No Way Out

by Fern Michaels

  Her ruminating was interrupted by the ding-dong of the back gate opening. Ellie could see from the CCTV that it was Hector. First footsteps, then the back-porch door, then the doorbell.

  Ellie stood straight and calmly approached the laundry room. From there, she swiftly opened the back door. It was like a Band-Aid. Rip it off fast.

  “Hello, Hector.” She gave him a warm smile. She hesitated about a hug, so she put out her hand.

  “Hello.” Hector had a shy look on his face. “I am honored to be invited into your home.”

  “It’s a pleasure. Truly.” Ellie stepped aside to let him pass. “Do come in.”

  “Is now a good time for coffee?” Hector shuffled his feet.

  “Yes, of course.”

  “I suppose I should have left you a note this morning, but I was running late for school.”

  “It’s fine, Hector. I am so glad we can sit and talk. Please come in.” Ellie guided him over to the dining-room table overlooking the porch and the yard beyond.

  He tried not to seem nosy, but he looked around to see how she had decorated the room. Hector had worked with the electrician and helped get the place ready, but he had never been inside after Ellie moved in.

  “You’ve done a beautiful job.” Hector appreciated the minimalist look, which Ellie had warmed up with large plants, several throws on the sofa, and a few large, framed photos of trees and flowers. One photo was an enlarged pink peony, another an iris. Others were close-ups of different-shaped leaves. They were not exactly like the paintings of Georgia O’Keeffe, but the similarity was there. “I really like the photographs,” Hector remarked.

  “Thank you. Photography used to be a hobby of mine,” Ellie replied.

  “Wow.” Hector was doubly impressed.

  “We seem to have a few things in common, Hector. Please, sit down.” She motioned to one of the high-backed, natural rattan chairs. “You and I are gamers, and we also like gardens, trees, plants, and flowers.”

  “That’s true. I hadn’t thought about it. When you asked me to put in a garden, I figured it was because you wanted a nice yard.”

  “I did, and thanks to you, I have one. You did a beautiful job. I enjoy looking at it.”

  Hector was a little nervous. Even though he had been Ellie’s personal assistant for two years, he had never had a face-to-face encounter with her. Before she moved here, all communication was over the Internet. When he was helping her find a place to live and get it ready, they would occasionally speak on the phone. They had Skyped a few times, but their interactions were never in person. This was totally new. Hector was fidgeting. “Is there a problem?”

  “No. Why do you ask?” Ellie was surprised at his question.

  “You’ve never invited me inside before.” Hector’s tone was even.

  “I know, and I apologize. It’s long overdue.” Ellie smiled at him.

  “Is everything all right?” Hector was still unsure why, after all this time, he would be invited in for coffee.

  “Yes, Hector, everything is fine.” She was telling a small lie. Some things were fine. Others not so much, but she didn’t need to get into any of that. She couldn’t. “I’ve been doing a lot of soul-searching.”

  “Do you not want me to come by anymore?” Hector wanted her to get to the point. Was she going to fire him?

  “Oh, Hector. That’s not it at all. I appreciate everything you do for me.” Ellie got up and walked over to the coffee maker. “Coffee?”

  “Yes, thank you.”

  “Regular or decaf?”

  “Regular, please.” He hesitated. “Strong, if you have it.”

  “Coming right up.” She fished in the coffee canister and pulled out several pods. “Hector, you may have noticed that it’s been two years since I moved in, and in all that time, I have never left the house.”

  “Well, yes, but I didn’t think it was any of my business. You’d give me instructions, and I was happy to do whatever you needed. And I especially appreciate the money. It’s going to be a big help when I leave for school.” Maybe that was the problem. It dawned on Ellie that he would be leaving for college in the fall. What would she do without him?

  “I know. And everyone is quite proud of you, I’m sure.” Ellie popped a pod into the Nespresso machine.

  Silence filled the room. It occurred to Ellie that she was on a schedule to either resolve her dark, haunting issue or find a replacement for Hector. She didn’t know which was more challenging.

  She brought the two cups to the table, set them down, and fetched several slices of blueberry pound cake from the counter.

  “Hector, the reason I invited you is because you have been my closest confidant since I moved here. Actually, before I moved here.”

  “You have done lots for me. I could never have sold that game without you. That will help with my tuition, and the money you pay me will pay for housing. I owe you big-time.”

  Ellie laughed softly. “I guess we’re even then.”

  Hector finally started to relax. “This is good. Did you bake it?” Hector knew that blueberry pound cake hadn’t been on any of her grocery lists.

  “Yes, I did. Thank you,” Ellie replied. “Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night and have to do something to busy myself.” She thought about the nightmare the other night. Recently, she had been waking up, but it wasn’t necessarily owing to nightmares.

  “I don’t think I’d have the ambition to bake at three in the morning.” Hector took another bite. “But I’m glad you did!”

  Ellie chuckled. “Hector, I want you to know something.”

  He stopped suddenly and looked up at her, expecting to hear something dreadful. “What is it?”

  “Before I moved here, there was an incident that put me in the hospital. When I woke up, I couldn’t remember what had happened, but there was something in my subconscious that was making me afraid.”

  “Afraid of what?” Hector realized his question was foolish. He smacked himself on the forehead. “Subconscious. Duh. Never mind.”

  Ellie laughed. “My therapist said we bury things we don’t want to remember. The problem is that by burying it, I’m not able to face it and deal with it. That’s why I don’t leave the house. I’m fearful, but I don’t know the root of that fear.”

  Ellie felt a huge burden being lifted by telling someone face-to-face how she was feeling. She then continued her story.

  “After I got out of the hospital, I wanted to get as far away from where I was as I could. That’s when I got in touch with you.”

  Hector was nodding.

  “My family thinks I’m working for a government contractor and moving from country to country.” Ellie paused.

  “You mean they don’t know where you are?” Hector was stunned.

  “No.”

  “How come?”

  “Because I don’t remember anything, and I didn’t know whom to trust.”

  “Not even your mother?” Hector was aghast at the thought of someone not trusting their own mother.

  “It’s not like that. Since I don’t know what happened, I needed to find what some people would call a safe house. I had to put enough space between me and everyone I knew, just in case. I entered into a sort of witness protection program, so no one could know where I was.” Ellie paused.

  “In case of what?” Hector was trying to figure out where this was going.

  “In case what happened to me might put someone else in danger.”

  “How would that be?”

  “That’s the point. If I can’t remember, then I can’t keep my family safe by warning them.”

  Hector was still confused. “Let me see if I understand. Something happened to you. You don’t remember what, but it scared you somehow. You needed to get away from the situation to sort things out.”

  “Hector that’s exactly what’s going on.”

  “Have you figured out any of it yet?” Hector’s curiosity was growing.

  “Only that I stil
l have occasional nightmares and migraines.”

  Hector nodded again, sorting through what Ellie had just told him.

  “Do you have a therapist?” Hector stopped himself. “I’m sorry, that’s none of my business.”

  “Hey, I brought up all this psychological mumbo-jumbo, so don’t apologize,” Ellie reassured him. She also wondered if the conversation was getting too intense for an eighteen-year-old. But Hector was no average teenager. “Yes, there is someone I speak to a couple of times a month.”

  “Has it helped?”

  “You’re sitting in my house, aren’t you?” Ellie teased.

  Hector looked around. “Yep. So is this all your stuff from where you came from?”

  “No. I gave up my apartment and put my things in storage. I had to made it look like I was going away for a while, which is true, to a certain extent.” She looked around the living space. “That’s why it’s a little sparse. I had some of my photos blown up to give it some color and hoped that looking at them might trigger my memory. But I had taken those a year before the incident, so they’re not helping me recover my memory. Probably just as well. They actually give me comfort.

  “Anyway, I’ve been thinking that just because I can’t or won’t leave the house, that doesn’t mean I can’t have a friend over. I love Buddy and Percy, but they’re not the best conversationalists. Though I do appreciate that they don’t talk back. Well, in all honesty, sometimes Buddy does.” Ellie smiled.

  “I’m glad you think of me as a friend.” Hector smiled back.

  “So much so that you are the very first person I invited in.”

  Hector seemed surprised, but knew it had to be true, unless she was sneaking people in when he wasn’t around. “Wow. I am honored.” And he meant it.

  “I couldn’t think of anyone else better than you, Hector. You have been a lifesaver. Probably in more ways than one.”

  Hector started to blush. “Thank you. I enjoy working for you.”

  “And the garden?” Ellie looked out the window. “It’s absolutely beautiful. I’m glad you suggested that seating area in the back. Last weekend, Jackson fell asleep on the swing with Buddy lying underneath. It was a sweet sight.”

  “Jackson is a very good kid. I’m glad he has Buddy to play with. I felt really bad when I heard about Mrs. Haywood and the trouble she had with Mr. Haywood.”

  “Yeah, that’s kind of a mess right now, but I think things will smooth over in a while.”

  “Really?” Hector knew from some other kids at school that a divorce could be awful for everyone involved. Even people on the fringe.

  “I think so. Just a feeling I have. Jackson had a good day with his father and grandmother. At least that wasn’t traumatic.

  “He had a nightmare that night, but his mother thinks it was because he was upset when his grandmother dropped Mitchel off at his brother’s house.”

  Ellie cut another piece of pound cake for Hector.

  “It’s gotta be rough on a little kid.”

  “It’s a lot to absorb and understand. When things like this happen, children tend to blame themselves. Why, I don’t know. Maybe it’s because they don’t have a lot of different reference points.” Ellie hoped she wasn’t too far over Hector’s head.

  “Well, sure. It’s Mama and Papa, and family. School. Not a big universe to draw from.” Hector was rather astute.

  “You are very impressive, my dear.” Ellie wasn’t lying this time. Those lies were saved for the big issues.

  “It’s like playing a video game. You have so many players in a universe. The more players, the more you have to figure out how to deal with them.”

  “I like your analogy, Hector.” Ellie took a sip of her coffee, which had gone cold. She drank it anyway.

  “I know there are people who think that video games are a waste of time, but for me, it challenges my mind. You have to think and react fast.”

  “And that’s why you’re so good at it,” Ellie reminded him.

  “Yes, but you’re better.” Hector gave her a thumbs-up.

  “I’ve had more practice.”

  The back gate buzzed. It was Jackson arriving for his daily visit. Ellie walked over to the intercom. “Hey, Jackson! How was your day?”

  “Hey, Ms. Bowman. It was OK. My mom made me walk with the new girl this morning. She’s all right, I guess. But she sure does talk a lot.”

  Ellie laughed. “Most girls do at that age, unless they’re really shy.”

  “I don’t think she’s shy. She was talkin’ up a storm both ways. To and from school.”

  “Maybe she was excited. This is all new to her.”

  “I guess.” He shrugged. Ellie buzzed him in. Jackson and Buddy ran to greet each other.

  “I think that’s the longest conversation I’ve ever had with him.” Ellie watched from the window. “Hmm.”

  “What?”

  “This is a big day for me. I invited you for coffee. I had a conversation with Jackson that exceeded two sentences. I’m making progress.” She sat back down at the table and turned her chair so she could see outside and speak to Hector. “I love to watch the two of them play. Jackson has been great for Buddy.”

  “I’m sure Buddy has been good for Jackson, too.” Hector checked the time on the microwave. “I better get going. I promised my mother I’d stop at the store for some Adobo. Thank you very much for inviting me. I feel honored.”

  “You’re very special to me, Hector.”

  “And you are to me. And my family. They appreciate the trust you put in me.” Hector resisted the temptation to give her a hug. “My father said it’s helping to build character.”

  “And you’re helping me to build confidence.”

  Hector stopped. “Seriously? You are awesome sauce!”

  Ellie laughed out loud. “Thank you, Hector. Give my regards to your mother. Did you tell her you were coming here for coffee?”

  Hector looked a little embarrassed. “Not yet. I wasn’t sure if you were going to fire me, and I didn’t want her to worry.”

  “Fire you?” Ellie guffawed. “As if.”

  “I didn’t know.” Hector shrugged.

  “Well, now you can tell her. And also tell her I said she should be enormously proud of you.” Ellie placed her hand on Hector’s shoulder. There have been studies on how important hugs are, and how they trigger endorphins in the brain. Hugs also release dopamine and serotonin that boost one’s mood and relieve symptoms of depression. She didn’t think hugging Hector was appropriate, but a hand on the shoulder was good enough. Her mood had been elevated. Perhaps it was his company, or perhaps the major breakthrough she had had by inviting him in. Whichever it was, she knew she was on the right track. If only her momentum continued, her life might eventually achieve a normal different from that of the past two years.

  Chapter Twenty-nine

  It had been a full week since Mitchel had been on a bender. He had limited his drinking to two beers a day rather than two six-packs or a pint of whiskey, or both. He had also started wearing a nicotine patch to help him stop smoking. It occurred to him that heavy drinking and heavy smoking went hand in hand. The less he did of one, the less he would do of the other. Much to his surprise, it wasn’t as hard as he thought it might be, or as hard as he kept telling himself it would be. No more excuses. He knew he had to get himself together if he ever wanted a lasting relationship with his son.

  The day they had spent together was a real eye-opener for him. He couldn’t recall the last time he had spent a few sober hours with Jackson, and Saturday felt good. He was still contemplating what had happened with his mother. He knew the change in her mood had helped considerably.

  He winced when he thought about the exchange with Lucinda. Seeing her in daylight, and being sober to boot, was a real eye-opener for him. It was as if he were remembering someone else’s life. In retrospect, it was embarrassing to recall their previous relationship. When she had sauntered over to their table, his first impulse was
to drink two shots of anything eighty proof or more. But looking at his son’s face, seeing the innocence in it, stopped him from stepping off the straight and narrow. He thought he had handled the situation well. Of course, the look on his mother’s face was another story. If looks could kill, he and Lucinda would both be at the coroner’s office. He gave a wry laugh at that scenario and shuddered. Thinking back to the time of his philandering, he couldn’t blame Colleen for her hostility. He was rarely home, and when he was, he was invariably in a foul mood. He wasn’t sure what the trigger was that had turned him into a worthless drunk, but he had decided that he was not going to be that guy anymore.

  He thought about his own father. What little he could remember was that he was a mild-mannered, hardworking man. He would get up at the crack of dawn and tend the fields. Dinner was often the only time he saw his father, but it was usually a pleasant occasion unless his mother had an ax to grind, which happened frequently. Even so, his father would softly address her and remind her, “Not in front of the children.” That, too, could set her off. He thought about it some more. Maybe the problem had been that she didn’t feel appreciated or fulfilled. Having two sons didn’t mean a person had a sense of self-worth. Anyone, well almost anyone, could bear a child. Three hundred million Americans were proof. Then there was the rest of the world. He then realized she was saddled with raising two boys, essentially on her own, as well as trying to keep the farm afloat. He unexpectedly viewed her in a different light. She was, after all, a human being,

  He went over to the small set of weights in the corner of the basement and did a few sets. He was determined to continue on his mission to be a better person, for himself and his son.

  Mitchel knew there was little hope for reconciliation with Colleen. He had done too much damage. But if he could rehabilitate himself, perhaps they could have a civilized relationship for Jackson’s sake. Mitchel believed that if he could become a decent human being once again, he and Colleen could work together and raise their son. Even if it was in two different households.