Wine and Whiskey (Surviving Absolution #1)

by Nikki Belaire

  Before she can respond, Carrie throws open the patio door and bursts into the kitchen. “I swear to God I’m going to elope if that woman doesn’t stop coming up with these fu…” She catches Shae’s eye and clenches her mouth before continuing, “Sorry! I mean, crazy ideas.”

  Shae tries to stifle a laugh, knowing Sheila’s enthusiasm doesn’t match her daughter’s. Her mother desires an elegant, romantic ceremony, while Carrie just wants the party. “What did she do now?”

  “She found a website where you can have your shoes dyed to match your bridesmaids’ dresses. Oh, my God! It’s not 1997!” She stares at her buzzing phone and groans. “I’ve got to go.” As she walks past, she pats Nick on the stomach. “Nice eight pack. Try going shirtless outside of bed sometimes too.” Her arms wrap around Shae in a quick hug. “I love you. I’ll see you back at the house.” Ruffling Max’s hair, she winks at him. “Sorry I jacked with you earlier. Stay cool.”

  Shae can’t help but smile as the guys watch, wide-eyed, as her friend jogs through the foyer and out the front door. It will take a while for them to get used to the whirlwind that is Carrie.

  “Damn, she wears me out.” Max blows out a long, low whistle before he sits down and nods to her. “Did Nick tell you about May's, the restaurant we went to when we were gone last week? You would’ve loved it. They had Bananas Foster waffles and these huge, red velvet pancakes.” His eyes widen as his fingers curl around the outside of his plate. “And these amazing crème brûlée crepes. I don’t even know how they made those. But they were unbelievable.”

  Her mouth waters at his description of the ultimate breakfast dessert buffet. “It sounds like heaven.”

  “It was. Until we met the owner.”

  “Why? What happened?”

  “I’m expecting this sweet, old lady baking goodies in the back.” He gives a small shudder. “May turns out to be this sixty-year-old tattooed biker guy with a goatee and ponytail wearing a greasy, tie-dyed T-shirt. I’ve never been so disgusted in my life.”

  She bursts out laughing, while Nick rolls his eyes at Max’s disappointment. Her earlier embarrassment fades a bit with the easy-going banter between them. Too much of a gentleman to say anything, Max never mentions what happened upstairs. But being caught naked in Nick’s bed stings a bit. Her cheeks grow hotter. Or, maybe her own guilt flusters her. She’s no longer the person her mother wanted her to be, yet she can’t go back. And doesn’t really want to.

  As they eat, Max glances at his buzzing phone and nods to Nick. “Carter’s here.”

  Nick squeezes her hand before standing up. “We’ll be back in a few minutes.”

  The pitiful look on Max’s face about leaving his plate makes her laugh again. “Don’t worry. I’ll save some bacon for you.”

  “What about the pancakes?”

  “Sorry, I can’t make any guarantees with those.”

  With a mischievous smirk, he scoops up the platter, syrup bottle, and a fork before walking backward out of the kitchen.

  “You fight dirty.”

  He points at the food and then at her. “That’s how it works. Find your enemy’s weakness, and use it against them.”

  While she giggles, his smile disappears and his eyes widen, as if he suddenly realizes something. All his playfulness evaporates. “I’d better go.”

  Not wanting to be wasteful, she picks at her food. Max’s worry is contagious, a reminder of the threats, even amidst their lightheartedness.

  “Excuse me? Do you know where Nick is?”

  Her head flies up at the unfamiliar voice. A man, maybe twenty-one or twenty-two, stands in the doorway. He brushes thick, black hair from his forehead, but it falls back into the same place, almost covering one eye. “He told me to let him know when the truck was ready.”

  “He’s in his office with Carter and Max.”

  He glances over his shoulder at the closed door. “Oh, okay.” Turning back to her, he wipes his hand on his black and red skater T-shirt before extending it to her. “I’m Spencer, by the way.”

  “It’s nice to meet you. I’m Shae.”

  His face hardens for a split second as his hand painfully squeezes hers. “I know who you are.” The ominous look is gone as fast as it came, replaced with an enormous smile. “I mean, I’m a huge fan. I love your music.”

  A feather of fear tickles the hair on the back of her neck before floating away. The stress of last night must be making her imagine things. She smiles and shifts into professional mode. “Thank you. I’m very flattered.”

  His head bobs with enthusiasm, shaking his bangs over his eye again. “My girlfriend loves to work out to your music. We listen to it every day.”

  “Oh no, you’re going to get tired of it at that rate.”

  He shrugs his shoulders and puts his hands up. “Nah, it’s good. It makes her happy, so what can you do?”

  Nick walks in as they talk and rests his hand on her shoulder. She wraps her fingers around his, trying to eradicate her fear, fighting her irrational apprehension. “Spencer majors in facilities management at CSU and works here part-time, taking care of the house and property. He’s going to help us move your things.”

  “I appreciate the help. I’ll try not to load you up with too much stuff.”

  “No worries. There’s plenty of room in the truck, and I’ve got lots of empty boxes in the back in case we need them.”

  Nick nods and glances at his watch. “Okay, I need to make one more phone call. Let’s plan to leave in about an hour.”

  Spencer smiles again. “Ready whenever you are, boss.”

  After the garage door closes, Nick sits down next to her, his frown conveying another worry. She takes a deep breath. “What’s wrong?”

  “I don’t think it’s a good idea for Carrie to stay at your house by herself.”

  Her shoulders droop against the guilt weighing on them. The threat extends to her friends, another painful reminder of the cruelty of Nick’s life. “Juan could hurt Carrie.”

  “I can’t be sure. I don’t want to take any chances, and there’s no reason she can’t stay here.”

  She rubs her fingers across his shirt sleeve, tugging the ribbed fabric on the edge. His bicep flexes as he lifts his arm to stroke her cheek, warming under his gentle touch, stirring her desire to return to his bedroom and let their troubles fade away. “I would love it, but I don’t know if she’ll agree.”

  “All we can do is try.”

  He starts to stand up, but she grasps his hand. “Can I ask you something?”

  “Anything.”

  “It’s about Spencer.”

  His grip tightens around her fingers, his body tense. “What about him?”

  Now, she has him worried for no real reason. A look that gives her a weird vibe? She sounds like an egotistical diva saying a fan gives her the creeps. She has to let it go. “Do you think he minds working on a Sunday? He probably has stuff for school.”

  He smiles and pulls her up, his fingers gliding around her waist. “From what he’s told me, he can use the money. But I’ll send him home right after we’re finished.”

  * * * *

  Carrie’s stretched out on her bed flipping through wedding magazines when they arrive at the house. Orange sticky notes with scribbled comments mark several pages. She winks at Nick before smiling. “Sorry, you two. I’m out of condoms, and I… ” She tilts her head and squints at Shae. “What’s wrong?”

  Curling her dress around her fingers, Shae purses her lips before speaking. “You might be in danger here by yourself. We want you to stay at Nick’s house too.”

  His chest burns at her straightforward explanation. So matter–of-fact about the worry she carries. Almost as if she accepts a life with him guarantees fear and violence. A little bit more of her sweet innocence stolen.

  Carrie frowns before shrugging her shoulders. “I’ll be fine. What does Juan care about me?”

  “He wants to hurt Nick. Getting to you or me would do that.”

>   “This is too weird.” Her eyes widen. “Shit! I haven’t even told Nathan yet about what happened. He’s going to freak out about you, let alone me moving in with you guys.” She shakes her head. “I’m sorry, but I can’t do it.”

  Shae sits down next to her on the bed, smoothing her skirt over her knees. “I’m sorry to pull you into this, but I’m scared for you. Please come with us. We’ll talk to Nathan and convince him it’s okay.”

  “I don’t know. Won’t it be awkward?”

  “I promise it won’t be. Please, Carrie? I want you to stay with us. I don’t know what I’ll do if something happens to you.” Shae’s voice cracks, fear strangling her plea.

  He takes over, nodding in agreement. Carrie has to know he means it as much as she does. “We both want you there. I would feel better knowing you’re safe, and you and Shae can keep living together until the wedding.”

  She looks from him to Shae, her mouth downturned as her brow furrows. “Okay, let me talk to Nathan. If he doesn’t go too ballistic, I’ll do it.”

  Shae wraps her arm around her friend and lays her head against her shoulder. “Thank you. I know this is unfair to you, but it will be good, I swear.”

  “Yes, living at a gorgeous house on the beach with a huge pool is awful. You’re really asking too much, but somehow I’ll power through.”

  “Let me get my stuff, and then I’ll help you pack.”

  He rubs Shae’s back, nodding toward the hallway. “I’ll be there in just minute, sweetness.” Once she walks out of the room, he turns to Carrie. “Thanks for doing this. I know you don’t really want to, but she needs you.”

  “Listen, I don’t mean to be a bitch, but this is fucked up.” She rubs her crossed arms, as if trying to calm her anxiety. “I’ll do anything for Shae, and I can’t let her go through this alone. But all of this scares the shit out of me, and it’s really going to piss off Jason and Nathan. I keep having to defend you to them. If anything else happens, I don’t know if I can keep doing it.”

  At least she’s honest and confirms what he suspects. Her support is precarious at best. He can’t mess this up. “I’m sorry you’ve had to do that.”

  She bends over and gathers up the magazines, putting them into a neat stack and setting them on the bedside table. The only order in a seemingly tornado-ravaged room, signaling her worry. “Yeah, well, I do it for her because I love her, and she loves you. That’s what best friends do.”

  His heart races. Carrie holds the answer to the mystery he’s never been able to figure out. “How do you know?”

  “How do I know what?”

  “That she loves me. She never says it.”

  Carrie blows out a long breath. “Shit. I shouldn’t be talking about this with you.”

  “Please tell me. I have to know.”

  She coils her hair around the back of her neck, shaking her head, fighting with herself. He forces himself to keep quiet, not say anything to make himself the loser of her internal battle. “Her mom…had some issues. She’s the reason Shae and Evan broke up. Right after she told Evan she loved him, Jackie went berserk and gave her an ultimatum. Her or Evan. Of course, she chose her mom. When she told Evan it was over, he was really hurt and said some things he shouldn’t have.”

  Fucking bastard. Heat creeps up his neck and face, his jaw aching from his clenching teeth. “What did he say?”

  “That her mom was crazy, and if Shae really loved him, she would choose him. He threw it back in her face she said she loved him and then broke up with him.”

  The image of her being talked to like that makes his chest pound, providing a concrete reason to despise Evan beyond just his jealousy of him being Shae’s first love. “Son of a bitch.”

  She shakes her head. “Evan’s a good guy. He was devastated. He wanted to marry her, and she broke his heart. He tried to make it up to her, begged her to forgive him, called tons of times, sent flowers, but she never got over it.”

  He drives his hand through his hair, trying to keep his temper in check. This bastard’s vindictiveness stands between him and Shae, keeping her from letting him in completely. “If she doesn’t tell me she loves me, then she thinks she can’t hurt me.”

  “Something like that. All this with her mom and Evan really messed with her head. She doesn’t trust herself, or anyone else.”

  “Except you.”

  Her eyes widen as she meets his. “I’ll never make her choose. I wouldn’t do that to her, if that’s what you’re thinking.”

  “No, I wasn’t. But, if you did, I would step aside. She’d be better off with you than me, anyway.” A commitment to himself as well as to Carrie. After what he’s put Shae through, he’ll always do what’s best for her, even if it kills him.

  “You really love her, don’t you?”

  More than anything or anyone, including himself. “Yes.”

  “Then make sure nothing else happens, or I won’t be able to stop Jason and Nathan from trying to get her to end things with you.” She picks up her phone. “I’d better call Nathan.”

  Chapter Nine

  “I’m going to miss this bed.”

  Her heart flip-flops at Nick winking at her, sprawled across her yellow patchwork quilt, his hands behind his head, while she folds clothes and tucks them into her suitcase. With the outline of his stomach muscles pressed against his taut shirt and broad shoulders spread over her pillow, he still exudes the sexy confidence that attracted her to him in the first place.

  The only difference is—now she loves him.

  “How can you miss it? You’ve hardly been in it.”

  “This is where we made love for the first time. You finally let me into your heart a little.”

  A huge smile crosses her face. Carrie’s affinity for the naughty rubs off on her when she least expects it.

  “What?”

  She shakes her head. Telling him can only lead to trouble. “It’s nothing.”

  “Now you have to say it.”

  Unable to stop smiling, she covers her mouth with her hand. “I can’t. It’s too embarrassing.”

  He props up on his elbow, the bed creaking from his shifting weight. Her cheeks heat at his relentless gaze. “Tell me.”

  “Fine.” She shrugs her shoulders before dropping her favorite bracelet into its velvet bag. “I must be tired because I thought you were going to say it was the first time I let you into my panties.”

  “What? Here I was trying to be romantic and you’re being dirty?” He rolls off the bed and stalks toward her, lust darkening his eyes. A quiver rolls through her as he pulls her to him, one hand gliding from her waist to the bottom of her dress. “So, you want me to get into your panties, huh?”

  “No, no, no.” She pushes on his chest and gives him her most serious look, which only eggs him on as he slides his fingertips up her thigh, brushing against the lacy fabric. “Spencer and Max are just down the hall.”

  Ignoring her protests, he slips a finger inside and strokes her soft folds, holding her tight against him as her knees dip, succumbing to his touch. His mouth trails kisses up her neck before his husky voice fills her ear. “Is this what you like?”

  Her eyes drift shut as her lips part, releasing a small gasp at his finger curling inside her. Clutching his shirt, she leans her head against him, the growl in his chest rumbling under her cheek. “Carrie could come any minute.”

  “So could you, if you let me take these things off.”

  “You’re terrible.”

  “Just following your lead.”

  A knock sounds on the bedroom door. “What are you guys doing in there?” Carrie’s singsong voice echoes from the other side.

  She almost whimpers from his hand falling away. “I told you.”

  He kisses her neck again before tugging on the fabric. “This isn’t over.”

  Stepping back, she smoothes down her dress and opens the door. Carrie looks from her to Nick. “God! Again? Please stop fucking him. It makes me so jealous. I wish I nev
er promised Nathan we would hold off until the wedding.”

  Nick’s eyebrows fly up as he laughs. “He’s the one who asked to wait?”

  “Of course! Why in the hell would I want to stop having sex?” She holds up her makeup bag. “I’m all finished except for the honey-avocado conditioner I bought last week. Do you have it?”

  “I think so. Let me check.” Shae looks back over her shoulder as she walks into the bathroom. “What did Nathan say?”

  “He was pretty upset, but we didn’t get to talk for long. A big turf war broke out, and the injured gang bangers were starting to roll in. From the background noise, it sounded pretty hectic.”

  “But he must have said yes if you packed.”

  “Not exactly. He said I should do what was safest for now, and we would talk about it tonight. I guess going to Nick’s is the safest, so here I am.”

  Nick runs his hand through his hair. “Invite him to come over after he gets off work. He can see where you’re staying, and we can talk.”

  Carrie frowns as she drops the bottle Shae hands her into her bag and zips it closed. “I can’t wait.”

  Her stomach clenches at Nick’s guilt and her friend’s worry. The three of them combined still may not be enough to persuade Nathan to let Carrie stay, or not blame Nick for the danger.

  * * * *

  As soon as Nathan walks into Nick’s house, he wraps his arms around Carrie. “Are you okay?”

  Shae’s stomach aches at his sweet gesture. Nathan works more than seventy hours a week in an adrenaline-surging environment taking care of the sick and injured. He doesn’t need the added worry of Carrie’s safety on top of his other stress.

  “Yes, I’m fine. Everything’s good.”

  He pulls back and looks at Shae, shaking his head. “What about you?”

  Shame fills her chest at the disappointment clouding his eyes, as if he really asks why she got them into this, why she’s turned into a troublemaker. It’s not a role she normally plays, a title she’s never worn. “I’m fine too. We’ve just been unpacking and getting settled.”