When Colour Became Grey

by A Lorenzen

  I gave in to the current and stepped closer towards the light, shading my eyes with my arm. There was no one around, but I had a strange sensation I was not alone. With every step I took the light got brighter and brighter around me. The dragging current grew stronger, grabbing me with its invisible hands, pulling me inwards like a black hole.

  Something ran down my forehead. I reached for it and looked at my hand; it was wet and clear. I touched my hair and it was wet. What had happened? I found I had trouble breathing. I looked down at myself again. Something was not right. I was both warm and cold. I opened my jacket and thick hot blood poured out of a wound by my stomach into the white surrounding. The blood immediately dissipated into thin air like smoke mixing into the air.

  The accident.

  The pain.

  It all came back to me.

  The car had crashed into me. It all came rushing back in powerful flashes. I tried to cover up the wound across my stomach, but the blood kept seeping through my fingers and disappearing into the nothing.

  What had happened? Was I dead? Dead?!

  Blake…

  Was this real?! Had he warned me I would die? Was this what he talked about? Was this part of the decision I had to make?

  The force pulling me into the brightness increased in painful waves with each memory of the accident that came back to me.

  Black shapes appeared amidst the whiteness. They floated towards me somehow without moving. Their bodies were pale as dead corpses and their long robes were black and moved around them as if they were underwater. Their dark clothes were an extreme contrast to the surrounding whiteness. It was painful to look at.

  ‘Ameerah…’ I could hear my name, but it didn’t come from the shapes approaching me; it came from everywhere, from inside my head.

  ‘You will be judged now,’ the voice announced. The shapes stopped in front of me and I could see there were five of them, looking at me. Their eyes were gone and grotesque black holes replaced them. A thin layer of skin stretched over their heads. So thin I could clearly see their skulls underneath the leathery skin. Where there should have been mouths, there was just leathery pale skin. The sight made me want to throw up.

  I remembered what Blake had said. He had given me instructions.

  ‘I want to cross,’ I eagerly tried to say but no words would leave my lips. My mouth was sown shut.

  ‘Everything has a price.’ Five voices echoed perfectly synchronized in my head, ‘Will you pay the price?’

  ‘Yes! Please, just let me go! I will pay!’ I pleaded in my mind.

  ‘It is agreed. You will serve sixty-seven years-’

  I was confused. ‘sixty-seven years?!’

  ‘As a ghost.’

  Somewhere a gong sounded. The echoing noise invaded the white space and the black shapes dissolved in the air like the blood from my stomach had. The strong current pulling me towards the light abruptly stopped and reversed. A cold rough wind knocked me over, only I did not hit the ground. I felt like I was falling down an elevator shaft. It would not end. I screamed in terror. It was suddenly very dark. The wind gushed past me.

  My body smashed into something cold. I grunted in anguish and tried to move. The sky was above me, my back on the hard ground. It was grey and lightly raining; twilight was approaching. In agony I raised myself up. My clothes were soaked in blood; when I pulled up my sweater, I saw an ugly scar stretching over my abdomen, it appeared to have been sown shut by an apprentice embalmer. It was horrible. I quickly covered it up again before my stomach contracted to empty itself.

  I walked into a busy shopping street with pedestrians crossing in all directions, pushing each other to get more quickly to their destinations.

  Where was I? An empty sensation passed through me. It disappeared as quickly as it had risen inside me, leaving me disoriented. I looked at the crowd zigzagging. The shops around me looked to be closing up and this was the rush of commuters hurrying home.

  ‘Excuse me,’ I tried to catch a man’s attention. He passed by me without even granting me a mere glance.

  Before I had turned to ask another person for help, a second empty sensation hit me, disappearing just as quickly as the first one had. The dizzying feeling afterwards made my stomach turn. Across the street I saw a bar. They would surely give me a glass of water.

  As I stepped into the crowd, the sensation of desolation repeated itself every few seconds, leaving me more and more drained. My feet stumbled backwards and I hit the wall with my back. The sensation stopped. I took a couple of breaths before attempting to cross the street once more, but the sensation returned. Every few seconds I was hit with this wave of dread and loneliness. Pushing as quickly as I could through the crowd, I reached the other side, exhausted. My hands held on to the door frame of the pub while I steadied myself. A burly man opened the door to the pub without glancing my way and walked through me. The feeling repeated itself.

  A thought passed my mind.

  That could not be.

  Terrified, I stretched my arm out slowly towards the rushing commuters. The moment someone passed through it, the sensation struck me. I retracted my arm and glued myself to the wall. Could they even see me?

  ‘Hello?’ I asked hesitantly but no one took notice.

  A couple of girls tumbled out of the pub on high heels, holding on to each other. I stepped in front of them. ‘Ladies can I-’ before I had finished my sentence, the brunette to the right had already passed through me. Literally.

  I was a ghost! An actual ghost! Where was I? What had happened to me? Was I dead? Was this what it felt like to be dead?

  Hugging myself I crumbled to the ground, motionless, letting the rain pelt down. What was going on? Was I dreaming? I had to be! This was not the afterlife! This couldn’t be!

  The rain had wet my clothes to my skin and made me shiver. The rush of people had dwindled down as time had passed and now the streets were empty. Twilight had gone and it was evening now.

  I wanted to go home. Immediately. Desperately. I jumped to my feet and ran up and down the streets, randomly. I tried to recognize any buildings, landmarks… but everything was different. There were buildings but nothing I recognized. Tears ran down my cheeks. I was lost and people were blind to my very existence. Was I being punished? What had I done to deserve this? Was this hell?

  The night air filled my lungs; I was too cold to stay outside. With nowhere to go and no idea where I was, I could only hope to locate Blake from my dreams. Only he seemed to have seen this coming. But how would I find him?

  I could hear rumbling noises not too far away coming from what looked like a rundown restaurant.

  When I came closer, I didn’t see anyone outside and the windows were taped shut from the inside with newspapers. Something tingled in my system and told me to proceed, so I opened the door and stepped into the restaurant. The only source of light was from a naked bulb dangling from the ceiling. The walls were scratched and beaten up to the point that I worried about the foundations. There were yaps and high-pitched noises coming from further inside. Something in my stomach made me keep going. There was something I had to see.

  I spied around a corner and saw three Bonobo-sized creatures crouched on the floor. They appeared to be animals, but I could not tell what kind. They were gathered around a person lying on the ground. I risked a step closer. The man lying on the floor was motionless. One creature was crouched by the man’s upper leg, the other two on his upper body.

  It hit me; the person on the ground was dead and the animals… were eating the corpse of a man!

  I was mortified. Being invisible was terrifying enough, but this was too much. The floor under me creaked; the three creatures turned their blood-covered faces simultaneously. The dead man had bite marks on his body and blood oozing out of them.

  Their skin was a mixture of light brown and green, with blood-coloured eyes and a long tail. Their claws were much longer than human fingers, their noses and mouths stuck out of their faces.
Two of them were bald while the third one had thin black oily hair on its scalp. They looked to be a cross of dogs and bats without any fur on their bodies. The creatures hissed in my direction, bearing their sabretooth-like teeth.

  I took another step backwards and they turned their bodies toward me, intrigued. Of course! This was hell so normal people couldn’t see me, but sabretooth-creatures could! Lucky me.

  Without wasting anymore time, I turned on my heels and ran as fast as I could out of the building and back into the misty rain. They followed roaring and hissing after me. I was too terrified to think of blocking the door behind me, but later wished I had. I ran faster than I ever had, but they were still catching up to me.

  My mind wasn’t thinking. After just a few minutes I sprinted down a street that turned out to be a dead-end. By the time I realized, the three creatures were already behind me, approaching on all fours with their tails raised high, blocking my exit. There was no other way out. Panic mounted inside me. I had to defend myself.

  There was nothing around me but a dumpster and some long dirty pieces of wood, probably from a construction site. Completely desperate, I picked up one of the wooden planks and held it like a baseball bat. The timber beam was heavy and long; I could barely hold it upright.

  This was a nightmare. I would die here… or die again! The adrenaline made me shiver. I prayed this was another nightmare and I would wake up, now!

  One of the creatures ran at me and jumped up, reaching with its claws for my face. I swung the wooden beam like I had seen in so many movies. To my surprise, I managed to make contact with its face. It crashed into the dumpster as the two others approached. I clubbed the second one in the same way, but the third swung out with its claws and scratched my shoulder. With another swipe it hit the arm that was holding my weapon and I lost hold of it. It splintered into pieces as it crashed into the corner of the dumpster. I kicked the beast with my foot in its stomach as hard as I could. The first creature had recovered and lunged towards me as I ducked to pick up a splintered piece of wood.

  Screaming and running only on hope, I rammed the piece of wood into its heart through its underbelly. The bright red eyes stared at me, its skin stretched thinly over its bones and the long teeth barely contained by its mouth. I slammed the piece of wood further into it and the creature slumped and fell to the ground. It terrified me to be so close to one.

  What was going on here? Had all monster tales been true? Was this hell? Wake up!

  The remaining two creatures threw themselves at me, overpowering me and smashing me onto the cold concrete. I kicked wildly at them, but they were too strong and my kicks were ineffective. The one with the oily hair roared again and I could see its teeth in the streetlight; the razor-sharp corner teeth glistened dangerously. Holding up my arms to protect my face, the creature sank its teeth into my forearm while I screamed in horror. The other sunk its teeth into my leg. I could feel them draining me of my blood; the pain paralyzed me. My body was set on fire. Was this how I would die? Or… die again?

  The burning sensation continued to spread. The pain dulled all my senses bit by bit. I hoped it would be over soon.

  Amidst the pain, the sound of gunfire ripped the air apart. The hairy monster close to my face dropped to the side; the other let out a tortured howl before falling limply to the ground as well.

  Determined steps approached me. I closed my eyes in despair and waited for the last shot. At least the nightmare would be over.

  ‘Come on, get up,’ the voice spoke in a firm tone. Someone grabbed me by my right arm and pulled me up in one quick motion. I opened my eyes.

  ‘Blake?!’ I asked baffled when I recognized his face. He was real! WAKE UP! I closed my eyes and wished to wake up in my bed, but as I opened them again, I was still in a dark alley held upright by Blake.

  ‘We have to get out of here, the others will smell the blood,’ he stated and laid my left arm around his shoulder. The deep scratches on my left shoulder and bites on my forearm and leg made every movement horrendous. Blake supported part of my weight and dragged me rapidly away from the bloody scene. I looked back and saw the three corpses lying on the floor; they looked tiny and inoffensive now.

  Blake hurried through the streets before aiming for an old blue truck. Opening the passenger door, he shoved me inside and rushed to the driver’s seat.

  The pain intensified and I started feeling lightheaded. The two places I had been bitten burnt horribly.

  ‘Where are you taking me?’ I slurred.

  ‘My place. We’ll be safe there.’ He took a look at me. ‘How badly are you hurt?’

  ‘I don’t… I was bitten twice and my shoulder-’ I shivered uncontrollably and the burning from the bites slowly spread. My hands started tingling.

  ‘We’re almost there, just hold on, ok?’ Blake said; his voice sounded far away.

  ‘What’s happening to me?’ I asked with clattering teeth, sweat pearling down my forehead.

  ‘Don’t worry, you’re safe with me,’ he answered.

  We came to an abrupt stop and he turned off the engine. We were in front of a three-story high white house with a flat roof in a suburban area.

  Blake pulled me through the front door and up the stairs. There, he laid me on a large wooden table in the middle of the living room. I was shivering from the wet rain and adrenaline cursing in my veins. My wounds burned so intensely, it made me dizzy and my brain fuzzy. Maybe I would die now and it would all stop.

  ‘Hold on, Ameerah.’ Blake fumbled around in the kitchen and rushed back towards me, ‘Where were you bitten?’

  I lay my hand on my leg and held my forearm up. He took out a giant needle and filled it with some liquid from a large clear bottle.

  ‘This is going to hurt,’ he said. Giving me no time to react, he had slammed the needle into my leg. I screamed in pain, and struggled and twisted, but Blake held me down easily with his muscled arms. Again, he filled the needle. I tried to wriggle away, but Blake had put one arm across my chest and pinned me down. The needle pierced through the flesh of my forearm. The two bite wounds sizzled like steaks on a hot grill. Blake pulled out a plastic bag filled with what I assumed was blood. For a third time, he inserted a needle into my arm, this time however it was connected to the blood bag.

  ‘You’ll be fine. You only have scratch wounds,’ he stated and disappeared again.

  I could see a strange clear liquid bubbling out of the bite in my forearm and the smell of rotten meat coming from it. There was a vaporizing sound whistling past my ear.

  On my left shoulder my torn clothes revealed deep gashes, nearly to the bone. Four long open crevasses stretched over my shoulder and arm. Who had done that to me? No, what had done that to me? What were those creatures from the alley?

  A numbing feeling spread from the back of my head all the way to my forehead as it began to dawn on me what I had agreed to by being here. This was not Earth. This was not normal.

  An irritating tinnitus sound manifested itself, becoming louder and louder in my head. What the hell had I agreed to? What was this place? Finally, I admitted to myself I might not be stuck in a nightmare, but in something much, much worse…

  ‘How are you feeling?’ Blake shouted from somewhere to my left. When I turned my head, I saw him putting the bottle with the clear liquid away.

  ‘Better,’ I answered, wrestling myself up into a sitting position. The burning sensation had pulsed down; I had stopped sweating and I was more aware of my surroundings. I healed fast, I noticed, too fast…

  Blake came back into the room and sat down on a chair not far away from me, leaning his arms on the armrests. He had a glass in his right hand containing some sort of whisky from the looks of it. His deep blue eyes lurked at me from under his blond hair.

  ‘You must have a lot of questions,’ he said. His head leaned against the back of the chair. Though his body was in shape, there was a look in his eyes that made me think he was tired and worn out.

  ‘Wher
e am I?’ I asked the most urgent question.

  ‘You died and chose to come here instead of going to heaven.’

  ‘So… is this hell?’ I whispered, fearing his answer.

  Blake took another sip without breaking eye contact. ‘No, you’re on Idolon. We are still on Earth, but this is a sort of parallel world to Earth.’

  ‘But… how does this place exist?’ My mind tried to comprehend what I was being told.

  ‘It was created a long time ago. Imagine a curtain between this world and where you used to live with your family and friends. Now you’re on this side, and the only way to get back to the human side is to finish your time here.’ Blake took another sip.

  Even if he had saved my life, I didn’t like it here. I didn’t like being around Blake, whoever he was. How could I trust him? This guy had haunted me for weeks and now I was taking every word he said for granted? No.

  I jumped off the table. The tube connecting the blood bag to my arm tugged at my veins. I reached for the bag and carried it with me in my right hand.

  ‘I don’t know what kind of games you’re playing but I’m not staying here. I didn’t die, I’m not in some weird Idolon parallel world and I am certainly not staying here! This doesn’t make any sense! I’m going home…’ I aimed for the staircase leading to the front door.

  ‘Ameerah I know it’s confusing, but you have to trust me.’ His tone was suddenly filled with authority and I stopped at the top of the stairs.

  ‘Why? Why should I trust you?’ I fired back at him.

  He gulped down the rest of his whisky and wandered towards the kitchen. ‘If it wasn’t for me, you’d be dead right now.’ He called out from the kitchen. I could hear him opening and closing cabinets, moving glass bottles around. ‘Do you want a drink?’

  ‘No thank you!’ I shouted back. There was no Idolon! What the hell was he talking about?

  A few moments later he emerged from the kitchen with two identical tall glasses. Blake walked over to me and stretched his right arm towards me. ‘It’s a gin and tonic.’