Playing with Desire (The Players Club Book 6)

by Erika Wilde

  With Declan enjoying a round of bourbon with the guys, who he’d gotten to know better the previous weekend at Mac’s bachelor poker party, Summer gravitated toward her group of friends as she sipped her cocktail, her gaze lingering on Declan despite the conversation going on around her. It was like she was trying to soak up every last minute with him. She wanted to imprint that toe-curling smile of his to memory, along with his deep, sexy laughter. And the way he looked so relaxed and at ease, a marked difference from the more reserved man she’d met three weeks ago at The Players Club.

  “Have you told him?”

  Paige’s voice startled Summer out of her thoughts, and she turned her head to meet her friend’s candid gaze. The rest of the women continued chatting among themselves, and Paige deliberately inched them away to keep their conversation more private.

  “Told him what, exactly?” Summer asked, not wanting to assume what her friend was asking.

  Paige’s red lips pursed in exasperation. “That you love him, and don’t even try and deny it,” she said quickly, not that Summer would. “I’ve watched you these past three weeks at work and with Declan, and you’ve gone from a smitten kitten to a woman who has fallen hard and fast for him. It’s so obvious in the wistful, longing way you look at him and the excitement in your voice when you talk about him.”

  Which made Summer wonder if Declan saw those things, too, but chose to ignore them because it was easier than accepting her love.

  She took a drink of her cocktail, her gaze traveling once again to Declan. God, her heart even fluttered when she looked at him. “No, I haven’t told him. Yet.”

  “I don’t know how he can’t realize how you feel,” Paige said with a shake of her head. “Unless he’s completely dense, as men tend to be.”

  Summer laughed. “Or maybe it’s like that big elephant in the room that he doesn’t want to address or acknowledge.”

  “So you plan to say something?” her friend prompted.

  “Yes.” Even before Paige’s pep talk, Summer had made that decision. She couldn’t let Declan leave without him knowing how she felt. Even if it didn’t change anything between them, it was a risk she needed to take, or she’d regret it for the rest of her life.

  The bride and groom finally joined the rest of their guests in the ballroom, and for the next half hour, everyone hugged the couple and congratulated them while they enjoyed a drink, too, before everyone sat down at their assigned seats for dinner to be served.

  Since there were only forty guests, Mac and Stephanie sat at a bridal table with just the two of them, while others were seated at small tables of six. Declan and Summer were paired up with Dean and Jillian and Raina and Logan. Halfway through the delicious five-course meal that had been prepared by a Michelin chef, Dean addressed Declan.

  “Aren’t you leaving for Fort Irwin tomorrow?” the other man asked him.

  Declan wiped his mouth with his napkin after a bite of his tender beef fillet. “Yes. I need to be checked in by five in the afternoon.”

  Dean nodded. “Be safe out there on your next mission.”

  “I always try to be,” Declan said with a smile.

  They ate a few more bites of their main entrée before Dean spoke again.

  “How much time do you have left on this contract?” he asked curiously.

  “Two more years before I reenlist.”

  Dean met Declan’s gaze from across the table. “I know you said you were career military, but if that ever changes, for whatever reason, Mac and I want to let you know that we’d love to have you on board at Noble and Associates.”

  The offer was sincere, and Summer cast a glance at Declan, taking in his surprised expression.

  “Thank you. I appreciate that. Honestly, I’ve never thought about leaving before retirement. I love what I do. Danger and all.”

  Summer’s stomach twisted with disappointment, which was a ridiculous reaction on her part, and she gently placed her fork on her plate, her appetite gone. She wasn’t sure what she’d been expecting, though for a handful of seconds, she’d stupidly hoped he’d might consider the idea. But clearly, Declan was committed to the army in a way he’d never commit to a woman.

  “I get it.” Dean’s tone was laced with understanding. “Just wanted to extend the offer so you know it’s there. You’d be an asset to our security team.”

  Summer didn’t hear the rest of the conversation and didn’t want to. From across the table, Jillian gave her a gentle, sympathetic look, as if she was well aware of the heartache that Summer was feeling.

  After the meal was finished, Summer excused herself to go to the ladies’ room, needing a few minutes to herself. She was thankful that no one followed her, and once she recollected her composure, she returned to the ballroom. The DJ was now playing music, and since Summer couldn’t find Declan with the lights dimmed, she instead watched the couples out on the dance floor enjoying themselves, including Mac and Stephanie. The fast, lively song segued into a slow one, and everyone paired off with their significant others to appreciate a romantic moment together.

  “I need a dance partner,” Rick said, coming up behind Summer and surprising her as he grabbed her hand and gave her a playful twirl before adding a dramatic dip at the end. “Care to indulge me?”

  She laughed at his flirtatious gesture, welcoming the lighthearted moment between them. “Look at you with your suave moves,” she teased him, grateful for a more pleasurable distraction from her doom-and-gloom thoughts. “Sure. Let’s dance.”

  They joined everyone else for the ballad, and Rick pulled her close, with one hand holding hers and the other placed low on her back. Even though their bodies were aligned intimately, the embrace wasn’t deliberately sexual, but Summer couldn’t deny the subtle awareness that trickled through her. She might have fallen in love with Declan, but it was hard to forget how pleasurable it had been with Rick that night at The Players Club, too.

  There was still a spark of attraction between them, not that either one of them would do anything about it when she was with Declan. But after spending three weeks living with Declan, there was no denying that she’d also grown closer to Rick, too—not sexually but emotionally.

  She glanced up at Rick and found him studying her face intently, no longer jovial as he’d been minutes before.

  “Are you doing okay?” he asked, a slight frown creasing his brows.

  She flashed him what she hoped looked like a cheerful smile. “Do I not look like I’m doing okay?”

  He gently caressed his hand up and down her back as their bodies swayed to the music. “Summer . . . you’ve lived with me and Declan for three weeks, and I already told you that I’m damn good at reading people. I’m even better when I’ve gotten to know them more personally.”

  “And?” she prompted, knowing he wasn’t done.

  He exhaled a deep breath, though his eyes were kind. “You’ve been wearing your heart on your sleeve the past few days, and quite frankly I’m worried about you.”

  A lump formed in her throat at his genuine caring. Trying not to let her emotions get the best of her, she rested her head on his shoulder, closed her eyes, and let the hand stroking her back soothe her. “I’ll be fine.”

  “Will you really?” he murmured into her ear, sounding doubtful.

  She swallowed hard. “Yes.” She had to be okay, because what choice did she have if Declan rebuffed her love?

  “I knew this was going to happen,” he muttered.

  The vehemence in his tone startled Summer, and she lifted her head to look up at him again. “You knew what was going to happen?”

  His lips thinned. “That you were going to fall for Declan, and he’s going to leave, and you’ll be left behind to pick up the pieces of your broken heart.”

  She slid her free hand down the lapel of Rick’s jacket, appreciating his anger on her behalf, even if it was misplaced. “Declan didn’t make me any promises, and I’m trying really hard to respect the fact that he was honest and
up-front right from the beginning about his intentions with me. But I do intend to tell him how I feel before he leaves for Fort Irwin tomorrow.”

  “I hope he’s smart enough to realize how special you are and that he’d be a fucking fool to not try and make things work with you somehow.”

  “I’m up against a lot of emotional demons,” she said, knowing it was true. The impact Declan’s father’s death in the line of duty had had on his mother was one, and Declan’s girlfriend’s inability to wait for the man she’d supposedly loved was another. They were legitimate issues that would mess with anyone’s head.

  “You certainly are,” Rick agreed, a wry smile on his lips. “And I’m really sorry for that, but if anyone can alleviate those demons in Declan and give him a reason to believe, it would be you.”

  “If he’ll let me.” She knew the odds weren’t in her favor, but she was determined to try.

  Empathy flickered in Rick’s gaze. “Just know that I’m here for you, okay? If you need someone to talk to after he leaves, or just someone to hang out with, you know where to find me.”

  She appreciated the offer more than he probably realized. “Thank you,” she said, and gave him a kiss on the cheek for being so understanding.

  “Mind if I cut in?” Declan asked gruffly, seemingly appearing out of nowhere.

  Rick slowly released her and stepped back, though his slightly annoyed gaze was on his stepbrother. “It’s about damn time you realized that Summer was with another guy.”

  Declan rolled his eyes at Rick’s comment, though Summer didn’t miss the spark of jealousy darkening his gaze. “And now you can get lost.”

  Rick walked off the dance floor, and Declan pulled Summer against him, resuming the slow, swaying dance, though the arms holding her now were much more possessive, which she found ironic since tomorrow he planned to walk away from her.

  “You two looked like you were in a serious conversation,” Declan said, bringing her attention back to him.

  “Not really,” she fibbed, and forced an amiable smile for now because it wasn’t the time or place for an emotional discussion. “We were just talking about how happy we are for Stephanie and Mac.”

  He appeared doubtful but didn’t push the issue. They finished the slow dance and stayed at the reception until the bride and groom left for the evening to start their honeymoon. Everyone said their goodbyes, and Summer, Declan, and Rick drove back home together since they’d arrived in the same vehicle. The ride was abnormally quiet, when typically the three of them didn’t lack for conversation.

  When they arrived back at the house, Rick announced he was going back out for the rest of the evening, and Summer knew it was his way of giving her and Declan alone time on their last night together. When she and Declan reached his room, she turned around for him to unfasten her dress. He brushed her hair over one shoulder and placed his warm mouth against her neck as he lowered the zipper. Goose bumps skittered along her flesh as his damp lips nuzzled the side of her throat, and when her garment dropped to the floor, she turned around and helped him undress, too.

  In between slow, hot, deep kisses, they stripped bare, the moment between them quiet and sweetly unrushed as they made their way to the bed. Over the past three weeks, sex with Declan had been playful, erotic, and at times downright dirty and lascivious. But this encounter was notably different, so charged with emotion and meaning. There was no denying the reverent way they touched one another or the slow, seductive way he made her orgasm with his mouth. He worshipped her body with his hands and lips before moving over her, pinning her hips to the mattress with his lower body and his cock poised at her slick entrance.

  Face-to-face, she slid her fingers into his hair and wrapped her legs tight around his hips. As he leisurely pushed his way into her, Summer swore she’d never forget the ardent way he looked at her as he gradually filled her with every hot inch of him until he was buried to the hilt and her pussy pulsed around his length.

  He groaned, long and low, not moving as desire and restraint etched his features. With his gaze locked on hers, he slid his hands beneath her back, then curled his fingers over her shoulders—letting her know that while this wasn’t going to be a fast and furious coupling like she’d grown accustomed to, he intended to drive as hard and deep as he could get while keeping her anchored beneath him.

  He finally began to slide in and out of her in deep, prolonged thrusts, slowly building the tension, as if he didn’t want to rush their final night of pleasure. She could feel him holding back as he continued those smooth strokes, until she was panting and writhing beneath him, her orgasm cresting.

  Refusing to climax without him, she looked up at him with pleading eyes. “Come for me, Declan,” she begged, when it was usually him making the demands. “I need to feel how much you want me.”

  “So . . . fucking . . . much,” he said, his voice a low, agonized growl as he slammed into her again, so hard and deep her breath caught in her throat.

  She brought his lips down to hers and kissed him, their tongues tangling as a switch seemed to flip in Declan and his control shattered. He drove his cock into her, ruthless and uncivilized, claiming and owning every single part of her body and soul as they came together in a mutual orgasm that was intense, all-consuming, and left her completely, emotionally spent.

  Chapter Eleven

  That’s how the rest of the night went . . . naps and waking up to make love. Summer couldn’t think of it any other way. Not when she’d already given him her heart, and during the course of the night, it had taken everything to hold back her declaration of love. No, when she said the words for the first time, she didn’t want it to be in the throes in passion but based in stark reality so there was no misconstruing her emotions.

  After a shower together in the morning, they went to the kitchen, where she made breakfast. Surprisingly, Rick joined them, though the atmosphere was subdued, for obvious reasons, and conversation was stilted.

  When they were done eating, Declan glanced at her and spoke, his entire demeanor reserved. “I need to take you home so Rick can drive me out to Fort Irwin.”

  He’d already told her that it was a three-hour drive just to get to the training center, and since she hadn’t been invited to join them, Summer assumed Declan was trying to make the break as easy as possible on her.

  “Okay,” she said, standing and gathering up the empty plates and utensils around the table, unable to stop the nerves from settling in since the moment of truth was upon her. “Most of my things are packed up, so it shouldn’t take me much longer to get ready after I do the dishes.”

  “I’ll clean up the kitchen,” Rick offered, his gaze encouraging Summer. “You two go and finish up whatever you have to do.”

  “Thank you,” she murmured, and walked back to Declan’s room, with him following.

  Once inside, she closed the door for privacy. Sitting on the dresser was his army bag packed with his personal effects, which were shockingly minimal, and the suitcase she’d used to bring her things over was open on the bed, most of her clothes and toiletries inside.

  She turned to face him, hating that isolated look on his face, as if he’d already put his emotional walls up in preparation of leaving today. “I have something for you,” she said, because regardless of how the rest of their morning went, she wanted him to have this gift.

  He eyed her tentatively. “Okay.”

  Picking up her phone, she opened her app for photos and sent half a dozen pictures to his device. His unit pinged as each one came though.

  He cocked his head curiously. “What did you just send me?”

  She bit her bottom lip anxiously. “Open your phone and see for yourself.”

  He did, and Summer knew the exact moment he laid eyes on the sexy boudoir photographs she’d asked Kendall to take of her. His eyes widened in surprise, and despite how grave things had been a few moments ago, a sinful smile curved his lips as he looked back up at her.

  “Holy shit,” he
said, desire roughening his voice as he returned his attention to his phone and stared at one picture in particular. “These shots are so fucking hot.”

  The suggestive poses and sensual lingerie she’d worn were more seductive than explicit, leaving enough to the imagination. All intimate female parts had been strategically covered, but mostly it was the expressions on her face as she’d looked at the camera—sultry, seductive, and provocative—that made each shot so arousing.

  She grinned playfully at him. “I thought maybe the photos would help during those times you might need some visual stimulation,” she said meaningfully. And she wanted him to remember her, no matter how today ended. “Just keep your phone locked, because I’d rather not have those photos circulating.”

  “I’ll password protect them,” he assured her, his gaze softening for a moment. “Thank you.”

  It grew quiet between them, and those nerves bubbled up inside her again, and she valiantly pushed past the doubts and uncertainties in order to say what she needed him to hear. “There’s something else I need to give you.”

  He shut down his phone and put it on the dresser next to his duffle bag. “What’s that?”

  She inhaled deeply and replied on the exhale. “I need to give you my love.”

  He stiffened, a blank slate falling over his features. “What do you mean?”

  She knew he was attempting to deflect and act stupid, but Summer closed the distance between them and placed a hand on his jaw, lined with soft morning stubble. She held his gaze so there would be no misconstruing her words or what she meant. “I want . . . no, I need you to know that I love you.”

  He closed his eyes and groaned, the sound almost agonizing. Then he shook his head, opened his eyes, and took her hand from his cheek. “Summer . . . don’t waste your love on someone like me.”

  The way he said those words made Summer’s heart squeeze tight in her chest. Don’t waste your love on someone like me. . . as if he didn’t believe himself worthy of the emotion. “I already did,” she said, tipping her head up a bit stubbornly. “Are you saying you don’t want it?”