Broken Wings: Genesis

by A. J. Rand

  “Like the angels in the Bible.” I saw where he was going with this, and wanted to move it along into territory not so familiar. A thought occurred to me while he was speaking. Why was I having such a hard time accepting the whole angel concept, when I dealt with ancient gods in the form of immortals such as Morpheus on a regular basis?

  “Yes.”

  “So they are just stories.”

  “Yes––no.” He found, as he tried to regain the focus I had interrupted.

  “They are stories with a grain of truth to them.” I offered to get him back on track.

  “Yes. Even more so than you might think.” He took his eyes from the ceiling and looked directly at me. “You can tap into the energy of the web, so you know what it is?”

  “Yes.” I nodded. “It’s the seemingly empty space, filled with energy, that surrounds the physical.”

  Ke shook his head. “Not quite. The energy web is the physical, the non-physical and everything in-between.”

  I shrugged. “Okay, I can see that.”

  His look became intent. “Do you? It is a very important point for you to understand. Physical existence isn’t just created from the web. Physical existence is the web––but separate from it.”

  I thought about it for a moment and then sighed. “Yes. I get it. I also get that this is going to be drawn out way too long.”

  His frustration was almost tangible in the air. “Mortals don’t understand the true meaning of too long.”

  I was irritated. “Okay. You brought it up. Back to that mortal thing. I thought that angels didn’t have physical form. Yet here you are, claiming to be an angel. You feel pretty solid to me. Are you like the other immortals?”

  “Angels don’t have physical form. They are pure energy tied directly into the web. But they can possess physical form.”

  I heard the emphasis and my face went blank, my voice flat. “Like demon possession.

  “It’s the same thing, except we do not force possession, we are usually invited into a human host.”

  My eyes narrowed. “But that’s not what happened in your case, is it? You forced possession and that’s what was going on when you came here. The human host was rejecting you.”

  “Yes.” He couldn’t meet my eyes.

  It took me a moment. Maybe I hadn’t had enough coffee yet. But it finally clicked.

  “I tied you to the human host on a more permanent level.” I had to laugh at the irony.

  “Yes.” He was not only unhappy––he was very grumpy about it.

  “So you are an immortal being trapped inside a mortal body. It serves you right.”

  “Yeshua––”

  I held up a hand. “No, Chaz. Not this time. All this talk about darkness and light, letting things happen naturally or forcing them to be the way you want them to. Everyone has revered the angels and cursed the demons in religions throughout the centuries. So if this guy really is an angel, then it makes the supposed good guys no better than the bad guys.”

  “You don’t know what you are talking about.”

  “Oh don’t I?” My feet came out from under me and I leaned forward in the chair, my hands gripping the armrests on either side. “I’ve been fighting the likes of you for years. You all think you’re so superior to us mortals, as you so condescendingly choose to call us. But if we are so damned inferior, why do you choose to possess our bodies, or control our actions? There must be something we have and you don’t, and it just chaps your ass.”

  Ke glared at me without speaking. Chaz kept silent alongside of him.

  “So what is it then?” I leaned back in my seat. “Is it that you can’t feel without being in physical form?” From the look on his face, I was getting warm. I paused to think about what I’d heard about angels. A thought tickled the edges of my awareness. “The Grigori.”

  Ke’s look was wary.

  “That’s it, isn’t it? The only angels that really had any direct contact with humans and lived among them were the Grigori––the Watchers sent to keep tabs on humans and protect them. But who was there to protect them from you?” Another light bulb turned on inside my head. “Oh, it’s even worse, isn’t it? You couldn’t protect yourselves from the mortals––they made you feel.”

  He looked away. There was more to it, but I had sort of snored my way through the Old Testament scriptures, much to Father David’s dismay. But there was something about––

  “The Nephilim.”

  “What about them, Yesh?” Chaz was trying to work this through his head, too.

  How did that go?

  “What was it––the sons of God seduced the daughters of man and from their union was born the Nephilim, an abomination to the heavens.” I shook my head in disbelief. “This isn’t all about sex, is it?”

  Ke laughed, but it was bitter. “Don’t be so crass. Mortals have a tendency to focus so hard on the physical that they lose sight of the bigger picture.”

  “Oh yeah?” I gave him a pointed look. “We’ll just see how your perspective changes the longer you are stuck in your new, mortal body.”

  “One way or another, I won’t be in it for long.” His voice softened. But it was a softening based on sadness, not on anger.

  “What? Planning on leaving us so soon?” I wasn’t done being irritated. “How? Suicide?”

  “Destruction of any of physical creation is against the laws of existence itself.”

  “Why should you care?” I snapped. “Weren’t the Grigori set aside from the heavens and the rest of the angels for their sins against humanity? It’s not like suicide would prevent you access from heaven, or whatever else it might be. You’re already banned from there.”

  “The Watchers didn’t sin against humanity.” Ke’s voice has regained its condescending irritability again. “We taught humanity how to save itself. We saved both humanity and the heavens from destruction. And to put things in perspective, not all of the Grigori ran around mixing their energies with the humans. Some of us abstained and worked at a higher level to stop what was happening.”

  “And just what was it that was happening?”

  “There was only one entity, above all the rest, who could create physical matter from the web. The rest of us could affect changes on the physical level, but we couldn’t create physical form from nothing but energy.”

  My look dropped into guarded mode again. “You’re talking about God.”

  “God, the Creator, or whatever else you humans use to manifest it as an entity you can wrap your minds around.”

  “Okay.”

  “When something is made physical, it becomes disconnected to the web. If it stays connected to the web, it loses physical form and reverts to being part of the web again. But there are those of us, not in physical form, which are connected to the web. You call us angels. We are a part of the overall pattern of energy, and as with any pattern, we have to follow the flows where they lead us, or else everything begins to come unraveled.”

  My brain was starting to hurt. “How about a simple translation?”

  “Angels are connected to the web. We have to follow the flows of energy. We have no choice. Humans, as physical creations, are disconnected from the web. They can tap into it, but if they stay that way for too long, they lose the part of themselves holding them to the physical.”

  I thought about some of the people I had met who connected to the metaphysical energy for whatever reason––psychics, witches, healers, and so on. If they didn’t disconnect from time to time to participate in the world around them, they started getting that “airy-fairy” quality to them––as though they were out of synch with reality. They weren’t losing touch of reality. They were actually more in touch with reality, just not at a physical level. But it did mean letting go of that part of them that made them human––the physical part.

  “Okay, I think I’m beginning to get it. But why is this important?”

  “There was one other non-physical entity that was able to create matter
from energy, but he couldn’t replicate what he had done. He didn’t create a mortal creature, he created an immortal creature of physical substance, one still connected to the web.”

  “I don’t get it––”

  “Yesh, think about it for a minute.” Chaz’s eyes were wide with understanding. “What one angel thought that he was powerful enough to challenge God, himself?”

  “Lucifer.” This was a new twist to the story I’d been taught.

  “The Morning Star.” Ke nodded. “He created a creature of energy in a physical form. The creature in turn, tried to replicate his “father’s” experiment. But you can only have one or the other. If you have form, you cannot be connected to the web. If you are connected to the web, you cannot have form.”

  “But why?” I was still missing something.

  “Free will, Yesh.” Chaz was bouncing in his seat. “If you are in the physical, you have free will. If you aren’t physical, you don’t have free will––you have to follow the flows of the pattern. But if that physical form were to be connected directly to the web, and didn’t follow the energy flows, it would most likely tear the web apart, having the free will to mess with the flows in whatever way it wanted.”

  Ke closed his eyes. “Exactly. And that’s what happened. Abaddon began to tear the pattern apart at the very source. The first thing to go in a disruption of the flows is the physical. So he was beginning to tear apart everything that had ever been created, and there was a lot of chaotic energy floating around, causing even further destruction.”

  A thought occurred to me. “But that’s what the Grigori did too, isn’t it? That’s why the Nephilim were considered to be such an abomination. The essence of the physical attributes of a human combined with the power attributes of the angels.”

  “Abaddon messed with the natural order of things and used the Grigori’s natural affinity with the physical to create those children. It wasn’t intentional on the part of the Grigori. They were unwitting pawns in Abaddon’s plan. He used them without their knowledge. There should have been no possibility of children.”

  “So it wasn’t just Lucifer and his creation that mucked things up. The Grigori had a big part in it. And it started to unravel the fabric of existence.”

  “And so the war began between the angels and the Fallen Ones.” Chaz added with a frown. “But why? Why didn’t they just band together to put a stop to the whole thing?”

  “Because there was only one safe, intermediate place between the physical realm and the ethereal access to the web. And the angels blocked the Fallen Ones, and the Grigori, from entering.”

  “The Crystal City.” I knew it without question. Did that mean I was beginning to believe this guy? I wasn’t entirely sure yet. But what he was saying rang true. And it certainly wasn’t any more bizarre than immortal Greek gods running opium dream dens, or even dream stalkers. He was leaving some things out. I knew that for certain, too.

  Ke nodded, looking back up at me again. “In the final days, just before the physical world would have been torn apart, Abaddon tried to break through one of the gateways that accessed the Crystal City.”

  “The Thirteenth Gate.”

  And Yeshua was the Guardian for that gate.” Chaz slapped his hand down on the arm of the couch.

  “In her past form, Ithane.” Ke’s eyes held mine. There was something else I wasn’t getting, and it had to do with the intensity of the look he was giving me.

  “So Yeshua was an angel?”

  “She was one of the Grigori.”

  “Okay. This is the part I don’t understand. How can a spirit with no mortality, die? And what’s more––how does it then reincarnate into a physical form? It doesn’t make sense.”

  “Ithane didn’t die.” Ke shook his head slowly. “She gave herself to the web. She fixed the breach that no one else could, by using her own essence. Everything stopped, right then and there. Together, she and I locked Abaddon into the web, but disconnected him from it.”

  “And the beast was locked into the pit for a thousand years–” Chaz mumbled.

  “There was fallout on the physical realm.” Ke continued as though the kid hadn’t spoken. “An energy wave, of both physical and metaphysical energy blanketed the earth, restoring everything to where it should be. It removed the things that didn’t belong.”

  “The Great Flood.” Chaz said with awe.

  “And it destroyed the Nephilim.” The pieces fit with what I knew from biblical texts, for the most part.

  “The pattern was restored. But as with any pattern, it eventually repeats itself. The entire angelic realm has been watching for the pattern to repeat. Some would try to stop it. Others feel we need to let it flow naturally to its conclusion.”

  “Which is what?”

  “We don’t know.”

  “And Ithane?”

  Ke looked away again. “Ithane’s signature never fully dissipated into the pattern. It steadily reformed, taking time to regroup for all these years. Those of us who reached out and felt for her knew she was still there. Then one day, she just vanished from the web.”

  “How do you know she didn’t just let go? Or maybe it was too strong for her?”

  “Because I searched outside the web and found her anyway.” He looked at me, the intensity back in his expression. “Besides, the pattern repeats. This time it is the Fallen Ones who traffic with humans and breed their own version of the Nephilim. They are demon spawn who could ultimately learn to twist the web to their own purpose.”

  It took everything I had not to turn and look at Chaz. I knew mama’d had bigger plans in store.

  “The Morning Star is active again, and we suspect he is trying to make way for Abaddon’s return. There are only two beings who could set him free. And only one of those cold stop him if he gets free on his own.”

  I stared at him, my eyes about popping out of my head. This couldn’t be happening. Then I started to laugh. It started out slow, but built to near-hysteric proportions within seconds. It was a while before I could get it back under control.

  “Look, Ke.” I took a sip of coffee and almost spat it out as another burst of laughter threatened to erupt. “You had better start looking for another solution. Even if I were this Ithane, and your story were all truth––” I tipped my head up and held out my wrists to display the bruises. “I just got my ass kicked by a dream stalker––a human being. How can you expect I’d be able to handle something as big as Lucifer? It’s ridiculous.”

  Ke was shaking his head again. I definitely liked him better unconscious. “You only need to remember––”

  “Remember what?” I slammed the cup down on the table, sloshing coffee over my hand. I shook it off with anger. “Remember how to use my energy in a way I’m not sure is possible in the first place? Remember how to be a protector for a bunch of arrogant fools you admitted to kicking the Grigori out from the higher realms? Wasn’t this Ithane supposed to have been Grigori? And she was the one who saved their asses? I’m sensing a theme with the whole angelic gratitude thing going on here. Or maybe you mean for me to remember how to be a self-sacrificing fool?”

  I started to get up from my chair. I’d had enough.

  “I’m selfish. Remember me telling you that? You may not want to believe it, but I am. I selfishly want to not die in some fight that’s not even mine.”

  “But––”

  I held up my hand. “No buts. Even if you are correct in everything you’re telling me, let me remind you of one of the principles of reincarnation. People reincarnate, not angels. They were not incarnate to begin with, but that’s another story. Even if I am, somehow, Ithane reincarnated into flesh, then I’m thinking I didn’t learn my lesson the first time. So here’s me, choosing not to make the same mistake. Look elsewhere for your savior. Ithane has left the building.”

  My words were punctuated by my leaving the two of them sitting in silent amazement while I went into my bedroom and slammed the door. I got dressed and headed out,
slamming the apartment door for good measure. I needed space and time to think.

  Chapter 13

  The chasm was right in front of me. I moved to the edge and stopped. The women of the coven were there, just as they had been the first time I had been drawn into this dreamscape. Black Wolf was absent. It didn’t make any sense. I had been stalking the dream stalker for what felt like hours.

  You could never be certain about the passage of time in the world of dreams. It was a true non-linear framework, which is why people could seldom remember their dreams come morning. They couldn’t wrap their minds around non-linear time. I reveled in it. To me, it saved in-between, wasted time. You could jump from point A to point B and cut the non-essentials out from the middle.

  This time it didn’t seem to be working. Black Wolf was playing a game of Hide and Seek. He kept leading me back to this place––his lair, for the lack of a better word. I knew that this was where he wanted me to be. Each time he circled back to this place, another member of the coven was wrapped in the web. The last time only Pietra had been absent. Not any more. She was tied into the webbing that stretched across the chasm with the rest of them.

  Where was he? Maybe it was my thoughts that conjured him. Maybe he was just ready to make his move. I don’t know, but the feeling was there, a tickle at the edges of my awareness, and I just knew. I spun around, bringing up a right cross sucker punch. It didn’t connect with his face the way I had intended. He caught it in his left hand, bringing his own right cross in to connect with my jaw.

  He let go of my fist so my weight would carry me backwards. I dropped like a rock, my back connecting to the web. I held still, very still, knowing from before that the more I struggled, the more ensnared I would become. It didn’t matter. Either way, I was trapped.

  Black Wolf stood at the edge of the chasm, at the edge of the webbing, his dark eyes triumphant with satisfaction. He stood with gloating pride over my spread-eagled body, caught in a state of immobility. But I wasn’t done yet. My body started to warm and I could feel the tingling of building energy. The only thing I saw wrong, was that I wasn’t the one calling it.