by Arlo Arrow
When we finished, we high-fived and laughed. It was such a rush being able to play with Jeffrey.
“I wish we would have recorded that,” I groaned. “That was amazing.”
Jeffrey flicked a switch on the wall. “Got it,” he said. “I installed that button so I could just hit it with my elbow if I suddenly got into the groove of things and decided I wanted to record. I think I got all of it.”
He played back the tape and I got goosebumps. I had written a few of my own songs, but nothing like this. What we had played sounded like it was a few rehearsals away from being played in a concert.
“It sounds so professional,” I noted, listening to my music on the state-of-the-art speakers.
“We are professionals,” he reminded me.
I had never really considered that before. In a way, Jeffrey and I had more in common than we didn’t. If age was our only major difference, then maybe we could make the professional and personal relationship work.
“What do you think about it?” I asked eagerly. “Do you like the song?”
“I think you’re off to a good start,” he smiled. “I think you should keep working on it and develop it into a larger piece. Maybe you can come back next week and I’ll help you out with it.”
I didn’t want to come back next week. I wanted to come back tomorrow, and the next day. The music flowed out of me when I was with Jeffrey. I didn’t want that to go away.
“Listening to this,” I said, feeling emotional, “I can’t help but feel like we’re meant to be together. I’ve never made music like this with anyone else before. There’s something so magical about it all. It can’t be a coincidence that we reentered each other’s lives at this point. It’s like it was meant to be.”
He drank his coffee and nodded, not saying anything on the subject.
“I think maybe I could hang back on the first few measures and let you start by yourself. Then I could come in later, like— “
He played his own melody for me and I nodded in approval.
“Like that,” he said when he was finished.
I swallowed a lump in my throat. I was happy that he was enthusiastic about my song, but something had changed. He wasn’t looking at me the same way he did last night when we were in bed. He had gone into work mode, tinkering with his recording equipment while I was trying to share my feelings with him.
“Is something wrong?” I asked, hoping he’d tell me what was on his mind.
“No,” he said absentmindedly, tuning his violin.
“Do you think we’ll ever play this piece together?” I asked, fishing for an affirmative answer. I wasn’t looking for much, just a glimmer of hope that he wanted to take our relationship to the next level. I liked him too much to be a one-night stand.
“It’s too early to say,” he said. “Original compositions can take a bit of time to perfect. We’ll see where it goes.”
“There’s nothing wrong with us being together,” I blurted out, tired of speaking in euphemisms. “Age hardly means anything anyway. Who cares if some people don’t understand it? If we’re happy, that’s all that matters.”
He stopped plucking at the strings and looked at me. Finally, it looked like he was listening.
“Is something wrong here?” he asked, completely oblivious to the fact that I was getting ready to freak out.
I scoffed under my breath. Either he didn’t have any common sense or he was feigning ignorance. Here I was, telling him that I desperately wanted to be with him and he was playing over me.
Maybe I was coming on too strong. I mean, we had only shared our feelings for each other a day ago, and I was already dreaming of performing this piece together as a couple. Perhaps I was the one at fault here. Maybe I needed to slow down my frantic mind.
“Nothing’s wrong,” I lied, faking a smile. “Do you think you can send me that recording? I’d like to work on it at home.”
“Of course,” he said, going to the computer. I watched as he put the file on a flash drive. “Here you go,” he said, handing it to me with a kiss.
“I should probably get going,” I said, walking from the recording studio to the bedroom. “I don’t want Rachel to get worried. Besides, I should probably get out of your hair. I’ve been here for almost a full day.”
“I suppose you have,” Jeffrey said. “What a wonderful day it has been.”
“Yeah?” I asked, having a hard time gauging his reactions.
“Absolutely. When do you want to come back and work on your piece?”
“Oh, I don’t know,” I said, not wanting to sound too eager. “Maybe in a few days? I’ll let you know.”
“Okay,” he said, looking at the floor. “I don’t have much going on, so feel free to stop by whenever.”
I pulled on my clothes and grabbed my purse, unsure what to make of this morning. Maybe it was all too good to be true. I was confusing my fantasies with reality.
Before I left the house, Jeffrey pulled me in for a long embrace. I rested my forehead against his sternum, relishing every second in his arms. I wasn’t sure if it would ever be this good again.
“I already miss you,” he said, confusing me even more. There was such a disconnect between his actions and his words.
“I had a really great night,” I said, squeezing him a little harder. “You have no idea how nice it is to have someone to talk to.”
“I think I do,” he replied. “We make incredible harmonies together. I hope to see you very soon.”
We broke apart and I made my way out the door and into my car. I was just as confused as ever, but I wasn’t going to give up on him yet. I needed Jeffrey Knight and I got the feeling he needed me just as much.
Chapter 10
Jeffrey
The day after our incredible night together, Susan didn’t call. I know this because I did little else besides watch my phone, waiting for any sign of life. To pass the time, I went into the studio I hardly stepped into since I built it. I listened to the recording Susan and I made, almost feeling her presence in the room. When I closed my eyes, I could see her on the stool next to me.
Dressed in nothing but panties and my shirt, her thin legs were elongated by my shortness of my shirt on her. Her long, dark hair was pulled back into a high ponytail that swished around when she played. Her high cheekbones caught the light from the bright bulbs overhead, casting shadows on the hollows of her cheeks. As she played, her eyes sparkled with youthful joy. Her pouty lips parted slightly as if she were going in for a kiss.
The beep from my phone woke me from this dream. I turned off the stereo and raced to see whom the message was from.
I can’t come over tonight or Aunt Rachel will start to suspect something. How about tomorrow? I can’t stop working on this piece. I think you’ll like what I’ve come up with.
I grinned, relieved that she had been thinking of me.
I’m sure I will. I can’t wait to see you.
I sat back in the chair, letting my body relax. She would be back soon, and I’d have another opportunity to show her how much I cared about her.
As strong as my feelings were for her, I couldn’t help but be wary of the whole situation. I wasn’t great at relationships—my ex-wife was a perfect example of that. Susan needed a companion, someone to give her the love and support she needed. I had tried and failed miserably on more than one account. If I couldn’t be there for her when she needed me, I would ultimately make things harder for her than they already were. She deserved to be happy and I couldn’t stand in the way of that.
Still, I had to think of myself, too. Before Susan came back into my life, I hadn’t felt this good in years. In fact, I’m not sure if I ever even felt that good with Grace. I adored Grace, but she wasn’t Susan. Susan was fun and exciting. Grace was fun to be around, but we wanted completely different things. I wanted someone to support my work at any costs, and she wanted a family man. In the end, we just clashed.
If anyone could understand what I wanted in a
partner, it would be Susan. She was strong and independent. For as long as I’d known her, she was just a little bit stubborn. I didn’t doubt that she could take care of herself if I had to lock myself in the studio to rehearse.
Plus, the fact that she was also a musician also helped things. Grace liked my music, but she didn’t understand it. She simply couldn’t take part in it. When I thought about being with Susan, I imagined that we could spend time together in the studio. Maybe we’d even be able to collaborate.
I wanted to picture a future with Susan, but Grace’s shadow hung over every pleasant thought. If I wanted to make things work with Susan, I would have to find a way to shake her off, once and for all.
The hours dragged on as I waited for Susan to return. I played until my arms were tired and then when I couldn’t find anything else to occupy my time, I put on a few records and cracked open a bottle of whiskey.
As I lay in bed that night, staring at the ceiling, I counted down the minutes until Susan could join me. At some point in my countdown, I managed to finally drift off to sleep.
I had a dream that night that I was standing in the middle of a stage, the spotlight blinding me. I could hear the applause from the audience, but couldn’t see anyone.
When I began to play my violin, a song that I had never heard before came out. It was a mournful tune and I could sense that it was linked to some familiar feeling.
As I played, the spotlight faded and the house lights cast a dim light on the audience. When I could see out into the seats, there were only three people in attendance.
In the front row, was Susan, absolutely beaming. With her hands clutched to her chest, her mouth gaped open in sheer delight. Her head gently swayed to the song, feeling every intricate melody that came out of my violin.
However, about halfway back sat her parents. They stared me down with stern, disapproving looks. Their arms were crossed and they occasionally turned to whisper to the other. I tried to read their lips to figure out what they were saying, but every time I did, I lost concentration and screeching sounds came from the strings.
Upon hearing these horrible mistakes, Susan began to frown. This upset me more, which made the screeching even worse. Eventually, my playing was so horrible that she got up and left.
Just as she left, Grace entered, sitting in the front row seat. She had a smirk on her face as she watched my flustered performance. When I finished the song, she laughed.
I could hear Grace’s laughter ringing in my ears as I awoke from my nightmare with a start. I checked the time on my phone, looking for something to bring me back into the real world. It was a little past eight in the morning. Susan would be arriving sometime in the next several hours to relieve me of my anxiety.
When Susan finally arrived, I scooped her up into my arms and kissed her.
“I’m happy to see you too,” she said, surprised. She set her violin case on the table and wrapped her arms around me.
“You have no idea how slowly the hours went without you,” I said.
“Same,” she agreed. “I told my aunt I was staying with a friend tonight. Is that okay?”
“Of course, it is,” I exclaimed. “I thought we could spend all day and night between the bedroom and the studio.”
“You have no idea how amazing that sounds,” she said. “Where should we start?”
I didn’t even have to answer that question. She grabbed my hand and pulled me to the bedroom, pulling her dress over her head and tossing it to the ground.
“No panties today?” I asked, grinning. “You’re so naughty.”
“Then come punish me,” she replied with a wink.
We made love as if we hadn’t seen each other for months. In all our excitement, it didn’t take long before we were both collapsed on the floor.
“What was that thing you did with your tongue?” she asked, kissing my neck.
“It’s the perks of being an experienced lover, I guess,” I chuckled.
“I’m really glad I could convince you to give me a chance,” she said.
“So am I. I can’t believe how stupid I was being.”
“That’s all right,” she said. “You deserve to get everything you want. I’m just glad that I’m a part of that.”
“You think too highly of me,” I said, stroking her hair. “Shall we see what kind of beautiful harmonies we can create outside of the bedroom?”
We spent hours in my recording room, playing and listening to each other. I gave her my suggestions for her song and she worked quickly, taking in every word I said. Before we knew it, it was dark outside.
“Did we forget to eat again?” she asked, rubbing her growling stomach.
“I’m afraid so. Let’s order a pizza. One day, I’m going to cook for you. However, today is not that day.”
We spent the rest of the night like we spent every other day for the next two weeks: we had dinner together, drank wine, made love and played beautiful music. There was nothing else that we wanted to do, and no one we’d rather do those things with. The rest of the world disappeared when we were together. Life felt like it had meaning again after years of moping around at home. Susan made everything brighter and more exciting. I didn’t know how I ever went through life without her.
Susan and I grew closer together each day we spent together. We even ventured out into the world together, making quick trips to the grocery store or to a late-night movie at the theater. I was apprehensive at first, but we realized that no one cared. We were a mismatched pair, but we fit together so well.
Even though we had navigated the beginnings of our public life, we still preferred to stay at home. While the outside world had fresh music and delicious foods, my home allowed us a certain intimacy that we couldn’t get anywhere else.
For the first time in recent memory, life was perfect. Susan and I were in love and we made each other better musicians and better people.
Chapter 11
Susan
Jeffrey and I were in absolute bliss. I spent more time at his house than I did anywhere else. Day after day was spent talking about our lives and pouring our souls into our art. He knew absolutely everything about me and I knew everything there was to know about him.
I finally felt like my music career was back on track. I had taken two months of leave from the orchestra while I got my affairs in order. Initially, I planned on never coming back. Now, I felt nearly ready to rehearse and perform with the orchestra according to schedule.
Plus, Jeffrey and I started talking about performing together as a duo and potentially releasing music together. We had done a lot of work on our first song and it nearly felt complete. Since I already landed Jeffrey, my new daydreams consisted of standing next to him on stage, sharing our music with the world. That day was still pretty far off, but I wanted it to happen more than anything. Not only would it be a humongous boost to my career, but it would fulfill a lifelong dream of creating a professional partnership with someone I loved.
Even three weeks after we started spending time together, we were just as obsessed with each other as ever. I wasn’t sure if Aunt Rachel had caught on to my shenanigans, but I was basically living at Jeffrey’s house.
One afternoon after recording for a few hours, I stepped out of the studio to grab a glass of water.
“Jeffrey,” I shouted toward the back of the house, hearing the doorbell ring, “Did you order something?”
I listened for a response before remembering that the door to the soundproof room was closed.
“Ugh,” I groaned. “I guess I’ll pay for it,” I yelled futilely. The doorbell rang again as I dug through my purse for cash. I grabbed a wad of bills and made my way to the door.
I remembered I was dressed in nothing but a lacy bra, matching underwear and Jeffrey’s dress shirt, so I hoped the delivery person wasn’t someone I went to high school with. However, I looked damn good and was feeling as confident as ever so I opened the door wide to discover the last person I ever thought I’d
see.
“Hello, Susan Harper, is it? You’re very grown up now,” the woman at the door said.
I froze on the spot, unable to move or speak.
“Right,” she said coldly, “Is my ex-husband home?”
I managed to give her a quick nod. “Yes,” I squeaked.
My head was spinning. Even though they had been divorced for years, I felt like the Other Woman in the relationship. We had discussed Grace at length. I listened as he told me how much he hated her for taking the kids to Germany after a nightmare custody agreement. I told him how terrible she was to do such a thing to him.
On the other hand, he also told me all about their relationship while they were married. I knew they were happy for a time but things took a turn when they decided that they were just incompatible as a couple. It wasn’t anyone’s fault, but they just found marriage too difficult.
However, once the papers were signed, things got worse. Jeffrey said they would get into shouting matches that would last all night. One time, she even threw his violin at the wall. Naturally, the kids were upset which didn’t make things easier. After that, she restricted his access to his boys whenever she could.
I wouldn’t have believed it if Jeffrey hadn’t told me himself. I knew Grace when I was younger, and she always seemed pretty nice to me. She would always say hello if I went to their house for a lesson. My parents were fond of her too. I wasn’t sure what, but something changed in the years surrounding their divorce.
But, if I had to guess, Grace was not excited to see me. She was especially not excited to see me, the child of her former friends, in his home wearing nothing but his shirt.
“I’m going to go,” I said, the words falling out of my mouth as I leaned toward the door.
“Do you mind putting some pants on first?” she said casually. “Our children are in the car.”
I scurried off to the bedroom without leaving word with Jeffrey. I could hardly think about him at a time like this. He could fight his battles on his own. I needed to flee before I got involved.
