Evan hopped up onto the barstool and raised his wineglass to clink against Scott’s. “I don’t get the opportunity to cook for people very often. It’s nice.”

  “When you cook like this, you can do it for me anytime,” Scott said. He took a sip of the wine, then dug into the potatoes.<
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  Evan grinned at his enthusiasm, then started on his own meal.

  IT WAS almost like nothing had changed. Almost.

  Time meant little now that they were back together again, and even the promise of something sexual later didn’t affect the easy mood. Evan had known this man almost his whole life.

  They finished the first bottle of wine during dinner and opened a second to drink while sitting out on the porch, smoking another joint. Evan sat here often enough smoking, and none of his neighbors had ever noticed, so he guessed they wouldn’t now.

  “I can’t believe Lacey is married,” Scott said, leaning against the porch frame and tipping his head back. The sunset reflected off his handsome features, and Evan felt a tug in his belly he’d grown used to ignoring. It was still there, that bone-deep affection. Lust. Love.

  “I can.”

  “It’s weird that you two are, what? BFFs?”

  Evan laughed. “You abandoned the both of us. We bonded.”

  “Aw, don’t put it like that. Seriously, how did you get to be friends?”

  “We always were, Scott. I came back after college, and it was weird. Everyone I knew had moved away. And the ones who were left weren’t exactly the sort of people I wanted to hang out with. I was in a bar on the Boardwalk with a few people who were annoying the living hell out of me, and Lacey was in there too. Not drinking, just hanging out with her girlfriends. We got to talking and exchanged numbers…. I suppose the rest is history.”

  “She didn’t tell me for a really long time.”

  “What, that we’re friends?”

  “Yeah. I think she was expecting me to be mad at her.”

  “Were you?”

  Scott scoffed. “No. I was jealous.”

  “Really?” Evan asked. He reached for his lighter and relit the blunt.

  “Yeah. It was shit, not talking to you. Then I find out my baby sister is your new best friend? It sucked.”

  “You could have just called me.”

  “Would you have answered?”

  Evan huffed a laugh. “I guess not.”

  “There you go.”

  Evan stretched out his legs, appreciating the last of the warmth of the day, and passed the joint over.

  “Finish it, if you like.”

  Scott inhaled deeply, just once, then scuffed the end out on the edge of the porch. When he looked up again, Evan caught his eyes and his heart stuttered.

  In this light, Scott’s Irish pale skin seemed to glow amber, his eyes shockingly blue. The dark stubble on his jaw suited him, made him look rugged and exceptionally handsome. For too long Evan had been forced to hide this, to bury it in a box and hide the box somewhere his mind couldn’t dwell on it.

  “Do you want to come back inside?” Evan blurted.

  Scott smiled, lazy and knowing. “Sure.” He rolled to his feet and extended a hand. For a split second, Evan just stared at it. Then when Scott chuckled, Evan grabbed it and allowed Scott to haul him to his feet.

  Once they were inside, Evan locked the front door, not caring if it was presumptuous. Scott seemed to know, or at least sense Evan’s hesitation, and put his hand on Evan’s lower back.

  “You okay?”

  There really wasn’t a good answer to that. Evan grabbed Scott’s hand, leaning in to press their mouths together.

  “You’re nervous,” Scott said, his voice softly teasing.

  “Uh… yeah.”

  “If it helps, I really want this. I’ve spent far too long thinking about it. It’s about time we figured it out.”

  Evan felt himself smile and stepped in close, wrapping his arms around Scott’s neck to bring them together for another slow kiss. Scott took Evan’s hips in his hands, gripping tight enough that Evan felt so very secure, and brought their bodies even closer together.

  Scott broke away and started pressing little kisses to Evan’s jaw. The move was enough to make Evan shudder, and he reached down, took Scott’s hand, and linked their fingers together. It only took a little tug to get Scott following him to the bedroom.

  “It’s not much,” Evan said, feeling embarrassed as Scott shut the door behind them.

  “What are you talking about?”

  Evan shrugged, feeling his face heat. “This place.”

  “It’s you, Evan,” Scott said. “And you don’t need to impress me. Fuck what I think.”

  The bedroom was small. So small, in fact, that all he could fit in the room was his bed and a chest of drawers. He used the hallway closet as hanging space. His bed was tucked under the window and looked out over the back of the property, to where his backyard melted into woodland. At night it was so quiet he could hear for miles.

  “Come here,” Scott said softly, and Evan fell into his arms.

  They knew something about kissing each other now. It wasn’t natural yet, and they were still figuring things out, but this environment seemed to encourage a different kind of touching. Evan pushed his palms over Scott’s chest, feeling the firm muscles beneath his hands and how they twitched when Evan touched.

  For the next hour or so, they made out like the horny teenagers they’d never gotten to be together. No clothes came off, hands stayed above the waist, and Evan regretted so hard and so deep he thought he might be bleeding from it. Scott’s lips were perfect, a painful reminder of everything he’d ever wanted and not dared to reach for.

  “I haven’t been with a guy before,” Scott said, slightly breathless as he rubbed his cheek against the stubble on Evan’s jaw.

  “You’re with one now,” Evan said lightly. His heart was hammering in his chest.

  “I know. I want this so fucking bad. I might need you to help me. Y’know. Make it feel good for you.”

  “Just do what feels good.”

  Scott reached down between them and pressed his hand over Evan’s erection. Evan groaned, the reflex noise breaking into a laugh.

  “Just for the record, that feels good,” Evan murmured.

  “Good.”

  When Scott leaned back to unbutton his shirt and shrug it off his shoulders, Evan wanted to whimper at both the sight and the sudden loss of contact. Scott was different now. He had hairs on his chest, dark ones that Evan wanted to run his fingers through. Scott’s body was broad and strong, though he had a little chub around his middle. His arms and shoulders were tight and toned, suggesting he lifted weights. Evan wanted to touch everything.

  Instead he started to strip out of his own clothes, fumbling as he went, since he didn’t want to take his eyes off Scott and his slow striptease.

  “Fucking hell, Evan.”

  “What?”

  Scott shook his head. “You look incredible. How did that weedy kid I knew grow up into….”

  “Finish that sentence,” Evan teased.

  “You’re hot,” Scott said, a blush crawling over his cheeks.

  “Thanks. You’re not bad yourself, Captain.”

  Scott laughed, a low, throaty chuckle, and reached for Evan again. Evan let himself be drawn into another deep kiss, his tongue licking into Scott’s mouth, fucking him softly.

  “Can I… can I suck you?” Scott gasped as he pulled away.

  “Yeah. Did I say that too quickly? Fuck it. Yeah.”

  “You’re so funny,” Scott said and lowered his mouth to Evan’s chest, kissing down it slowly. Together they fumbled with Evan’s belt and jeans, pushing them down his thighs and laughing as Evan kicked them away.

  Evan was expecting sex with Scott to be sloppy and inexpert. After all, Scott had admitted to having not been with a guy before. Maybe he’d watched a lot of porn, though, because the way his mouth felt on Evan’s dick was insane.

  If anything, Scott was too gentle, letting his mouth quietly explore. He licked up and down Evan’s shaft a few times, then took it into his mouth and sucked, seemingly pleased when Evan’s hips bucked up off the bed.

  Evan curled his fists into the sheets, trying not to demand more of Scott than what he could give.

>   “Can I fuck you?” Scott asked, his breath hot and wet against Evan’s neck.

  “Fuck. Yeah.”

  “Sure?”

  “Very.”

  “You need lube, right?” Scott said.

  It had grown dark now, and his handsome face was almost hidden in shadow. Evan wanted to turn on a light to be able to see him again.

  “You watch porn?”

  “Sometimes,” Scott admitted. He grinned and leaned down, took one of Evan’s nipples between his teeth, and tugged lightly.

  “Fuck,” Evan gasped, his back arching off the bed.

  “Learned that one from porn,” Scott laughed. “Gimme the damn lube.”

  Evan wasn’t sure what to expect. His fingers twitched against the sheets as Scott poured lube onto his fingers, then rubbed it around, testing the feel of it. Evan spread his legs, feeling slutty and loving it. If he couldn’t be wild and sexual now, he never would be. He wanted to feel like this for Scott.

  Scott reached down between Evan’s legs and groped around, testing Evan’s responses as he prodded and petted and finally, finally tickled his index finger over Evan’s hole.

  “Fucking hell,” Evan gasped, his back arching off the bed and hand going to his own cock, squeezing it at the base instinctively.

  “You like that, hmm?” Scott said softly. He kissed Evan’s hip bone, then his belly, then licked at the head of his cock. “You want my fingers?”

  “Fuck. Yeah.”

  “Good,” Scott growled and pushed the tip of his index finger against Evan’s hole until it relented and pulled him inside.

  There was more lube, and more fingers, and Evan let himself go and feel and not think at all. When he dared to open his eyes, Scott was right there, looking back at him, or maybe watching his own fingers as they moved smoothly in and out of Evan’s body.

  “Tell me what to do, Evan,” Scott begged.

  “Just this. More of this is good.”

  “Evan.”

  Evan took a deep breath and summoned his self-control. “Here,” he said, passing Scott a condom.

  “Sure?”

  “Oh, Lord. Very.”

  Scott wiped his fingers on the top of his thigh and carefully rolled the condom on. Evan had watched him, entranced at the sight of Scott’s gorgeous, thick dick being covered by the clear latex, and then Evan pulled himself together and poured lube on his fingers.