Dreamspinner Press Year Nine Greatest Hits

by Michael Murphy

  He sat down on the edge of the bed and thought hard for a moment, letting his conscience and his curiosity battle it out. In the end, he had to go back into the kitchen for the take-out menus. He opened the laptop and was met with a log-in screen. He had no idea where to start, so he shut the lid again, strangely relieved. His snooping had been curbed by a simple password.

  Evan felt better about that.

  He flicked through the menus, debated Chicago deep-dish pizza, just so he could say he had tried it, then decided on Chinese. Chinese food was Chinese food, no matter where you lived.

  He made the call, put in his usual order, and paid on his credit card. It had grown dark outside—properly dark this time, since it was closing in on seven in the evening. Since he had an hour before the dinner would be ready, he decided to take a shower while he waited for the food to arrive.

  LATER THAT night, Evan plugged in his phone to charge next to Scott’s bed. They had the same model phone, by coincidence, so it didn’t matter that he didn’t have his own charger. After his shower, he’d changed back into his clothes, but he didn’t want to sleep in them.

  This felt even more intrusive than his snooping earlier, going through the drawers in Scott’s dresser and picking something to sleep in. Scott had several pairs of plaid flannel pajama pants tucked neatly into his chest of drawers, and both long- and short-sleeved T-shirts. Back home, Evan liked sleeping naked in the summer, but he wasn’t about to do that in someone else’s home.

  After rooting around in the drawer for far too long, Evan picked out a light gray long-sleeved T-shirt and green pajama pants and quickly changed into them. He folded his own clothes and left them on the floor next to the dresser. He locked up the apartment, brushed his teeth with a spare toothbrush he’d found in the cabinet under the sink, then turned off all the lights.

  Even as far up as the apartment was, Evan could still hear the traffic outside. It was a strange novelty. He’d grown up in a quiet area and was used to being able to hear the waves of the ocean on a particularly quiet night. The city seemed to continue to buzz, even as its inhabitants settled down to sleep.

  He wriggled under the thick comforter, preparing to sleep on Scott’s side of the bed. Because he was weak and couldn’t help himself, Evan turned his head and inhaled the scent lingering on Scott’s pillowcase.

  He turned onto his side and curled up, facing away from the window. After a few moments, he heard the soft padding he’d come to associate with the cat, who jumped up onto the bed and started to settle herself. When he peeked over his shoulder, she was licking her ass. Evan couldn’t help but crack a smile at that.

  It didn’t take long for sleep to start to curl around the edges of his vision, despite the unfamiliar bed and the unusual bedmate. Evan clutched the comforter to his chest, thought about Scott sleeping in this very spot like this, and let the comforting vision carry him off to sleep.

  THE NEXT morning, Evan woke with a start when something soft brushed against his neck.

  “Mrow.”

  He chuckled softly when Princess butted her head against his shoulder.

  “Okay, okay, I’m awake. I’m awake,” he grouched. His throat was dry—that Chinese food last night had been damned salty—but he felt better rested than he had in a long time.

  Evan stretched, rocking his neck from side to side, and checked the clock on the wall. Then he startled. It was almost nine thirty. He never slept this late.

  “Mrow,” Princess insisted.

  “You want breakfast, huh?”

  Princess gave him another plaintive little cry.

  “All right, let’s feed you.”

  The apartment felt warm as he wandered through to the kitchen, his muscles feeling a little sore from sleeping for so long. He poured more cat food into Princess’s dish and topped up her water, then did a few yoga stretches in the kitchen to loosen himself up. No one was watching; it was fine.

  Evan’s stomach growled at him, and he rubbed a hand over it absently. It was long past his usual breakfast time. Scott didn’t have a fancy coffeemaker like Evan did, but he did have some okayish instant stuff that would do the job of waking him up just fine.

  He spent a half hour playing with Princess, finding out quickly that the red yarn he found under the coffee table was her favorite. When she curled up in a patch of weak winter sunlight for a catnap, Evan took the chance to sneak back to the bedroom to get dressed.

  There was a small problem.

  He hadn’t borrowed any of Scott’s underwear last night, instead preferring to sleep in his own. But he really didn’t want to spend another day in the ones he had on now. That was just… gross. That left him with the choice of going commando or borrowing a pair.

  A quick shuffle through Scott’s underwear drawer revealed that they wore the same size. That seemed to make the decision for him, and he grabbed a pair of black boxer briefs and pulled them on, then dumped his own in the laundry hamper. They were the same brand, so Scott would maybe not notice.

  Princess was still sleeping when Evan was done making the bed and righting the apartment from the small amount of mess he’d made the night before. He felt guilty about abandoning her like this. She’d wake up and not know where he’d gone.

  Still, Evan wanted to get to the hospital and check on how Scott was doing. On impulse, Evan pulled his phone out of his pocket and snapped a picture of the cat curled up and asleep. There. He could prove to Scott now that he’d done his job and taken care of the little princess.

  TRAFFIC WAS blessedly light, and it didn’t take Evan’s cab driver long to drive the few blocks over to the hospital. It was definitely too cold to walk, even if Evan was used to walking a lot back home.

  The late start to his day had knocked Evan out of sorts, and he felt his stomach growl again as he passed a vending machine. Feeling annoyed with himself, he pulled a handful of change from his pocket and bought a granola bar.

  When he got to the ward, Scott was sitting up in bed watching a TV in the corner of his room.

  “Hey,” he said with a soft smile as Evan walked in.

  “Hey. You’re awake.”

  “I feel like I’ve slept for a month.”

  “Just a week.”

  “Has it been that long?”

  Evan nodded, taking the seat next to the bed he’d been an almost-permanent fixture in since he arrived. “It’s Thursday.”

  “Fuck.”

  “What’s wrong?”

  Scott shook his head. “It’s nothing. Stupid. There was a big meeting at work today and I’ve missed it. Stupid.”

  “Your employer is going to be okay, though, right? I mean, you were pretty touch-and-go back there, Scott. If they’re going to be shitty with you about it….”

  “No, I’m sure it’s fine. I’m just really bad at letting go and handing stuff over to other people in my department. They’ll just fuck it up.”

  “You’ve cursed twice now. You must be feeling better.”

  Clearly too weak to push at Evan’s shoulder like he would have years ago, Scott settled for sticking his tongue out. “I do,” he admitted. “It’s weird. I hurt all over. My ribs especially. Is that weird?”

  “I dunno. Maybe you should mention it to the doctor. I can get one for you if you want.”

  “No, they’ll be around later anyway. They want to move me to another ward. How’s my cat?”

  “She’s gorgeous. We snuggled last night.”

  Scott laughed. “Really? She’s usually a bitch to people she doesn’t know.”

  “Seriously? She was all over me. She’s the most affectionate little thing.”

  “Are we talking about the same cat? My cat?”

  Evan grabbed his phone and pulled up the picture he’d taken before leaving the apartment. “This one?”

  “Yeah, that’s her.”

  “Maybe she just misses you.”

  “Fuck,” Scott said. “I miss her. I wish she could come in here.”

  “I don’t
think they let cats in hospitals, Cap.”

  “Well, they should.”

  Scott reached for Evan’s hand and linked their fingers together. Evan was careful of the tubes stuck in the back of Scott’s hand and gently stroked his thumb over Scott’s knuckles.

  “I really missed you,” Scott said softly. “I think leaving you after Lacey’s wedding was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done.”

  They’d been in contact over the past few months, almost exclusively by text. Exchanging messages back and forth seemed easy, simple. That way they didn’t have to face what they’d done.

  “I miss you too. Things aren’t any easier now, though, Scott. We’re still in the same situation. Nothing changed.”

  Scott didn’t meet Evan’s eyes, even when Evan gently squeezed his fingers.

  “What?” Evan asked.

  “A few months back I started talking to my boss about the possibility of a transfer.”

  Evan felt his stomach drop. Chicago was already too far away. What if Scott decided to relocate somewhere even farther?

  “Where to?”

  Scott huffed a tiny laugh. “DC.”

  Evan blinked and said nothing while he got his thoughts in order, then decided to say something—anything—because Scott was now looking at him expectantly.

  “Why?”

  “I’m done here,” Scott said with a shrug. “I’ve achieved a lot, but I want something else now. It’s not just you, by the way. I want to be closer to my parents again. To Lacey and Tom too. My whole family is in Virginia and… I mean, I have friends out here. Good friends. Good colleagues, and I like my job. But I’m twenty-eight, for fuck’s sake, and I have to think about what comes next.”

  “What comes next?” Evan asked, almost afraid to know the answer.

  “Come here,” Scott said and tugged on Evan’s hand.

  Evan let himself be pulled up and sat on the edge of Scott’s bed, their hands still twined together. Scott reached up with his other hand and gently ran his fingers along Evan’s unshaven jaw. He pushed his fingertips into Evan’s hair and used the leverage to pull himself up and drag Evan down into a slow, careful kiss.

  It was soft and chaste, just a brush of lips on lips, and Scott smelled like hospital and antiseptic and like he’d been in bed for a week. Evan thought it was possibly the most wonderful thing he’d ever felt.

  Evan pressed their foreheads together and sighed deeply.

  “If,” Scott started, then shook his head. “If or when I move home, can I stay with you?”

  “At my place? That’s a hell of a commute to DC.”

  “I don’t care.”

  “You want to live with me?” Evan asked. He was so confused.

  Scott laughed, a little breathless. “I’m asking you to be my boyfriend, you idiot. I want us to be together.”

  “Are you serious?”

  “Deadly.”

  “Oh.” Evan paused for a moment while his heart stuttered in his chest. “Oh.”

  “Are you going to leave me hanging, King?” Scott said, trying to tease but sounding actually nervous.

  “What? No. Shit, I mean yes. Yes. I’ll be your boyfriend. Fuck.”

  “Are you sure?” Scott laughed.

  “Yeah. Really sure. I’ve only wanted this since forever.”

  “Good.”

  There was a light knock at the door, and Evan jumped back so fast he almost fell over. Andre, the nurse from the night Scott had crashed, stuck his head around the door.

  “The doctor will be round in about ten minutes,” he said, smirking. “Your, uh, brother is going to need to wait outside.”

  “Sure,” Evan said, gathering up his backpack, knowing he was blushing deeply. “I’ll go call your—uh, call our mom. Call Mom. Let her know how you’re doing,” he stuttered.

  “Isn’t he adorable?” Scott said to Andre.

  “The most,” Andre agreed.

  IT TOOK a week more until the doctors were prepared to release Scott from the hospital. In that time, he’d lost almost twelve pounds, and it showed. The usual broad strength across his shoulders and back had turned into a hunch against the cold.

  Evan spent the morning cleaning Scott’s apartment of all the mess he’d created while living there. Once Scott’s family had returned to Virginia, their jobs and their lives, he’d taken the opportunity to become Princess’s full-time human companion. It made more sense than paying for a motel room.

  Lacey had arranged for his graphics tablet to be shipped up to Chicago so he could keep working in between visiting Scott in the hospital. The few projects he had on the go were now on hold, and he’d picked up more graphic design work instead. That was fine. It all paid the bills.

  The apartment had become far more Evan since he’d moved in. He hadn’t even done it intentionally. He was used to living in organized chaos, his stuff everywhere, half-finished sketches on every available surface. His fingers twitched to paint the big white wall in the kitchen, to cover it in swirls of color to burst out from the room’s unforgiving monochrome.

  “Where’s Princess?” Scott demanded as he shuffled into the apartment.

  Evan tried not to fuss. Scott was okay to walk, could get to the bathroom on his own now and use the shower. No more bed baths.

  “She’s around here somewhere, I expect,” he murmured and toed off his heavy boots. “Probably sulking. You abandoned her, remember? I’m her favorite now.”

  “Fuck off,” Scott grouched.

  He hung his jacket in the hallway closet (something Evan never did; his always ended up over one of the stools at the breakfast bar) and kicked off his shoes too, then wandered through to the living room. By his cry of delight, Evan assumed feline and human had been reunited.

  Not wanting to get in the way, Evan took the opportunity to make tea for them both, then pulled a skillet from the drawer and started fixing sandwiches.

  “Lacey told me about your badass toasted cheese sandwich skills,” Scott said as he came into the kitchen. Princess was cradled in his arms, butting her head against his jaw and purring manically.

  “Really? When?”

  “At some point over the past few months when I was on the phone to her wailing about how I’d fallen for her current, my former best friend.”

  Evan turned slowly, unable to keep the goofy grin from his face. And he was making an effort to.

  “Seriously?”

  “Yeah.” Scott rubbed his cheek over Princess’s head. “Apparently I fall hard.”

  The kettle whistled, and Scott looked at Evan expectantly, the look on his face clearly indicating he had no intention of putting his cat down. Evan huffed a laugh and turned around to make two mugs of tea.

  “I don’t normally drink hot tea.”

  “I’d noticed. It’s good. It’ll keep you warm.”

  “Did you buy tea?”

  “I’ve been living here for like, over a week, Scott. I’ve bought food, yes.”

  “Did you get to explore the neighborhood?”

  Evan gave him a pointed look. “I ordered groceries online. Got them delivered.”

  “Can you do that here?”

  “Apparently so.”

  “You don’t do that at home.”

  “No. But I’m not going outside in that weather unless it’s absolutely necessary.”

  Scott laughed, apparently delighted, and took a sip of his tea. “Ugh. Not sweet enough.”

  Evan passed him the sugar.

  “So, what now?” he asked. He’d purposefully not brought up Scott’s proposal again, preferring to talk about anything but while Scott recovered. Now, though? Now it was killing him.

  “What do you mean?”

  “Well… when do you need to go back to work? What do you need to do to make the transfer? I don’t want to push you or anything, and I’m more than happy to wait here with you until you’re ready to come home. And where are we going to live? I don’t think I like the idea of you driving, what, seven hours a day
to DC and back. That’s insane. I can work from here for a little while longer, but I really need to get back to a couple of projects before I’m being chased for them. I don’t want to leave you alone.”

  Scott stopped the tirade by stepping up close to Evan, pressing a finger against his lips, then once he’d stopped talking, giving him a soft kiss.

  “Breathe.”

  Evan did, a deep inhale and noisy exhale.

  “It would normally take a couple of months to approve and implement a transfer. However, since I’ve been out of the office for weeks already and they seem to be functioning just fine without me, I’m going to try and get it approved quicker. I’m still covered by my insurance, but this place is fucking expensive, and I can’t afford to live here if I’m not earning.”

  “I can help,” Evan rushed to add.

  “We’ll be fine,” Scott said, shaking his head and reaching up to push his fingers through Evan’s hair. “Honestly. When my mom was here before, she mentioned about helping me buy somewhere.”

  “A house?”

  Scott nodded and sipped his tea. “They did it for Tom when he first moved out. Lacey obviously moved straight in with Anthony, so I’m not sure what the situation is there. It’s not really my place to ask. But I know there’s money set aside from my grandparents for us to put a deposit down on a house.”

  “If I sell mine, then that gives us some more capital. I know it’s gained value since I bought it. Though my mortgage is pretty huge.”

  “As long as you don’t end up losing money on it,” Scott said, nodding. “We could always see if anyone wants to rent it. It would be a nice retirement place, you know.”

  “Yeah,” Evan said absently. He turned back to the stove and started to cook the sandwiches.

  “If you were going to move, where would it be to?”

  “Not Illinois, that’s for damn sure,” Evan muttered.

  Scott put Princess down and wrapped both his arms around Evan’s waist from behind. It felt almost too intimate, too domestic for this still-so-new relationship. He kissed Evan’s shoulder and watched as Evan skillfully flipped the sandwiches over.