by Lisa Shelby
The final gift is a framed picture of myself and Ireland at the zoo. It was from the moment where we took a break and sat in the grass to watch the hawk demonstration on the main stage. Ireland is in my lap, and she’s kissing my cheek. The smile on my face has to be one of the biggest I have ever smiled, and I am so thankful that he captured the moment. He isn’t in the picture, but part of the reason I was so happy that day was because he was with us. Even though it’s only the two of us in this picture, I can’t help but think of him when I look at it. This was the day my world starting coming together and I started to love and live again. This picture makes me realize how thankful I am to have him in my life. How did I get so lucky?
Chapter 42
Jonathan
With our album playing through my ear buds, I’m running for my life on this damn treadmill. My eyes are burning as the sweat pours off of my head and down my face. I look down and see I’ve already run seven miles on today’s penance run. I’m sure I am pushing harder than the doctors would like, but I don’t even realize how long I’ve been at it. My mind is going a million miles an hour as I think about everything that Emily and I talked about last night. I’m still in shock at the way things went and the unwavering support she gave me even after my bullshit behavior.
Promising to never walk away from her again was the easiest promise I’ve ever made to another person or myself. My time apart from her was a misery I don’t ever want to experience again. I should have let her in. I didn’t, yet she still never quit on me. She texted and called every day…she left fishies on my front porch…she never gave up on me. I will spend the rest of my life doing the same for her, and proving to her that her trust and support was worth it.
I’ve known for a long time that I needed to talk to somebody about all the nightmares that still tend take over from time to time since losing Shell and Mom. I was in such a dark place. My nightmares didn’t only come while I slept, they were always on my mind. Finding Emily again gave me such light that I was foolish enough to think that she was the salve to all my problems; that life would be perfect just because she was in it. It’s true that it’s pretty damn close to perfect. But I still have shit to work through, and if it means going to a shrink so that life with Emily and Ireland can be that much better, then that’s what I’ll do. I could tell when I offered to go talk to somebody that she was relieved that she didn’t have to ask me to go herself. I think it’s been clear to everybody but me that I needed some help.
First thing this morning, I called Noah Caldwell to get the name of his shrink. I know it’s helped him deal with his shooting from last year. I already have an appointment for tomorrow morning. I haven’t been medically cleared to go back to work yet, and I really shouldn’t have anything to do with Emily’s case, but I can’t not try to help figure this shit out. No more sitting on my ass. Getting to the gym today was step two in getting my shit back together. I got my girl back, and now I need to make sure I keep her.
Offering to talk to somebody was hard, but not as hard as agreeing to slowing things down and not having ‘sleep overs’. I get it, I really do, but now that I have her in my life I hate to be away from her for even five minutes. I miss her when she’s only in the next room so agreeing to not spend my nights with her was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done.
I get that she lives with her brother and she’s trying to be respectful. I really do get it. It sucks, but I get it. Right now she’s at her mom’s and she wants to be respectful to her as well. I know she doesn’t want to confuse Ireland, but what is there to confuse her about? I love her momma, and I’m not going anywhere, so she might as well get used to me being around. We will have to have a sleep over at my place soon or I may go bat-shit crazy. It’s not about the sex, I just sleep so much better with her there. I didn’t have a nightmare at all the week Mick was gone. I can’t say the same since the night of the wedding.
Between the sound of Kings of Leon in my ears, the pounding of my feet on the treadmill and my mind that won’t shut off, I almost don’t notice the sound of the call coming in. I look down and see that it’s from an unknown number. I almost don’t answer, but my gut tells me I should.
“Hello?”
“Officer Kelly?” says the scared voice on the other end of the line.
I instantly hit the STOP button on the treadmill, and hop off the machine and make my way to the front doors of the building. I have no idea who this is, or what they are going to say, but I know it’s about my girls. I just know it is.
“Yes, this is Officer Kelly, who’s this?”
“Uh sir, this is Jesse Miller. You came by my house a few weeks back. You said you were friends with Miss Jacobs?”
My heart drops to my stomach because I know this is the call we’ve been waiting for. I can’t let him know how important it is to me so I try my best to play it cool.
“Hi Jesse, how’s it going?” I try to ask casually and not like my sanity hangs on his every word.
“Uh…Officer Kelly?”
“I’m right here, Jesse, and please call me Jonathan.”
“Oh okay.”
“You okay, Jesse? Is everything okay with you and your brother? Miss Jacobs was real excited to see you in class yesterday. Glad you made it back to school, Jesse. That’s really great news.”
“Yeah, it’s great to be back, sir. Things are fine for me and my brother. I…uh…I called to talk about Miss Jacobs.”
I think my heart might actually burst through my rib cage any second as I wait to hear what he has to say. I want to pull the information out of this kid’s head, but I know I need to let him go at his pace.
“Okay, what’s up?”
“Well, I heard that she’s been getting some threats and that maybe somebody might have broken into her house?”
“Who told you that, Jesse?”
“Well, the person who says they’ve been doing it. Is it true?”
“It is, Jesse.”
“Shit.”
“Jesse, please tell me who’s doing this to her,” I plead to him as calmly as I can.
“I was really hoping it wasn’t true. Poor Miss Jacobs.”
“Jesse…”
“Sir…it’s my cousin…Kayla…Kayla Simmons.”
“Why would she want to do this to Miss Jacobs?”
“I can’t believe she would do this, but she told me all about it. After Miss Jacobs helped me, her boyfriend, Austin, wouldn’t stop talking about her. He had always talked about her, but after what she did for me apparently he kinda went off about how awesome she was. I think she’s jealous of her, sir.”
“Did she tell you anything else?”
“She just told me how she and Austin happened to be at the zoo when Miss Jacobs was there with her daughter. She thought it was funny to try and scare her with the picture. I guess Austin didn’t see them and had no idea she had gotten the picture when he went to get food. She said she left notes at first, but then when Miss Jacobs gave Austin her number, that was when it wasn’t funny anymore and she was pissed. She thinks that she and Austin are going to get married. If they break up, her chances at a happy life end and it will be all Miss Jacobs fault. I know Miss Jacobs only gave her number to Austin because she was worried about him. It’s not like that, Officer…I mean, Jonathan.”
“I know it’s not, Jesse. Thank you so much for calling. I know it has to be hard to call when Kayla is family.”
“Miss Jacobs is awesome and when Kayla told me what she did to her little girl’s room, I knew I had to tell somebody. I am so sorry. I didn’t know until last night. If I had known sooner I would have called, I swear.”
“Don’t worry about it, Jesse. You called and you have no idea how much we appreciate it. Do you mind sharing what you told me with other officers if we need you to?”
“Not at all, sir.”
“Are you at school today?”
“Yes.”
“Is Kayla at school today?”
“Yes, sir.
”
“Okay, thank you, Jesse. Now get back to class and don’t say anything to anybody about any of this. Can you do that for me?”
“No problem. I haven’t told anybody. Austin is gonna freak out. He has no idea and he’s gonna feel so bad that any of this could have had to do with him. I’m so sorry for Miss Jacobs. Please tell her that for me?”
“I will, Jesse. Thanks for calling and I’ll be in touch.”
I’m not sure how I got here, but when I hang up I find myself pacing in the middle of The Gym parking lot. I’m still sweating and I’m filled with so much relief, anger and anxiety that I don’t even know what to do with myself. I know I need to start making calls, but my brain and my body are trying to calm itself and process the information I was just given.
I bend over with my hands on my knees and breathe. I give myself that two or three seconds and then run to my truck. I hop in and call Blackburn who should be sitting outside Emily’s classroom right now. I tell him what’s going on, and to just sit tight and not to let Emily know anything is up yet. I am ten minutes away and I need to be the person that tells her.
Next I call Mick.
“What’s up, Kelly?”
“Mick, we got her.”
“What do you mean her?”
“Kayla Simmons. She’s a student at the school and dates one of Emily’s SPED students. It’s all about jealousy, Mick. The kid she dates, Austin, has no idea. Her cousin is Jesse Miller. He called and told me.” I know I’m rambling. I hope I’m making sense.
“This is all over something as stupid as a student being jealous over a teacher? What the fuck is wrong with kids these days?”
“I don’t know, Mick, it’s complete bullshit but at least we have an answer. I already called Blackburn at the school and he’s notifying the principal. I’m on my way over there right now.”
“Thanks, Kelly. I’ll notify Detectives and we’ll get somebody over to the school ASAP. I’ll see you there.”
I drop my phone in my cup holder and thank God that Mick is cool about me and Emily. It sure is making all of this so much easier. I’m a sweaty mess, but I don’t even care right now. I just want to get to her and tell her that the nightmare is hopefully over. I know it will be hard for her to hear it’s a student, but hopefully there will be some relief as well and life can start to go back to normal.
My adrenaline hasn’t calmed during the drive to the school. I grab the towel in my gym bag and try to wipe off some of the sweat, but in reality I am taking this time to collect myself before I talk to her. I need to be her strength; somebody she can lean on. I can’t go in there all amped up. I need to be calm for her. I really just want to run through the front doors and into her classroom, but I know that I need to wait until her current class is over.
I make my way to her room and Blackburn is there. He quietly fills me in and tells me that Sgt. Callahan is on his way along with Detectives. Sgt. Callahan has been a friend of Emily’s dad since they started on the force, and I’m sure that he’s been keeping her dad up to date with what’s happening. I just hope her dad doesn’t show up. Emily isn’t ready to see him right now if all the ignored text messages are any indication. I’m afraid that if he showed up today it might be too much for her.
There’s still twenty minutes left in Emily’s class, and she has no idea I’m here. I wait with Blackburn in the hall where she can’t see us. By the time the bell rings, Mick, Sgt. Callahan, and Detective’s Fred Wills and Matt Gilbert have arrived and are in the office with the principal. I’m glad they’re in the office and not all standing here when the bell rings. I think that would overwhelm her.
The bell rings and I step aside to wait for the kids to file out. Once I see it’s just Emily and Mrs. Colyer, I step inside the room. Her face lights up the moment she sees me, but falls just as soon as she registers the serious look on my face. It’s obvious by my appearance that I came here in a rush.
“What’s wrong, Jonathan? Is Ireland okay?”
“She’s fine. Everything is fine, baby,” I say as I take her hand.
“Why are you here then?”
“We know who it is, Em.”
“Who?” Emily and Mrs. Colyer both ask at the same time.
I look over my shoulder to make sure that there aren’t any kids in the room, and fill them both in on my call from Jesse earlier. Emily has tears streaming down her face, but she isn’t making a sound. Mrs. Colyer hands her some tissues and tells her to take the rest of the day and as long as she needs. As kids start to gather, she pulls herself together, and by the time Jesse enters the room you wouldn’t even know that there is anything wrong. It saddens me to think that this comes from years of practice.
Chapter 43
Emily
I have so many questions running through my head, but with the students quickly filling up the room, I know that now isn’t the time. I also have so many feelings reeling through me that it’s hard to keep myself in check in front of the students. I feel relief in knowing who it is, and that hopefully the madness is about to end, but I also feel bad for Austin and Jesse. Jesse had to rat out his own cousin, and I know that Austin is going to feel awful about this.
I can’t help but feel that some of this is my fault. Did I cross a line with Austin? I don’t think that I did, and I don’t think he had feelings for me other than maybe a little hero worship, but now I’m so worried that I crossed a line without knowing it. I will have to talk to him about that, but now is not that time.
“Hey Miss J. Who’s this?”
“Hi Austin. This is my boyfriend, Jonathan.”
“Oh, hey.”
Jonathan reaches out his hand. “Nice to meet you Austin. I’ve heard a lot of great things about you.”
“Ah, really? Thanks, Miss J.” he says as he extends his hand to Jonathan but sends a big smile full of pride in my direction.
“Of course, you’re a great kid and you know that. Where’s Jesse? Did he not come back today?”
“He’s here, but not sure where he is right now. He must be running late.”
As if on cue, Jesse enters the room. As soon as he sees Jonathan in the room he nearly comes to a complete halt, but then catches himself and continues across the room to where he usually sits with Austin.
“Hi, Miss J.”
“Hey there, Jess. I know that I already told you this but it’s really great to see you back at school.”
“Thanks,” he mumbles while looking down at the ground.
Austin gets distracted by a friend and steps away. I take this moment to say a few words to Jesse.
Quietly, so only Jesse can hear I say, “Jesse, thank you so much for what you’ve done. I know it must have been hard. I hope you know how much I appreciate you risking trouble with your family for my daughter and I.”
His face turns bright red with embarrassment. He gives me a slight nod and then sits down in his chair. This is my sign that he’s heard me, but would like the conversation to be over. I respect his wishes and step away.
“Mrs. Colyer, if you don’t mind, I think I will take you up on your offer and leave for the day.”
“Of course. You two get out of here.”
I grab my purse, my jacket and Jonathan’s hand and we walk out of the classroom. The moment we exit the room, we take a couple of steps into the hallway and Jonathan squeezes my hand and pulls me to a stop.
He bends his knees to lower himself to my eye level and asks, “Baby, you okay?”
I let out a heavy sigh and look into the most beautiful pair of eyes I have ever seen. “I’m okay, just glad that this whole mess will hopefully be over soon. Besides, I have you to hold on to so I know that everything will be okay in the end.”
Jonathan leans forward, and whispers in my ear. “Damn straight, baby. There’s no getting rid of me. I’m here for the long haul so I’m glad you’re good with it. Now, let’s get out of here.”
As we walk towards the front doors, we pass a set of parents that do
n’t look too happy to be paying the school a visit. I can’t help but follow them over my shoulder to see them enter the office and be greeted by Sgt. Callahan.
Jonathan leans towards me and says, “Kayla’s parents you think?”
“Must be.”
We cross the lot to Jonathan’s truck and he helps me up and into the cab. He takes my hand, kisses the back of it and says, “Don’t go anywhere. I’ll be right back.”
Thinking he’s running back into the school, I’m surprised when he runs around the front of the truck and then jumps into the driver’s side of the cab. “I’m back!” He looks like a kid on Christmas morning and those dimples are on full display. There’s a twinkle in his eye as he leans over the console and I know what he’s going to say before he gets the words out. I don’t stop him because to be honest, I love it every time he does it. “Gracie, I’m going to kiss you now.”
And to say he kisses me is an understatement. As always, that connection that we have shoots through me and he fills me with warmth. That warmth that always comforts me all the way down to my toes. His lips tell me exactly what he wants me to know, and I can feel his love and want with every touch.
He releases my lips, leans his forehead against mine and says, “Let’s go for a little field trip. What do you say? Ireland is with your mom, so let’s go for a drive.”
“Sure. If it will make you happy, and I get some alone time with you, then a drive it is.”
We end up at the Rose Gardens and have a perfect view of Portland with Mt. Hood off in the distance. Even though it’s a cold and rainy day and the mountain isn’t completely visible, it’s still beautiful.
