Neil LaBute, Plays 2

by Neil LaBute

  Betty Yeah?

  Bobby I do. I feel it and I believe it’s true.

  Betty Well, you think what you want. I need to get home.

  Bobby I think there’s something on that laptop you don’t want people to know about.

  Betty …

  Bobby Am I right?

  Betty This is … Why do you have to do this to me?

  Right now? Huh?!

  Bobby I’m not doing anything that you didn’t do already. This is your mess, sis. This one right here … it’s all yours. Like usual. You fuck shit up and then you want it to be all better, to just go away … Well, it doesn’t, Betty. OK? Bad shit lives on and you can’t outrun it. You can’t.

  Betty I just … I bought him this computer! Gave him the money to purchase it, and he –

  Bobby No, you didn’t. That just isn’t true …

  Betty You don’t know everything!!

  Bobby I know enough. I know that machine is not new and … Well, doesn’t matter. (Beat.) So why?

  Betty … Because.

  Bobby Yeah, I know there’s a reason. I’d like to hear it, now that I know I’m looting the house of a dead man.

  Betty Please don’t talk like that.

  Bobby Then tell me. NOW.

  Betty AHHHH! You’re right … OK?! Feel better? You are right about this …

  Bobby About what?

  Betty It’s old. I wanted to buy him a new one, was going to but he had all his … shit … on this one, you know how people can be about their own – he was always so particular about his computer and all his whatever, I dunno, his, his iPhone and …

  Bobby Yeah. And?

  Betty And he didn’t want it … I got him a gift certificate instead. I did that but I was going to buy him the one you mentioned … the Mac-something. Pro.

  Bobby OK. Fine. So why are you …?

  Betty Because, Bobby! Shit. Isn’t it obvious?

  Bobby It’s getting to be … yeah. GO ON.

  Betty There ended up being things … some stuff on it that wasn’t … doesn’t matter! Just things. Things all over this place that I want to get rid of. (Beat.) And that’s not all … I mean, God knows what’s up in that file cabinet that he kept locked for some reason … so … just …

  Bobby I think it does.

  Betty What?

  Bobby I bet it does matter. All this stuff.

  Betty Oh, for God’s sake! STOP! Just …

  Bobby No, I’m not going to …

  Betty Bobby!

  Bobby We’re gonna do this right now and I don’t give a shit what you think. You put me in the middle of this so here we go. You’re gonna tell me EVERYTHING YOU KNOW. NOW.

  Betty shakes her head – drifting a bit before she speaks.

  Betty There are files on there I wouldn’t want his parents – or anybody else, really – seeing. Emails from me and just other things. OK? (Beat.) A couple pictures … I also found out that – by peeking at a time that I shouldn’t’ve, when he wasn’t aware of it – I saw … things of his that were … other girls on there … He was friendly with many more people than I was led to believe. So that was another thing … my golden boy wasn’t as lovely and shiny as I’d imagined him to be. (Beat.) And then there was one more find, too …

  Bobby What’s that?

  Betty It was so simple … Just a few little bits of his diary … notes that he kept with all his thoughts and wishes and dreams …

  Bobby Yeah? And?

  Betty And I wasn’t one of them. I was – how did he put it? – ‘old’ and ‘expendable’. ‘OK in bed,’ he wrote. ‘Sex with her is kind of like fucking grey Jell-O.’ (Beat.) Ha! For so long I’ve been chased and wanted and – a prize … and now some boy, this second-year senior reduces me to nothing in just a few words … less than nothing. Jell-O. Well, you can imagine how something like that might take your breath away …

  Bobby … I’m sure.

  Betty I suddenly saw what it was like to become invisible. You know? To be seen through. (Beat.) I mean, I felt it coming. ‘Campus’ is not for the weak of heart, trust me. New, beautiful girls every semester, year in and out, and yet … I could still turn a head or two. You know, when I tried. Some make-up on and my heels or whatever, yeah. I still had a little something. But hey, college guys are easy, I suppose – looking to get laid and they don’t really care by who, so that wasn’t any great accomplishment. Still, didn’t hurt at eight a.m. as you’re walking across the lawn there. A bunch of guys whistle at you … It’s stupid, but it at least makes you feel alive or whatnot. Wanted. Even just for a second. (Beat.) So with him … this beautiful young guy who I find in my office one day, needs help on a scholarship application and he makes me smile and laugh and, and he’s … he likes my ‘hair’ … It doesn’t take long. To get sucked in. To believe in something, even if you know it’s probably not the truth. You want it so bad, need to believe in that illusion so, so much because it’s all you ever were – this pretty face and a girl who would say ‘yes’ – it’s not so easy to give that up. For it to pass you by. And so later, you’ll do almost anything to keep it, to hear it again just once. And from whomever. Kid down at the pharmacy. Some old man getting his coffee in Dunkin’ Donuts. That’s how pathetic ya get. Shit. (Beat.) But it does pass. Yes, it does and one day you are transparent. People walk by and don’t see you, they say, ‘Excuse me, Ma’m,’ and you just want to scream, you wanna grab them and shake them and yell, ‘I am a fucking beautiful, desirable woman,’ but you don’t. You don’t do anything like it because you’ve started to know, inside somewhere, you’ve begun to recognise the truth. You are not that any more. You’re just normal now and, and middle-aged and tired most of the day and everyone, from your husband on down, has begun to see right past you. Through you. As if you’re no longer even there. (Beat.) I’m not making any excuses here, Bobby, but I’m just saying. I’m saying that’s how it is for me these days, that’s all …

  Betty looks at him but past him, too. Lost in thought. Silence for a moment.

  And that’s everything, Bobby. I promise.

  Bobby Yeah?

  Betty Yes. That is the truth. As ugly and as, you know … terrible as it seems. That is what has happened. And why I’m doing all this.

  Bobby I see.

  Betty So now you know. (Beat.) I don’t care what you say … I gave myself to this boy. I believed in him. In us. (Beat.) I hadn’t done that in a long time. Trusted someone like that … and he … he said he was staying another year for me … so that we would … taking time to finish his thesis for me. So he could be with me, he said.

  Bobby I’m sure.

  Bobby doesn’t know what else to say but knows enough to keep his big mouth shut at the right moments.

  Betty He did! That we might – It seemed like he was offering me this whole new universe – but instead he shit on that … (Beat.) I know I did a lot of bad things to get here and so why should it work out for me, but I just … (Beat.) I did love him, Bobby. That is not a lie … I loved him and he was using me. I wasn’t ever going to be anything but a footnote to him. In the end. (Beat.) And then, just to make the entire thing pointless and painful and sad – this past weekend, on a beautiful afternoon … he was out biking and he died.

  Bobby turns to Betty and looks at her. Long and hard. He nods, thinking carefully before speaking:

  Bobby He was out biking …

  Betty Yes … around the lake …

  Bobby And he died.

  Betty He did. Yes.

  Bobby Oh.

  Betty shakes her head dimly. Lost in all of her thoughts.

  Betty They’re continuing to investigate … said they’ll be in touch, but … for now …

  Bobby I see.

  Betty So you never know. I can’t ask about it without people being suspicious …

  Bobby Yeah, you said that.

  Betty And his parents are coming – I told you all that, didn’t I? Did I?

  Bobby Yes … ‘tomorrow’, you said.r />
  Betty That’s right. I spoke to the father.

  Bobby Uh-huh.

  Betty And I wanted to give away a lot of this stuff – books and things – but we already talked about that.

  Bobby Yes.

  Betty So you know what I’m doing? Right?

  Bobby You want to get your things outta here before they show up. Before anyone can come over here and start – I get it. It’s understandable.

  Betty Is it?

  Bobby Sure. What good does it do for everybody if your relationship came out now? Right? It’s just sadness, that’s all this’d be, especially for his family. And yours.

  Betty Exactly! That’s what I thought, so I … That’s why I tried to get all the …

  Bobby You did this.

  Betty Yes. Came here after calling you up. I am trying to do a good thing …

  Bobby I get it now. I do … (Beat.) So just one more question.

  Betty OK. I’m getting tired, though …

  Bobby Just hold on. Just this. Tell me now – tell me one true thing and I will help you in any way I can. I promise … (Beat.) He died in the afternoon, you just said.

  Betty Yes.

  Bobby But before … before you said they didn’t know how. Or when. That it was …

  Betty No. I don’t think they do. Nope.

  He looks long and hard at Betty. The truth is just ahead.

  Bobby I see … (Beat.) Then how did you know it was in the afternoon? Betty? I mean, how could you possibly know that? Hmm?

  She stares up at him silently. Only her eyes blinking rapidly.

  Betty … I dunno.

  Bobby And I’m not saying anything here, I’m not some cop, but … if he did hit a bump or, like, some shitty patch of pavement out there or an animal, some fucking squirrel, a deer, whatever, jumped out in front of him – and maybe it did, it’s possible –

  Betty They think that’s what happened …

  Bobby Yeah, I heard that before, I did, but … if that was the case? How come it’s his back tyre that’s messed up now and not the front one? Why would that be? (Beat.) I want you to think about that …

  Betty doesn’t say anything – just keeps looking at Bobby.

  You didn’t scratch your car at the store, did you?

  Betty …

  Bobby Did you?

  Betty What?

  Bobby Betty?

  Betty I don’t know … I don’t remember now.

  Bobby Yes, you do. YOU DO KNOW.

  Betty I do?

  Bobby Say it to me and I’ll help you. Just come clean for one time – and I mean, with all of your stuff, the whole pile of fucking shit you carry around – do that and I can help you …

  Betty I’m … I’m not sure that … I …

  Bobby Say it.

  Betty … But …

  Bobby Come on!

  Betty I can’t … Bobby … I can’t do that …

  He grabs her by the shoulders and shakes her. Violently.

  Bobby Yes, you can! Say it, Betty. SAY IT TO ME NOW, GODDAMMIT! JUST SAY IT!!

  Betty Owww! You’re hurting me!! STOP!!

  Bobby Then say the fucking words!

  Betty No …

  Bobby SAY IT! SAY THE TRUTH OR I SWEAR TO GOD THAT I’LL …!

  Betty Stop it! Stop yelling at me!!

  Bobby Then do it! Come on, just do it!!

  Betty I can’t!

  Bobby Yes, you can, people can do anything they want, they do it all the time and so can you! YES!!

  Betty No, Bobby, stop it … stop!

  Bobby No! I’m not stopping this time, I’m not!

  Betty Leave me alone!

  Bobby Tell me the truth! Say what you’ve done!

  Betty No! Stop it, no!! I don’t know what I’m –

  Bobby lets go of Betty and goes to the door and swings it open. The rain pouring down.

  Bobby I WILL WALK OUT RIGHT NOW, WALK THE FUCK OUT AND LEAVE YOU HERE!! YOU WANT THAT?! HUH?! DO – YOU – WANT – THAT?!

  Betty … I’m …

  Bobby DO YOU?! IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT,

  BETTY?!

  Betty … I don’t know any more!

  Bobby Then fine. That’s … you know what? You’re on your own. Just how you like it.

  Nothing from Betty. Bobby slowly turns and starts to go out. At the last moment, Betty calls out to him:

  Betty Please don’t! Bobby! PLEASE!!

  Bobby (turning) … What?

  Betty Please. I’m not … (Starts to cry.) I need you. OK? I’m asking now because … I just really do need you. PLEASE. DON’T LEAVE ME HERE. I CAN’T … I’M … PLEASE DON’T …

  Bobby closes the door and turns back to his sister. After a long silence:

  Bobby So tell me then. Say it now. The truth.

  A long silence. Betty finally speaks up and breaks it:

  Betty I was never at the store. Or by … what’d you call it? The thingy there.

  Bobby Cart corral?

  Betty Yes. That. (Tries to smile.) … Bobby, I can’t … it’s so hard to be … I didn’t go to the store that day. That’s all I can say … is I didn’t …

  Bobby lets this soak in. He looks around the room, taking it all in. This time in the harsh light of reality. For a second it looks like the truth is too much to take. Bobby braces himself and lets the emotion pass. After a moment:

  Bobby So listen to me – I’m gonna pack up the rest of this shit and I’m gonna take it back to my place. Leave it in the garage.

  Betty OK.

  Bobby Did you hear me?

  Betty Yes. I think so.

  Bobby Betty, fucking listen right now! OK?

  Betty … I am. You’re taking it all with you. (Beat.) Thank you.

  Bobby Yeah, and I’m … tomorrow morning I want to see your car. OK? I want you to bring it over to my place and I’m gonna take care of those marks on it …

  Betty We can … But Bruce said we can always …

  Bobby Fuck Bruce. He’s not here now – you didn’t go to Bruce with this. You listen to me and do what I say, alright? Take it to my house tomorrow and I’ll fix it for you …

  Betty You will?

  Bobby I can sand that down and repaint it and I think it’ll be fine. You hear me? OK?

  Betty Alright.

  Bobby Yes? First thing.

  Betty … I will.

  Bobby You should go home now. Right now. I can do the rest and I’ll take the keys …

  Betty Really?

  Bobby Yeah. I got it. Just go.

  Betty I will, in a second. I just need to rest for a minute.

  Bobby OK. But hurry. You need to go.

  Betty But … if you do …?

  Bobby What? I can lock a fucking door. Promise.

  Betty No … the other. If you do that – help me – is it a sin, Bobby? Is it?

  Bobby stops and looks at her. A funny look on his face as he finally shrugs his shoulders.

  Bobby You know what? I dunno any more.

  Betty You don’t?

  Bobby Nope. I do not know that answer.

  Betty Well, that’s a first …

  Bobby Yeah, it’s true. I know a lot of shit, but not that one.

  Betty It’s not a commandment or anything, is it?

  Bobby Betty … I’m not even gonna check. I don’t know and I’m not gonna look into it right now … So …

  Betty OK.

  Bobby It is what it is. It’s me helping out my sister, that’s all I can see.

  Betty Thank you. Because I do need you … I do.

  Bobby I know you do.

  Betty Thank you … Bobby. Thank you.

  Bobby … You’re welcome, sis.

  Bobby walks over to where Betty is sitting. Stands above her. He reaches down and touches her hair. He brushes it slightly.

  Betty smiles. Looks up at her brother for a moment, then leans her head against his hand. One real moment finally passes between them.

  Bobby goes to the stairs and climbs quickl
y up into the loft. Grabs the file cabinet and hoists it up into the air and tosses it over the railing to the floor. Smash!

  The sound is deafening and Betty jumps. Looks up.

  Bobby comes downstairs, grabs it up and starts out the door. Scoops up the laptop on his way out.

  Betty … Bobby? Do you … you wanna at least know his name or anything like that?

  Bobby No. I don’t. I don’t wanna know anything about ’em. Alright? Just …

  She nods. A crack of thunder. The lights flicker and go out. The rest happens by candlelight.

  It’s OK, don’t worry. I can still see what I’m doing …

  Betty ’Kay. (Beat.) Hey, Bobby …?

  Bobby What?

  Betty The truth …

  Bobby Uh-huh? What about it?

  Betty It hurts … don’t it?

  Bobby Yeah, it does. It stings like a bitch. (Smiles.) That’s why they call it that …

  They look at each other for a moment. She nods. He exits.

  Betty sits on the couch. Turns to the radio and turns it on. Modern English is singing ‘I Melt with You’. She smiles lightly and closes her eyes. Puts her head back on to the cushion.

  Betty resting. Lights slowly fading. Music blaring.

  Silence. Darkness.

  About the Author

  Neil LaBute received his Master of Fine Arts degree in dramatic writing from New York University and was the recipient of a literary fellowship to study at the Royal Court Theatre, London. He also attended the Sundance Institute’s Playwrights Lab and is the Playwright-in-Residence with MCC Theater in New York City.

  LaBute’s plays include: bash: latter-day plays, The Shape of Things, The Mercy Seat, The Distance From Here, Autobahn, Fat Pig (Olivier Award nominated for Best Comedy), Some Girl(s), This Is How It Goes, Wrecks, Filthy Talk for Troubled Times, In a Dark Dark House, Reasons to Be Pretty (Tony Award nominated for Best Play), The Break of Noon, In a Forest, Dark and Deep, Lovely Head, Reasons to be Happy, The Money Shot, The Way We Get By and All the Ways to Say I Love You. He is also the author of Seconds of Pleasure, a collection of short fiction which was published by Grove Atlantic in the US and Faber and Faber in the UK.

  His films include In the Company of Men (New York Critics’ Circle Award for Best First Feature and the Filmmaker Trophy at the Sundance Film Festival), Your Friends and Neighbours, Nurse Betty, Possession, The Shape of Things, a film adaptation of his play of the same title, The Wicker Man, Lakeview Terrace, Death at a Funeral, Some Velvet Morning and Dirty Weekend. He has also created the TV series Full Circle, Ten X Ten and Billy & Billie for DirecTV.