Gold

by K. A. Linde

  “Then, have her call me when they break up,” Bryna said, standing.

  “You’re a stubborn bitch.”

  “Yep,” she agreed.

  She felt even more like one when she left Trihn’s place and saw another missed call from Eric along with a text message.

  I’ll stop bothering you after this. You want space to figure things out. I don’t get it because every part of me is screaming to be near you. I know you feel the same. Call me an idiot for what happened over the past couple of months. Whatever you want. But, Bri, I’ll never be that idiot again. I can’t imagine my life without you. I’m still the same person. I’m still your cowboy. Come back to me soon.

  Bryna bit down on her lip, hard. Then, she deleted the text and promised not to look back.

  TRUE TO HIS PROMISE, Bryna hadn’t heard from Eric since that last text message. Several long weeks had gone by, school had released for the summer, and she hadn’t heard one word from him. Just like she had wanted. At least that was what she told herself when her Sunday afternoons were full of finals prep rather than margaritas and on Wednesdays when she ate lunch alone instead of at his place, grilling burgers.

  But none of that mattered now. She could adjust to anything. And it was for the better. She was ready to leave for Barcelona for the summer. She met Hugh in New York City with a ridiculous amount of Louis Vuitton luggage and her overused passport.

  Their flight to Barcelona was smooth sailing, and they landed in the beautiful afternoon weather. A limo picked them up from the airport and transported them to the completed resort. It wouldn’t officially open for nearly another month, so they were staying there exclusively until then.

  Together, they spent the weeks leading up to the big ribbon-cutting ceremony lounging on the Spanish beaches, shopping, and hitting every romantic location in the city. Hugh had to work a lot, but he tried to make up for it with over-the-top evenings.

  When he was gone, it gave her time to think about why she had left. Eric’s face popped into her mind over and over again. She tried to forget the look on his face when he had begged her to stay, but she couldn’t. And though she was still so angry with him and herself for what had happened, the distance made the reality of his actions wane.

  She knew it could never be the same. Part of what had made them, them was a lie. But she hoped they could have a part of their friendship back. She wasn’t ready to confront that now, but maybe she would be when she got back from Barcelona. Maybe.

  Hugh caught her lounging by the pool during one such instance when her mind was off thinking about what she had left behind in Vegas.

  “Hey, gorgeous.” He kissed the top of her head.

  She startled. “Oh, hey.”

  “You seemed far away. Where were you?”

  She smiled lazily to try to hide the thoughts warring through her mind. “Just excited for the ceremony tonight. Glad it’s finally here.”

  “And sad that it means our time together this summer is coming to a close,” he finished for her.

  “Oh, don’t remind me.”

  She didn’t know what was going to happen with them after this. He had said he loved her. That left a whole lot of nagging questions in her mind, questions she was trying to avoid like the plague. What would happen from here? How could we be together when he’s married? Is this going to be a permanent arrangement? It was confusing because though she had made her decisions, she felt as if she should know more about him. She wanted to ask all the questions she had avoided before because she didn’t think they mattered. But she didn’t.

  “You’re gone again.”

  She laughed and tried to play it off. “No, I’m still here. How was work?”

  “Everything is set up for the ceremony down to the minute details. I came to check to see if you were ready for all of this?”

  “Sure. Why wouldn’t I be?”

  “Well, it will all be filmed. I’ll be showcasing you to the world.”

  She swallowed. “Really? You didn’t mention that.”

  “It’s been picked up by some national and international media. I didn’t want to scare you. You’ll be at my side, and I’ll do all the talking. You just have to be your beautiful self.”

  “Oh. Right.” Arm candy. “Well, I’ve been in front of a camera before. So, no big deal, I guess.”

  She wished he hadn’t kept it from her. It wasn’t like she was afraid to be on camera, but it was another big step. What the hell is he going to say if someone asks why I’m here with him? It was all so confusing.

  “If you’re not comfortable, I can have you in a strategic position off camera.” He pulled her hand up to his lips and lightly kissed her fingers. “But I want you to be with me.”

  “That’s why I’m here. Of course, I’ll be on camera with you, if that’s what you want.”

  “Good.” He smiled brightly. “You should probably go get ready then. I have a surprise for you.”

  “A surprise?” she asked, her face lighting up. “You’re full of surprises.”

  “I am. I like to surprise you.”

  “Well, now, I’ll spend all afternoon wondering.”

  He gave her an easy smile. Everything was always so easy for him. She wished she could push all her cares away so readily.

  “Good. I’ll see you at the ceremony. I can’t wait to see your dress. Are you sure I can’t look ahead of time?”

  “I’ve spent a lot of time keeping this secret from you! You can’t look now.”

  He backed away with his hands up. “Of course. I’ll allow you to surprise me this once then.”

  A couple of hours later, Bryna was refreshed with her hair pulled back into a severe twist and her makeup dark and smoky. Her dress was an exquisite floor-length racerback Dior creation, hand-beaded in bright reds, with a slit that reached to her upper thigh when the panels separated. It was both elegant and sexy.

  When she walked out of the room, the look on Hugh’s face made the whole ensemble worth it.

  “Now, how am I supposed to keep my hands off of you through the entire ceremony?” he asked.

  She smirked, triumphant. “You’ll have to give it your best shot.”

  “I am going to have a lot of jealous colleagues.”

  He offered her his arm, and she fit her hand into the crook of his elbow. His lips landed on hers, tender and thoughtful, filled with all the love he professed to her on a regular basis. She still hadn’t returned the phrase, but every time he kissed her, it was as if he didn’t need to hear the words. He acted as if he could taste them.

  They walked together down to the entrance. Hugh shook hands with a few people in the lobby while a bunch of people gave her the side eye. They knew she had been there with him the whole time, and still, they skeptically looked at her. Hugh didn’t even seem to notice. He grabbed her hand once more, and they walked out to the crowd of people and up onto a platform.

  Then, Hugh started his speech. She stood next to him. Cameras flashed everywhere. It reminded her of the red carpet she had been on countless times with her father and Gates. All of the eyes should have made her feel better, but suddenly, she felt worse. She enjoyed this, but she didn’t love Hugh. She didn’t know if she would ever love him. She liked him. She liked their time together, but she didn’t feel that spark.

  But he kept saying it. He kept saying it like love existed. Love was laced with poison, and each time she drank from the bottle, she died a slow, painful death.

  The applause jolted her out of her thoughts. Hugh reached forward, holding up some impossibly large gold scissors, and cut the ribbon. There were a series of pictures, and then everyone was herded inside to the ballroom. A huge after-party was being held in all the hotel ballrooms to celebrate the new resort. Hundreds of people flooded in behind them, and Hugh smiled at them all, greeting them and thanking them for coming to the resort. He was an eternally gracious host.

  “Come on, while everyone’s distracted,” he said. He took her arm and pulled her out a
side door to a deserted balcony overlooking the city below.

  Bryna leaned her elbows against the railing and let the breeze kiss across her skin. “That was a lot of people.”

  “And everyone was watching you.”

  She glanced over at him and laughed lightly. “You were the one giving the speech.”

  “Hey, I would have been watching you, too, if I could have.”

  “You see me all the time.”

  “But not in this dress.” His hands slid down her hips.

  “No. I normally wear less.”

  Hugh smiled and then took a calming deep breath. He actually looked…nervous. That’s odd. He’s never like that.

  “I have your surprise.”

  She arched an eyebrow. Suddenly, her nerves tingled up her back in warning. She didn’t even know why, but it hit her hard.

  He swallowed and then pulled out a flat blue velvet box from his jacket pocket. Her eyes locked on it.

  “I told you earlier that I wasn’t ready for you to leave me after the summer. The truth is, I don’t want you to leave at all. My life is complete with you in it. I enjoy waking up every day and finding you beside me. I haven’t felt like this in a very, very long time.”

  Her ears were ringing. She could barely hear what he was saying.

  He opened the box, and inside was a stunning Harry Winston collar necklace of exquisite diamonds. It looked as if it weighed a ton, and it shined so bright that it was almost blinding. Her hand went to her mouth in shock.

  “I love you. I know you’ve been kind of distant, and we haven’t even been together for a year, but this feels too real to me. I want it to be real for you. I didn’t know what your dress looked like, but I figured that diamonds matched everything. You always wear your B, but I wanted you to wear something of mine tonight.”

  “Hugh,” she breathed.

  She shook her head. How is this happening? He had all but said he wanted to marry her. Besides the fact that he was already married, she was only fucking eighteen years old. This couldn’t be real.

  “I just…”

  “Let me put it on for you.”

  “Wait,” she said.

  She put her hand out and touched the necklace. She couldn’t do this. She had thought this was what she wanted. She had thought all the glitz and glamour would make up for what had happened with Jude. He had created her, and she had let herself fall into this trap. But by letting Hugh think I love him, am I any better than Jude in the end?

  She didn’t want to lead Hugh on. When it had been fun and carefree, she had assumed they were both on the same page. But this wasn’t a game. This was someone’s life. And it had lost its luster. She no longer wanted to be the person Jude had created.

  “What? What is it?” he asked with so much concern in his voice.

  “I don’t think I can do this. I don’t get where you think this is headed.” She looked up into his eyes. “I mean…you’re married.”

  Hugh’s shock was evident. He snapped the box closed, nearly biting into her hand, before she snatched it away.

  “What are you talking about? I’m not married!”

  BRYNA’S JAW DROPPED. “What?”

  “Why would you think that?”

  “I…I don’t know.”

  She really didn’t. She had thought Hugh was like Jude and that everything was the same. But after his confession of love for her and this new revelation that he wasn’t actually married, she was scrambling to find a reason for her actions.

  Hugh’s expression only darkened further. “Did you believe this whole time that this was acceptable behavior for a married man? Did you think I’d sleep with you and tell you I love you if I were with someone else?”

  Bryna opened and closed her mouth, unable to form words. She had thought those things. She had thought them the whole time. It hadn’t even bothered her even though she knew it should have.

  “Well? Is this what you think of me? You believe I would deceive you so thoroughly…and my wife at that.” He shook his head. His anger had gone from simmer to full boil in under a minute.

  “No. I don’t know. It…wouldn’t be the first time I’ve been with someone like that,” she whispered.

  His narrowed eyes and clenched jaw told her that was the exact wrong thing to say. Fuck.

  “So, you’ve done this before?”

  “I…” She swallowed and tried to hold herself up. She couldn’t believe this was spiraling. “I didn’t do it intentionally.”

  “But this was intentional with me?”

  Bryna cringed. It had been intentional. She had plotted their relationship out with practiced precision from the get-go.

  “Christ, it was.”

  “Hugh…”

  “No.” He held his hand up to silence her.

  She clamped her mouth shut.

  “I don’t want to hear your excuses. I thought, with your past, who your father is, your previous relationship with Gates Hartman, your trust fund—”

  “You know about my trust fund?” she asked in shock. This sounded like he had done more than a background check.

  “I told you, I covered my bases. I didn’t want to be made a fool of.” He stared at her, plainly stating she was making a fool of him at the present moment. “What did you expect to happen, Bryna? I screened you. Our first few dates were to ensure this wouldn’t happen. It seems that being around actors much of your life has made you a pretty adept one. Do you even care about me?”

  And there it was. Under all the anger and carefully controlled businessman facade, the hurt was showing through.

  “Yes,” she said, her voice wobbling.

  “But you don’t love me?”

  “No,” she whispered.

  He looked as if she had slapped him. “How could you, when you thought I was cheating on my wife to be with you?”

  His question was rhetorical, and she kept her mouth closed. She didn’t want to do any more damage.

  He tore away from her, walking the length of the balcony in a fury before returning to her. His hands were fisted at his sides. “I don’t understand. We’re in Barcelona together. I’ve brought you halfway around the world. I’ve introduced you to all my business associates. I put you on fucking television at my side!” he yelled. “Didn’t you think more people would be concerned about my actions? Didn’t all the signs point to me being available? And why the hell didn’t you say something?”

  His desperation ripped through her.

  “I don’t know. I…thought everyone was in on it.” As soon as the words had left her mouth, she realized how bad it made her sound.

  “Yes, they’re all in on it,” he said coldly. “Because my wife is dead.”

  Bryna covered her mouth. Good God, what the hell is wrong with me?

  “If you had done your research as I had, you would know she died nearly five years ago.”

  “I’m…I’m so sorry.”

  “Yes. Well,” he said, waving away her pity, “I thought I was moving on.”

  “With me,” she whispered. She truly felt like a horrible person.

  “Yes, with you! I’ve given you the world, and you’ve spit in my face,” he exploded. He ground his teeth together, trying to restrain himself. “Have you been with others while we’ve been together?”

  Bryna looked away, not wanting him to see the guilt in her eyes. She had finished things with Andrew before sleeping with Hugh. But she’d kissed Eric three times since then. She might have only initiated it once, but she had wanted more. She would have done more if things had been different.

  “Christ,” he said, stumbling back a step. “You have, haven’t you?”

  “No! No. I haven’t slept with anyone.”

  “Then, what did you have to think about?” He didn’t let her answer before barreling forward. “Is this why you came to see me in Atlantic City? Is that why you were upset? Were you with someone else?”

  “I was upset about my friends, like I told you. One of them is a
guy, but we were never together. Actually, I thought he was gay up to that point.”

  Hugh grabbed his hair in frustration. “I don’t know what to say about any of this. I thought we were working toward something. Now, I’m terrified to find out what you wanted from me if you didn’t love me.”

  Bryna looked away.

  “Was it the money?” he spat in disgust. “I’ve had people want me for it before, but I thought you were different.”

  She couldn’t respond. At first, it had been the game to have the power, to have the thrill of someone showering her with goodies like Jude had. But then, over time, it had gotten worse. She’d wanted more. She’d basked in the rush of getting everything. But it wasn’t just the money. She had cared for him. She had thought they had an agreement. She had thought he knew what he was getting into. Now, this…

  “Say something!”

  “No! It wasn’t just the money. It was you, too…I liked being with you, too.”

  “Not just the money,” he murmured, stunned.

  She covered her face with her hands and took a steadying breath. “That’s not what I meant.”

  “Sir,” someone called, interrupting their argument, “it’s time for your speech.”

  “I’ll just be a minute,” he said, not turning around. His eyes were hard. “When I get back…you should figure out exactly what you do mean.”

  Hugh left her alone on the balcony. The door closed behind him.

  “Fuck!” she yelled into the silence.

  She closed her eyes and tried to piece herself back together. Things hadn’t just spiraled out of control with her accusation about him being married. It had plummeted to the bottom of the Mariana Trench.

  What the hell am I going to say to him? Everything he had said hit too close to home. She had been digging him. Though she had never clarified, she had thought they were on the same page. Now, it looked like they hadn’t even been reading the same book.

  She was trying to figure out what to say to him when her cell phone went off in her purse. She jolted out of her thoughts and stared down at it in shock. She had forgotten that she even had it with her. No one had called her all summer. She had received messages from Trihn online but not phone calls.