Juliet Dove, Queen of Love

by Bruce Coville

  “Eris must have done something,” said Juliet.

  “Eris?” asked Cupid in alarm.

  “We think she’s the one who gave me the amulet to begin with.”

  “This is not good news. If Eris has her hand in this, trouble is sure to follow.”

  But though they talked for another hour, none of them could think of what to do next. Finally, yawning broadly, Byron shuffled off to his own room. Juliet, too exhausted to stay awake, closed the amulet and fell into a fitful sleep filled with dreams in which boys with the heads of rats chased her down the street, trying to kiss her.

  When she awoke, she found Roxanne and Jerome sleeping next to her on her pillow. “Good grief!” she cried in astonishment. “What happened to you two?”

  THIRTEEN

  Cupid’s Little Helpers

  Jerome stretched and yawned. “Sheesh, couldn’t you wake a guy up a little more gently?” he complained, not even opening his eyes. “I was having this great dream about—”

  “Jerome,” interrupted Juliet. “ You’ve . . . you’ve got wings!”

  The rat opened one eye. “What are you talking about?” he asked drowsily. Then he looked across the pillow and sprang to his feet. “Roxanne! She’s not kidding. You’ve got wings!”

  Roxanne was on her hind legs now, staring wildly at Jerome. “So do you!” she cried. “So do you!”

  Indeed, during the night both rats had sprouted wings. Not bat wings, as might have been expected for a pair of rodents. These wings were small, white, and feathery. They looked like something you might see on a Valentine’s Day card made for a rat.

  “Hey!” cried Roxanne as she fluttered her wings and lifted a couple of inches off the pillow. “They work!” Delight and fear seemed to chase each other across her face. “I’m flying!”

  A moment later Jerome was in the air as well. Soon the two rats were flitting about the room, laughing merrily as they discovered the joys of flight.

  “Stop!” cried Juliet. “We’ve got to figure out what’s going on here!”

  That’s easy enough, said Cupid, speaking directly into her mind. I told you my powers would be rising now that I am awake. I’m afraid this is my fault.

  “Why aren’t you talking out loud?” asked Juliet, clutching the sides of her head again.

  Because you closed the amulet. Besides, I thought it would be easier if you and I could talk about certain things without the rats listening in. Why don’t you try to answer me back the same way? It shouldn’t be hard.

  “But I don’t want you in my head!”

  You may before the day is over!

  “Let’s deal with one thing at a time,” said Juliet. She opened the amulet so Cupid could speak out loud, then said, “Did you really do this to Roxanne and Jerome?”

  “Not on purpose,” came the voice from the amulet. “In fact, I had no idea it was happening until I heard you shouting. Even so, it does seem likely that their metamorphosis is a result of my power seeking a way to be free in the world. Until I can be loosed from the amulet, Roxanne and Jerome will be representing me.”

  Suddenly Juliet noticed a tiny harp laying on her pillow, right where Roxanne had been sleeping. As she watched, a miniature bow took shape in the spot where Jerome had been. She hesitated to mention these things to the rats. She didn’t need to. They came swooping back as if they sensed that the items had appeared.

  “Presents!” cried Roxanne. Snatching up the harp, she ran her claws over it. A cascade of beautiful music poured out. Juliet felt a swelling in her heart, as if she were filled with a deep, all encompassing love that had nowhere to go.

  Meanwhile Jerome was hovering over his place on the pillow. “A bow and arrow!” he cried happily. “I always wanted one of them!”

  “Don’t you dare shoot me with that thing!” commanded Juliet.

  “Aw, I wouldn’t shoot you, Juliet,” said Jerome. Then, sounding disappointed, he said, “Besides, I’ve only got one arrow. I’d better save it for when I really need it.”

  You may tell him there will be as many arrows as he needs, said Cupid, speaking directly into Juliet’s mind once more. Each time he lets fly an arrow, another will take its place. It’s part of the magic of the bow.

  “I’m not sure I want him to know that,” muttered Juliet.

  “Know what?” asked Jerome.

  She sighed. “You’ll have as many arrows as you need. They replace themselves magically.”

  “Wowza! This is going to be fun!”

  “You’d better be careful,” warned Juliet. “It could also be dangerous.”

  “What could be dangerous?” asked Roxanne, doing a backward somersault two feet above Juliet’s dresser. “We’re Cupid’s little helpers, spreading love wherever we go!”

  “That’s what’s so dangerous!” cried Juliet. “Love is nothing to mess around with!”

  I fear this is going to be a difficult day, said Cupid, still speaking to her directly. I think—

  His words were cut off by a voice at the door.

  “Juliet, what the heck is going on in here?”

  It was Margaret. She was just outside Juliet’s room, holding the sluggarium. Her hair this morning was flame red. Juliet waited for her sister to scream at the sight of the flying rats, but Margaret just stood there, gazing at Juliet with a puzzled expression. “I heard you reciting. Are you going to do a poem at the jam after all? That would sure make Dad happy.”

  Juliet looked for Roxanne and Jerome. They were hovering near the head of her bed. Didn’t Margaret see them?

  “I’m . . . trying to work out something I have to do for school,” said Juliet. This was close to the truth, since she was going to have to go to school in about an hour, and she was fairly sure Roxanne and Jerome would be going with her.

  Roxanne fluttered across the room. Hanging in the air just above Margaret’s head, she strummed her harp. Beautiful music flowed out. Though it was clear to Juliet that her sister could not actually hear the notes, Margaret’s face softened. With a gentle smile, she said, “Well, if you want help reading lines or anything, just let me know. I’ll be glad to work with you.” She looked down at the sluggarium. “Come on, kids. Time for your morning bath!”

  As soon as Margaret was gone, Juliet closed her door. Speaking more softly than she had before, she said, “Cupid! How come Margaret couldn’t see Jerome and Roxanne?”

  “I’m sure you’ve heard the saying that love is blind,” replied Cupid. “That got started partly because those of us who specialize in it are often invisible.”

  Juliet looked at the pair of winged rats—invisible winged rats who were carriers of irresistible love—and put her hand over the amulet. “How did I get myself into this?” she muttered.

  Cupid did not answer.

  Byron came to her door next. “Where’s Roxanne and Jerome?” he asked, looking around.

  “You mean you can’t see them, either?” asked Juliet.

  He shook his head, looking puzzled then astonished as Juliet explained the latest development. When she was done, he stared around the room and said, “Hey, Jerome and Roxanne, I wish I could still see you!”

  “They’re here,” said Juliet, gesturing with her thumbs. “Just over my shoulders.” She listened for a second, then said, “Roxanne says to tell you that you’re a very nice boy, and she hopes you don’t think it’s rude of her to be invisible.”

  Because the kitchen floor remained a work in progress, the Doves ate breakfast in the dining room. Jerome and Roxanne hovered in a corner. Juliet could tell that Jerome was longing to use his bow and arrow, but there were no good targets—until Queen Baboo de la Roo came strolling into the room.

  “Oh, look,” said Mr. Dove. “It’s the furry land whale!”

  The cat waddled over to Margaret to beg for a tidbit—a habit that distressed Mr. Dove no end—then went to sit under the buffet. Jerome and Roxanne, clearly enjoying the fact that they were invisible to everyone but Juliet, fluttered down for a clos
er look at the feline.

  At that moment a mouse came scurrying along the wall.

  Queen Baboo started up. Juliet was tempted to go after the mouse herself, in the desperate hope that she might be able to teach it to roar. She held herself back. Queen Baboo, of course, had no such sense of restraint. But just as the cat was about to lunge for the little creature, Jerome loosed his love arrow. The tiny dart disappeared in Queen Baboo’s shaggy gray fur. Instantly the cat stopped, flopped onto her side, and began to purr.

  The mouse scuttled into a hole in the wall.

  Queen Baboo stared after it longingly. Patting at the wall with her paw, she let out a heartbroken “Miao!”

  It was about the most pathetic sound Juliet had ever heard.

  “Score one for the rodents!” cried Jerome, doing a little victory dance in midair.

  Juliet noticed that his bow already had another arrow in it.

  When it was time to leave for school, Juliet decided to go out the front way, rather than crossing the backyard to walk with Arturo. As she opened the door to leave, she saw three bouquets on the front steps. Rolling her eyes she scooped them up and carried them to the trash can, pointedly not looking at the notes that said who they were from.

  “What did you do that for?” asked Roxanne, who was hovering just above Juliet’s left shoulder. “They were pretty!”

  “Because I don’t want to encourage anyone,” said Juliet grimly.

  “Encouraging people is nice.”

  “Not when the cause is hopeless,” growled Juliet.

  Henry Patterson, the third grader from down the street, was waiting for her at the corner.

  “Hi, Juliet,” he said shyly.

  “Hi, Henry,” she replied, relieved to talk to a male who wasn’t in love with her. At least she thought that was the case, until Henry held out a Snickers bar and said adoringly, “I got this for you.”

  Juliet had an urge to grab the candy and stomp on it. But Henry was so cute that she couldn’t bring herself to do that, so she just said, “Thank you, Henry, that was very nice of you,” and tucked the gift into her backpack.

  “I wish I could go to school with you,” called Henry as Juliet started to walk away. Looking over her shoulder, she saw a tear trickling down his cheek.

  “Did you shoot that poor little kid with one of those stupid arrows?” she muttered to Jerome once they were a few yards away.

  “Are you kidding? That would have been a complete waste of a perfectly good arrow. You’ve already got all the love power you need. More than you need!”

  “Can’t you do anything about this, Cupid?” she whispered, grabbing the amulet.

  I am what I am, replied the love god. As long as I’m in the amulet, and as long as it is locked around your neck, you will command this kind of attention. The sooner you can get me out, the better, at least if ending the attention is what you really want.

  Little as she liked the idea, Juliet decided this was the time to try speaking to him mind to mind. It’s what I want! she thought fiercely.

  Good. Then we’ll try to figure out how to find a mouse that can roar. In the meantime I’ll try as best I can to keep my effects under control. You’d better do the same thing for the rats!

  Believe me, I have no control over what those two do.

  The mental conversation was interrupted by a shout from Jerome, who was fluttering somewhere to Juliet’s right. “Yahoo!” he cried. “Direct hit!”

  Juliet turned and was appalled to see the mailman chasing Henry’s mother down the street.

  “Jerome!” said Juliet fiercely. “You stop that right this instant!”

  He grinned. “Sorry. Just wanted to see how it works on humans!”

  By the time Juliet got to school, she had a trail of nearly two dozen boys behind her. She was doing her best to ignore them, but as she walked down the hall, she realized that the female portion of the student body was giving her a lot of nasty glances. More than once she saw clusters of girls whispering together. They would break apart when they noticed her approaching and pretend that nothing was going on, but Juliet was sure they were talking about her.

  “What the heck is going on with the boys?” asked Elizabeth, just before they went into class. “Did you find some secret love potion on the Internet?”

  Before Juliet could answer—and she had no idea what to say, anyway—Bambi and Samantha walked by. Glancing at Juliet, Samantha sneered, “Well, Killer, you must be giving the boys everything they want!”

  This idea was so absurd that Juliet almost laughed—until she realized that Samantha actually meant it.

  “What does she think I’m doing?” she asked Elizabeth.

  “What are you doing?” replied Elizabeth.

  Juliet’s heart began to pound. “Do people think I’m, like, kissing the boys or something?”

  Elizabeth shrugged. “All I know is that all the guys want to be near you all of a sudden.”

  Juliet noticed an odd tone in her friend’s voice and suddenly wondered if Elizabeth might be jealous. More than ever she wished she could explain about the amulet. It was sure nothing to be jealous about! Before Juliet could think of what to say, Elizabeth grabbed Juliet’s arm and whispered. “Findley alert! Pete’s heading this way!”

  Juliet’s cheeks flamed red. Pete Findley was an eighth grader who was both smart and handsome, and she had more than once had embarrassing daydreams about him. Her heart began to pound as he came over to lean beside her locker.

  “Hey, Juliet,” he said. “I hear you’re having problems with that little snot, Bambi.”

  Juliet nodded, hardly able to imagine that Pete Findley would know, much less care, about what was going on in sixth grade.

  “You just tell me if she bothers you too much,” said Pete, reaching out to brush back a lock of her hair. Juliet dodged his hand, mentally kicking herself even as she did. Pete looked embarrassed, which made her feel even worse. “Sorry,” he muttered.

  He turned to Elizabeth. “Hey, your brother told me—”

  He stopped in midsentence, then put his hand to his neck.

  “Got him!” crowed Jerome.

  Juliet glanced over at the rat, who was fluttering just above her shoulder. He had his little bow in hand. The string was still quivering and a new arrow appeared even as she watched. She turned back toward Pete. Roxanne was about two feet above his head, strumming her harp. A soft expression came over Pete’s face. “Gosh, Elizabeth,” he said. “I . . . I never noticed how . . . gosh!”

  Then he turned and fled.

  Elizabeth stared after him in wonder. “What was that all about?”

  Juliet shook her head. “Boys,” was all she could say. She turned to glare at Jerome, then realized she would look as if she were staring at nothing. If she started doing that, people would really think she was crazy. But she couldn’t believe he had just made the one boy she did want to notice her fall in love with Elizabeth.

  How unfair could life get?

  “Ain’t love beautiful?” sighed Roxanne.

  Juliet didn’t answer.

  The bell rang. Juliet and Elizabeth headed into their room, where a clump of boys instantly gathered around Juliet’s desk, clamoring for her attention.

  “All right, all right, let’s break this up,” said Ms. Spradling. “We’ve got work to do here.”

  But not much work got done that day, as the room was filled with sighs from the boys and angry glares from the girls. Shortly after lunch Juliet told Ms. Spradling she had a headache—which was not far from the truth—and asked if she could go to the nurse’s office. Then she got the nurse to call her mother to pick her up.

  She figured it was the only way to get home safely.

  Given her preference, Juliet would have spent the entire night in her room. But by the time her mother called them to supper, hunger drove her to rejoin the family. She did manage to talk Roxanne and Jerome into staying upstairs.

  “Sure,” said Jerome. “I could use a nap
, anyway. All that making people fall in love takes it out of a guy”

  Juliet pulled one of her dresser drawers open a few inches. Now that they could not be seen by normal eyes, the rats didn’t need to hide anymore. But the T-shirts piled in the drawer made a nice resting place for them.

  It was a long night at the Dove house, partly because Juliet’s father was in a state of high fuss about the poetry jam, which was scheduled to take place the next day.

  “Calm down, Jack,” said Mrs. Dove, several times. “You’ve never been this nervous before.”

  “I’ve never had the head of the college coming to the festival before!” replied Mr. Dove. “They’re including it in my job evaluation.”

  “You created this event to have fun,” pointed out Mrs. Dove.

  “That was before I knew it could have a significant impact on my career. Drat! There goes the phone again. If it’s another of those boys calling for Juliet, I’ll . . . I’ll . . .”

  He broke off, uncertain of what to say.

  “I’ll get it,” said Margaret

  She picked up the phone, listened for a second, then said, “Sorry, we sent Juliet to live with her aunt Matilda in Tasmania. You’ll have to send her a letter. You can find her address on her Web site: www.love-magnet.com.” Then she slammed down the receiver. “What the heck is going on with these boys?” she demanded, turning to Juliet.

  Unable to explain about the amulet, Juliet just shook her head.

  It wouldn’t have been so bad if they could simply have turned off the phone. But Mr. Dove was expecting important calls from several of the people who were helping him with the poetry jam, so he had to answer the phone every time it rang.

  His exasperation grew as the night went on.

  Finally, Juliet fled to her room. She was hoping for a little calm. But what she found when she went through the door was vastly worse than what she had left behind her.