Tortured (Cherry Grove Series Book 4)

by Cole Lepley

  “You’re a shitty liar.”

  “Don’t worry about me right now. This is your day.” I laugh once. “Tomorrow we can discuss the tragedy that is my life.”

  “It’s only like that because you allow it to be. You need to start looking out for you and stop worrying about how to make everyone else happy.” She glances quickly over at Sloan. “No matter how much you love them.”

  “It’s not her fault.”

  Tess gets quiet for a minute, obviously holding her tongue so we don’t have to get into the ‘Sloan’s a bitch’ debate again. I know she’s only looking out for me, but sometimes I really don’t deserve it.

  “Do you think things will change now?” she asks, pulling me out of my thoughts.

  “How so?”

  She tilts her head, holding my eyes with hers. “I mean, now that Walker and I are married. Do you think things will still be the same between us?”

  “Of course,” I say quickly. “Why wouldn’t they be?”

  She shakes her head. “I don’t know. I would just hate for anything to change. I want us to always be close.”

  I kiss her forehead and pull her a little closer to me. “You don’t have to worry about that, Bishop. You’ll always have me.”

  She leans her head on my chest as the rest of the song plays. We don’t talk about it anymore, because we don’t have to. I spent the whole day with the same fear as she did. Losing Sloan is something I’ve gotten used to over the years, but losing Tess? I don’t think I could handle that.

  The next day Sloan doesn’t call—and for the next six months, neither do I.

  29

  Some Type Of Love

  Tess- Now

  The last time I saw Perry I kissed him—and now, he’s making me dinner in my kitchen. He got back from Cornell this morning and has been here ever since. To be honest, even though he was only gone a few days, I missed him terribly. I went so long with him being gone I forgot how strong the ache is he leaves behind.

  I’m watching him chop vegetables with impressive precision. There’s something incredibly sexy about such a rough looking guy cooking for you. He looks over his shoulder briefly and laughs.

  “I can feel you staring at me.” He sets his knife down after tossing the peppers into the sauté pan. He turns around and gives me a smirk. “Do you want me to lose a finger? You’re making me nervous.”

  I take another sip from my wine glass. “Sorry, I guess I never knew you could cook.”

  He smiles again. “I had an Italian babysitter who used to bribe me if I helped her make dinner.”

  “How did she do that?”

  “Well,” he says, pausing to adjust the burner. “It probably won’t come as a surprise that my parents didn’t trust me to look after Mack when they went out on the weekends.”

  I laugh. “No, it does not.”

  “So, they hired a lady from down the street to come over and keep an eye on the place until I was like fifteen. She made a deal with me that if I helped her in the kitchen, I could do whatever I wanted and she wouldn’t tell my parents.”

  “Every teenage boy’s dream. She must have known what a little shit you were.”

  He nods. “Yep, she sure did.” He gives the pot another stir and then turns back to me. “The funny thing is, I actually liked it. It even got to the point where I looked forward to it.”

  I like the fact that Perry thinks stories about him being a good person will surprise me. I’ve known him for most of my life and I can be absolutely certain he is one of the best people I’ve ever known.

  “Well, I’m starving so it better be good.”

  He winks at me before turning back to the stove again. “Oh, you know it’ll be good. I’m making it.”

  Smiling to myself, I take another sip of wine. I should try not to drink too much. It typically ends up going straight to my head and I say things I probably shouldn’t.

  Perry puts a lid on the pot and walks over to take a seat across from me at the table. “Twenty more minutes and it should be done.” He steals my glass and downs the rest of my drink, making a face after he swallows. “This tastes like shit.”

  I laugh again, reaching for my now empty cup. “Well, I think it tastes good.”

  He shakes his head. “Nope, I’m getting a beer.” He gets up from the table and walks over to the fridge. I always keep a six-pack in there even though I don’t drink the stuff. Old habit I guess from when Walker was here.

  When he returns to the table he cracks the top with a grin. “That’s much better.”

  The question that’s been burning inside of me since he left is on the tip of my tongue, but I hold it back. Instead, I choose a less sensitive subject.

  “So, do you think you’re ready to start taking clients?”

  He looks thoughtful for a moment and then takes a long pull from his drink. “I guess so. It’s going to be hard to live up to the reputation you two have, but I’m going to try.”

  I give him a playful shove in the arm. “Oh, you’re being modest. You know you’re amazing.” My heart starts to beat a little faster when he smiles back at me and I’m already regretting the second glass of wine.

  “I try,” he says with another smirk.

  I’m staring at his lips again and I can’t stop myself. I keep thinking about how soft they were and how much I really want to kiss him again. The thought that directly follows is that he never said anything about it. He actually kind of pretended it like it never even happened. Maybe girls just kiss him randomly all the time and it seems normal to him?

  The oven timer buzzes and he stands from his chair. I watch him remove a tray of bread and set it on the counter. It’s been a long time since someone tried to take care of me the way Perry is now. It brings up emotions I’ve long pushed aside. I wasn’t sure if I’d ever be ready to be with someone again, but now, I’m reconsidering that.

  Without thinking, I stand up from the table and move to lean against the counter beside him. His eyes meet mine and he raises an eyebrow.

  “Something on your mind?” he asks, wiping his hands on the towel hanging from my stove.

  “Why didn’t you say anything when I kissed you?”

  His eyes widen a little and he fights a smile. “What did you want me to say?”

  I shrug. “I don’t know. Something.”

  “I kiss you all the time.”

  I shake my head. “Not like that.”

  He plays with his tongue ring, moving it across his bottom lip. I’m starting to think he didn’t know what to say. It’s not something I’ve ever done before.

  My eyes cast down to the floor and I feel him move closer. His hand is in my hair, brushing it from my face. When I look up at him, my breath catches in my throat.

  “Did you like it?” he asks.

  I nod. The hairs on the back of my neck stand on end as he moves his hand to cup the side of my face. Only inches are separating us from being flush against each other.

  He wets his lips, studying my face. His thumb trails down my cheek.

  “Do you want me to do it again?”

  Does he really expect me to answer that? I can barely form a complete thought at this point. Instead of words, when I open my mouth a mixture between a sigh and some sort of moan comes out.

  He laughs against my mouth and then whispers, “I’ll take that as a yes.”

  I close my eyes before his lips even touch mine. They’re warm and soft like before, but this time—he kisses me slower. His tongue slips inside my mouth and I grip the front of his shirt, pulling him closer. He backs me against the fridge and the handle digs into my side. I don’t really mind though—other parts of him are digging into me as well. Just when I think he has stolen all of my air, he pulls back and kisses me once more softly.

  “Was that better?” he asks in that deep, sexy voice.

  When I’m sure the butterflies in my stomach won’t spill out everywhere, I lean forward and kiss him again.

  “Yes.”

/>   Perry didn’t spend the night after we finally ate dinner. I think he thought that if he did it would mean something different than it had before. I’m pretty sure he would be right.

  We didn’t talk about this kiss either. The entire time I’ve known him we’ve been skirting the line between harmless flirting and full-on declarations of love. Somewhere along the way, we came to a silent decision not to act on any of those feelings. Now that we have—I’m not sure what happens from here.

  The fact that he literally proposed to Sloan last week is still fresh in my mind. Perry never does anything half-assed. If he said it, he meant it. I know he loves her, but I also know he loves me too. The only thing I have to figure out now is if the love he feels for me is the same.

  There’s a difference between loving someone and being in love with them. A very big one. If I’m being honest, a part of me has always been in love with Perry. I remember sitting in the grass at the playground watching them play basketball for hours and never getting bored. Sometimes I would play too—but mostly, I just liked to watch him. He’s always had this outward confidence that was irresistible to me. Girls always flocked to him, but the moment he saw Sloan, it was all over. She took that confidence from him with one flip of her bleached, blonde hair and he’s never really gotten it back.

  My internal obsessing is interrupted when the bell above my door dings. I step out to the front and smile when I see Perry walking toward me. He’s carrying a small paper bag.

  “I thought you might want to take a little break,” he says, smirking. He sets the bag down on the counter and I fight every urge inside of me not to tackle him against it.

  I walk over to him and come to a stop just out of reach. “I guess I have time for that.”

  He grins wider, leaning into me slightly. “Oh, yeah? What else do you have time for?”

  Before I can answer, he tugs me by the waist until I land against his chest. His lips hover over mine and my stomach resumes the summersaults it’s been doing since last night.

  Feeling bold, I trail my finger down his chest. “I have at least an hour before my next appointment.”

  His hand threads through my hair, pulling me even closer. “Perfect.”

  30

  Say When

  Perry- Now

  The entire time I was at Cornell I thought about Tess. The entire fucking time. When she kissed me in her garage before I left—I was shook. It caught me so completely off guard that I didn’t know what to say. So, I pretended it didn’t happen. And now? I can’t stop kissing her. Literally every time I see her all I can think about is how amazing her lips feel against mine. How I can’t believe we waited so long to actually do it—and how I’m not sure what it will mean moving forward.

  I’d be totally lying if I said I’m not still thinking about Sloan. My proposal was real and with her feelings still in the air, it creates a problem I didn’t see coming. I have a real shot with Tess, and I’m desperate not to screw it up. If only I hadn’t been so impulsive. Sometimes falling into old habits is easier than trying for something greater. But I guess I always learn the hard way.

  Today was the first day I technically worked at her shop. I had several clients and it actually went really well. So, to celebrate my return to the tattoo world I’ve decided to take Tess out tonight. A part of me is terrified. We’ve gone out together a million times over the years, but tonight feels different. Tonight feels like a date.

  I’m back at my apartment getting ready when my phone rings. I glance at the display and immediately wish I hadn’t. Taking a deep breath, I answer.

  “Hey, Sloan.”

  “I tried to call you last night. You didn’t answer.”

  She sounds irritated, which pisses me off. She’s the one on a trip with Johnny right now. I didn’t expect to hear from her at all.

  “Well, I was busy.”

  She scoffs. “Busy doing what?”

  I laugh bitterly while trying to find a decent shirt in my closet. “That’s not really any of your business, is it?”

  “Really? That’s how you’re going to be now?” She sighs heavily. “Perry, I’m sorry about how I acted the other day in your car. You just surprised me.”

  Her voice is almost background noise as I continue to rummage through my closet. When’s the last time I bought clothes? I don’t want to take Tess to dinner looking like a thug.

  “Perry? Are you listening to me?”

  “Yes,” I say quickly. My tone is short, but I really don’t want to be bothered with this at the moment. It’s bad enough that I have to figure out what’s going on between me and Tess. Adding Sloan to the mix and her constantly changing mind, only makes this that much harder.

  “You sound angry.”

  I squeeze my eyes shut and take a few deep breaths through my nose. “I’m sorry, okay? I worked all day and now I’m running late for dinner.”

  I regret the words as soon as they escape my mouth.

  “Who are you having dinner with?”

  “Tess.”

  “Tess, huh?”

  “Yeah, so?”

  “I just think it’s weird you’re spending so much time with her. You two work together and now you’re having dinner.”

  I finally spot a black button down in the back of my closet and pull it angrily from its hanger. “What’s your point, Sloan?” I balance the phone against my ear while pulling the shirt on.

  “Is there something you need to tell me?”

  This causes me to laugh. “You’re really one to talk. You have dinner with Johnny every night. You sleep with Johnny every fucking night. It’s total bullshit for you to even think you have the right to question what I’m doing.” I switch the phone to my other ear and finish buttoning my shirt. “And just so you know, I’m not doing anything. I’m just having dinner with my friend.”

  I know it’s a lie as soon as I say it, but the last thing I need is for Sloan to go off on some rampage because she thinks I’m with someone else. She does it every time we break up. I’ve never been able to form a meaningful relationship outside of her and that scares me too. This thing with Tess has to be real. If we jump into this and it doesn’t work out, we’ll never be the same. I’ll lose my girlfriend and my best friend at the same time.

  “Okay, fine,” Sloan says finally. “I’ll call you when I get back then?”

  She says it like a question and my stomach sinks a little. Obviously she’s still under the impression that my proposal is still an option—and at this point, I’m not sure that it is.

  “Yep, I’ll talk to you later. Have fun.” I end the call before she even responds. We could talk in circles all night and still not get anywhere. Tonight, I need to focus on something I started, and I’m not sure I can finish it.

  I grab my keys off the dresser and take a deep breath. I’m not going to panic until I find out how Tess feels. Maybe I’m blowing this whole thing up in my head for no reason?

  When I picked her up, she was quiet. That’s not really like her, and I find myself acting weird too. I kept glancing over at her out of the corner of my eye while trying to remember where I’m driving to. The dress she has on and the way she smells is distracting. Tess always smells amazing—but tonight, I want to devour her. Every darkened curl is meticulously in place and that tight little dress is hugging every curve in just the right way. I’ve had to stop myself from my salacious thoughts several times already and we haven’t even made it to the restaurant yet. I think I’m in trouble.

  After parking the car, I get out before her so I can get her door. It’s a fairly normal reaction for me because I’ve always done it for Sloan, but I’ve never been in a situation to do it for Tess.

  She smiles up at me and takes my hand as I help her from the car. When we start walking toward the entrance, I keep her hand in mine, and it makes my heart beat faster. We’ve held hands countless times and never did it make my chest ache like this. Literally everything we’re doing now feels different, but I can’t stop
myself. I like the way it feels. I don’t think I realized how lonely I was until I kissed her. It’s been so long since I’ve actually felt close to someone. Sloan doesn’t count. She never made me feel secure. Not even once.

  We get a table by the window in the back that has a view of the harbor. Just enough of a romantic atmosphere to make this awkward. Maybe I should have chosen a less obvious place? She’s going to know something’s up and I have no idea what she’s going to think about it.

  Silently, we browse the menu for a moment until she finally speaks.

  “I’ve never been here before,” she says quietly, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.

  She looks nervous too, which makes me feel a little better.

  “Me either,” I say with a smile. “I wanted to try something different.”

  Tess laughs before taking a sip of her water. “Something different, huh? I’d say that is a new trend for you.”

  I close my menu, grinning wider. “You noticed that.” I reach for her hand and she lets me take it willingly. “I guess I wanted to see how it would feel.”

  Her eyes remained focused on our hands. “How what would feel?”

  “Being with someone that I’ve spent my whole life being afraid to love.”

  She nods, but doesn’t look up at me. “Are you still afraid?”

  I laugh once. “Fucking right I am.”

  Tess finally looks up at me and laughs too. “Well, I’m fucking scared too, okay?”

  The waiter walks by us and continues to another table. I grip her hand a little tighter. I might not get another moment like this and I’ll go crazy if I don’t tell her what I’m thinking.

  “Listen, I don’t want to put any pressure on this. I’m not sure what’s going on between us, but so far, I’m not complaining.”

  Tess smiles. “I’m not either.”

  “Okay, so let’s just see where this goes and if it feels right we’ll know.”

  She raises an eyebrow. “And if it doesn’t?”