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Moon over Bourbon Street - a Bubba the Monster Hunter Novella

Page 10

by John G. Hartness


  “Um, I don’t mean to be a pest,” Skeeter said, actually raising his hand to get attention.

  “Yes, Mr. Jones?” Catherine asked.

  “There’s still a shitload of zombies in your front yard, and they’re gonna make it real hard to drive.”

  “Oh yes,” Catherine said. “You. Disperse them,” she commanded Ponté. He made a couple gestures, then pulled a knot of weeds out of his pocket and threw it into the fire. A sickly-sweet smell filled the room as the knot blazed to life, and in seconds all the zombies were shambling off, presumably back to their resting place.

  Skeeter and I walked out to the Hummer, put it in gear, and headed back towards the city. After a few miles of riding in silence, Skeeter cleared his throat.

  “Uh…thanks for coming to get me,” he said.

  “I don’t leave my people behind. You’re my best friend, Skeet. I couldn’t just let him zombify you, or whatever he was gonna do.”

  “Thanks. I didn’t know, you know, what with me acting all…”

  “All what? Acting all horny? Acting like you liked him? Shit, Skeeter, how many titty bars and cathouses have you pulled me out of? If we didn’t save each other from our own bad decisions, we’d have both been dead years ago.”

  “Yeah, I reckon that’s true. Like that time you insulted the bartender at that strip club in Tampa?”

  “You might have to be more specific, brother. I been to a lot of strip clubs in Tampa.”

  “The one you knocked down the whole DJ booth fighting with the bouncer and the bartender. Remember that one?”

  “Oh yeah, and you hacked the fire alarm so I could get out the back without getting shot!” I chuckled. “Those were good times.” I pointed the nose of the Hummer into the rising sun, and we told stories all the way to Cafe du Monde, where we stopped for beignets before we went to see the rest of the gang in the hospital. I’ve always found that if you go visit people in the hospital, especially if they’re in the hospital because they tried to help you out, it’s better to bring pastries.

  For information on appearances, signings, autographed copies, etc. please visit

  http://www.johnhartness.com

  @johnhartness on Twitter

  Copyright 2015 by John G. Hartness

  Moon over Bourbon Street by John G. Hartness is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

  About the Author

  John G. Hartness is a teller of tales, a righter of wrong, defender of ladies’ virtues, and some people call him Maurice, for he speaks of the pompatus of love. He is also the best-selling author of EPIC-Award-winning series The Black Knight Chronicles from Bell Bridge Books, a comedic urban fantasy series that answers the eternal question “Why aren’t there more fat vampires?” He is also the creator of the comic horror Bubba the Monster Hunter series, and the creator and co-editor of the Big Bad series of horror anthologies from Dark Oak Press and Media. 2015 has seen John launch a new dark fantasy series featuring Quncy Harker, Demon Hunter.

  In his copious free time John enjoys long walks on the beach, rescuing kittens from trees and recording new episodes of his ridiculous podcast Literate Liquors, where he pairs book reviews and alcoholic drinks in new and ludicrous ways. John is also a contributor to the Magical Words group blog. An avid Magic: the Gathering player, John is strong in his nerd-fu and has sometimes been referred to as “the Kevin Smith of Charlotte, NC.” And not just for his girth.

  For more information about appearances, signings, and other silliness, feel free to follow John on Twitter (@johnhartness), or on his website www.johnhartness.com.

  Also by John G. Hartness

  Bubba the Monster Hunter Stories

  Voodoo Children

  Ballet of Blood

  Ho-Ho-Homicide

  Tassels of Terror

  Monsters Beware - Bubba the Monster Hunter Vol. 1

  Cat Scratch Fever

  Love Stinks

  Hall & Goats

  Footloose

  Monsters Mashed - Bubba the Monster Hunter Vol. 2

  Sixteen Tons

  Family Tradition - A Bubba the Monster Hunter Prequel

  Final Countdown

  Monsters Everywhere - Bubba the Monster Hunter Vol. 3

  Scattered, Smothered and Chunked - The Complete Bubba the Monster Hunter Season 1

  UnHoly Night - A Skeeter the Monster Hunter Short Story

  Love Hurts

  Dead Man’s Hand

  She’s Got Legs

  Dead Man’s Party - Bubba the Monster Hunter Vol. 4

  Fire on the Mountain - A Beauregard the Monster Hunter Story

  Howl

  Double Trouble

  Elf off the Shelf

  Casket Case

  Bark at the Moon - Bubba the Monster Hunter Vol. 5

  Stone Cold Crazy

  High on that Mountain

  Bad Moon Rising

  Trouble in Mind - Bubba the Monster Hunter Vol. 6

  Grits, Guns & Glory - The Complete Bubba the Monster Hunter Season 2

  White Lightnin’ - A Beauregard the Monster Hunter Story

  The Black Knight Chronicles

  Volume 1 - Hard Day’s Knight

  Volume 2 - Back in Black

  Volume 3 - Knight Moves

  The Black Knight Chronicles Omnibus Edition

  Volume 4 - Paint it Black

  Volume 5 - In the Still of the Knight

  Movie Knight - A Black Knight Short Story

  Black Magic Woman - A Black Knight Short Story

  Gone Daddy Gone - A Black Knight Short Story

  Knight UnLife - Collected Black Knight Shorts

  Quincy Harker, Demon Hunter

  Raising Hell

  Straight to Hell

  Hell on Heels

  Co-Edited with Emily Lavin Leverett

  The Big Bad: An Anthology of Evil

  The Big Bad 2

  Other Work

  Queen of Kats: Book I - Betrayal

  From the Stone

  Headshot

  Balance - Tales of Alternate Reality

  Genesis - Return to Eden Book 1

  The Chosen

  Returning the Favor and other slices of life

  Red Dirt Boy

  The Christmas Lights

 

 

 


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