There's no Love on Wall Street

by Ira Trivedi

  ‘I’ll just have to tell you the way it is,’ he sighed. ‘You’re a smart girl, I’m sure you’ll get it. Basically, I did a couple of trades last year, and salman … you know Salman, right …?’

  ‘Yeah, he interviewed me. He moved to the London office recently.’

  ‘Yup, that’s our man. So Salman assisted me on a couple of trades, and we thought it was a done deal, but the company went bust with all this sub-prime crap, and we … basically I … got fucked. Salman buggered off to London,’ he said with contempt. ‘At least the slime did one thing right … he got you in,’ he mumbled under his breath.

  ‘What do you mean?’

  ‘It’s obvious isn’t it? I arranged it so that Salman would interview you, because he could get you the job.’

  ‘So this was a set-up?’ I asked, stunned.

  ‘Isn’t that what you wanted, Riya? You were desperate to get the job, you wanted me to help you and I did.’ On seeing my crestfallen face, he said gently, ‘I’m sorry, sweetie. You were so keen on being a banker, and I wanted to keep my promise to you.’ He reached across the table to hold my hand, but I quickly withdrew it.

  ‘Sachin, how could you?’ I said, feeling a rush of anger.

  ‘How could I what?’

  ‘Why didn’t you tell me before that you’d set it all up?’

  ‘What was the point? Listen sweetie, this is the way the Street operates, you have to play the game if you want to be here. I mean, you got what you wanted. What’s the problem?’

  ‘I … I just thought I’d done it myself,’ I said, feeling a mixture of anger, sadness and hopelessness.

  ‘There’s no myself here. It’s only myself when you get fucked. ‘When you win, it’s the team. When you lose, you lose alone,’ he said with a sneer. ‘Babe,’ he said a few minutes later. ‘I need a favour.’

  The urgency in his tone made me look up from the now-cold and untouched fish. I wondered what the incompetent intern could possibly do for her fallen angel. My last hope on Wall Street had turned out to be a dud.

  ‘Listen carefully,’ he said lowering his voice to a whisper and leaning forward. ‘I have information that a certain company is going to buy back their paper. If I know exactly when this is going to happen, I could front run the deal and square off all my losses. I could save my ass and, well, I could try to get you an offer.’

  He looked at me intently and I wondered what he was going to ask me to do. I feared what was coming next.

  ‘Riya, I need you to get me a document, the confidential information memorandum of a deal called Timebom.’

  ‘Uh … I’m not su—’

  ‘It’s really not such a big deal,’ he said, cutting me off. ‘It will be on your Q drive, the common storage folders where you access deal info from.’

  ‘Of course I know the Q drive,’ I replied, ‘but can’t you ask your secretary to call and get it?’

  ‘You see, there is something called a Chinese wall in investment banks. I don’t want to bother your pretty little head by going into too much detail; basically a Chinese wall separates different groups in the bank so they can’t share information. But people don’t care about it much, really. You understand?’ He was beginning to get irritated.

  ‘I’m … um … not sure.’

  ‘It’s really just a small little thing, nothing serious, just a document or two which I need you to print out and give me.’

  ‘Are you sure you can’t just call Sally, or there is this Indian analyst amit, and ask for the info?’ Wouldn’t that be better? I’m sure they could email it to you.’

  ‘Riya!’ he said harshly. ‘Aren’t you listening? This is info that only the CDO group has access to and we can’t get it because of the Chinese wall bullshit. I don’t want to get into details because it’s too complicated, but I’m telling you, it’s not such a big deal. People circumvent the damned walls all the time. All you have to do is to open the folder, print out the document and give it to me! How tough is that!’ he said with a laugh though I could see that he was beginning to get frustrated.

  ‘Wait a second, Sachin. Let me get this clear. You want me to get you confidential information which you otherwise do not have access to? That’s illegal!’

  He took a deep breath. ‘Yes, kind of. Riya, listen to me,’ he said and took my hand in both of his. ‘If you think about it from that perspective then it was illegal for me to get you this internship, and it would be illegal for me to help you get your offer. A lot of things are illegal in this world but we do what have to. I promise you, no one will ever find out; you’re just an intern, and also it’s really not such a big deal. We could’ve got this information from anywhere; it’s just easiest when it comes from you.’ He paused. ‘And don’t forget Riya, I got you this job. You kinda owe me.’

  That kinda pissed me off. ‘You helped, Sachin, but I got it myself.’

  He scoffed, ‘Whatever, delude yourself, if that’s what you think.’ He took a deep breath and continued gently, ‘Riya, you’re one of the few people I trust here. I helped you out because you’re a great girl with a lot of potential. I really need you right now. I’ll be fucked if I don’t get that CIM. I’ll lose my job, my visa, my apartment … everything,’ he said shaking his head. ‘Babe, you have to help me. once I get this deal sorted out, I’ll be able to get you an offer, just like I got you this internship.’

  The frantic look in his eyes scared me. ‘Sachin … I … I’m not sure. I’ll have to think about it,’ I said softly, feeling really bad for him and alarmed by what he wanted me to do.

  ‘It’s really not that hard, babe. It’s just a bloody printout, that’s all. You don’t have to think so hard. remember, I scratch your back, you scratch mine—that’s the way it works on the street, you’ll understand soon enough.’ He glanced at his watch. ‘Shit, it’s getting late, we better get going.’ He asked for the cheque and before we got up, handed me a small piece of paper. ‘This is the name of the deal and the stuff that I need. Just don’t send me any emails or whatever from your office email. Call me on my cell if you need anything, or SMS, or worst case scenario, my personal email.’

  ‘Okay,’ I said hesitantly and took the piece of paper from him.

  Before I left he kissed me on the cheek and whispered in my ear, ‘You’re my girl, I know you’ll come through.’

  I walked back to the office in a tizzy, trying to digest everything that had transpired in the past hour. I tried to organize it in my head: Sachin had set it up with Salman so that I would get the job. Sachin had screwed up and was about to lose his job unless I helped him by becoming part of some shady insider information deal to save his ass and, given the current situation, probably mine as well. If I happened to get caught helping him, I’d face the unimaginable wrath of the American legal system. I was a stickler for the rules (Thanks, Parents.) and I didn’t know how I could possibly do this.

  I did owe Sachin, he did get me the job and he could help me get the offer. But, if things went wrong … I shuddered thinking about the risk I would be taking. My investment-banking dreams would go down the tube. I looked at my watch. Crap. It was 1.45 p.m. I was supposed to have been back at work half an hour ago. I had a stack of pitch books to work on, three documents to edit, and I had to be on a conference call in fifteen minutes. I couldn’t think about this right now, I was drowning in Pitch Book Hell at the moment. I would give it some thought, and check out this file and then decide what to do. It was an interesting proposition, and Sachin and the deal weren’t going anywhere for a while.

  Deal Breaker

  It had been the two worst days of my life. I had been in the office for over twenty hours a day.

  My life was deal-closing madness. I sat in the same chair for hours on end, despising the BlackBerry that I had previously thought was so cool. I had been given strict instructions by Sally to answer the CrackBerry at all times. I had to be available at all hours to do menial labour—picking up books from the production department, pestering c
ranky lawyers to send documents, reminding frustrated bankers to sign papers, and nagging rating agencies to submit information. There was no respite, I was on call even when I went to pee.

  Before I went to bed at night, I set my BlackBerry on the highest volume and held it to my heart as I fell asleep. And more often than not, my precious hours of sleep were plagued with nightmares in which I would miss Sally’s call and then she, and Sean and Amit, would appear in my room, evil smiles on their faces and axes in their hands, and attack me while I lay in bed screaming, clutching my BlackBerry.

  It was 2 a.m. and I was waiting at my desk for some documents. To bide time I went on eBay and bought a used Prada handbag, some underwear from Victoria’s Secret and a shirt from J. Crew. This is what I did to keep my endorphin levels from sinking—shop online compulsively and check to see the status of my bank account where the paycheques were piling up. I didn’t pay for food or transportation and I spent most of my time in office, so my savings were substantial. Purchasing things for the sheer enjoyment of spending that money and holding something shiny and new was what kept me going through those grim days. I heard my cellphone beep.

  HEY SWEET STUFF NE NEWS 4 ME? SACHIN.

  In the midst of closing frenzy his proposition had been pushed to the back of my mind. I looked around me: the analyst pen was unusually deserted. Amit and Sean had left for the day and Kurls was busy at work. I fished out my wallet from my tote bag and found the piece of paper Sachin had given me. Timebom, Confidential Information Memorandum. I surreptitiously went into the shared Q drive, my heart beating fast and scrolled down to T … Timebom. Score. I did a quick check to make sure no one was watching, and clicked on the folder.

  PLEASE ENTER PASSWORD

  Damn! It was password protected and … it belonged to Sally. If I wanted access to that file I would somehow have to get the code from her. Impossible. I remembered the desperate look on Sachin’s face at lunch that day … I felt terrible for him. He had gone out of his way to help me, and he had hardly even known me then. Wasn’t it my duty to help him? There had to be some way to get my hands on those documents. If I could get them, not only would Sachin’s job be salvaged but perhaps I could lock down my offer too. The idea of getting a full-time offer was very tempting, and I was beginning to wonder what, if anything, I could do about it.

  Of Strip Clubs and Steakhouses

  1 a.m. Another long day, but I had no right to complain. Compared to the craziness of the last few days, things had been fairly relaxed since the deal I was working on with Sally, Amit and Sean had finally closed. I should have left by now since I had no real work to do, but I couldn’t because Kurls was still here and I didn’t want to leave before him. For the past few hours I had been staring inanely at my computer, going through the CDO handbook that I had already been through—unsuccessfully—a hundred times.

  My worst fears about Kurls’s entry into our CDO coterie had come true. He was a brown-nosing, over-eager, earnest brat, and no matter how hard I tried I could not compete with him. He was an Excel maniac; he could work using just the keyboard, and a file that I would need at least two hours to finish, sans perfection, he could deliver in twenty minutes, tout complete. The most disconcerting thing was that he was for real; he genuinely liked the CDO business.

  An IM from Ivana caught my eye.

  Rjain: Yo babe, wassup?

  Idzervite: Ntn much, slaving as usual

  Rjain: Hows work?

  Idzervite: oK I guess …

  Rjain: Uh huh … god I am sooo bored right now and so wanna go home!

  Idzervite: Y don’t u?

  Rjain: It’s this idiotic intern, I don’t want to leave before him, it’ll make me look like a slacker!!!

  Idzervite: just leave if u have nothing to do

  Rjain: ugh its so annoying! Freak it … I’m just going to leave in a few … Come with? We can grab a drink on the way

  Idzervite: not sure if I can leave … ill call u

  Rjain: okay, ttyl

  ‘Hey Ker-Lih?’

  ‘Yes Riya?’

  ‘What time do you think you are going to be done?’

  ‘Not sure.’

  ‘Well, if you want to leave, we could take a cab together, I’ll expense it.’

  ‘I’ll be a while. This project has just hit a very exciting juncture.’

  A pang of jealousy hit me. This was supposed to have been my project. I got up to leave before any more negative thoughts entered my head. As I was getting up to leave my phone rang. Ivana.

  ‘Hey, what’s up?’

  ‘Just outside the building, smoking a cigarette,’ she said in a tired voice.

  ‘When did you start smoking?’ I asked, surprised.

  ‘Not so long ago,’ she said blandly. ‘One of our MDs is a smoker so I figured it would be a good way to network. We take cigarette breaks together.’

  ‘Um, okay, if you say so.’

  ‘Where are you?’ she asked.

  ‘I’m just going to leave work. See you in a few outside your building?’

  ‘Cool.’

  Ivana worked in a different building, and I had to walk across two blocks to get there. I went through the big revolving doors and noticed a familiar face revolve around in the opposite direction. Jonathan. My heart skipped a beat. I went around in the revolving doors till I was back inside the building. He was just a few metres away. ‘Jonathan!’ I called out. He didn’t turn around. I walked quickly till I reached him, and touched his shoulder. He turned around with a surprised look on his face. ‘Hey!’

  ‘Hi,’ I said shyly. We just stood there, a few inches separating us in the big empty lobby. Hugging him would be inappropriate, and a handshake was far too formal.

  ‘What’s up, Intern, what are you doing here so late?’

  ‘Just some work. What’s up with you? You look, uh …’

  He needed to shave and his eyes were bloodshot. His short hair was dishevelled and his faded blue shirt was crumpled.

  ‘Yeah, I know, I don’t look so hot,’ he said, with an embarrassed tone, running his hand through his hair and looking away. ‘I just got off a flight from London.’

  ‘Were you there for work?’

  ‘Yeah, road-show. The usual.’

  ‘That’s cool. Was it all work, or did you get to have some fun?’

  ‘Yeah, we had a couple of dinners and the Goldstein guys there organized this club called Tramp. These guys were out of control.’

  ‘Really?’

  ‘Yeah, we ordered six bottles, and there were seven of us; not a drop of alcohol was left by the end of the night.’

  I laughed, and then asked curiously, ‘So … just a bunch of guys?’

  ‘Yeah … hot women everywhere, though.’

  ‘I mean, were any of the clients women?’

  He looked at me as if I was kidding. ‘It was a boy’s night out.’

  ‘Hmm, so what if, say, I had to entertain clients?’

  ‘Manis and pedis?’ he said with a wink, and we both smiled. ‘Most of the entertaining revolves around strip clubs, and steakhouses. Most of these guys are married and I met all their wives at dinner, really pretty and nice women. At the club these guys were asking me to introduce them to these random girls that were, like, sixteen.’

  ‘That’s crazy!’ I exclaimed.

  Jonathan nodded. ‘The weekend was far more tiring than I thought it would be.’

  Just then, my phone rang and I fumbled to get it. ‘All right! It seems like you have things to do and I better take care of this stuff and get home. See ya later, Intern.’

  I watched him as he walked away. Why did I want him to stay and talk to me so desperately? What was it about him that had me crushing on him like this? I absolutely had to find a way to hang out with this guy.

  I found Ivana waiting underneath her building.

  ‘Riya … what took you so long? I’ve been waiting for fifteen minutes,’ she said clearly annoyed.

  ‘I’m so sorry. I
just bumped into someone. I haven’t seen you in the longest time, how are you?’ I said giving her a hug.

  Ivana looked … a bit lumpy. She was wearing a pair of pants that were a bit too short for her and a wrinkled shirt. Her hair was limp and greasy and she reeked of cigarette smoke. She had gained weight, her usually perfectly tanned skin was pale and she had dark circles underneath her eyes. The Ivana that I remembered had been perfectly turned out. ‘What happened to you babe, you look really … tired?’

  ‘I haven’t been to the gym or the tanning salon in weeks. Look at my nails, they’re a disaster.’ She showed me fingers with short uneven nails and chipped nail polish. I hated to tell her that her nails were the least of her worries. ‘Its that SeamlessWeb, it’s the bane of my existence, I order so much everyday.’

  ‘I know, thirty bucks can get you a lot of food. I order the most expensive thing, and I still have money left over.’

  Ivana shook her head and pinched her belly. ‘ALL thanks to SeamlessWeb. I order lunch and dinner, and I keep the lunch in the fridge for the next day. Sometimes I order breakfast as well.’

  ‘That’s pretty smart, I’d never thought of that …’

  ‘Well if you want to end up like this,’ she said, pointing to her tummy again, ‘then do it, otherwise skip lunch is what I say.’

  Poor Ivana. The Financial Institutions Group was supposed to be one of the toughest groups in the bank. Everything wanted to work there because they made so much money, but well, they worked you for the money.

  We walked over to the twenty-four-hour deli around the corner to load up on caffeine and sugar. I hadn’t planned on talking about it to anyone, especially not Ivana, who had a big mouth, but I was itching to tell someone about my new crush. It was probably the caffeine and the adrenalin rush of seeing him that made me tell her.

  She squealed with delight. ‘Oooo … vice president! That means that you’re all set with your offer, huh?’

  I was surprised by her response and a little irritated. ‘Um, this has nothing to do with my offer. It’s just a little crush. Besides, I doubt he would be interested in me. I’m just a silly intern.’