Texas Christmas
Page 6
Gabby’s footsteps hesitated, then continued forward to match his long strides as best she could. “Christmas is a magical experience. It was when our savior was born, and we get to celebrate it in such amazing ways.”
“Such as decorating the home to the point that you exhaust yourself and nearly collapse in the middle of the night?”
“Oh, that isn’t unusual for me.” She laughed, then drew a deep breath. “The unusual part was to have a handsome man whisk me off my feet and lull me to sleep. Usually I just stumble to the room on my own just fine.”
“I—I shouldn’t have. I just wanted...you take care of everyone around you. You help the family with their business, then with their health, then with their children, then with the decorating. Who takes care of you? Who makes sure you get a break and that you feel special and loved the way you make all of them feel?”
Gabby looked at him, knowing her eyes were wide. “Is that truly how you see me?”
“Is that a bad thing?” His eyes were searching her face intently, watching her reaction to all that he had said.
“N-no. No. It’s wonderful. I never thought of myself in that way. I just do what anyone in the family would do.”
“You do far more. You do realize how much they treasure you, don’t you?”
Gabby smiled and lowered her head, once again watching her feet. “I pray for such a thing. My whole life, all I’ve wanted is to be with my family. To be surrounded by their love and able to give all of mine.”
An odd look crossed his face, and she could tell he was about to say something, but then drew himself up short. “We’re here,” he said, gesturing across the street to the clinic.
Even from where they stood, Gabby could see the place was in a terrible condition. The sign listing it as the doctor’s office was hanging loose on one side. Two of the windows at the front of the building had been broken, and inside it was obviously cluttered and chaotic.
Luke shook his head. “I shouldn’t have brought you. I didn’t realize it would still be in such bad shape.” He turned, as though to take her home, but she kept her feet firmly rooted to the spot.
“I’d say we have a lot of work to do, and not much time for you to walk me back home. Now, Doc, what do we tackle first?”
Chapter Six
He was getting too close. But she was like a flame and he felt like the moth, destined to be lured by her tempting light. Why was she still a single woman? Why hadn’t someone already claimed her as his wife?
The questions plagued him as they worked on cleaning the clinic. It appeared as if it hadn’t been used in a very long time, and all of the equipment was either rusted, broken, or outdated. He was glad he had saved up a tiny nest egg for just such a time when he would need to purchase equipment. Now would be the time.
Gabby worked alongside him at first, sweeping up the broken glass and layers of dust on the floor. The room was cold with the windows busted open, and she found a couple of spare blankets that they pinned to the walls, covering the cold draft and allowing the room to warm slightly.
Though they were quiet as they worked, they seemed in synch with each other. As soon as he began to clear items off to the side so he could work on the fireplace, she went to nearby shops and convinced them to donate some wood and kindling for them to use. He had just finished cleaning out the fireplace when she arrived with some flint and extra kindling.
Together they built the fire and Luke struck the flint only a few times and the kindling caught. They sat back and smiled as the warm flames jumped to life, dancing within the fireplace. Luke wanted to pull Gabby closer to him, to have her head rest on his shoulder as they watched the flames. But he had learned many things that morning from her grandfather, and making impetuous decisions wasn’t one of them.
Could this possibly be happening to him? He’d wished for it all of his life, but it had seemed out of his reach. To have a woman to hold, to have someone who cared for him, cared about him, and with it came an instant family large enough to make up for all the many lonely years he had struggled against...
“I hardly know you, and yet I feel as if you’ve been in my life forever. How can that be?” Gabby turned her face to look up at him, but he continued staring into the dancing flames.
After several long moments of silence, he spoke softly, keeping the intimate atmosphere they were in. “It is an odd feeling, isn’t it? I know some things about you, but it is as if my soul has known you for a very, very long time.” Should he reach for her? She was practically giving him permission.
Slowly he reached his arm around her, and she didn’t pull back. He pulled her up close against his side and he smiled to himself at her contented sigh. He turned his head to look down at her, and her lips were too tempting to pass up. He lowered his head to hers and gently pressed his lips against hers, moving them slowly and gently. At first she seemed nervous and timid, but the longer his lips gently persisted, the more willing and pliant and eager she became.
He pulled back slightly and pressed his forehead against hers, his eyes closed. “You must truly be a vixen. You draw me to you in such a way...”
“It is the same for me,” she said softly, then suddenly pulled away from him and stood. “We still have much work to do.” There was a slight waver in her voice. What had scared her away from him? What had he done?
“You are the most perplexing woman I have ever met,” he muttered, shaking his head. He had moved too quickly. The kiss had been too much, and he had frightened her. But he didn’t regret it. He could still taste her on his lips.
“What have I done to you to make you so curt with me? Only a few moments ago we were enjoying a moment in front of the fire, and now you stand away from me, as if to touch me would curse you. Why? Why do you act so odd with me?” He couldn’t resist asking her.
Tears brimmed in her eyes, but she shook her head, refusing to let them fall. “There can’t be this...this between us.” She gestured between the two of them. “You are charming, and smart, and...well, and handsome. I can’t let this happen.”
“Can’t let what happen?”
“I can’t have feelings for you. I mustn’t. My brothers...the ranch...it’s all just too much, don’t you understand?”
He placed his hands on his hips and chewed on the inside of his cheek. This woman is going to be the death of me. “No. I don’t understand. What are you scared of?”
She kept shaking her head. “Nothing. Nothing. I shouldn’t have let this happen and it is my fault. You could have any woman in the world. Don’t settle with me...you will regret it.”
Luke ran his hands through his hair, dislodging his hat. “You are the most perplexing... I don’t understand you. One moment you seem to be happy in my arms, the next, you spring away from me like I’m some sort of monster. And you’ve done nothing to adequately explain your actions.”
She turned from him and began to move some of the debris around. “We don’t have much time left in the day, and we must get your clinic clean. You’ll have patients soon, and soon, more than you expected.”
Luke slowly counted to ten. He didn’t know why he was pursuing the matter with her so hard in the first place. He didn’t want a woman to tie him down, and he knew that he couldn’t give a woman the love she needed. And if they had children...God, if he had children with Gabby, they would be the most beautiful treasures on earth. But he wouldn’t have anything to offer them. He was empty, devoid of anything that a father should have to give to his children.
If she knew the truth about his past—if she knew the things he had done, she would run from him even faster. It was for the best that she didn’t want to be with him, though his heart railed against his mind. They were good together.
Are you? Are you truly good with her? Or do you simply enjoy kissing her and touching her and the comfort of a willing woman in your arms? Aren’t you just using her to get what you want, what you need, for right now, and to hell with what happens later?
Luk
e turned his attention to cleaning up more of the mess that was to be his new clinic. He couldn’t argue with her anymore, especially when he was already arguing with himself. In silence they worked until the sun dipped lower in the sky and the fire was small, burning embers. There was still so much that needed to be done, but he knew he would come back again the next day. This time, without Gabby as a distraction.
“Well, we accomplished a lot for one day,” Gabby said with false cheerfulness in her voice, but he could tell she was hurting by the look in her eyes.
“Many thanks to you for helping me.” He nodded to her, hoping that his eyes didn’t reflect the same hurt.
“I think we’ll have it up and running within the next couple of days. But I don’t know about your living quarters. How badly is that area damaged?”
“Far worse than this. They’ll need to replace part of the roof.”
“Perhaps over the weekend the boys can help you with that project.” She smiled at him, and it was one of her genuine, kind smiles—the type that always made him smile in return. Yet, this time, he couldn’t bring himself to do so.
“Your family has already done more than enough for me. I cannot ask for anything more.”
She tilted her head and looked at him with curious eyes, eyes that he feared could see his soul. “You aren’t used to anyone helping you, are you?”
“No,” he replied. “I’m used to people running away from me.” He hadn’t meant the last comment as a barb at her, but by the look that crossed her face, he could tell she received it as such. What did she want from him? “It’s late. We should get back home.”
Home. He hadn’t had a place to call home in his entire life. And now he was referring to the Torres family home as his own. It felt like what he imagined a home would feel like. It was warm, and inviting, and there was love and laughter everywhere. Maybe being in that environment was what had put the insane thought into his mind that he could actually have something with Gabby. He was feeling content, and peaceful, and joyful...all things he had only dreamed of. And he had dreamed of a wife like Gabby. But some dreams weren’t meant to come true.
“Yes,” she said softly, her voice thick with unshed tears, and her chin trembling with the effort not to cry. “Let’s go home.”
The men had put up all of the decorations she had made, and the poinsettias had arrived. Obviously the men had no idea what to do with them as they were all piled to one side of the porch. Gabby paused outside the house, standing directly in front of it, and smiled.
With the glow of the lamplight inside the house, the decorations stood out beautifully in the semi-darkness. The cold in the air would keep the greenery fresh through Christmas, though she worried about the poinsettias. Having been grown in Mexico where it was always warmer, they could possibly struggle in their cooler Christmas.
She hadn’t realized she had been standing in front of the house for so long until Luke touched her elbow lightly to draw her attention. “You don’t plan on putting the poinsettias out today, do you?”
“Oh,” Gabby said in surprise, realizing she had been thinking of doing just that and realized how foolish she was being. “No, no, of course not. I was just deciding where I’d put them and all of the many things still left to be done.”
Luke nodded and began to turn from her before she caught his arm, turning him back to face her. “Luke...” She hesitated, trying to think of the right words to say.
“Don’t,” he said, shaking his head. “There is nothing to be said about today.” But she could see the pain in his eyes, and knew she had caused it. And she needed to fix things.
“I’m sorry for this afternoon. I have been alone for a very long time. I’ve had very protective older brothers who made certain I was never around any man. You are the first man I’ve ever kissed...the first man I’ve ever held...the first man in my life who isn’t a bossy older brother.”
“You’ve never been kissed before?” he asked, his tone incredulous.
“No. Never. And you make me feel things I’ve never felt before. You make me feel beautiful and...well, and attractive. I never thought I’d get to feel those things, and for that I am very grateful.”
“You are beautiful, Gabriella. More beautiful than you realize. And it isn’t just your outer beauty. You’ve got the biggest heart—you always give so much of yourself and expect nothing in return.” He took a step towards her, close enough that he could look down at her, and he smiled slightly as he tilted her hat on her head. “You make me dream of things I never thought possible.”
“Why? Why don’t you think it possible? You can have any woman you want. I know you are lonely now having just left London. But you can’t just settle with me. There is someone far better for you—someone elegant and sophisticated. Being the doctor for the town means you need a certain level of prestige. You won’t have that if you settle for me. Even if you settle for me for just a short while until the right person comes along.”
“Do you think so little of me? Do you think that I would toy with your affections until another woman came into my life? The heart is a delicate thing to trifle with. And I could never trifle with yours.”
She watched him closely and saw the sincerity across his face. “I know we won’t have much time together. Your living quarters will be prepared soon enough, and I’m only here until Olivia has her baby. Will you let me teach you about Christmas? Will you let me share that joy with you?”
He drew a deep breath and then a slow smile spread across his face. “Yes, Vixen. Teach me about Christmas. Show me why it is as magical as you seem to think it is.”
“Do you know why poinsettias are the Christmas flower?”
Gabby’s excitement and passion for everything Christmas was contagious, and Luke smiled as he continued arranging the poinsettias on the porch the way she instructed. “No. I’ve never even seen a poinsettia before. They are beautiful flowers.”
Smiling broadly, Gabby picked up one of the poinsettias and brought it over to him. “Do you see the cluster of petals? Look at it closely.”
Luke couldn’t resist leaning over her and smelling her hair as he looked at the flower she held out for him to see. Being with her was what he would remember about Christmas.
“It almost looks like a star, right? We believe that the poinsettia represents the star that was above Jerusalem, guiding the shepherds to baby Jesus. Can you see it?”
Luke smiled down at her. “Yes, I can see it now. It is gorgeous.”
Gabby continued smiling, then turned and went back to work positioning the poinsettias. “You’ll learn that there is a story behind everything that we do. Some of the stories are merely traditions that have been passed down over the generations from our ancestors. Others are rooted in the teachings of the church and the Bible. But every single thing we do for Christmas has a special story behind it.”
Stories. Luke had heard many stories in his life, and had a story to tell of his own one day. But not today. One day he would share with someone all that his life in London had been. And one day he would have someone embrace him for who he was, flaws and all.
“Luke? Luke? Are you all right?”
Luke snapped out of his memories and was immediately in the present with Gabby. “Apologies,” he said quickly. “My mind just wandered.”
“You were far away,” she commented. She took the last poinsettia out of his hands and placed it in the space she had saved for it. The porch now had a walkway of red leading up to the front door, where her wreath and large swag of greenery were hung. She smiled with delight, and Luke couldn’t take his eyes off her.
Is it just because it’s Christmas or does she always glow like that? he wondered as he saw her excitement at having completed the decorations. Or so he had thought.
“The luminaries are the easiest of all the things to make and you’ll love them when you see them lit. And given how cold it is, I’m thinking cutting out snowflake patterns will give it that special touch.”
/> “You want to do more decorations?”
Gabby shook her head at him. “You have no idea what you are about to experience.”
He wanted to touch her. He wanted to feel the warmth that was shining from within her. But he had to stop. At some point she would find out about the man he really was, and she’d be horrified. She deserved a man far better than he. He glanced to the sky and prayed silently. Please, Lord, finish my living quarters soon. If not, I may not be able to control myself when it comes to this woman. Lord, help me!
Chapter Seven
Luke was moving quickly, carefully folding the white paper into the perfect box shape so the snowflake was displayed boldly. Gabby smiled to herself as she continued cutting out the snowflakes, enjoying the look of pride on Luke’s face with each completed luminary. They were almost halfway complete—they only had about twenty more to go.
The house was already quiet since the family had retired to their bedrooms for the night. Olivia had even gotten up to come and see how the decorations were progressing, and both Gabby and Luke fussed over her as she stepped outside and out into the road to see the full effect.
“Oh, Gabby, you always make it so beautiful. I don’t know what I would do without you.”
Gabby had blushed deeply, then urged her back into the house where it was warm. Once they had her back in bed, Luke and Gabby examined her together—Luke checked the baby’s size and position from her belly while Gabby examined her more intimate areas.
“It’s so nice to see the two of you working together,” Olivia had said as they finished their examinations. “You make a great team.”
Luke had looked over at Gabby, a rakish smile on his face. “Yes, I suppose we do. The healer working with the doctor. Who would have ever thought?”
“I believe you have that backwards. It is more of the doctor working with the healer. Don’t forget, I’m in charge of things for Olivia.”