He looked down at his hands then back up to meet her probing gaze. «I did not tell you right away because I wanted to give us a chance to come together as lifemates. You need to trust someone and I wanted it to be me.»
She was silent a moment, her blue eyes on his face. A small sigh escaped. «You really do like control, don't you?»
He shrugged his broad shoulders. «Yes.»
«Don't do that again. Don't hold back information from me because of something that stupid. Do you really think I would trust my father's twin sister so easily after seeing what my great-grandfather and my father were capable of doing?»
«I do not know her, but I have heard she is a great warrior. She fights the vampire beside her lifemate.»
Lara pushed a hand through her hair. «Are you certain she's Razvan's sister?»
«There is no doubt. I can take you to her. She's a good person, Lara. And your father, whatever he is now, appears to have been misjudged. He appears to have been a good man at one time. Natalya, that's her name, can tell you much more about him.»
She looked up at him and Nicolas felt a strange melting in the vicinity of his heart. She looked pale and vulnerable, her eyes enormous. There were shadows there, and dark circles beneath her eyes. He wrapped his arm around her and drew her against his body, holding her close to comfort her. It amazed him how right she felt in his arms.
Nuzzling the top of her head with his chin, he rocked her gently. «If it is too soon for you, Lara, we can wait before you talk to her.»
She didn't exactly melt into him, but she did put her arms around his waist and hold on. «I don't know what I want to do.»
«She's been in the cave.»
Lara stepped back, looking up at him. «When? Recently?»
Nicolas nodded. «I do not know too much other than what my brothers told me. Manolito, my brother,
fought beside her during a recent battle.» He took a breath. «It was thought she killed Razvan with her sword, but he turned up again, or at least he appeared to, possessing a woman's body and striking the blow that sent Manolito to the shadow world.»
Lara turned away from him to hide her expression from his watchful eyes. Of course she had to go see her father's twin sister. But she didn't know if she was strong enough to learn about her father. It was much easier to think of him as a monster than a man tortured beyond all endurance. She couldn't imagine the psychological torment of knowing one's body was used to harm others. That would be worse than physical torture.
«And if it's true,» she murmured aloud, «I just left him there.» She raised a stricken gaze to Nicolas. «That's why he helped bury my memories of him, isn't it? And the aunts agreed to it because they didn't want me to know I was abandoning a father who had tried to protect me. I would never have gone had I known he was a prisoner, being tortured and abused.»
She rubbed her wrist. Nicolas had managed to reduce the scarring, but some of the ridges were still there. She brushed her thumb back and forth in a soothing gesture, without realizing she was doing it until she noticed Nicolas's gaze drop to her wrist. Embarrassed, she put her arm behind her back.
«Does it hurt?»
The gentleness in his voice constricted her throat. She shook her head. «I think it's a habit.» But it had hurt for years, burning at times, painful for no reason.
«You didn't abandon him, Lara. You were a child, eight years old. Consider it from his point of view. If he was innocent and trying to protect you, the relief he would feel, the freedom from allowing Xavier to use him against you, would have been tremendous for him. Had you stayed, his suffering would have been far more.»
«You don't know that.»
A small smile softened the edge of his mouth. «He is Dragonseeker. His every instinct is to protect his family, especially his women and children. If Xavier really possessed his body, using him to impregnate women, if he really murdered your mother in front of him as it appeared he did, and if he controlled Razvan, forcing him to take your blood, then Razvan has suffered the torment of the damned for centuries. That would be the worst a Carpathian male could suffer. Your father would have rejoiced to have you out of there and out of Xavier's control.»
She pressed her lips together. His hunger was beating at her, yet he stood there patiently trying to reassure her that leaving her father to be tortured and maybe murdered had been a good thing. «Let's go, Nicolas. I'd like to meet my aunt.»
«Do you want to try shifting? An owl, perhaps?»
Her jeweled eyes gleamed at him. He had said she was capable of shifting with his help and she wanted it to be true. She was certainly willing to try. «A dragon.»
He nodded. «Of course, what else would you choose?» He grinned at her, a teasing invitation to fun. She'd never seen him smile like that, and it made him look younger. «You are already familiar with the dragon's body. The most important thing with shifting-« He held out his hand to her and began to walk with her through the cavern into the labyrinth of tunnels. Candles sprang to life on the walls ahead of them
as they hurried along. «-is to remember to keep the image in your head at all times. It has to become automatic so that you do it without really thinking about it and that takes practice. I want you to keep your mind merged fully with mine. Once you shift, excitement and joy-I cannot even begin to describe the feeling for you-sets in and it is easy to lose what you are doing. So keep your mind firmly in mine so I can help you if you need it.»
She smiled up at him. «Don't worry, I don't exactly want to fall out of the sky.»
He laughed softly, shocking himself. He wasn't a man who laughed often-if ever. He was slowly discovering that with her companionship, Lara also brought a joy in the sharing of everyday things. He tightened his fingers around hers, keeping her close to his side as they moved swiftly through the tunnel. «I did not notice that you scanned the area periodically for vampires. It is very necessary for survival to make that a habit.»
«Isn't that a rather faulty system now?»
His eyebrow shot up. «You have been absorbing the information in my mind.» He was pleased with her. With everything going on, it hadn't occurred to him that while merged with him she would be seeking as much information as possible to help with her own survival.
«Of course. You seem to have a lot of experience hunting vampires.»
His boyhood story intrigued her and Lara had tried to delve a little deeper, at first to see if Nicolas always embraced the fight with the undead. Did he get a rush when he fought? When he killed? She had found the answer and it worried her, but it also fascinated her that he felt no fear-none-when he fought. She had spent her life afraid, always looking over her shoulder, terrified that others would discover her differences and condemn her, terrified that Xavier would find her again. She wanted to be like Nicolas, facing the worst without fear.
«Not all Carpathian males were raised to be hunters. In the old days we had a community and many men were craftsmen. They did woodworking and gem-calling. They worked with herbs and candles to develop our healing powers. Some were sword-makers. They did incredible, beautiful work with weapons. My family was bred as warriors. Much of the skills of our ancestors are imprinted on us. So if you are born into a lineage of warriors, you have skills and reflexes already built in. In other words, you already have an advantage before you even begin training. Where a gem-caller or sword-maker has other skills imprinted, those skills are not at all useful for fighting.»
There was a small trail of water running across the path. Without missing a stride, Nicolas caught Lara around the waist, lifted her over it and continued walking as though nothing had interrupted them.
When the small, secret thrill at the strength in his arms subsided Lara slipped her hand back into his. «And the darkness in you? How exactly does that come to be?»
His fingers tightened around hers. «Does it frighten you?»
Her gaze flicked to his face and then sought out boulders blocking the entrance to the tunnel. Excitement was bu
ilding at the prospect of shapeshifting. «A little,» she admitted.
He lifted an eyebrow.
Lara shrugged. «Well, maybe a lot. You're very sure of yourself.»
«I have lived a long time.» He brought her fingers to his lips. «But all this is new to me and I have found that I am learning as we go. Feel free to clue me in when I am making mistakes.»
«Have no worries there,» Lara said. She tugged at his hand, halting him before he could avoid her question by bringing down the safeguards. «I really want to understand you better and I can't if I'm worried all the time that you might become a vampire.»
«That is no longer a possibility, Lara,» he assured. «You are the other half of my soul, the light to my darkness. Once found, your light guides and protects me. I have no doubt I will always be a difficult man, but I will not turn vampire.» He jerked his chin toward the boulders, his eyebrow raised in challenge. «Do you think you can remove the safeguards?»
A smile slowly formed. «A test. You're challenging me.»
«I am also timing you.»
It was her turn to raise an eyebrow. She spun around toward the entrance and lifted her hands into the air. Every stroke of the pattern he had woven was recorded in her mind. The aunts had drilled it into her to observe even the tiniest movement, a flick of a finger, a small nuance that made the difference of getting it right the first time and surviving.
She could feel his eyes on her and the intensity of his gaze sent a shiver of awareness tingling down her spine. She had to really concentrate to block him out, to make the long graceful movements and the short, subtle ones accompany her soft murmured words. It was a silly chant really, one she had made up and used repeatedly as a child to help her learn how to weave and undo warding spells. Her hands moved swiftly, gracefully, following each thread of unseen light, seeking out each knot and double checking the threads in the weave of the pattern.
Spider, spider spin your web, absorbing now these unseen threads. Spider, spider, throw your line, remove all that would harm or bind. Spider, spider, clear the way, protecting now this entryway.
The boulders rocked back and forth for a moment, shimmered and disappeared. Lara spun around, grinning at him. He was there-too close-right on her in fact. She hadn't heard or felt him move, but as she turned, she turned right into his arms, her face raised toward his. Their gazes locked. A frisson of awareness-of arousal-raced from breasts to thighs.
His finger curled around the nape of her neck, his thumb sliding over her cheek as he bent his head toward hers. His other hand slid down to the small of her back, urging her body close against him. Lara didn't pull away but neither did she lean into him, nervous and unsure of herself and him.
Do not be afraid of this, Lara. It is just a kiss. I am asking only that in this you do not fear me. His thumb feathered across her cheek, his black gaze holding hers.I do not want you to ever fear I will take anything from you that you are not willing to give .
His words played over her skin, floated on his warm breath. She could see the length of his lashes, the cut of his sensual mouth. He gave her time to pull back, lowering his head slowly, inch by inch, until his lips feathered over hers, back and forth, soft as velvet. Air backed up in her lungs and her heart beat too loud.
I'm not a coward. She whispered the words in his mind and moved into him, adjusting her body fully
into his.
No, you are not.
He pressed a kiss to the corner of her mouth, teeth tugged on her full lower lip until she wanted to groan with pleasure. He flicked his tongue against her lips, and then licked, as if savoring her taste. His hand put even more pressure on her back, and her body went soft and pliant, molding to his until she felt they shared the same skin. His mind opened to hers, his emotions pouring in.
She was instantly drenched in a flood of desire. Hot. Passionate. Yet at the same time, there was a tenderness so intimate tears flooded her eyes. She could feel his elation that she met him halfway, his intense need to protect her, his determination to be a good lifemate to her, to make her happy and confident.
She also felt that darkness swirling close to the surface, the demon rising to claim her. He ruthlessly pushed it down, holding the animal side of him in check. He was beginning to need her-not the Carpathian needing a lifemate and not the demon roaring to claim her. Nicolas, the man, longed for her smile, for one shared moment of happiness-for a kiss. And that was a seduction in itself.
She nipped him back, grateful he held the wild, dominant side under close rein, desperate for his mouth on hers. He licked her lips again and she opened her mouth to catch the exotic taste that was just Nicolas. Strangely, the tangy flavor of his blood still lingered on her lips, inside her mouth, and she secretly longed for his blood again. She was ashamed of that secret craving, hiding it behind a barrier she was thankful he didn't probe.
The moment Lara opened her mouth to his, his tongue swept inside claiming her. Coaxing her. He was gentler than she would have liked, more tender than she had the strength to stand against, and hotter than she thought possible. His mouth was like a haven of erotic secrets, hot and wet and filled with velvet promise.
Flames danced over her skin, a million wings fluttered inside her stomach, her womb clenched and muscles tightened. He swept her away on a tidal wave of pleasure so that to anchor herself she wrapped both arms around his neck and tunneled her fingers into his thick hair. He tasted like an aphrodisiac, one she could easily become addicted to, all male, heat and desire, a world of sensual pleasure she wanted to drown in.
Nicolas pulled back first, pressing his forehead against hers, breathing her into his lungs. «I cannot think anymore and I need to be able to have a clear head when we fly together.»
«Are you saying I mess up your head?»
He kissed his way down to her mouth again, biting at the lower lip he found so intriguing. «That is exactly what I am saying.»
She laughed. «I like that idea. Your head could use a little messing up.»
He bit down again, this time causing a small sting of pain. He instantly traced over the bite with his tongue, removing the sting as fast as he'd caused it.
«Ow!» Lara pulled away, not wanting to admit to herself that little bite excited her even more. She needed a little distance from him. «I want to fly.» She started to leave the cave, hurrying in a vain attempt
to outrun the arousal twisting through her body.
His fingers settled over her wrist, bringing her to an abrupt halt. «The first lesson is to always scan before you go out into the open. You are looking for blank spaces.»
«I thought we decided that vampires were becoming more adept at hiding themselves.» Annoyed at herself for not remembering, she rubbed the small dragon birthmark over her left ovary, relying on it to warn her.
«No matter how adept they become, we use every tool we can to give ourselves the advantage. I know you really want to do this, but it is always necessary to protect yourself.»
Lara nodded. She'd been too distracted by him, not the promise of flying. «I'm sorry, that was careless of me.» She wished, just once, that he'd be distracted enough by her to forget everything else but her.
«Reach out with your senses and feel the night. Merge with me if you need to and see how spaces should feel. After a while you will be uncomfortable, your mind and skin prickly if you sense the undead near. They are a toxin to our environment and we are sensitive to all things of the earth.»
She reached out as directed, letting her senses expand. It took a little experimentation, but she felt triumphant when she achieved it. She sensed animals, and people. The wind whispered in her ear secrets of the night. «I think we're all right to go.»
He nodded, his fingers sliding from her wrist to her hand and walked her from the cavern to the edge of the cliff.
Lara shivered with excitement. The night was overcast, with large gray clouds, heavy with snow, but everything sparkled, both in the sky and on the ground below, as if she wa
s surrounded by a world of diamonds. «I've never seen the night like this before. I always thought I should want to be able to walk in the sun, but seeing the night like this, I can't imagine what I was thinking.»
«Why would you want to be out where the light hurts your eyes and sun burns your skin?» There was real curiosity in his voice. «The night belongs to us. It is our world and the best part of it. Who would ever want the sun when they can have this?» He spread out his arms to encompass the night. «I might wish that I was not quite so vulnerable when the sun is high, but I would never give this up for the ability to see daylight.»
Lara frowned. «I guess being raised where my skin burned and all the children could play and swim, but I had to hide away, made me long for something I couldn't have.»
He wrapped his arm around her waist, pulling her to him to drop a hard kiss on her pouting lips. «Let me show you why the night is so much better. Aside from the obvious advantage, that it suits our physical hungers…» His voice held a suggestive tone and he smiled unrepentantly when she flicked him a quick glance. «… the night is just plain fun. Have you ever had just plain fun?»
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