Souls Apart (Book 1 in the Lost Souls Trilogy)

by Anna Pescardot

  We talked for what felt like minutes but it was actually four hours. I almost jumped when I checked my watch. “My mom will be worried sick,” I said standing up and putting on my coat. “I’ll have to get going”

  He, too, stood up and put his coat back on. “I’ll walk you back, then. I’ve had a lot of fun.”

  “Me too.”

  Our faces were close again and I felt my heart beating so fast against my chest. I thought I would stop breathing. And then he kissed me. I’ve kissed quite a few guys, but this was so different. It felt as though we were meant to be together. It was like I’d never kissed anyone else and it had only been him and would always be him. I didn’t want it to end, but I thought about my poor worried Mom and so I pulled away first. I was shaking.

  “Let’s go,” he said, taking hold of my hand and leading me out of the hut.

  As we walked back I felt a strange sense of security. Usually on first dates I was a nervous wreck; wondering if we’d see each other again or if he’d let me down gently with the promise of a phone call which would never materialize; but, with Eddie it was different. I knew he felt the same way and I knew he was special. I was going to marry him. I didn’t care that I was only seventeen. When you meet the one, you just know.

  He dropped me off at the end of my street and promised to meet me again tomorrow. I felt happy as I unlocked the door. Mom had gone to bed. Turns out she hadn’t worried about me at all. Still, it was only early days with Eddie. We had a lifetime to spend together and I thought it best to take things slowly.

  -3-

  I knocked for Amber on the way to school. She was wearing the long, black gothic dress she got from the attic sale. She’d teamed it with doc martens and a long silver necklace. She’d spiked her short red hair too and I thought she looked really cool.

  “So, how did your date go?” she asked, her mouth full of gum.

  “Oh, Amb, I think I’m in love.”

  She screamed. “Agghh! That’s so great!”

  She gave me a huge hug and offered me some gum. I shook my head. I knew it wasn’t real food, but I couldn’t eat anything. I’d not slept all night either. I’d just lay there, thinking about that kiss. “I’m seeing him again tonight.”

  “I can’t wait to meet him. Have you got any photos?”

  “No. I didn’t think to take one. It’s only early days yet anyway.”

  “He sounds so cool, not like the dorks we have to put up with in class, right?”

  “He’s nothing at all like a high school guy. He’s a writer. He’s so romantic.”

  Amber grabbed hold of me. “You got it bad, gal!”

  We both giggled as we made our way to class. I didn’t know how I made it through a day of school. I was surprised I didn’t get told off at least once, for daydreaming.

  ***

  Home time couldn’t come fast enough. After saying goodbye to Amber, I rushed home and was disappointed to see Mom had made curry. Usually, I would beg her to make it, but tonight I had no appetite. Mom was already eating hers. She beckoned me to sit down. “I’ve been waiting all day to hear about your date,” she said.

  “Oh, Mom, He’s so great. I’m meeting him again tonight.”

  “Oooh, it sounds serious.”

  I took hold of my fork and started to move morsels of meat around my plate. I placed a small mouthful of chicken into my mouth. I had to eat something, I guess. “I can’t believe we’ve only just met. It’s like we’ve known each other for years.”

  Mom smiled. “I still remember the first time your dad and I met. I’d taken my car into the shop because of a flat and he came to take a look, but he ended up looking at me more than my car!” She laughed, and then sighed. “He was so cute. It’s a pity you didn’t really get to know him.”

  I felt tears welling up. “I know, Mom.” I changed the subject. “This curry is yummy, as usual.”

  She pushed her plate away, with half of it uneaten. “Oh, well. I’d best get ready for work. Late shift tonight.” She gave me a kiss on my head and I ate a few more mouthfuls myself before rushing upstairs, eager to get ready for my date.

  -4-

  We met by the big house again and this time he pulled me close and kissed me before he even spoke. “I missed you,” he said.

  “Me too. I can’t stop thinking about you.”

  “I wanted to take you somewhere special tonight. I’m glad you wore jeans like I asked.”

  I smiled. I was a little overdressed the last time we went out; I knew that now. We walked a different route this time; instead of going into the forest we took a shortcut around the back of the huge, scary mansion house. At the bottom of the hill, on the other side of the house, was a huge lake. I’d never been there before, due to being scared of going anywhere near the house. It was so peaceful. He led me to a small wooden bench at the back of the lake. It was secluded; yet, even if it hadn’t been I would have felt like we were the only two people in the world. Across from the lake was a waterfall and the noise of the rushing water helped to relax me.

  He started to touch my cheek with his fingertips and I felt shivers run down my spine, and then his lips were on mine again and it was so passionate. Things started to move too fast, though and so I pushed him away. It was a reflex action, which, judging by his expression had caught him off guard. “What’s up?” he asked.

  “I just don’t feel ready just yet; what if somebody sees us.”

  “I promise you. Nobody comes around here. I want you, Charlie. You’re all I can think about. You’re driving me crazy.”

  “I know. I feel the same, but I don’t want to ruin things. Can’t we just take things slowly?”

  His eyes seemed to grow darker again and I felt scared. “Whatever.” He stood up and walked nearer to the lake. I got up to go over to him but he turned around. “Stay away from me,” he said. He was like a different person. I didn’t know what to think or what to do. I felt my eyes getting watery.

  “I’m sorry,” I said, my voice wavering.

  He turned back to face me and then walked back to give me a hug. “No, I’m sorry,” he said, stroking my hair. “I think I should take you home now, though.”

  I nodded. He dropped me off at the top of my street again and promised he’d be in touch. He had my number but he wouldn’t give me his. I took that as a sign that he was only after one thing. How could I have been so stupid?

  -5-

  The past few days were so hard. I did badly on some important tests at school and my mom went mad. I felt so bad for letting her down, but I’ve found it so difficult to concentrate on anything else but Eddie, lately. I’ve been wandering up to the house night after night hoping to see him and I even tried to find his hut but I got lost and had to turn back round. Amber’s been great. She’s been letting me hang out at her place a lot because the atmosphere at home’s been so bad. Mom’s been working extra shifts too so I’ve hated being alone. Amber was visiting her gran tonight, though and Mom was at the diner so I went up to my room and started listening to some music. As the sound of The Smiths (a band Eddie told me about) droned out of my laptop I cried so hard I thought my heart would burst. My mom had warned me about guys like Eddie. “They only want one thing” she’d said, and “once they get what they want you won’t see them again and you’ll probably end up pregnant or with some disease”. She was right. Moms always were, but why did I feel so terrible? I really thought he was different.

  As I sobbed into my pillow I could hear a weird sound on my window. It was like tapping. I pulled back my drapes and saw Eddie. My heart lurched and I felt butterflies inside my stomach. He’d been throwing some small stones at my window to get my attention. Even though my eyes were probably red and bloodshot from crying, I ran down the stairs and threw open my front door. Eddie came rushing over and started to wipe my eyes. “Why have you been crying?” he asked.

  “Oh, it’s a few things. Nothing’s been going right for me lately.”

  “I’m sorry I haven�
�t called you. I thought you wouldn’t want to see me after the way I treated you the last time…”

  “I really wanted to see you. I’ve missed you so much.”

  He pulled me towards him and gave me another kiss which weakened my defences. “Do you want to come upstairs?” I asked.

  He smiled. “Only if it’s what you really want.”

  “It is.”

  I held out my hand and as he took hold I lead him upstairs to my room. I closed the door behind us and we fell onto the bed, engrossed in a passionate kiss. I’d never felt so close to anyone and I knew my mom would be out for ages. I almost stopped breathing when I saw him take off his shirt. He had perfectly defined muscles and there were tattoos on his arm and chest. I walked nearer to get a closer look but I couldn’t read them; they were sentences written in a foreign language I didn’t recognize. “What do the tattoos say?” I asked.

  “It’s a love poem from ancient times. I wrote it myself.”

  “Wow,” I said, as he lowered me onto the bed. This time when he started to unzip my blouse, I let him. We must have made out for two hours before I started to get really thirsty. “Would you like a soda?” I asked.

  “Sure.” His eyes were the bluest I’d ever seen them. I gave him another kiss before pulling on my jeans and going downstairs to the fridge.

  It was getting late so I told him I had school early the next day and my mom would soon be back. He understood. “I’ll see you again tomorrow,” he said, “I’ll meet you at our usual place?”

  “Ok.”

  Once he’d gone I texted Amber to tell her the good news and I fell into the best sleep I’d had in a long time.

  -6-

  Things had been getting serious between Eddie and me. We saw each other almost every night and we talked regularly about our future together. He was a romantic. As a writer he was very good at telling me how he felt. I’d read some of his work. He was a poet, mostly. I found it so strange, though, that most of his work was so dark. A lot of it was about death. He was a deep, quite serious person though. We did have a laugh sometimes, don’t get me wrong, but a lot of the time we discussed the mysteries of the Universe and other similarly serious topics. I found him interesting. I mean, a lot of the guys at school only wanted to talk about Facebook or football.

  Mom was on at me to bring him over for tea; she wanted to meet him. I didn’t know whether things were serious enough for that yet, though. He didn’t even want to knock for me for our dates. Eddie didn’t have any parents; they were both killed in a plane crash when he was a baby. His grandmother had brought him up but she died a few years back. I think this was why he was so obsessed with death. He was all alone in the world and it made me feel protective over him somehow.

  Amber also wanted to meet him but each time I’d tried to arrange it Eddie had cancelled at the last minute. I also wanted to meet the female friend of his, who let him use her kitchen but, again, he cancelled those meetings, always at the last minute. Amber was starting to think he was hiding something. She didn’t like the fact he lived in a little hut. I explained that he didn’t earn that much from his writing, if anything at all, and that he was happy; but that wasn’t good enough for her. She told me I was too young to settle for somebody with no prospects and I should be looking for someone who was able to look after me. I told her that I wasn’t looking for a sugar daddy and I was quite capable of looking after myself. I was determined to get into law school and I wouldn’t even let a relationship with Eddie stop me; if we were meant to be then we would still be together no matter what I did with my life. I hadn’t told my mom about his home, because I knew deep down, that she would side with Amber and as much as I hated myself for it; I wished he lived in an ordinary house too.

  -7-

  We were in his hut, talking about the mysteries of the Universe again, when I asked him. “Eddie, why don’t you want to meet Amber?”

  He placed his wine goblet on the floor and turned to face me. “I do want to meet her, but I’m scared, that’s all.”

  I was surprised at his response. “Why are you scared?”

  “I dated a girl once; a long time ago, and things were going so well, but then she introduced me to her friend…”

  He turned away from me and gazed towards the door. “Her friend told her I wasn’t good enough for her.”

  “Yeah, but I wouldn’t let anyone say that about you.”

  He started to raise his voice. “Look at me, Charlie. I’m twenty-four years old and I live in a hut. I’ve got no family, no proper job. I have to beg my neighbour for food. I can’t give you a proper future.”

  “I’m going to go to law school so I can buy us things. Women can be the breadwinners now. I love you.”

  He paused. It was the first time I’d actually said it. What if I’d said it too soon? What if I was wrong and he didn’t feel the same way about me?

  “Oh, Charlie. I love you too. I’m sorry.”

  He sat back down on the bean bag next to me and we started to kiss again. It felt good to know that we both felt the same way about each other. He was starting to show how vulnerable he was and I wanted to look after him. I know it might sound weird but I knew we were soul mates; we were meant to be together and I was meant to look after him.

  “So, will you agree to meet Amber?”

  “Ok.”

  ***

  It was getting cold now that it was nearing Christmas and both Amber and I were wrapped up well against the cold. I could see him standing at the top of the hill. Amber shivered. “I’m getting scared now, Charlie.”

  I looked at her and noticed she looked a little more fragile than usual. “You? Scared?”

  Amber was a horror movie freak. She’d seen all the final destinations and complained none of them were scary. I had to hide behind the sofa each time I watched them.

  “Something doesn’t feel right.” She pulled her scarf over her mouth.

  “It’s just cold tonight that’s all.”

  “No. It’s something else.” She glanced upwards. “Is that him?”

  I recognized his silhouette immediately. He stood across from Amber and gave her a smile. I could tell, though, by her expression that she wasn’t impressed.

  “You must be Amber,” he said holding out his hand.

  “That’s right. Nice to meet you, Eddie.” She took his hand and shook it.

  We both followed Eddie as he walked down to the lake. “Where are we going?” Amber asked, her face appearing much paler than usual.

  “It’s ok. We’re just gonna hang out by the lake for a while. I’ve got beers in my bag,” I said.

  She took a step back. “I think I’m just gonna go home.”

  “Amber, what’s up with you? You’ve wanted to meet him for ages.”

  “Yeah. And now that I have I think he’s seriously weird. I’m sorry, Charls.” She turned and hurried away, not once looking back. I would have to have a serious talk with her tomorrow. Eddie gazed at his feet and started rubbing his hands together. “I should’ve brought gloves,” he said blowing on his bare hands, which I could see were getting red.

  “We can go to my house if you like,” I said. “My mom’s dying to meet you.”

  He shook his head. “You said that about Amber. Don’t you get it? People don’t like me, Charls. You’re the only one who really gets me.”

  I took hold of his hands and gave them a rub. “I don’t know why you think that.”

  “She didn’t stay long, did she? She couldn’t wait to get away. And I heard what she said. If it’s any consolation I think she’s weird too.”

  We both laughed and huddled together, watching birds walk precariously across the icy lake. “So when are you going to meet my mom?” I asked.

  “I guess we’ll have to meet at some point but let’s just leave it for a little while, yeah? I don’t think I could handle another rejection tonight.”

  I gave him a kiss on the cheek and the shy look on his face made him seem so much yo
unger than his years. I wanted my mom to meet him so much. I knew she had to love him as much as I did. Why couldn’t anyone else see how perfect he was?

  -8-

  I knocked for Amber the next day but she’d already gone to school. She’d moved desks too, preferring to sit next to the class dork, Mindy, rather than in her usual place next to me. She avoided eye contact as I pulled out my chair to sit down. What was wrong with her? I caught up with her at break. “Ambs, what’s going on? Why didn’t you sit near me today?”

  “You won’t listen so there’s not much point in me saying anything.” She put her books in her locker and tried to walk past me.

  “Ambs, we’re friends. Please, tell me what’s bothering you.”

  She shrugged her shoulders. “Ok. I know you’re madly in love with him and everything but I got the worst feeling about him, Charls.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “I can’t explain it. It was like he was evil or something. It was like that time I sat in that car and I had to get out because I felt that horrible dread inside…”

  “I don’t understand why you think that, though.”

  “Trust me, Charls. He’s bad news, but I knew you wouldn’t listen so I wasn’t going to say anything.”

  “Why are you avoiding me, though? We can still be friends, can’t we? Eddie hasn’t done anything to you.”

  “I don’t know how we can be friends now. You’ll choose him over me, that’s what happens.”

  I laughed. “I’ll never put him first. You don’t have to like him as long as we can still be friends.”

  She sighed. “I’m so glad you said that, Charls. I was worried this was going to ruin our friendship.”

  “Nothing will ever come between us. We’ve been mates since we were toddlers!”

  I gave her a big hug and I sensed a weird feeling between us. It was as though it would be the last time we would be close. I pulled away slowly and noticed a strange expression on her face. It was as though she pitied me.

  “Are you ok?” I asked.

  “Yeah, sure. I guess I’m just a little worried that you’re still going to be seeing him. I don’t want anything to happen to you.”