After they got the bread from the oven, she taught Mattie how to make butter, and the two of them took turns at the butter churn. It was hard work, but it needed to be done, and she wanted Mattie to know how for when she was gone.
She realized that she was acting as if leaving was a forgone conclusion. She assumed there was no way Andy would want to keep her at the end of the month, and why would he? He was dead set against having her for a wife. Did he not trust her because she wasn’t from the south? Surely he knew the war had been over for twenty years.
*****
Andy worked hard that day, forcing his brothers to match the difficult pace he set. He kept thinking about John and how he’d made it very clear that he would be happy to take her for his wife if things didn’t work out between Andy and Tracy. Why did the other man think he had the right to talk to another man’s wife that way? What was wrong with him?
By the time they went home that evening for supper, he was livid. He was certain Tracy must have done something to make the other man think she was unhappy in her marriage.
When he walked into the house, he was barraged with smells. Good smells. There was a huge bowl of beans on the table that looked like they had bacon mixed through them and a plate of cornbread. He was almost mesmerized by the sights and smells of good food. How could he be angry with a woman who could cook? He washed up quickly and took his place at the head of the table. He waited until the others sat, bowed his head and said the shortest prayer he’d ever said in his life.
Tracy sat bemused as she watched the four members of her new family attack the food like they’d never seen any before. She wasn’t a huge fan of beans, because they had eaten them five nights a week at the orphanage, but she could see the Harveys didn’t have that same prejudice against beans.
There was little talk as they all concentrated on their food. Finally, when every bite had been eaten, Andy leaned back in his chair and patted his stomach. “That was the best meal I’ve had in a long time,” he said with a sigh.
Tracy shook her head. “How did you four survive without someone to cook for you?”
Andy shrugged. “We ate a lot of beef jerky.”
She stood up and walked to the oven, opening it up to remove the cake she’d hidden there. She really hadn’t had time to bake that day, and had sacrificed the time she’d wanted to spend sewing, but it was worth it to see the three male’s faces. Mattie had helped her frost it, so she’d known it was coming, but the other three looked shocked.
“Cake? You baked a cake?”
Tracy shrugged. “I thought it would be good since we just had beans for dinner.”
She served the cake and passed it out to everyone before starting to clear the table. “Aren’t you going to have any?” Andy asked, looking at her with surprise.
“I will after the dishes are done. I’m not all that hungry right this second.” She made quick work of clearing the table. By the time she got the first dish washed, Mattie was beside her holding her hand out to dry it.
“I’m sorry it took me so long to eat my cake, Tracy. I should have helped clear the table.”
Tracy smiled and shook her head. “No, you should have enjoyed your cake.” When Mattie beamed up at her, she said, “We’ll start on the first of your new dresses after we finish the dishes.”
Mattie all but bounced up and down. “I’d like that.”
Tracy kept her ears open to the voices behind her. Once again Andy let the others know what they would be working on the next day. “Tomorrow is branding,” he said.
Arthur groaned. “I hate branding. The smell is awful.”
“Get used to it. We’re a ranching family so we brand the cattle. No choice.” He collected all the plates and took them over to Tracy, trying to do his best to get on her good side once again. “Thank you for supper. It was wonderful.” Would she forgive him?
Tracy said nothing just nodding in acknowledgement of his words as she took the plates from him. She put them into the hot water she was washing the dishes with and kept up her work.
Andy sighed as he took his seat at the table again. He’d talk to her after the others were in bed. With the way she cooked, he knew he wanted to keep her. He regretted his words from the previous night a great deal.
As soon as the dishes were done and put away, Tracy went into her bedroom and brought out the fabric they’d purchased. She carefully used the pattern and cut out the pieces for the first dress. Explaining what she was doing to Mattie through each step and letting the younger girl help where she could, she hoped to teach her to be able to take charge of her home when she left. She knew it was a tall order for a young girl, but Mattie seemed willing to learn all she could.
They had the dress completely cut out by the time she needed to send Mattie to bed. She once again walked up the stairs with her and waited while the girl changed into her nightgown, and then sat on the edge of her bed. Mattie smiled at her. “Thank you for the best day I’ve ever had.”
Tracy smiled. The day had been difficult for her, knowing that she was not wanted and never had been. She’d fought through it though, and could see by the girl’s face that it was a good thing she had. “We’ll do so much more tomorrow.” She leaned down to kiss her forehead. “I’m going to teach you to sew tomorrow.”
Mattie smiled, nodding as her eyes drooped. “Thank you for making my bed so clean.”
They’d managed to wash all the sheets and quilts while the men had been working during the day. Tracy was really proud of all they’d accomplished. They weren’t anywhere near done with the cleaning, but they’d made a good start. In a week, the house would look like it should, and they’d be able to devote more of their time to sewing.
Chapter Four
Once again the boys were in bed by the time Tracy made it back down the stairs. She automatically gathered up the pieces of the dress they’d cut out so she could put them away. She didn’t want to have to deal with any messes first thing in the morning.
Once she was finished, she said, “Good night.”
Before she could close the door to their bedroom, Andy called, “Wait. I want to talk to you before you go to bed.” He’d been thinking about what he wanted to say to her ever since he’d gotten home and seen supper sitting on the table.
Tracy put the things in her hands onto the dresser and walked back into the kitchen, sitting down across from him. “What do you want to talk about?”
Andy stood up and moved so they were sitting closer together. Tracy considered standing up and moving further away from him, but she wasn’t going to be that childish. “I’m sorry I got angry with you in town today. I know that John likes to flirt with every woman he meets, so I shouldn’t have blamed you for what he said and did.”
Tracy shrugged, not liking him sitting so close. She felt herself drawn to him, as she’d imagined she would be when she first agreed to move to Texas as his bride. “It doesn’t matter.”
“Yes, it does. I said some things to you that I shouldn’t have last night. I can see Francis was right. I do need a wife. You’ve already made my home so much better than it was. I want you to stay.” It wasn’t easy for him to ask her to stay after the things he’d said. He felt as if there was a giant lump in his throats that the words had to force their way around.
“I will stay until my month is up, just like I promised.” She got to her feet and pushed the chair back under the table.
Andy didn’t think about what he was doing, he just acted to keep her in his life. His hand reached out and grabbed her by the wrist, pulling her down into his lap. He slipped his arms around her and nuzzled her neck. “That’s not what I’m saying,” he whispered into her ear.
Tracy stiffened. “What are you doing?” Hadn’t they decided he wasn’t going to touch her just the night before? What was his problem?
Andy smiled. “What does it feel like I’m doing? I’m kissing my wife.” He drew her head down to his, and he kissed her softly. “I’ve wanted to do that agai
n ever since I kissed you at our wedding.”
“You have a strange way of showing it.” Tracy tried to keep her voice disapproving, but she couldn’t. She liked what he was doing to her too much. She felt like melting into his lap.
“I’m sorry. I was wrong. Marrying you was the right thing to do.”
Tracy shrugged. “I’m not so sure.” Did he decide it was the right thing to do because he had a decent dinner? Or because the house was clean for a change? She knew he wasn’t overwhelmed by her beauty, because that would have happened the day before.
Andy cupped her face in his hands and drew her down for another kiss, their first real kiss. He kissed her gently, his lips toying with hers. His tongue probed at her lips, asking for permission to enter her mouth.
She let out a low moan and parted her lips, granting him access. Turning her torso so she was facing him fully, she put her hands on his shoulders. She may not like Andy, but she certainly liked his kisses. What was wrong with her that she wanted to be kissed by a man who made it clear he didn’t want her in his life?
He moved his hands up and down her back as his tongue gently explored the inside of her mouth. He pulled her closer to him with her body flush against his.
Tracy was out of breath when she finally broke the kiss, looking into his brown eyes. “I don’t think this is a good idea.”
“We’re married. Why isn’t it a good idea?”
“I’m leaving in a month.” The answer should be obvious. Had he forgotten their agreement?
Andy shook his head. “I don’t want you to go. I want you to stay here with me and be a real wife to me.”
“Because I’m a good cook?” She jumped up from his lap as if he were on fire. “I don’t think so. Good night, Andy.” She rushed from the room and into their bedroom, pulling her nightgown on as quickly as she could. She wasn’t going to agree to stay after the way he’d made it clear he didn’t want her the night before.
She got into bed and covered herself with the sheet, taking up the smallest place possible. She didn’t want to accidentally touch him in her sleep.
Andy sat still for a moment after she left, his body still worked up by their kiss. There was such passion between them that he was shocked she’d been able to run off that way. He groaned. How was he going to spend the night in the same bed with her feeling as worked up as he was without touching her? It would be impossible.
He groaned, walking into the bedroom he shared with her and undressing, noting she was already lying on her side facing away from the center of the bed just as she had the night before. He’d had the courtesy to wear a nightshirt the previous night, but he wasn’t going to do that again. He preferred to sleep in nothing, and his little bride could just get used to that fact. Texas summers were too hot for nightshirts.
He slid between the sheets, debating whether or not he should touch her. He wanted to. He wanted to pull her into his arms and make sweet love to her, making her forget that she wanted to be anywhere in the world other than in his arms.
Instead, Andy shifted to the center of the bed, and put his arms around her, drawing her back against him. He didn’t try to kiss her again, but he could feel by the rigidness of her body that she expected him to. He wrapped his left arm around her waist, not touching her anywhere that she would deem inappropriate and closed his eyes, hoping he’d be able to get at least a little sleep.
Tracy couldn’t figure out what it was that Andy wanted. Was he going to try to make love to her? When he did nothing but hold her in the darkness, she slowly relaxed and let herself enjoy the feeling of being held. No one had ever touched her in a way that made her feel like she was special. She’d never really meant anything to anyone. That’s why his rejection had hurt so badly.
Finally, she relaxed enough to sleep, his arm still around her.
Andy lay awake long after Tracy fell asleep. He had to find a way to convince her that she’d done the right thing marrying him. It wasn’t only his siblings who needed her now. It was him. He had to get her to stay. He wanted to kick himself for his rude words of the previous night.
*****
Tracy awoke the next morning to the feeling of a bug against her cheek. She reached up to swat it away, but instead encountered fingers there. Her eyes opened wide with surprise. Andy was waking her. “Is it time to get up?” she asked, yawning, and hoping he’d let her go.
Her nightgown had ridden up during the night, and she could feel the front of his thighs against the back of hers. Her bottom was barely covered, and she felt something poking her. She didn’t ask what it was. She was afraid to.
“Not quite time to get up,” he whispered. “I thought it would be nice to start our day alone together.” He pulled back a little and turned her onto her back. “You’re beautiful.” He hadn’t been able to help noticing how beautiful she was even when she’d gotten off the train dirty and tired. Now though? She made his heart beat faster. She was perfect in his eyes.
The moon was full and streaming in through the window. The sun hadn’t come up yet, but she knew that it would shortly. “I don’t think this is a good idea, Andy.” She wanted to tell him to kiss her. She wanted to spend time holding him and stroking him. It wasn’t a good idea, though, because he didn’t really want her. He only wanted the food she made.
“What’s not a good idea?” he asked as his fingers trailed along her cheek. He leaned down and very lightly brushed his lips against hers. “This?” His hand found her breast through her nightgown. “Or this?”
Tracy moaned her lips clinging to his. She knew she should just jump out of bed and run to the kitchen, but he felt so good against her. How could she leave him?
She turned to him more fully instead, putting one hand at the back of his neck as he kissed her. She wanted to stay here with him all day.
Andy’s hand gently squeezed her breast, his thumb toying with her nipple through the fabric of her nightgown. She splayed her hands across his back. Would staying be so bad? She liked it here. She liked him when he wasn’t telling her he didn’t want her there.
From outside the door, she heard a loud whisper. “Tracy, it’s time to start breakfast. I’ll collect the eggs.” Mattie. How could she have forgotten about Mattie?
Tracy sighed against his lips, pulling back from Andy. “Mattie’s up. I need to get dressed.”
She rolled away from him, silently thanking Mattie for the interruption. If she had stayed in bed with her husband much longer, there would be no question of whether she could leave or not. She would have to stay.
Andy propped himself up on his elbow and watched his new wife gather her clothes for the day. He waited to see if she’d remove her nightgown in front of him. He’d already gotten a tantalizing glimpse of her bare thigh when she’d climbed from the bed.
She looked over her shoulder at him. “Would you turn your back please?”
Andy smiled. At least she was being polite to him. “No, I really don’t think I will. You’re my wife, and I have every right to see you unclothed.”
Tracy blushed. “You get dressed first then, and I’ll wait.”
He chuckled at that. “I’m not wearing anything under this sheet. You sure you want me to dress first.”
She squeezed her eyes closed tightly, and sat on the bed. “Yes, please.”
He laughed out loud. His hand rubbed her back through her nightgown. “One day, you’ll be happy to see me naked.”
“Please hurry,” she suggested. “I need to start breakfast.” She wasn’t about to comment on his statement about seeing him naked.
He rolled from the bed, and dressed quickly. He didn’t have any more time to torment his wife. He needed to get dressed and get the cow milked. When he was fully clothed, he leaned down and kissed her one last time. “I’ll see you at breakfast.”
As soon as the door closed behind him, Tracy jumped up and pulled her clothes on. She couldn’t believe he’d been so brazen in front of her. What was he thinking? He had suddenly turned
into a different man than the sullen man she’d married. She wasn’t sure if she liked him this way.
Once she was dressed, she went into the kitchen and started a fire in the stove, putting the frying pan on the top with a little bit of butter to melt. She quickly mixed up everything she needed for pancake except the eggs, and as soon as Mattie was in the house with the eggs, she added three. “Good morning, Mattie. We’re having pancakes this morning.”
“Oh! That sounds lovely.” Mattie flew into Tracy’s arms and hugged her tightly. “Ma used to make pancakes for breakfast every Sunday morning. She said they were the only thing that would fill us up enough to sit still through church.”
Tracy laughed. “I’m excited to meet everyone at church. Tomorrow’s Sunday…isn’t it?” She couldn’t believe she’d lost track of the days, but she’d been on the train so long.
Mattie giggled. “Yes, it is Sunday. I want you to meet my friends.”
Tracy smiled at the girl. No one had ever looked up to her the way Mattie did. She was going to have a hard time saying goodbye to her. “I can’t wait to meet them.”
Mattie set the table and put the butter and syrup on while Tracy made the pancakes. She made a pot of coffee for everyone who drank it, knowing she’d probably drink coffee and milk both. She couldn’t meet Andy’s eyes again that morning, but it was for a different reason than the previous morning. She would tell him that night there couldn’t be a repeat of that morning in bed.
After breakfast, she jumped up to start the dishes, mentally going over everything she would have to do that day. She wanted to finish cleaning the downstairs of the house before starting on the upstairs the next day. She wanted to get all the windows washed and the walls scrubbed. Tracy knew Mattie was going to be her little helper.
She had just put the stack of plates into the dishwater to wash when Andy put his hand on her shoulder. When she turned to see what he wanted, he leaned down and kissed her senseless. The kiss was hard, but the warmth spread through her body quickly.
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