Something Green

by Drew Zachary

  Lockhart merely sniffed and vanished.

  "He better not be back in my room," Yanya said without heart. She also didn't go to see, since it was pretty much a sure thing that's exactly where Lockhart had gone.

  "Thanks, Joe. We'll get it done faster if you help." DB headed back downstairs, wondering what exactly Lockhart was hiding.

  Jesse went with him and stood in the middle of the room, looking around. "We need much better light. Do you think he'd hide stuff in the walls or the floor?"

  "Do you think he'd hide stuff in the floor?" Lockhart mimicked in a high-pitched squeak. Apparently Yanya's room was down one ghost.

  "Look, why don't you go back upstairs?" Jesse said to him. "You're not going to be able to stop DB. He's too stubborn for a mere ghost to sway."

  Well, that was a blatant lie, but DB didn't say anything about it, given the circumstance. Instead, he looked around and pretended Lockhart hadn't said anything. "The floor, I'll bet. Hell, maybe both the floor and the walls." DB put his mask back on and filled a bucket up with water from the little sink in the corner, adding a liberal amount of bleach to the liquid.

  Lockhart left with a growl, but DB suspected he'd be back. They were close to something, DB could feel it.

  Joe came down the stairs, his mask gone and the dirt streak bigger. "Okay, patrol is sending a car around to check out her house, and a couple of guys who owe me a favor are going to watch for a few hours until I can get there. I can't actually do anything until there's a threat or a damn good reason."

  "Right, I forgot about that. Jesse, you should go and pop in. Make sure she's okay." He might bitch and moan, but it was handy, having a ghost for times like this.

  Jesse narrowed his eyes and seemed to be trying to come up with a reason to stay.

  "It was your idea that she was going to need protection," DB pointed out drily.

  "Damn it." Jesse sighed and looked at Joe. "You. Hands off my boyfriend and stop staring at his ass." Then he vanished.

  Joe was looking around like he was trying to see where Jesse was. "Is he going to go to her house?"

  "Yeah, he's gone." DB looked around at the empty space. "Okay, let's get this mold and dust and dirt gone."

  "Just about the best offer I've had in months." Joe laughed and shook his head. "Sadly, that's not even a lie. Where's the mop?"

  "Over in the corner there." He put the bucket in the middle of the room and grabbed a big sponge, starting in on the walls. "Dating's not easy at all, is it?"

  "Dating sucks. Trying to date sucks even more." Joe went to get the mop. "Me and David, we were good. We were pretty happy. We were content. And now it's just me, and I'm finally ready to reach out, at least, but I have no idea where to start, you know?"

  "Yeah, I get that. I really get that." DB nodded hard. Hell, if it hadn't been for Jesse, he'd still be on his own.

  Joe came back and shoved the mop into the bucket, then wrung it out by hand. "But you're doing okay -- even with Jesse around, and that's got to make things interesting. Uh, not prying. Just saying," he added hastily.

  DB laughed. "Jesse definitely makes things interesting."

  "How did you find him?" Joe started mopping, soaking the floor and moving the dirt around in puddles. "I mean, not everyone has a ghost around. Well, other than Yanya."

  "He came with the office. Seriously."

  "Huh." Joe gave him a long look. "Did he die there or something? How long's he been dead, anyway?"

  "He died in the eighties. I was the first live person who could see him. At first I wanted him gone, but he grew on me." And how. DB chuckled, scrubbing harder, wanting to get the job done.

  "I can see why he'd want to stick around." Joe said it easily enough, nice and casual, but he was looking at DB again.

  Man, Jesse'd been right. Joe was totally flirting with him. Even after he'd basically said he was taken. DB had to admit that it felt good, having a real live person think he was worth flirting with. "Yeah, it's my ability to blow smoke rings," he joked, trying to defuse things.

  "I'm sure that's it. The smoke rings." Joe's hand curled around the mop handle and his eyes seemed to go dark. "The blowing part I can see, though."

  DB's cheeks went red. "Joe. Man. I'm with someone."

  "Uh-huh. So you said. But you haven't even said his name, so I'm thinking you're maybe not as taken as you say. Taken is safe sometimes, but maybe not the final word." He looked around and shrugged. "I'm way over here. Not touching. Just saying... I'm interested and I don't mind if Jesse watches."

  DB stared at Joe. "You don't mind if... Well, I would!" It would be creepy. Well, and then there was the fact he was already involved with Jesse.

  "So he doesn't stick around now?" Joe's head tilted like a confused dog's.

  "Oh, Christ. It is Jesse, okay?" God damn it, now Joe was going to really think he was a loon.

  For a long moment Joe didn't say anything. His head tilted the other way, though. Then back. "You're involved with a ghost? How does that work, exactly?"

  "Remember that thing where I didn't want to talk about my sex life? That goes, like, triple now." Jesus. How does it work. He wouldn't be talking about it even if he knew the answer to that.

  "Oh, come on! I don't even have a ghost!" Joe swiped at the floor with his mop. "I mean, at least you get to talk to someone when you're... uh. Okay, I see your point. But still, you gotta know that the whole thing is intriguing."

  DB gave Joe a wide smile. "Well, at least you didn't say crazy."

  "Crazy? My last lover had visions. You're a walk in the park, really, with the added bonus of having a spy." Joe grinned back at him. "Is he cute?"

  "Of course he's cute -- you think I'm going to take up with an ugly ghost?" DB couldn't quite believe he was having this conversation.

  "Love is blind," Joe said loftily. "He died pretty, that's cool. I'm kind of glad he didn't find David. He wasn't so pretty. Still, I would've kept him, assuming he could talk to me when I was... uh."

  "Yeah, okay. We're definitely crossing some weird friend line here."

  "You think?" Joe didn't seem so sure.

  "Yes." He was very sure he didn't want to hear about or think about or especially picture Joe jacking off while his not so pretty because of the way he died dead lover's ghost watched.

  Christ, it was going to take forever to get that image out of his head.

  Joe sighed and started mopping again. "Okay, so where were we? You're in love with a ghost, and off the market. Got it." He froze suddenly and looked at DB with wide eyes. "Jesus, Jesse must hate me."

  "Uh... well..."

  "Oh, man. I bet he saw me looking at your ass, too!"

  DB decided this particular bit of wall really needed a hard scrubbing.

  "Jesus." DB could hear Joe splooshing the mop into the bucket again. "I gotta apologize to him. Do you think he'll listen?"

  "Yeah, I imagine he will." He had a hunch Jesse would be thrilled. And would lord it over him for weeks.

  Suddenly, the corner of the stone he was washing gave way. "Hey! I think I've found something."

  The mop clattered to the floor, and Joe came over in a rush. "What? What happened? Damn it, hang on." He jogged away again and came back with a flashlight.

  Lockhart suddenly appeared, waving his hands around. "No, no, no. No, you don't. Leave it!"

  Well, that settled that. "Hey, Joe? Lockhart's back and he's annoyed. I think there's something behind this cinder block." DB pulled his pocket knife out and began to work around the edges. "Yeah, this is definitely loose."

  "Really? Fantastic!" Joe held the light with one hand and tried to help with the other, but mostly he just tangled them up and put his fingers in danger. "I'll just hold the light, shall I?"

  "Yeah, that would be good. Lockhart! Shut up!" DB got one edge free and started working the stone back and forth, sliding it slowly out. Excitement danced in his belly, and Lockhart's protests kept rolling right over him. Like he'd stop because Lockhart said so without gi
ving a reason. Right.

  "Can you see anything?" Joe was pushed far too close for DB's comfort, but he seemed focused on shining the light and trying to look in the hole DB was making, and not on the way his body was spreading heat along DB's side.

  "No. I've almost got it, though." The stone suddenly gave way, making DB step back suddenly into Joe.

  "Easy, got you." Joe's hands settled on DB's hips, steadying him and keeping him from falling. "Okay?" Joe held on a moment too long, a long moment when Joe's eyes were too close, too dark. But Joe blinked and stepped back, holding the flashlight up once more. "What do we have?" he asked, clearing his throat.

  "Step away from there!" Lockhart demanded. "It's not yours!"

  DB sighed and continued to ignore Lockhart. Man, Jesse was going to rant forever about this. Not to mention really rub in the bit about how he didn't know that Joe wanted to be more than just friends. He turned his attention back to the hidey-hole; there was definitely something there.

  Reaching in, he pulled out a little bag. He thought maybe it was velvet, but it was currently covered in dust and mold. He was surprised it didn't disintegrate as he handled it.

  "Mine!" Lockhart yelled, and suddenly he vanished. One moment he was stomping around and being loud, and the next he'd popped right out. DB took a moment to be grateful for the silence.

  "Oh, gross." Joe shone the light on it and made a face. "Maybe whatever is in there won't be slimy. Let me get a piece of paper to dump it onto, and gloves. That's evidence, DB."

  DB waited until Joe ripped a page out of his notebook and laid it on the floor, and then he carefully opened the top of the bag and dumped out the contents.

  Something green twinkled in the light Joe held, and DB leaned in. It was jewelry. Expensive jewelry by the looks of it. There was a necklace, a pair of earrings, a brooch, and a bracelet. The gold needed a good polish, but he'd bet his last dollar those were emeralds and diamonds sparkling in the light.

  A lot of emeralds and diamonds.

  Joe exhaled slowly and then gave a low whistle. "Well. I think maybe that's worth haunting someone about, yeah. That's actual treasure, if they're real." The flashlight threw out glittering shots of light. "Too bad you can't take it with you. I better call this in."

  "Yeah. Wow." DB wondered who it had belonged to and why Lockhart had never sold it. Had Lockhart been killed for this? Or had he just had a heart attack before he had a chance to unload it?

  Joe moved off to the side and made a call on his cell phone, talking in a low voice. "And make sure to bring in Charity Lockhart. If this stuff is real, someone is looking for it, and it wouldn't surprise me if they think she has the stuff. It's up her alley, not her father's. We just need to figure out who might be looking for it. And why no one's been onto Charity or Yanya about it before now?"

  A moment or two later he hung up and came back, standing close to look at the jewels again. "The insurance fraud guys are going to be all over this, DB."

  "You think there might be a reward?" If there was, he just might be able to hire a secretary back on. That would be sweet.

  "I bet there is, if the owner was legit and it was actually stolen. Maybe through the insurance company." Joe grinned at him. "I'll look into it, see if I can find anything. They might forget to tell you."

  "That would suck -- it's my find." He shot Joe a wild grin. "Thanks."

  Lockhart suddenly reappeared and started yelling from over DB's left shoulder. "Mine! Put them back! You idiots, you're going to ruin everything!"

  Joe was grinning back, oblivious to the noise. "No problem. You can buy me a beer."

  "They are not yours -- you're dead. I believe the expression is 'you can't take it with you.'" He rolled his eyes at Joe. "Lockhart seems to think the jewels are his. He's back, and louder than ever."

  Joe blinked and shook his head. "This is so weird," he muttered. "Okay, why does he think they're his? Is he still here?"

  "They're mine because they're in my house!" Lockhart's face was twisted in rage. "They're mine because they're supposed to be the nest egg for my family! They're mine because the dirty rat who was fencing them through me is dead and there's no one looking for them anymore! He didn't know they were still here, and now he's gone and there's no chance he'll figure it out! Mine!"

  "He's a little deluded," he told Joe. "Though I think the guy who was after them is dead, so Charity might not be in trouble after all." He turned suddenly to Lockhart. "How is this supposed to be a nest egg for your family if they don't even know it's here? Hell, your daughter sold this place as soon as she could. Not to mention she's a better fence than you ever were."

  "She is not," Lockhart snapped. "Well. Maybe she is. But I didn't know that, did I? Not until a while ago. I've been watching McDougall and the old cow he stole those from, waiting for her to replace them or stop nattering about them. She got her insurance money, it's not my fault she didn't have enough insurance on them." Lockhart smiled, the look greedy. "She only got a tenth their value."

  "Yeah, well, now she's getting them back." He frowned as a thought occurred to him. "How exactly were you planning on cashing in?"

  Lockhart looked unimpressed and a lot sulky, his arms folding over his chest. "Well, you can see me. Yanya can see me. I figured it was just a matter of making Charity see me. I was going to start working on that soon, now that the coast is clear. Then she could come and have tea or something, come down here and I'd show her where they were."

  "Then why were you sticking around here and making Yanya nuts?" Man, Lockhart really was an idiot. The only reason he'd found the jewelry was because Lockhart had started haunting the place, making Yanya crazy. If the guy had left when she'd asked, he never would have been called in.

  "Because I needed to make sure Yanya didn't have them. I couldn't see in the damn hole -- it was too dark!"

  DB started to laugh.

  "What?" Joe was smiling at him uncertainly.

  "Shut up," Lockhart muttered. "And put my emeralds down. Bastard."

  "Lockhart wasn't sure the emeralds were still here. Because it was too dark." He burst into more laughter. He couldn't help it; the whole situation tickled his funny bone. There was no danger lurking, unless you counted the mold, and no bad guys left alive anymore; there was just Lockhart and his inability to see in the dark.

  Joe's smile grew as Lockhart fumed. "You're kidding. That's it?"

  "Yep, that's it." DB turned to Lockhart and beamed. "I would shake your hand if I could, Lockhart. Thanks to you, I get credit for finding the emeralds, hopefully with a reward attached, I get paid for getting you out of Yanya's hair, and I get credit for turning in your daughter."

  All in all, not a bad day's work.

  Lockhart looked utterly disgusted. "And what am I supposed to do now?"

  Joe laughed and started cleaning up. "I'll go tell Yanya the good news, and to send the investigators down."

  "You should do whatever it is that folks are supposed to do when they die. Or you could go haunt Charity. I'm sure she'd appreciate the support." Or not; she seemed to want nothing to do with her father. It would be a nice bit of irony if she wound up haunted by him.

  Lockhart's eyes narrowed. "I could haunt you."

  Joe vanished up the stairs, whistling.

  "You could, but you'd have to take that up with Jesse." He wasn't sure he wanted to witness a ghost version of a smackdown, but he was pretty sure that Jesse would hand one out if Lockhart tried it.

  "That guy from the eighties?" Lockhart looked a little uncomfortable. "I think he might be queer."

  DB snorted. "Ya think?"

  "Yeah, he's a little light in the... Oh." Lockhart gave DB a fast look and actually backed up. "I think I'll just go somewhere else. Between the guy upstairs dressed like a woman and the queer ghost, I have better places to be. Thanks for wasting the last ten for years for me." He sounded fairly disgusted with the way things had turned out.

  "You're welcome!" DB turned, expecting to find Jesse behind
him.

  "Hey." Jesse grinned at him and winked. "What did I miss? Where's Joe? Ohhhh, shiny!"

  "Upstairs, making calls and stuff. I think he gave Yanya the good news, too. Lockhart's not going to be hanging around here anymore. I think I'm going to get a reward for finding the shiny, too. Oh, and Lockhart threatened to start haunting me until I reminded him that position was already filled." He rocked back on his heels, feeling pretty damn good.

  "Awesome!" Jesse moved close and kissed him, a quick press of lips and then tingles. "Wanna celebrate?"

  "Well, yeah. When we get home. For now I have to guard the goods." He should probably gather up his stuff, too. And Yanya so owed him extra for cleaning her basement as well. There was no reason she couldn't use it now. He was adding dry cleaning to the bill as well, or maybe he’d just charge her for a whole new outfit to replace the one he was wearing; he was gross.