"We need to do another round on the other floors anyways. Let's go down."
"Sure. The angel shifter should be fine, he's always in the training room till late anyways."
"He works hard, doesn't he?"
"Who knows? I heard something happened in Minato and he's training to get stronger or something."
"Hmm. He looked pretty tired. I'm glad he isn't like his stepsister. I've heard she's ruthless."
"I've heard that too. The number of guards and maids that have left ArchAilennia and pledged elsewhere is ridiculous. Every knight has heard the rumors and have been declining acceptance letters."
"You'd think the King would get some common sense by now?"
"I bet he's lonely ever since the Queen's disappearance. Then his new wife killed herself, right? Now there’s this witch of a woman. He's just not having any luck."
"Let's get going. Don't want the Queen catching us gossiping."
They entered the elevator, the sound of the button binged before the doors slowly began to close. I sighed in relief, curious about their not so private discussion.
ArchAilennia. Daniel's home. Hmmm.
I decided to think about it later, returning to my quest as I focused on the wind's call. Eventually, I reached an empty room— a balcony greeting me. This where the wind brought me. Thank you.
I wheeled myself in, looking around to see if anyone was lurking around, but the room was truly empty. There wasn't any furniture in this room, just a plain empty space which led to the stone balcony.
I made my way onto the enclosed platform, immediately sighing in relief at the warm breeze that passed. It was as if the wind was greeting me, rewarding my effort to listen to its call. I noticed the small twinkle of stars, wondering if I could get a better view. I stared at my legs, frowning at the reality I couldn't stand on my own.
Maybe if I try like back then...
At the facility, a method was developed for us to walk by infusing our magic into our legs. The effect would allow us to walk normally as long as we were able to maintain the magic requirement. But it had been a few cycles since we'd needed to use it and we'd completely stopped when we were cleared by the Owner. I glanced back at the ledge before lifting my head to the sky, the urge even stronger than before.
I parked my wheelchair to one side, taking a deep breath before closing my eyes and concentrating all my magic to my legs.
It took a while, not having channeled our magic since Makoto had shown Marcus during our Earthala trip.
I allowed the energy to flow down to my feet first and begin a slow progression up my legs. By the time I opened my eyes, I was out of breath, panting as my shoulders moved up and down.
I bit my lip, still determined to try and walk. I couldn't exhaust myself, but if I could take at least three steps I'd be okay. I knew once I reached that ledge I'd have to hold on for dear life and maybe I'd get a view of the stars that tempted me.
"Just three steps," I whispered to myself.
I felt a flicker of fear go through me, something I hadn't experienced since the exam— only seconds before sensing a presence behind us and being stabbed by Jeffrey.
Maybe it was due to the fact I had no one else in my mind— no one to encourage me or calm my nerves. In the past, Rose always seemed to know when I needed her, waking up and guiding me many times. But now, they were all resting and I was truly alone.
I swallowed the lump in my throat, taking another breath before I worked on lifting my right leg.
It took a few tries and an extra dose of magic before my leg did what it was supposed to, lifting up and touching the ground. I almost cried at the sensation of the ground— my bare feet touching the cool surface. It was as if I'd never lost the ability to walk. I lifted my left leg, pushing the pedal aside to give me space to stand, trembling as multiple emotions ran through me.
I prepared myself to stand, readying my hands on the sides of the wheelchair as I leaned forward. I pushed off, standing up.
My legs shook but I kept my balance. I quickly glanced at the ledge, shifting my gait before lifting my right leg.
"One." I lifted my left leg forward to take another step.
"Two."
I was already out of breath as my magic began to flee me. I lifted my right leg again, reaching the ledge before my markings dimmed, the feeling vanishing in a flash.
I gripped the ledge, using my upper strength to stop my body from falling to its demise. I let out a breath of relief before I lifted myself up, trying again to focus on allowing more magic to flow down to my legs.
After a few attempts, I groaned, feeling weak already. I glanced back up to the sky, hoping the stars would give me new found energy, but I frowned, still not able to fully see the countless stars I knew sparkled in the cloudless sky.
"My effort was a waste," I whispered, feeling the wave of depression hit me.
Before I could sulk at the irony of my effort, something embraced me from behind. Huh?
I was ready to react, but a wave of lavender hit my senses, which helped me realize who held me in their arms.
"Daniel?" I questioned, I shifted my head slightly. My eyes grew wide as I watched tears begin to run down his cheeks, his chin resting on my right shoulder.
"Don't leave. Don't...I'm sorry. Don't die. Please," he begged.
I didn't understand what he meant, but from the way his body trembled against me. I didn't think it was the best time to ask questions. I have to reassure him. Yes.
"Daniel...I'm safe. Don't cry."
I could feel his fear, my sensitive ears picking up his frantic heart that beat wildly as he continued to tremble.
"Midnight..." he whispered, tightening his hold around me.
I tensed up, not knowing how to react. But I knew he wouldn't hurt me and he didn’t seem upset with me for sneaking out. I let the tension leave me, relaxing in his embrace. I lifted my hands to return the hold, rubbing his back soothingly. My magic had long gone, but Daniel held my weight.
"Why are you crying, Daniel?" I questioned.
I wanted to know what could have possibly made him so afraid? I wasn't going to die. Why did he think I would die?
"I thought...I'd made you jump...like Claire," he whispered.
"Claire?" I asked, even more confused.
He nodded against my shoulder.
I didn't know what to say, but I wanted him to calm down, so I continued rubbing his back. After he began to calm down I spoke.
"I wanted fresh air, but no one was around. Found this place and got distracted. Sorry for scaring you. Wasn't planning to jump. Don't cry," I reassured him.
He needed to understand he had not done any harm. Maybe that would calm his rapidly beating heart. He nodded, my words hopefully beginning to sink in.
He took a deep breath before he leaned back to stare at me, those gold eyes were still red. I was curious, multiple questions flowing into my mind but I ignored them, wanting to wait till Daniel brought them up.
"Sorry, I interrupted your stargazing," he apologized, giving me a sad smile before he glanced away.
"No worry. Stargazing is not fun by yourself," I admitted. I didn't want to tell him the fact I couldn't see anything and was currently depressed about it.
He frowned. "Did you still want to?" he asked.
I needed a moment to think, wondering if it was okay for him to keep me company. The thought of him using his power flickered in my mind, but I ignored it— my lonely heart ached for some company.
"Yes," I confirmed, meeting his gaze.
"Okay," he replied.
I didn't expect him to lift me up, but his arms hooked under my arms and legs, picking me up like I weighed nothing and eased me into my pink wheelchair.
"Can I take you to a better spot?" he requested.
I lifted my head to stare up at him, noticing his quick gaze at the sky before he lowered his head to meet my eyes. "Sure."
He took me through the castle until we were heading toward a ga
rden maze. I stared at the tall walls, vines intertwining with one another with some in full bloom— different types of flowers swaying in the gentle breeze that greeted us.
We reached a clearing, a stone bench coming to view. Daniel positioned me next to the bench. I looked at the smooth, dark grey stone, wondering how it would feel if my hand laid upon it. I figured Daniel would sit at the edge of the bench next to my wheelchair, but he did something unexpected— lifting me up and lowering me to sit on the bench.
"Thank you," I whispered.
He nodded, sitting next to me.
I was glad he didn't move away from me, his hand rested next to mine as we sat in silence. I craved his warmth and presence, anything to avoid the loneliness I had felt earlier.
I turned my attention to the vast starry sky, my eyes widened in awe at the sight above me. The many colored stars, the smell of roses and other scents mixed with Daniel's lavender aroma, coupled with the warm breeze that continued to waft by left me speechless.
So many emotions were running through me, but it was thanks to Daniel I got to experience this— enjoying Mother Nature's gift to us was something I'd been unable to appreciate until now.
I smiled as I blinked, a tear rolled down my cheek.
"Midnight?" Daniel whispered.
"So beautiful. This world is so beautiful and filled with so many undiscovered mysteries," I acknowledged. I blinked, more tears falling before I continued, wanting him to understand why I was so emotional.
"At the facility, the sky is nothing but darkness. Pitch black with no stars or light. Makoto would pray every day imagining multi-colored stars and pray the gods would help us to find our purpose. Who would have thought all of this existed? You never really appreciate something until you've experienced it being taken away from you."
I lowered my head to stare into his gold eyes.
"I wasn't going to jump. I'm not going to give up for Mako's sake. Makoto loves this world...loves that she's able to see life in a new perspective. She'd wish to enjoy freedom and see what was behind those mold-filled walls. Now that we can finally enjoy Mother Starlight's beauty, it's hard to ignore the feelings of happiness. I'm just sad Makoto isn't here right now to see it. But, I'll work hard. I'll work ten times harder so when she comes back she won't be sad anymore," I declared.
I watched him take a deep breath, conviction oozed into his facial expression before I felt something warm land on top of my hand. I glanced down to see his hand on mine. I didn't want to pull away, enjoying his demonstration of comforting me.
"I'll work just as hard to help you heal. I'll read every book and search far and wide to find what I need to help restore your legs. I swear it. Let the Starlight gods be my witness," he vowed.
I knew he meant every word, feeling a hint of magic and increased warmth from his hand. A part of me wanted to look down to view his hand, but I couldn't pull my eyes away from his intense gaze. He deserved my full attention and acknowledgment.
I nodded. "Okay," I whispered.
His hand gripped mine, holding it firmly as he placed it on his left leg, returning his gaze to the stars. I gave a small smile before I too went back to stargazing.
We sat in silence; both of us lost in our own thoughts, but it wasn't an uncomfortable silence. Time passed, the stars beginning to dim little by little.
I didn't know how long we'd spent sitting there, but I enjoyed the peace and quiet. Eventually, the thought of the guard's discussion came to my mind, followed by Daniel's mention of someone named Claire.
"Daniel."
"Yes, Midnight?"
"Can I ask something? You're not required to answer." I didn't want to force him to share. I already knew he had issues with talking about his past and didn't want him feeling like I deserved an answer after everything that had occurred during the exam.
"Claire?"
I nodded, noticing the glint of sadness flashing in his eyes.
"When I was six...I did something bad. I guess at the time, I'd assumed it was my fault. Actually, I still feel it's my fault. My real mother had disappeared a few weeks after my birth. Many people thought it was because I was an Archangel and she didn't want to do deal with a shifter whose gift was the ability to manipulate others. My father struggled with her disappearance, the realization she could have been kidnapped by rogues was a possibility since King Akiyama had used his foresight and came up blank with the Princess. Eventually, Father remarried my stepmother, Claire. She was nice in the beginning, but as cycles went on...she changed," he began.
I squeezed his hand, hoping I could be of assistance in comforting him. He gave me a half smile, looking back up to the sky that already began to change color— the sunrise approaching.
"My older brother Michael, he was dealing with some issues and struggled with not knowing if he liked girls. As angel spirits, especially being royal children and our spiritual background, him being bisexual would have been frowned upon or could have even caused a revolt. Claire began beating him as a way of releasing her stress and pain of having to be stuck being our mother. She always did it when my father was away and it only got worse and increased in frequency when he went on longer business trips. I hated watching Michael in pain and hadn't realized I was using my gift. I was just always reminded that my gift was bad and I couldn't think badly of others, which included my stepmother's erratic behavior."
"What happened?" I whispered; a hint of anger leaked off my voice which seemed to surprise Daniel from the way his eyes widened.
He continued, "She got mad at Michael yet again, and I was just tired of it. I noticed the change in Michael, the way he began to distance himself from everyone. I hated being alone and Michael didn't want anyone near him. When Michael left the room, Claire noticed the pocket watch our biological mom had left us when we were kids. Each royal family has some type of heirloom that is given to them when they're young," he explained.
He slipped his free hand into his pocket to retrieve a gold watch. I couldn't see all the detailing due to the lack of light, but when he opened it, the clock glowed a light yellow and the numbers glowed a soft white against the black background. I watched it tick, seeing it was four in the morning.
"When I saw the way she looked at it, I knew her intentions. She wanted to destroy it as punishment and I knew that would break Michael's heart. I retrieved the watch before she could take it. She requested it from me and I refused. I told her I hated her and wished she would disappear. That was the first time she hit me...and the last," he whispered the last sentence, swallowing before he continued.
"She was fed up and insulted my birth mother and called us pathetic. I didn't understand back then that she'd never really considered us as her children, so I didn't understand why she wanted to leave. I tried to stop her, but she told me not to touch her and she wished for me to die."
I frowned, anger boiling within me. In our galaxy, having children was a blessing and a gift from the gods. Earthala was the only realm that could have children solely by having sex. The rest followed the Starlight laws which dictated if you wanted children, you had to pray to the gods and they would determine if you were ready.
But in situations like these, she sounded like she entered the relationship for personal benefit and felt like Michael and Daniel were burdens and shouldn't have been her responsibility as the King's wife.
He continued, "I hadn't known she'd actually wanted me to die and was using magic at that moment. My gift is affected by my emotions and at that moment I was heartbroken. I hated how she said so many mean things when Father wasn't around and all I wanted was my brother. I told her she should disappear and go away. My magic must have been stronger than hers and overpowered her spell. She...didn't say a word and turned around, staggering to the balcony. I didn't know how to stop her and so I called for Michael. I hadn't realized Father was home and they both rushed in to see what was going on. Before Michael could ask me what was going on, Father called out to Claire, but it was too late. We turned
our heads to see her body lean over the edge and fall to her death," Daniel concluded.
We sat in silence while he closed his pocket watch, putting it back in his pocket before looking up at the stars.
"How did you know she used magic?" I inquired.
"One of our maids, Marissa, always stayed hidden when Claire got bad. She'd figured out that Claire was beating Michael from the change in his behavior and the bruises on his body which he played off as injuries from training. She had a soft spot for me and had later told my father she was afraid Claire would hurt me, which would do more harm because of the way my gift worked. She's the one who noticed Claire’s casting of magic."
I nodded, taking a moment to reanalyze the situation before I spoke.
"You know it's not your fault," I whispered.
He didn't reply.
I wiggled my hand in his, watching him free mine. Before he could pull away, I slipped my hand back into his— palm pressing against his as my fingers enclosed his hand. He looked confused.
“Do you hold yourself responsible for Mako being in this position?” I questioned.
He glanced away.
I waited, keeping my intense gaze on him till he slowly nodded.
"Yes."
"Why?"
"Because I pushed both of you away. I didn't think of my role as a knight first and look where it got you. If...if I had been honest with myself and stopped running away, none of this would have happened," he revealed.
"You don't know that."
"What?"
"You can't judge yourself and automatically assume that because of XYZ, we’re in this predicament. Kai said the future had looked perfect, didn't he? Nobody seems to understand how Jeffrey slipped through the exam with ease and we’ll never know until we catch him. Why blame yourself for something out of your control?"
I could see a flicker of understanding flash on his facial expression, but before he could open his mouth to argue, I continued.
"Claire wanted you to die. She cast a spell so you would die. You countering that spell is self-defense. Your body knew if you didn't react, you wouldn't survive. Then what would have happened? You were in a kill or be killed situation, and you never had intentions of actually killing her. It was a defensive response and if you ask me, she got what she deserved or the gods wouldn't have allowed it."
Poisonous Dream (The Starlight Gods Series Book 5) Page 10
