Swallow it Down

by Addison Cain

  Eugenia had barely been old enough to drink when the bombs fell. And now sperm might be meeting egg in her fallopian tube where an embryo would bounce around for days on its journey to the uterus… and a midwife was offering her hard liquor.

  Hard liquor Eugenia was absolutely not going to turn down.

  Bathroom abandoned, she found their positioning was all wrong. Joan had taken Eugenia’s seat, leaving Eugenia to sit where the captain would sit. Not that she was going to say anything, but it felt backward.

  Sitting in general felt uncomfortable.

  “Drink up.” They clicked tumblers, Joan adding, “I can get you more ice if you need it.”

  Swallowing the whole thing, blowing air from pursed lips, it took Eugenia a moment to ask what Joan’s expression made it clear they both knew was coming. “Can you get me off the boat?”

  Topping off Eugenia’s glass with another splash of vodka, the older woman curled her lip. “Yes, but I won’t. You do test my patience to no end, but that doesn’t mean I want to see you dead. And that’s all that’s out there, young lady.”

  Glancing over her shoulder out the captain’s floor-length windows to the rotting woods, Eugenia asked, “But there’s gotta be somewhere good, right?”

  “You remind me so much of my daughter. She had her head in the clouds too. Such a dreamer…” A sad smile, a wistful sigh. “Avery was in LA shooting a pilot—sure she’d be the next big thing. No one who knew her would have doubted it for a minute.”

  Vodka worked its magic. Or maybe it was that view, or the company, or the general fucked-upness her life had become. “I’m not sure what to say to that.”

  “It’s a big ship, Eugenia.”

  “Someone else phrased it in exactly those same words.”

  “Tennis and basketball courts, multiple running tracks, playgrounds, three theaters, a massive promenade—every part repurposed to maintain and protect life. The conference center is now a classroom. There’s a medical bay—”

  Eugenia raised her hand. “I get where you’re going.”

  “I don’t think you do.”

  “He forces women to have babies whether they want to or not.”

  “He does.” Joan sipped her vodka.

  “And you help him.”

  Without a blink, she said, “I do.”

  “And those little girls on board, the ones in the school or playing games with the little boys at recess, how are you going to explain it to them when they grow up and get dragged to the nightmare on Level 15? How are the boys going to feel to trade tickets to fuck their childhood sweetheart?”

  “Have you ever noticed that nature tends to correct itself. Most of the babies born since the fall are female. There is almost an even spread between genders.”

  That was mildly fascinating. “Those same little girls will one day grow up and be forced to carry babies they might not want. What if they’re gay?”

  “Insemination? There are options we can discuss—”

  “Please.” A tipsy eye roll matched Eugenia’s disgust. “Oh, and how about who gets matched with whom. What about love?”

  “You found it, and you’re already spoiling the gift, so maybe try another topic.”

  Eugenia was about to chuck that lead crystal tumbler right in Joan’s face. It sure would fuck up the woman’s well-done facelift. “I don’t know where you think you get off!”

  “You’re even lying to yourself, Eugenia.” Joan sipped from her glass. “I’ve seen the way you look at him.”

  “Yeah. Like I’m planning his murder.”

  “I’ve seen you two sneak off together.”

  “To argue.”

  Mirroring the sass, the obstinance, and the tone, Joan laid it all out. “Fine. You’re not in love. Tell yourself that if it gets you through the day. But you are good for morale. You cannot imagine the burden that man carries. The responsibility and tough decisions.”

  “He’s a sociopath.”

  “The pure fact that he loves you and announced it to the entire deck last night contradicts that statement. Sociopaths don’t feel emotion.”

  “Okay, then he’s just evil.”

  Joan didn’t even try to argue that one. “Only because he has to be.”

  “Ha. Gotcha. You agree he’s evil.” Grinning, Eugenia sipped her liquor, feeling cocky, feeling warm. “I win.” And then it sank in. “Wait, did you just say he announced that he loved me to the deck? Has he lost his mind? The women will rebel. Scarlet has it bad for the prick. So does Faith.”

  An overgrown eyebrow that would have been perfectly waxed into an arch when salons were on every corner, lifted. “Why do you think I’m drinking today?”

  “Should I anticipate more glass in my food?”

  “You’re not going to be allowed back to the party. No need to flaunt what the others can’t have.” After an extended sigh, Joan added, “And to be frank, I’m not sure he’d ever let you near the men again.”

  “So it’s to be chains and some breeding post on Level 9 after all.”

  “There’s an issue with that as well.”

  That deserved a snort. “Only one?”

  Settling back, legs crossed at the ankle, Joan sighed. “I’m fresh out of chains. Any suggestions on alternatives? Twisty ties?”

  It had to have been the vodka; there could not possibly be another reason for the pair of them to burst out laughing as if they were friends.

  Toasting, Eugenia raised her glass. “Joan, you’re creepy and dark and… a little bit funny.”

  “If you gave him reason to trust you, I bet he’d let you come and go as you please.” An amendment was added, after Joan smacked her lips, “So long as you avoid the men’s decks, for obvious reasons. Reasons we both know I don’t need to spell out.”

  “Tempting fate isn’t so wise these days, is it?” Fully aware of what reason might make him trust her, Eugenia tried not to think of the potential sperm-meets-egg moment that may or may not have been taking place inside her. “Not that he’d take a chance on me getting off the boat. We both know I’m not going to be strolling the decks anytime soon, at least without a leash and a muzzle. Did he mention to you that my reward for not burning the boat down after he left was my very own walkies?”

  Joan winked. “Woof.”

  “Ha-ha, old lady.” Only it wasn’t funny anymore.

  “I’m sure he’ll give you the nicest room, a pretty view. I’m also positive you won’t be given a balcony.”

  Grin mean, Eugenia gestured to the grandeur of the captain’s suite. “You mean I can’t stay in here? But of course that’s what you mean. That’s why you’re really here, winning me over with alcohol and fresh fruit.” Taking a bite of a juicy strawberry, mouth full, Eugenia was frank about the rest. “He’s not going to like your aspirations one bit.”

  Setting down her glass to get down to business, Joan met her eyes. “Will you help me convince him?”

  “To keep to the schedule of fucking the Level 15 ladies?” Wow. He would hate having to continue to do his duty to them just as much as they hated, in many cases, doing their duty for the crew. “You have a mean streak, Joan.”

  “Baby steps. Change of this sort can’t happen overnight just because the captain wants it to. The girls all want the same thing now. To have one man. The men will want the same. If the crew sees that he’s not faithful, the hurt will be less. Chance of another major incident will decrease.”

  “What was the incident?”

  “Faith tried to hang herself.”

  “That’s… I’m sorry.”

  “You won’t have to see it, or talk about it, or know about anything that might happen in this room. And I think we both know he’ll wash up and come right down to you.” Joan’s eyes pointed at a flat belly covered in blue cotton. “To both of you.”

  Scratching her cheek as she thought through potential scenarios, Eugenia scowled. “Assuming you abscond me to Level 9, I wouldn’t even know what he did or with whom up here. Why eve
n ask me? He could be fucking someone right now, and I’d never know.”

  “Because you have to be the one to make him do it. The captain wants to keep you in this room, and that… is a dangerous idea.”

  Objectively, the concept was fascinating—torturing him by making him fuck the others. But subjectively… “If I really loved him, my answer would be no.”

  Joan smiled. “I had expected your first objection would be germs.”

  “Then you should have considered that it would be easier for me to escape from an area of the ship I know than the heavily guarded family quarters. I don’t give a shit if he fucks every last hole on this ship. I just want off the boat.”

  The question hung between them, Joan all-business. “And what if I offered you that?”

  “I thought you said I’d die out there.”

  “You will. And that will be on you. A whole lot more people will die if there is unrest. So, even though I like you, I’ll help you commit suicide.”

  Joan was a coward who hid on a whore ship and assisted in unspeakable acts against women’s personal freedoms. What the fuck did she know about survival? Vodka and goddamn strawberries….

  Eugenia would seek out her future just fine. “Swear it to me. You swear to me that if I play your game—”

  “I’ll get you off the boat.”

  Progress was made, the knots in Eugenia’s belly loosening. “If I find out you lied, I’ll kill you. We both know I will.”

  Smiling, Joan held out her hand. “It’s a deal.”

  The shake was firm; it was promising. “Pleasure doing business with you, Joan.”

  Chapter Fourteen

  “You know this is a completely ludicrous idea!” Joan was right—the captain really was out of his gourd. Eugenia gawking at the single table set on a private deck, with candlelight and dinner waiting. “If anyone saw—”

  “Who’s going to tell them?” As if courting danger was nothing but a taste of fun, the captain pulled out her chair. “Sit. It gets a shade cooler on this side of the ship with no rock face to warm it.”

  All this said as he wrapped her in a blanket. Because, yes, it was cold.

  And the candles were flickering, and the food… it smelled a whole lot better than the slop she ate day in and day out. Usually, Eugenia only got to watch other people eat like this, unless she conned one of the crew into giving her a bite for free.

  After taking the chair across from her, he nodded at the food. “Go ahead and eat.”

  But it felt… completely against the rules she’d adjusted to. Rules that had grown comforting in their familiarity. “I’m not sure I’m hungry.”

  “Indulge me.” His grin grew, roguish and self-possessed. “Or are you going to keep shaking in your boots?”

  Brow cocked, she gave him a glare and picked up the fork. And knife.

  The man was pretty damn sure of himself to give her a knife. And she couldn’t help but laugh, looking down at the serrated edge and the polished glean of stainless steel. Using it to cut flaking fish that had no need for a knife… felt foreign. But she did, preparing a forkful covered in some kind of herb sauce.

  And took a bite.

  Understanding what he was saying loud and clear.

  He wasn’t afraid of her temper. Or that she’d tried to kill a man the day before. Or that even in that moment she watched candlelight play off the blade and considered if she could stab him before he might stop her.

  Distracted by such thoughts, Eugenia muttered, “Who’s going to shoot you in the back of the head, I wonder?”

  “Thinking of Neil?” Such manners, such suave smiles. Where was the lazy cowboy, and who was this stranger?

  “He got what he wanted. You said you’d never seen him happier. And then that was the end of him.” This person was a stranger. One she looked dead in the eyes. “No one gets to be happy in this world, on this ship… not even you, I think.”

  Daring to lean closer, to put his fingers on hers, the captain said, “I’m happy right now.”

  “And I have a knife in my hand.” And his wrist was right there. She was looking right at it.

  “One I hope you’ll use before your dinner gets cold.”

  How he could pour it on thick, knowing just how low to drop that southern drawl to make her shiver. Shaking off his touch, needing both hands, another bite of fish went to her lips.

  Yet, once her hand went down, his touch came back. “I’ve been thinking of ways to make you happy too.”

  “Oh, this should be good. Let’s hear them, cowboy.” She shook off his fingers again. “Considering the stellar job you’ve done over the last six months, I anticipate excellent dinner entertainment.”

  Playfully wounded, his eyes glittered in the dark. “We’ve had some fun here and there.”

  “True. I really enjoyed breaking your fancy dinner plates.”

  “I think that’s when I first knew I loved you.” He took a sip of water, wine conspicuously not on the table that evening. “Don’t get me wrong. There was something the moment when you stared up at me on the dock. I wanted you then like I’ve never wanted anyone. But when you had your hair tied up, humming as you scrubbed. The way your cheeks got pink to be caught. Even that cute scream. I loved you that moment to the point there was no undoing it.”

  “Men don’t talk like this.” How she wished her words would have come out less breathless.

  “I do. To you.”

  Whatever this was, she was going to put an end to it. After all, he’d given her a knife. “Aaron, you can cut the seduction routine. You already fucked me.”

  His correction was paired with a sinister smirk. “Made love.”

  “I wouldn’t know the difference. It sure felt like I was being fucked.” As in fucked over. Which brought out that very color to her cheek he commented on.

  That made him laugh.

  Shoving the rest of the fish in her mouth to make a point that she’d had enough of whatever this was, Eugenia said, “Well, this was exceedingly domestic, but I’m done. Let’s get the fucking over with so I can ice my swollen crotch and go back to sleep.”

  “No sex tonight.” He took a bite of fish, chewing slow.

  “How are you going to get me pregnant if you don’t—”

  “Fuck you?” Another slow bite of fish, the captain taking his sweet time after interrupting to answer. “There’s no rush. There’s also no doubt that I’ll get to watch your belly swell with my baby. Boy or girl, our kid will be perfect, and you will be beautiful.”

  Too much by far, she crossed her arms over her chest and got out of his reaching range. “Planning for me to whelp the next governor of Mississippi?”

  That set him laughing. “Maybe a doctor.”

  Low blow. Faking an obnoxious yawn, Eugenia said, “My vagina hurts and I hate you, so let’s wrap this up. You got duties, and I’m tired.”

  Up went that dark brow. “Duties?”

  “Pretty sure it’s your night with Faith. Don’t keep her waiting on boring doggy style or an animated blowjob while she fingers herself to the taste of your cock. Since you can’t look her in the eye, maybe show her that tongue thing.”

  The playfulness, the smoldering looks, all of it evaporated until the man she knew returned. “Who were you talking to?”

  “I’ve been talking to you, and eating fish—which was good, by the way. Since my mother raised a lady, I will even say thank you.”

  “Don’t play word games with me, Eugenia.”

  Grinning, she enjoyed the hell out of his burgeoning annoyance. “But it’s fun… and you did say you’d been thinking of ways to make me happy. Seeing that look on your face is making me pretty darn happy.”

  Dangerous anger, that was the look. The temper he tried so hard to hide behind lazy smirks and stolen touches. “The only woman who will ride this cock is you.”

  She wasn’t lying when she said she was having fun. The only fun around the ship was at his expense. “I’m flattered. I’m also not inte
rested.”

  So he doubled down. “I said I wouldn’t fuck you tonight. But that doesn’t mean that now I don’t plan to tie you down and do the tongue thing until you apologize.”

  Lady parts clenching at the thought, Eugena’s smile fell. There was no way she’d be able to stand it. “Try to tie me up and I’ll kick you right in the face.”

  The slow stand from his chair, how he leaned over their intimate table and grinned... it was demonic. “I’ll risk it.”

  The man must have been some kind of rodeo champion in his past life. Throwing her over his shoulder, he hauled her to his room. Her back hit the mattress, each limb secured while she spat curses and shrieked.

  One kick landed, square on his chest. One kick that left him laughing when he caught her flailing foot and secured it so she was spread. Spitting mad, she fought, unable to even reach the knots at her wrist—annoyed that she recognized the brand of tie and knew they must have been his.

  Accusing, and angry, and desperately irritated it took her so long to realize it, Eugenia condemned, “You were on this cruise when the bombs fell. That’s why all this personal shit is here!”

  Pleased as punch, he licked his lips. “Always so smart.”

  “And this was your room. You’ve never even been out there!”

  Lifting up her skirt as if unwrapping a present, he looked down at her pussy and hummed. “Oh, I’ve been out there. Where do you think I found my crew?”

  Before she might do more than snarl and squeal, he fell upon his dessert. The tongue thing focused on her clitoris, one exposed when he pulled back her hood and teased until she writhed. Abraded labia and aching vagina were left in peace… but her clit was tormented until she came, furious and winded.

  Wrists on fire from fighting the bonds, emotions askew as she stared at the ceiling, Eugenia understood that he tied the other girls up in the same fashion. On this bed. In this room. That the man who claimed to love her had been serviced every night for God only knew how many years.

  And that she should feel something about that.

  Lips and chin shining with her fluids, he prowled over her. Grin in place, he urged, “Say you’re sorry or I’ll do it again.”