He wondered whether he’d fallen asleep, passed out on top of her, as he felt Candy’s hand slide up and down his back lightly, tracing small circles over and over. He was still inside her, where he loved to be, but he couldn’t explain this change in him. He couldn’t have enough of her tonight. She was amazing, his wife, sexy as all hell. She said nothing as she lay there quietly with him, just staying in the moment.
He finally lifted his head and glanced down at her quiet beauty, her dark toffee-colored eyes, her silky long dark hair spread over the pillow, and her lips, which he loved to sample over and over. He pressed a tender kiss there, holding it for a moment before pulling out and moving beside her, lying on his side so he could look over at her, nose to nose, so close he could touch her lips with his. She just watched him, not saying a word. This was the love and passion that burned inside her for him, which she couldn’t hide.
“Was I too rough?” He touched her face with the back of his hand as if he needed to hold on to her. He wondered at times where her head went, what she was thinking, and he found himself remembering the journal on the writing desk in the corner of their bedroom, its dark blue cover. She left it sitting there all day, every day, and not once had he opened it.
She just stared at him as a slow smile touched her lips. It was subtle, and he waited until it lit up her eyes. Then he knew she was okay.
“No, but wow. What got into you? You were insatiable last night. I love making love with you, but you haven’t seemed too interested as of late.”
Did she have any idea what she did to him? Maybe it was because of this feeling he’d had for so long that he wasn’t good enough for her. “I don’t know,” he said. “It felt as if you gave something back to me. Can’t explain it.”
She didn’t say anything, but the way she watched him again was as if she knew. She rolled on her side, the sheet falling away, showing off her magnificent breasts—the full creaminess and roundness he loved to explore, to touch, to taste. She was nose to nose, sharing his pillow as she stared at him and then reached for his hand, holding it. “I’m glad. I wasn’t sure what I could do for you, but I’m happy to have you back.”
The way she said it, he started to wonder about a lot of things, his moodiness and brooding and floundering. Neil was all about business, always had been. “I can’t explain it, but you know that excitement you have when you’re doing something you love, something that excites you, stirs your blood, and fills you with such joy? When you gave me the idea last night, I just couldn’t stop it from flowing.” He threw back the covers and slipped out of bed naked, watching the easy smile that lit up his wife’s face as she watched him stride around. Her hands were tucked under her cheek as she lay curled up on her side. The way she watched him made him feel so good. This was the first time she didn’t have that deer-in-the-headlights look at any mention of his resort, his million-dollar deals, or being part of something with him that was way out of her comfort zone. Maybe she was ready.
“You know,” he said, “it would be fantastic first if we could fly back to Cancun, meet with the builder. There was a financier I was considering partnering with to expand the resort to be part of a worldwide diamond chain.” He was on a roll, and it took him a second to realize Candy had looked away and was now sitting up. Their king-size bed with its intricate post design was the centerpiece of the room, except for the fact that his wife, sitting in the middle of that magnificent bed, appeared to be unsettled now. The change was enough to make him sift through his head. He’d been thinking out loud about his plans and how excited he was, but maybe something had spooked her.
“Whoa, seriously, Candy, what did I just do?” He was worried as he smoothed back his hair, his hands resting on the side of his head now. She was pulling away.
She gave her head a shake, pasted a smile to her face, and hesitated only a second before slipping out of bed and walking toward him with her gorgeous, sexy body. The scar that had left her unable to have children had faded now. She touched him, and there was a mist in her eyes as she looked up at him. “I just never realized how much I was holding you back—and for that I’m truly sorry.”
Chapter 9
She pressed her hand to her chest over the soft satin of her lavender housecoat, wondering whether the shock on her face resembled the jolt that was zinging through her as she took in her husband and his cleanly shaven face. He was dressed in dark dress pants, a leather belt, and a navy dress shirt. The only thing missing was a tie. He smiled as he walked right up to her and kissed her open mouth, as she’d been gawking. Her hand slid up to her throat before falling to her side.
“I can see you’re a little taken aback.” He was standing over her, looking down, and he winked in that flirty way of his that she hadn’t seen in a long time.
No, the Neil she’d seen over the past year was one who had taken to growing his hair, refusing to shave, and dressing casually as if he’d decided to check himself out on a permanent vacation.
“You like?” he said. He’d even thrown on that cologne she loved, which wasn’t overpowering but had her wanting to run her hands over his face and then link them around his neck, reaching up and breathing in the clean, spicy, intoxicating scent that had always rattled her.
“Don’t know what to say, Neil,” she said. What she did do was giggle as she touched her mouth, hearing Michael and Cat behind her clatter at the table, eating cereal and calling out for Daddy. Of course, Neil bent over and kissed each of them until they were laughing. She wondered for a moment whether he’d be upset with their dirty hands on his clean shirt. She couldn’t remember a time he’d been around them dressed so…nice.
He pulled away before they could run milk-soaked hands over him. “I have a meeting with my banker to go plead for money, and then I have some ideas I wanted to talk to you about.”
She couldn’t remember him ever including her like he was, and for a moment she realized one of the concerns she’d had was that he’d drift back to the old Neil, who just went ahead and steamrolled over her, leaving her without a clue as to what was going on.
He ran his thumb over the crease above her nose, between her eyebrows. “Hey, I promised you before that I’d never keep you in the dark again. I’m just sifting some ideas around and want to make sure you’re on board before we do anything.” He leaned in and kissed her again.
“Well, what about the banker?” she asked, and he sighed.
“For one, we need a line of credit to keep going so I can keep the bills paid until I get a viable business income coming in. I shouldn’t have drained us like I did, but…”
“You weren’t thinking clearly, but helping Andy is what you should have done. I can’t fault you for that.”
He had a way of giving all of himself to her that he’d never had before. It was in a look, a touch, or saying nothing at all. “I love you. You know that, right?” he said again with a flicker of worry.
“I know. That’s been the one thing I’ve never questioned.” She reached up and slipped her hand over the smooth skin of his cheek. “I’m going to miss my rough-around-the-edges Neil, but I do like this one, too. So I need to ask before you go: Do any of the ideas have us going back to Cancun, back to the estate, living back with your mom and dad?”
All the happiness he’d had moments before changed to something resembling disillusionment.
“Oh, Neil, this thing with your mom…why can’t you see it the way I do?”
He made a sound of frustration as he stepped away, becoming distracted, letting her know he didn’t want to consider her side, but she really looked at him, waiting him out until he glanced back at her.
“I don’t know, Candy. I bought this house, this place here for us. I still own the estate with Dad. I can’t see it your way, I’m sorry. This is my mom, who I had an image of in my head for so long. She and Dad were perfect. They were my inspiration for a family, all that dedication and love, and to find out they were just like everyone else, flawed, not the picture-perfect
parents I believed they were…I’m having a hard time coming to terms with any of it, let alone understanding it. Us, this family…” He gestured with enough force that she knew he was digging in, standing his ground. “We’re not cheaters. That was pounded into us by my parents, by my dad, only for me to learn that my mom is a hypocrite.”
She was taken aback by the venom and judgement. She didn’t know what to say to get him to understand that it wasn’t all that cut and dried. Everything wasn’t always that simple. Maybe that was what this came down to—that her husband, who’d controlled everything about their relationship and his business until he’d nearly destroyed them, was losing control.
“Neil, you’re so wrong. If you recall, what you did with Maria was cheating, in a way, much like what your dad did with that neighbor woman, giving his attention to her, spending time with her.”
His eyes flashed with an anger she hadn’t seen in a long time. “And you’re like my mom, with that doctor who befriended you in Cancun. How much more would it have taken before he had you in his bed? Is that what you’re saying?”
His words were like a slap in the face. Maybe he realized he’d gone too far, as he stepped away, reached for his keys, and left.
Chapter 10
She lifted the dirt with the blade of the shovel and then pulled out the weeds to dump them into the wheelbarrow at the edge of the driveway. She really loved their landscaping, with mature yellow and pink rosebushes, a peach tree, a wisteria, and small bushes she didn’t know the name of. They’d become overgrown in such a short time, and with the new buds of spring starting, this was the time to cut them back. She was drawn into the colors, wondering what else she could plant in front. She’d love to pick up some marigolds, impatiens, asters, daisies. She loved daisies. Then there were all the colors of annuals. They were so impractical, and she’d never really lived in a place that could have any—nor had she had the money to toss away on them. Then, they didn’t anymore, as she’d just found out.
She couldn’t help thinking of Neil’s mom and her spectacular gardens. She’d loved the fragrant tropical flowers down in Cancun. It was a stunning place, the estate, but it was a place that had never been hers and never could be.
This was the first place that was just theirs, hers and Neil’s, where she could create something that belonged to just them, making changes, adding, enhancing. She couldn’t have done that at the estate down south. She jammed the shovel in the dirt, glancing over again at Michael, who had his own plastic shovel, digging up the dirt in a planter. He was making a mess but having such fun. Cat was on the bicycle Neil had bought her with training wheels, riding around on the front driveway. She was wearing her pink helmet with ladybugs.
She heard the gate open, and for a minute she blinked, wondering who was there, as Neil had only been gone about half an hour, if that. She watched the dark truck pull in, Brad’s truck, and she only had a moment to wonder who was behind the wheel when she spotted Brad, who honked, maybe to catch Cat’s attention. She put her foot down and stopped, pulling over to the side, looking up, straddling her bike with both sneakered feet on the ground.
“Hi, there.” Brad came around the truck and touched the top of Cat’s helmet. Leaning down, he said something to her that Candy couldn’t make out, but Cat was smiling up at her uncle before she started to pedal again.
Brad was still smiling as he glanced her way, dressed as he always was, in blue jeans, a blue checked shirt with the sleeves rolled up, and his belt with a silver buckle. As always, he looked so good, and he appeared to take in everything and everyone in that moment—a guy who took care of everything. “Neil here?” he asked, stepping closer, taking in the goofy grin on Michael’s face as he held on to the large ceramic pot, digging in the dirt and tossing it on the ground.
“No, he went out to the bank,” Candy said, leaning on her shovel, reaching up and wiping back the strand of hair that had come loose from the messy bun she’d pinned her long hair up in.
“Everything okay?” He stepped closer, looking at her with the big-brother look he’d mastered. Then, he’d always been someone for Candy to lean on. Even though he was Neil’s brother, she knew he would never take sides. He’d be there for her, as well. It meant more to her than she could explain to anyone, but it bothered Neil, too.
She shrugged. “We kind of had a fight.” Why had she needed to say something?
Brad crossed his arms, looking down at her. “Do you want to talk about it?”
She smiled over at her brother-in-law. At times, she envied Emily for having a man like Brad, but they were so suited for each other. She took in how broad his shoulders were. He was the one everyone leaned on, though they all came together to help one another out. Brad was different, however. He was the one who seemed to keep the family together with his role of big brother. They looked up to him. Candy looked up to him, though she loved Neil deeply.
“Neil shaved off that beard he started, came down dressed for business. I was starting to wonder where the old Neil had disappeared to. He doesn’t want to walk away from the resort, the business. I know he agreed to for me, for us to have a new start, but it wasn’t entirely fair for me to think he could be happy up here, living a simple life. He’s not happy, as you can tell. He’s going through the motions.”
Brad gave her an odd look she wasn’t sure she understood.
She shrugged. “Neil isn’t made the same as you and Jed. Even Andy is more settled. Neil needs more. I just hadn’t realized how much.”
“Neil always was the one with the ideas, and by the time any of us had a chance to think about something, Neil was already off implementing it.” Brad was shaking his head. “He would line up backers and have everyone in place to start the work while the rest of us were still standing there, feeling at times as if he’d just yanked the rug out from under us. He was the idea guy, never one to get his hands dirty—other than working with wood. He played around with carpentry for a while. It was always something that inspired him, but not enough, I guess. He starts things, as you can see, and he does pitch in, but physical labor doesn’t drive him as it does me, Jed, and Dad. Even Andy is happy getting his hands dirty and finishing what he’s started. Neil’s the one who always wanted to own the world, to look for something bigger,” Brad said, and Candy had to agree. “But what about you, Candy? This can’t all be about Neil. I thought you didn’t want Cancun, the resort, that life?”
She had to look up at the concern in his expression.
“Neil loves being the center of attention, always has,” Brad said. “He’s comfortable and thrives in the wheelin’ and dealin’ life. I remember a time it scared the hell out of you. Do you think you could go back with Neil and be part of that?”
It really was a great question, but the fact was she knew she couldn’t, even considering it was something Neil did all the time. That kind of thing would have Candy slowly going out of her mind. She liked the quiet, her family, her home, and her horse and donkey. She didn’t know how to schmooze the kinds of people Neil needed to be in business with, and she didn’t want to learn. Her stomach ached thinking about it. “I think you already know the answer to that, but I can’t ask Neil to give everything up for me and be miserable.”
“So what are you going to do?” he said, watching her.
She wished he’d offer some words of wisdom, because right now she didn’t see a happy outcome for either her or Neil. “I don’t know, Brad. I don’t want to see Neil unhappy or disillusioned as he is now. He came alive last night for the first time since I could remember, excited in a way he hasn’t been in a long time. I can’t take that from him. I can’t ask him again to give it up. He’s not happy, even though he told me he could be. Look at everything.” She gestured to the yard, the house. “He gets an idea, spends a pile of money, and never finishes anything—the deck, the patio… The barbecue is still boxed, and now he’s talking about building Cat an outdoor play center. The money he’s tossing away is money we don’t have.”<
br />
Brad was nodding, looking down at Michael, who was now shoving a handful of dirt in his mouth. “Michael, don’t eat that!” Brad said, laughing as he reached down and wiped the dirt off Michael’s tongue before lifting him in his arms. “Do you want me to talk to Neil?” he asked. “I could sit him down and help him get his head on straight.”
“I would, but I think I need to work this out with him. What I would prefer is if you talked to him about your mom.”
Brad appeared confused.
“Part of our fight. He told me you know what happened in your parents’ past, your mom’s indiscretion.” For a moment, she wondered whether she should have let it go.
Brad looked away, taking a breath as if this was something he didn’t want to think about, let alone talk about.
“I’m hoping you’ll help Neil understand that what happened is in the past. Your mom is still your mom. He’s not very happy with her, and I’m afraid your mom may be right.” This time, she had Brad’s attention. “Your mom told me that Neil would never understand. She never wanted any of you to know, and I know what it took from her to share it with me.”
Before Brad could answer, the electronic gate opened, and Neil pulled in, driving their white SUV. When she looked up at Brad, she realized maybe he couldn’t understand, either.
Chapter 11
Pulling in and finding his big brother speaking with his wife didn’t make Neil very happy. He stepped out of his SUV and spotted Cat, who climbed off her bike and ran to him in her slow, awkward gait, stumbling just before she reached him, but Neil was ready and caught her before she could fall.
He carried her over and used that few seconds to try to dial back his irritation. He patted Cat’s leg, holding her tight. “Brad, didn’t know you were coming over.” He didn’t look over at his wife but could see that her face was flushed from awkwardness, which could have been from their fight earlier. Or maybe she was confiding in Brad again.
The Business Plan Page 4
