Love After Dark, McCarthys of Gansett Island, Book 13
Page 29
She’d received the message he’d sent her in his speech loud and clear. What they’d found together didn’t come around every day. She certainly knew that, but she’d like to think she’d learned from the mistakes of the past and couldn’t gamble her future—or Ethan’s—even for something as wonderful as what she had with Paul. She would never again allow herself to become financially dependent upon a man, no matter how much she loved him or suspected he loved her.
Her gaze took in the room full of happy people and found Ethan at a table with Seamus, Carolina, Kyle and Jackson. The three boys were giggling at something Seamus was saying to them, and her heart ached all over again at the thought of taking him away from his new friends. Ethan had thrived here, and having to tell him they were leaving had nearly killed her.
He’d been furious with her ever since, which had only made a difficult situation worse.
A tap on her shoulder had her spinning around to find Paul standing behind her, extending a hand to her. “Dance with me.”
She noted that the request wasn’t made in the form of a question but rather a plea. Powerless to resist him, she took his hand and let him lead her to the dance floor. Of course the song had to be Elvis Presley singing “Can’t Help Falling in Love.”
For the first time since the last time she’d been in his arms, the ache inside her subsided and the longing intensified.
“You look so incredibly sexy today,” he whispered in her ear, setting off a whole other reaction.
“That wasn’t the goal,” she said with a nervous laugh.
“You’re effortlessly sexy.”
In all the years she’d been married, her husband had never said anything like that to her. Everything about this man was different from the man she’d married, but even knowing that, she couldn’t seem to throw caution to the wind and forget the many lessons she’d learned the hard way.
She’d thought about his sweet offer many times during sleepless nights and had been tempted more than once to say to hell with lessons learned. What did they matter if it meant having to live without him? But then she’d remember what it had felt like to be desperate and alone and deeply in debt, and the fear would trump the desire every time.
“Ethan is spending the night with Seamus and Carolina,” Paul whispered in her ear. “After the wedding, I need a few minutes of your time.”
Surprised to hear of plans she’d known nothing about, she said, “Wait, since when is he staying with them?”
“Since I asked if he could. They were happy to have him. Seamus said he’s good for the boys because he makes them laugh, and they need that right now.”
“Why did you ask if he could stay there?”
“Because we need to talk, and I want you all to myself when we do.”
Though every part of her wanted to hear what he had to say, her better judgment ruled the day. “It’s not a good idea, Paul.”
“How do you know that?” he asked, his dark eyes dancing with amusement. “You haven’t heard what I have to say yet.”
She shook her head. “I can’t let this get any worse than it already is. These last couple of weeks…”
“I know, sweetheart. Believe me. I know. Give me tonight. Please?”
Her better judgment was going to have to get the hell out of the way, because there was no way she could deny him when he asked for something in that particular tone of voice. “Okay.”
Erin had to work up the nerve, once her bridesmaid duties were officially finished, to take Slim over to meet her parents. Thankfully, her ankle had healed enough to forgo the crutches, but the high-heeled sandals would have to go soon because her ankle was beginning to ache.
“Mom, Dad, this is my friend Slim Jackson,” she said, having practiced the introduction in her mind repeatedly in the last few days. “Slim, my parents, Mary Beth and Tom Barton.”
“Such a pleasure to meet you,” Slim said, full of the charm she’d come to expect from him. He looked amazing in a navy suit with a light blue shirt. His dark hair had been combed into submission, and she’d felt his sexy brown eyes on her all day while she tended to Jenny.
“I understand we have you to thank for rescuing Erin after she hurt her ankle,” her dad said.
Erin had no doubt her parents would love Slim. He was their kind of guy—friendly, accomplished, easy to talk to. In many ways, he reminded her of Toby. He’d been less gregarious than Slim but no less charming.
“That was certainly no hardship,” he said with a smile for her. They talked for a few minutes about Slim’s work as a pilot. “Could I get you a drink?”
“That’d be nice,” Mary Beth said. “White wine for me and a beer for Tom, please.”
“For you?” he asked Erin.
“I’m good for now. Thanks.”
“Be right back.” He walked backward toward the bar. “Don’t talk about me while I’m gone.”
Erin rolled her eyes and laughed at him.
“Well,” her mom said, taking a closer look at Erin. “What’s this I see? A spark of true interest?”
“Perhaps,” Erin said. “It’s very new. Don’t get too excited just yet.”
“He’s lovely,” her mom said. “Handsome as all get-out, too.”
“Is he? I hadn’t noticed.”
That made them both laugh, which warmed her heart. For many years after Toby died, she’d wondered if any of them would ever laugh again.
“I assume Slim is a nickname?” Mary Beth asked.
“It is, and you’re not going to believe what his real name is.”
“What?”
“Tobias Fitzgerald Jackson Junior.”
“Oh,” Mary Beth said, the single word sounding more like a gasp. “That’s…”
“Crazy,” Tom said softly.
“Isn’t it?” Erin asked. “When he first told me… You’re going to think it’s silly, but…”
“You felt like our Toby might’ve sent him to you,” Mary Beth said.
“Yes,” Erin said, relieved that her mom got it. “I’d like to think such things are possible.”
“So would we,” Tom said, smiling at her. “Your brother would be pleased to see Jenny so happy, and he’d like your Slim.”
“I’m glad you think Toby would’ve liked him, but he’s not my Slim,” Erin said. “We’re friends. That’s all.”
“I guess we’ll see about that, won’t we?” Tom asked with a wink for his daughter.
Slim returned with drinks for her parents, which they accepted graciously.
“You two ought to go dance,” Mary Beth said. “I love this song.”
The DJ was playing “When a Man Loves a Woman.”
“May I?” Slim asked with a gallant bow as he extended his arm to her.
“She’d love to,” Mary Beth said.
“Honestly, Mother.” Erin sent her parents a teasingly withering look and let Slim lead her to the dance floor. “Sorry about that.”
“About what?” he asked as his arms came around her for the first time since he carried her into the lighthouse.
Erin had danced with plenty of men, but never before had she been so unsure of where to put her hands or why it seemed so difficult to get air to her lungs. God, he smelled good.
“You okay?”
“Um, sure. Why?
“You’re kind of stiff.”
She blew out a breath and tried to force herself to relax.
“It’s okay,” he said. “I’m used to it. I have that effect on women.”
Erin poked his rock-hard abdomen, which made him laugh and helped her to relax. A little. Why did this moment feel so damned monumental? It was just a dance, for crying out loud.
“By the way, in case I forget to tell you later, that’s the sexiest bridesmaid gown I’ve ever seen.”
“I’m sure you’ve seen a lot of them.”
“Most of them are hideous. That one is H-O-T.”
“Thank you,” she said, pleased and ridiculously aroused by his complimen
t. “My parents liked you.”
“That’s great to hear. They’re nice people, and it’s good of them to be here.”
“They love Jenny like a daughter. They wouldn’t have missed it.”
Off to the side of the dance floor, her parents were having an animated conversation with Jenny’s parents.
“Hard to think about how differently that relationship should’ve played out,” Erin said, and then caught herself when she realized she’d said it out loud. In for a penny… “They should be sharing grandchildren by now.”
He tightened his hold on her and touched his lips to her forehead, the simple gesture of comfort doing far more to soothe her than words ever could.
When she opened her eyes, she caught Jenny watching her with an astonished expression on her face.
Erin sent her a goofy grin that would ensure a flurry of texts from Hawaii.
“People are looking at us,” he said in a conspiratorial whisper. “I think we’re officially going public here. How do you feel about that?”
“I’m not sure what you mean,” she said, playing for time to formulate a witty reply.
“You, me, dating, public, people knowing. Is that okay?”
“Oh, so now we’re dating?”
“You asked me out today, didn’t you? You agreed to go to dinner with me, didn’t you? When I take you home later, you’re probably going to want to kiss me, aren’t you?”
Erin’s system overheated at the thought of kissing him. “Don’t count your chickens, my friend.”
His low chuckle rumbled through his muscular body, but then he pulled her in even closer to him, and her mind went totally blank of all thoughts except for how much she hoped he’d carry through on that “threat.”
Chapter 28
With his plans for later coming together, Paul endeavored to enjoy the day with friends and family who’d come from near and far to celebrate with Jenny and Alex. They ate and drank like kings and danced liked fools. The tuxedo jackets came off, the bow ties were removed, and the ladies kicked off their heels.
It was a blast. After the years of agony surrounding their mother’s illness, Paul enjoyed a rare day without the many responsibilities that had weighed so heavily on him for such a long time.
Evan and Owen took over during the DJ’s break and played a set that had everyone singing at the top of their lungs before Jenny and Alex once again took center stage for one last dance. They departed a few minutes later in a shower of rose petals and well wishes.
All in all, a perfect day, and one that Paul intended to make even better when he got Hope home. He’d quit drinking hours ago so he could drive her home and so he’d have his wits about him as he made his case to her. This was the most important thing he’d ever do, and he was determined to do it right. She deserved nothing less than his very best, and that was what she’d always get from him, if only he could convince her to let him try to make her happy.
Ethan had been thrilled to leave with the O’Gradys, and it was nice to see him smiling again.
“What a day,” he said as he drove home with Hope in the passenger seat of his truck where he hoped to see her for the rest of his life.
“It was awesome,” Hope said. “They’re so happy.”
He again noted the wistful tone of her voice. “Yes, they are.”
“That was the most beautiful wedding I’ve ever been to, especially knowing what she’s been through to get there.”
“I know. It was so cool that Toby’s parents were there, too. That meant a lot to her.”
They fell silent for the rest of the ride home. Paul tried not to think about the tension he felt coming from her, but rather tried to stay focused on his plans—and his agenda. He brought his truck to a stop in the driveway outside the house and turned off the engine.
“Give me five minutes, and I’ll be back to get you, okay?” He’d set everything up before he left.
“Oh, um, okay.”
He loved that nervous little hitch in her voice. He loved that she had no idea what was about to happen. The only thing that could make this better was if he knew what her answer would be. But he’d chosen to have faith in what he felt for her and what he knew she felt for him, even if the words had never been spoken.
With a spring in his step, he bounded up the stairs and went inside to light the candles he’d bought at Tiffany’s store with this moment in mind. In deference to the chill in the October air, he also lit the fire he’d laid earlier, hoping it would be cool enough for it.
Paul took a critical look at the room before he went back outside to help her out of the truck. He would’ve loved to pick her up and carry her inside, but he erred on the side of reserve so he wouldn’t scare her off. He kept a light grip on her hand, though, as he led her up the stairs, letting her go ahead of him into the house.
She stopped right inside the door. “Paul… What… What’s all this?”
“Come in, and I’ll tell you.” He helped her out of his tuxedo coat that she’d worn home and tossed it over a chair.
Though she curled her hand around his, he felt her reluctance in every step she took to the sofa, where they sat next to each other.
He turned to face her, and the wariness he saw in her expression had him aching for the suffering that had made it so difficult for her to trust him. Here goes…
Linking their fingers, he gazed into her eyes. “Remember when we talked about you and Ethan staying here, and I said I’d take care of you?”
She bit her lip and nodded. “I remember.”
“It occurred to me afterward that I’d left out a few important details.”
“What details?”
His heart pounded double time as he dropped to his knees before her.
She gasped. “Paul…”
“The most important detail that I forgot to mention is that I love you, Hope. I love you and I love Ethan, and I want you both in my life to stay. When I said I wanted to take care of you, I meant it, but I also understand how important it is to you to be independent financially and professionally. And that’s why I think you should go forward with your plans to get a job on the mainland, but maybe a part-time job one or two days a week? We’ll rent an apartment over there for when you have to work, as long as you come home to Ethan and me when your shift ends. I want to make this our home—and you can do anything you want to the house to make it your own. I want to raise Ethan as if he were my own. I want to have more babies with you. I want everything with you, and I swear to you—on my life and the lives of everyone I love—I will never be untrue to you. Will you marry me, Hope?”
Tears were sliding down her cheeks, and for the life of him, he couldn’t tell if they were happy tears or sad tears.
“Hope?”
“You… You love me?”
He laughed softly. “Did you hear anything else I said after that?”
“I heard all of it.” She wiped away the tears that continued to come.
From his pocket, he produced the ring he’d carried around all day like a talisman, hoping it would bring him luck.
“That’s your mother’s,” she whispered.
“Alex gave it to me and told me to give it to you. He said our mom, the mom we knew and loved for so long, would want you to have it because she’d love you for me. She’d love us together.”
Hope covered her mouth and shook her head.
Did that mean she was saying no? He honestly didn’t know how he would cope if she turned him down. Gambling on the fact that he suspected she loved him as much as he loved her, he took hold of her left hand and slid the ring on her finger. “Well, look at that,” he said reverently. “It fits like it was meant for you. My father gave my mother this ring on their twentieth anniversary. She loved it almost as much as she loved him. I want what they had, Hope. I want what Alex has with Jenny. And I want it with you. So will you please marry me?”
“Yes,” she whispered, so softly that he thought for a second he was hearing things.
<
br /> “You want to say that one more time so I can be sure I heard you right?”
“Yes, Paul,” she said, smiling as the tears continued to roll down her cheeks. “I’ll marry you.”
Only then was he able to indulge in the first truly deep breath he’d taken all day. He gathered her into his arms and held on tight, thanking God and his father and anyone else who might’ve played even a small part in making sure this went his way—that it went their way.
“I love you, too,” she said, breaking the silence. “And what you said…”
He tucked her hair behind her ear. “What did I say?”
“About me working and how you’ll never be untrue… You can’t possibly know what that means to me.”
“I do know. I know you, and I know what matters to you, and I want to be what you want and need.”
“You are. You already are.”
He kissed her then the way he’d been dying to during the lonely nights when she’d been so close to him but so far away.
Her arms came around him as she returned the kiss, matching his desperation. They ended up on the sofa, him on top of her as the agony faded away, leaving only a lifetime of joy to look forward to. “Here we are again on the sofa where you first kissed me.”
“You’re never going to forget that, are you?”
Smiling, he said, “Nope.” He stared at her gorgeous face because he could. “I’ll always be thankful that you lost your mind and kissed me. It saved us a ton of time that we might’ve wasted pretending this wasn’t happening.”
“The first day we met, I thought, wow… He’s going to be my boss?”
“Really?”
She nodded. “I had to remind myself to keep it professional. Until I forgot.”
“Thank God for that.” He kissed her again. “Alex said we’ve been eye-fucking each other since the day we met.”
She dissolved into helpless laughter. “Your brother certainly has a way with words.”
“That he does, but he’s not wrong about how long I’ve wanted you, even if I tried to pretend otherwise because you worked for us.” He tugged at her bodice. “How do we get this sexy dress off you?”