“Ben told us how you tried to trick him,” Brad spoke. “Trying to turn him sissy like you.”
“Heard you messed up Rosie so bad, she thinks she’s a dyke now!” Mike added. “What a damn waste.”
Rome couldn’t think of what to say, so he just looked at Ben. How could he just stand there, in his team jacket no less? Wasn’t he supposed to be Rome’s friend? Ben didn’t even meet his eye. He just looked down at his phone like this was a perfectly casual meeting.
“Come on, guys,” Rome said, trying to reason with them. “You know it doesn’t work that way.”
As Mike and Brad got closer, Ben still stood, looking away.
“Come on! It’s me!” Rome pleaded with Ben. “How can you —”
Rome didn’t get a chance to finish his thought. Mike grabbed his collar and pulled back a fist, preparing to hit him square on.
Just then, Julian yanked on Rome, hard. He managed to slip Rome out of Mike’s grasp. Julian and Rome began to run back toward the street.
“Only sissies run!” Brad called out.
“Pussy!” Mike echoed.
The words stung, but nothing mattered more to Rome than getting out of this with Julian alive. Rome was faster and got a few steps ahead. He reached back to grab Julian’s hand, but he grasped at thin air. There was a cracking noise as the wooden bat smacked like it had just hit a home run. Rome spun and saw Julian falling while Brad prepared to strike a second blow. Ben just watched out of the corner of his eye.
Julian didn’t move. But he didn’t have to. Rome threw himself on the attackers. Acting completely on impulse and adrenaline, he knocked the bat out of Brad’s hands. Rome got in a punch at Mike, aiming for his face but instead landing it in his beefy neck. Brad grabbed Rome by his shoulders and pulled him off Mike, throwing Rome against a broken gravestone. Rome felt a pang as his back hit it.
Fists were beating into him. Rome covered his face with his forearms. He looked in desperation at Ben, thinking Please, don’t do this. But his so-called friend was already walking away.
As the punches turned to kicks, Rome coughed up something dark, warm, and wet. Every new pain only made Rome more furious. He wanted to punch back. He wanted to bite, to pull their hair out by its roots. He rolled onto his side and kicked out. He felt his foot land against Brad’s crotch. That sent Brad falling back, shouting, clutching his groin. Mike paused for a second to see the damage done. Rome felt a moment of satisfaction. But it didn’t last long. Both attackers turned back to Rome in an even greater rage.
Suddenly, from behind Mike and Brad, Julian appeared. He was holding the bat in both hands and swinging it wildly. He ran at Brad but, before he could land a hit, Mike stepped in. He socked Julian in the stomach, making him crumple with a whimper. Rome tried to get up but his body screamed in pain.
“Faggot,” Mike spat at Julian. The word pierced the air. As Rome bled onto a stranger’s grave, he wondered if that might very well be the last word he ever heard.
The two attackers turned back to Rome and began to kick again. Rome tried to see through their blows, tried to grab a glimpse of Julian. The world felt like it was turning upside down. He prayed silently, Please, let Julian be safe. Was it possible that Julian had escaped? A thought wormed its way into his mind. Maybe he’s already dead. It was all so unreal. Could it just be some terrible dream? Had Julian ever even been there at all?
19
Recuperation
Somewhere in the distance, Rome heard familiar voices. Someone was saying his name. “Where’s Romeo?”
Rome winced as a smile rolled across his battered face. Julian was there, looking at him from a hospital bed next to Rome’s own.
“You’re alive,” Julian gasped. His eyes welled up with tears.
“I promised . . . I wouldn’t leave you,” Rome croaked.
Angie was watching over them both. Moving to Rome’s side, she pulled up his blankets and offered him some ice chips.
“How did we . . .” Rome tried to ask. But his throat was burning.
“Just rest,” Angie said in her nurse’s tone.
“We were worried when you didn’t come back,” came a voice from the other side of the room. Rome painfully rolled his head. There was his mother, sitting by the door. “We tracked your phone.” She spoke in a tone that implied he should be thankful. Rome grimaced. Even if they had helped in the end, it still felt like a violation.
An awkward tension filled the room. Rome glanced from his mother, to Angie, to Julian. Finally, he rested his gaze on his own body. His torso was secured in some sort of plastic cast. His head felt heavy, like he hadn’t had enough sleep. And his mouth was dry again already, despite the ice chips.
It was hard for Rome to stay awake. He was glad to find that no one expected him to. He drifted off, resting a little easier knowing Julian was next to him.
***
When Rome awoke again, Julian was still there and Angie was reading a book in one of the visitor’s chairs. Rome’s mother was gone. But soon enough, other visitors took her place.
Marty came in, looking sheepish. His head hung low as he cautiously approached Rome’s bedside. “Hey, buddy,” he said softly.
“Hey,” Rome groaned back. “It’s good to see you, man.”
Marty’s eyes were red. He was clearly on the verge of tears. Rome guessed it was probably not for the first time that day. “You too,” Marty choked out before he started to break down. “I’m so sorry, Rome, I shoulda — I thought —”
Rome managed to give him a smile. “It’s cool, Marty. It’s cool.”
“I always — I knew —” Marty tried to talk, his voice cracking every few breaths. “Ben could get, you know, but I never . . . I never thought . . .”
Rome nodded. “You know, it’s not your fault.”
Marty looked back up at Rome. A dribble of snot ran out his nose and came dangerously close to his busted-up lip. Jumping forward, he wrapped Rome in a big hug. Then he pulled back quickly when he realized how bandaged up Rome really was. “Oh, shit, I’m sorry, I —”
Rome winced and let out a laugh. “I’m glad you’re here, dude.” Even with Marty in such a somber mood, it was nice to have the company.
Marty managed to smile back, getting up to greet Julian. “I brought you guys a card,” he explained, “From me and Guyna.”
Rome smirked. I guess those two spent a lot of time together last night, eh?
The painkillers made Rome groggy again, and he happily slipped back into sleep. The times he woke up, Angie and Julian were always there. But his mother had yet to come back. He thought about asking Angie if she had been by while he was asleep, but decided against it.
***
Rome was pretty sure it was his second day in the hospital when Rose and Lyla arrived. They brought with them chocolates, pillows, and balloons. Rose instantly ran to Rome’s side. She fussed over his cuts and bruises, saying, “Oh, Romie!”
“Hey, Rose,” croaked Rome. “Thanks for coming.”
“Of course!” she cried out. She put her hand over his arm. “Romie, you know I love you, right?” She gently patted his head. “You’re like a brother to me!”
“Same,” he managed to say, getting her to laugh.
Rose was full of stories and sweet treats, while Lyla chatted with Julian. “It’s good to have company,” Rome murmured before drifting back into his dreamless, painkiller sleep.
The next time he woke, he turned to watch Julian. Rome wished they could be closer. I just wanna hold his hand, he thought. His chest ached with desire — and probably also because of a broken rib or two. As he sank back into his pillow, there was a presence at his side. His mother was standing there. Her arms were crossed and she looked pensive.
“Uh, hi, Mom,” said Rome.
She cautiously put her hand on his. Rome didn’t want her close, but didn’t want to push her away
either. He felt Angie and Julian’s eyes on them both.
“Romeo,” she said, in nearly a whisper. “I knew this would happen.”
“This. You knew this exact thing would happen?” Angie asked from across the room.
Rome smirked a little, thankful that Angie could say what he couldn’t. His mother bristled, ignoring Angie and Julian.
Why can’t she just be a normal, comforting mother, for like five minutes? Rome moaned internally. Maybe she already did her five minutes, while I was passed out, and I missed it.
“Mom . . .” His throat was dry as he tried to speak to her. “I’m . . .” He wanted to say he was sorry. But he caught himself, not sure what he was sorry for. Leaving after she and his father had refused to listen? Being in love with Julian? Being attacked by a couple of homophobic thugs led by his ex-best-friend? “Where’s Dad?” he asked instead.
“He’s not comfortable seeing you right now,” his mother answered.
Rome felt his cheeks going red. Not comfortable? He didn’t feel comfortable? Rome heard Angie huff in disapproval.
“Give him some time,” said Rome’s mother, gently squeezing his hand. He turned away, still furious, wanting nothing more than to pull away from her. But he couldn’t bring himself to do it. And not just because he was all bandaged up. “I’m here,” she told him. “And I love you.”
Rome sighed and relented. “I love you too, Mom.” Turning back, he swore he could see the hint of a tear in her eye.
“Rome!” A voice shouted from the door. Lawrence ran in and rushed to his bedside. He was followed by more footsteps, sharp sounds that were oddly familiar. “Do you need anything, buddy?” Lawrence asked, breathing heavily, like he’d run the whole way to the hospital. “Water? Food? More blankets?”
As Lawrence fussed over him, Rome saw his mother back away and hover awkwardly by the door. He wanted to call after her, but he was already getting sleepy again.
The guidance counsellor shook his head. “I always knew Ben had his troubles. And Mike and Brad certainly were a challenge when they were in school. But this . . .” Lawrence gave Rome a pained look. For a moment Rome felt tempted to comfort him. But then he was annoyed by the very impulse. He was quite done making other people feel better for this.
“I’m not surprised,” Rome said simply. All fell silent for a while. Really, he wasn’t.
“And . . .” Lawrence hesitated. “I’m sorry, but there’s more bad news.”
“What could be worse than this?” Rome asked.
Lawrence looked at Rome like he was an injured puppy. “It’s your locker. It’s been . . . defaced. We’re fixing it as fast as we can, I promise.”
Rome scowled. “What is their problem?” His body hurt, his head was pounding, his mouth was dry, and he was sick of this shit.
“This is just like when I went to high school,” Julian sighed. “Maybe we’re just not meant for it.”
“Not if I have a say about it,” said another voice. Suddenly, the stern face of the vice principal came into Rome’s field of view.
Rome spoke up in surprise. “Mrs. Duke, what are you doing here?”
Julian turned to Rome. “You know her too?”
“She’s the vice principal at my school. Wait — how do you know her?”
Angie snorted. “Don’t you watch the news?”
Rome’s head began to spin. This was too much to take in. Or maybe he was dreaming again. Mrs. Duke was saying something, apologizing for what happened. She seemed to be telling him something important. “Your suspension has been lifted,” he heard, as if from a distance. “Clearly, we misunderstood the situation.”
“Uh, thanks.” Rome nodded.
“Mrs. Montague,” said the vice principal. Rome blinked.He had nearly forgotten his mother was still standing there after all of Lawrence’s fussing. Mrs. Duke turned, motioning to Julian’s mom. “Angie.” “Would you join me in the hall? I have something I’d like to discuss.”
“If it’s about us, just say it to us!” Julian piped up.
“I’m not so sure that’s a good idea,” Mrs. Duke was saying.
Rome couldn’t hold on any longer. His body needed rest again. He welcomed the easy out from this bizarre situation.
20
Together
“Romeo, are you awake?”
Rome’s eyes blinked open. He smiled up at Julian. “I am now.”
He could feel Julian’s fingers running through his hair. Rome groaned a little in thanks. It was good to be close again.
“I talked to Mrs. Duke,” Julian explained. “She had something she wanted to ask our moms. But I told them it should be up to us.”
“What is it?” asked Rome. Right now, he’d do just about anything to stay close with Julian.
Julian leaned down and kissed Rome’s head. “Oh, my Romeo,” he whispered. “I’m so glad . . . I was so scared you were . . .”
Rome breathed in Julian’s sweet smell and let it out in a little sigh. “Me too.” He watched Julian’s eyes, basking in their deep, warm brown. Everything would be all right, as long as they could be together. He almost didn’t want to break the moment, but Julian had piqued his curiosity. “What did they want you to ask me?”
“Right,” said Julian. “Well, you know how my mom does all that political stuff?”
“Yeah.” Rome nodded.
“She and Joanna Duke — I guess Mrs. Duke to you — they’ve been doing this big thing,” Julian explained. “A campaign, trying to get schools in Duke’s division to have a course on gender and sexuality and stuff, something to make it easier for . . . people like us.”
Rome managed to shrug a little. “Cool.”
“Yeah.” The hint of a smirk crossed Julian’s face. “Kinda cool. And they want us to help. They’ve got some big rally on Saturday, and they want us to be there. Maybe to take pictures and say something to the crowd.”
Rome’s stomach turned. “And, uh, what do you think?”
“Well, I don’t know. My mom was pretty into it. No surprise. Your mom, not so much.”
“No surprise.” Rome tried to smile through his nerves. “Well, do you want to?”
“It’s kind of scary, don’t you think? Putting ourselves out there like that. I’ve never done anything like it before.” Julian started playing with Rome’s hair again.
Rome reached for Julian’s hand. “I know you could do it,” he said as they intertwined their fingers.
Julian smiled and glanced down at Rome’s bandaged body. “I don’t want to make you do anything you’re not ready for. And, I mean, what if somebody you know saw us?”
“I don’t care.” Rome’s voice was firm.
Julian looked up at him, eyes wide. “Really? But what about . . . ?”
Rome pulled Julian’s hand to his chest and rested it over his heart. “I’m not afraid anymore. I mean, I’d say things have gone pretty much as bad as they could.” They both chuckled a little. “But the good news is, I really don’t care anymore. I just want us to be together. And I want to be brave, like you.”
Julian kissed his cheek. “Are you sure?”
Rome nodded. It didn’t matter if people didn’t understand. He didn’t even care if his parents didn’t come around. He was going to be okay. “You make me better at being me,” said Rome, holding Julian close. “I want to do it. Let’s show everyone how strong love can really be.”
Julian nodded and gave Rome a shy smile. “Okay, let’s do it. Let’s go out there and change the world.”
“Together,” Rome agreed.
Acknowledgements
So many people made this book possible — including you, the reader! Thanks so much for helping this story come to life!
I’d like to give special appreciation to Shane Camastro, for supporting the stories of Romeo & Julian, even when they were still j
ust daydreams.
A big hug for Kat Mototsune — thank you for editing this text. Your support, guidance, and kindness were all essential for my writing process.
Thank you to Louis Esmé. Your feedback on this story was essential. I will forever be thankful for both your honesty and friendship.
Bridget Liang, your collaboration and comradeship made writing so much richer! I know you will continue to make amazing things.
Much love to all the Phoenix Nest — past, present, and future! Thank you for taking care of each other, laughing together, and living out all that real love can be.
Thanks to all my holos back in the day in Winnipeg. You were the best friends a messed up teen like me could ever ask for. And special shout out to Ariyanna - you’ll always be my big sister.
Thank you, Iris Robin, for all your comments, questions, ideas, and enthusiasm! You’re a truly fabulous friend.
Many thanks to Kate Welsh, your brainstorming sessions and helpful ideas are all over this work.
Sienna Rachelle — many thanks to you, and all your family, for being absolutely weird and wonderful.
All my love to Andrew McAllister — your companionship means the world to me. And to Hannah Dees — I can’t wait for us to start our family together.
Finally, Bill & Cheryl Telford, Tony Harwood-Jones, and Heather Dixon. You have both literally and figuratively made me who I am today. Thank you for everything.
Acknowledgements
So many people made this book possible — including you, the reader! Thanks so much for helping this story come to life!
I’d like to give special appreciation to Shane Camastro, for supporting the stories of Romeo & Julian, even when they were still just daydreams.
A big hug for Kat Mototsune — thank you for editing this text. Your support, guidance, and kindness were all essential for my writing process.
Thank you to Louis Esmé. Your feedback on this story was essential. I will forever be thankful for both your honesty and friendship.
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