Drowning in Her Eyes

by Patrick Ford

  Susan knelt by her mother’s side. She cradled Marci’s head against her shoulder. “Momma,” she said, “I know you’re in great pain. For now, I cannot forgive you, later perhaps. Thank you for your blessing. We have arranged a short civil ceremony for tomorrow at City Hall so we can be legally married before we go away. I hope you will all come, too.”

  “Can you wait another day, Susan? Jimbo will be home tomorrow. I’m sure he would like to be there.”

  “I invited him already, in Vietnam,” said Jack, “when I saw him in the hospital. I would hate him to miss it. What do you think, darling?” After three long years, another day would not matter. Susan was happy to comply. “Jacqui will be happy to see him. She’s missed him too.”

  They deferred their marriage another day. In the morning, they met Jimbo’s train. He was excited about everything. He had been promoted and posted to a training role at Fort Benning. Sergeant James Baker would begin his new job later in the New Year. “And I’ll make sure your methods about squad commanders are ingrained in any men I train.” he said.

  There was a quiet luncheon after the service. Jack and Susan would be married again in a garden ceremony back at Ballinrobe. As they left the restaurant, Marci handed Susan a white envelope. “Now you have my chicken recipe, dear. Don’t spoil Jack too much with it!”

  They flew out of Boston the next day. Sarah drove them to Logan. Before they left, Susan had a long conversation with her mother. Susan could not forgive her mother just yet. However, they agreed to write. “You have a granddaughter to learn to love, Momma. Let us all take some time to grieve for our mistakes, for we are all guilty. Now I must go with my new family. Goodbye, Momma, God keep you.”

  * * * *

  At the airport, Sarah looked wistfully at the three of them. She said, “I am going home to pour all that gin down the sink, and I will never drink again. I know I can never have John as my husband again, but I can try to tear down the fences we built between us, and I will get Mom the medical help she needs. Goodbye. I love you all so.” She could bear it no more; she kissed them and quickly drove away.

  In Los Angles, they broke the journey to spend a day at Disneyland with Jacqui. The child was overjoyed at the sight of all her favourite characters, and ran from one to the other ceaselessly. Jack and Susan watched her, feeling their love in every small step she took, in every look of childlike fascination on her face. She slept well that night while her parents made love, and made love, and made love. In the morning, she joined them for a different kind of love.

  In the late afternoon, the Qantas jet lifted off and turned for Hawaii. Susan looked down and told them both about their long, slow journey across that ocean. “When I look back,” she said, “I believe that it was the part Daddy liked the most. For a ranch hand from Montana, he loved the sea. It gave him such peace and joy. He and Momma were so happy on that ship.”

  Chapter 12

  Homeward Bound

  Before leaving Australia, Jack had ordered a new car. Susan would need one and it had to be comfortable and roomy. It had a special seat fitted for Jacqui and, for the first time, an air-conditioning system. He had arranged to have the car delivered in Brisbane, so they could drive home in comfort.

  Denni and Duncan had already left for Ballinrobe, so they set out immediately. They climbed the Great Dividing Range to the city of Warwick. Susan could remember this part of her fateful bus ride to Armidale all those years ago. Then onwards to Goondiwindi they went.

  Jacqui was hungry so they stopped for some lunch. It was breathtakingly hot outside the car. The summer rains were yet to arrive. That was a good thing this year. The wheat crop was the best ever grown, and the harvest was still in full swing a week out from Christmas. Hot, dry conditions are best for harvesting, and the men were working through the night to get the harvest in. Jacqui had seen one of these big machines working as they drove by. “Look,” she said, “it’s eating all the grass!”

  While they ate in the coolness of the Royal Hotel, many people he knew acknowledged Jack. Most came up for a brief ‘G’day, Mate’ and a quick chat. They admired his ‘little Yankee shelia’ and his beautiful daughter. He was a hero to these people. The exploits of Captain Jack Riordan MC, MID, were widely known here. They soon headed out of town towards Ballinrobe. Susan was burning with pent-up emotions. How sweet it would be to see again this beautiful place. How wonderful it was that she would be spending the rest of her life here.

  Soon they turned into the entrance to Ballinrobe. It looked unchanged to her, except for a large grain silo around which men were working. She recognised Mick and Ollie. Mick threw his Akubra into the air and shouted, “You bloody little beauty!” The phlegmatic Ollie grinned like a cat with a saucer of cream. They began to move towards the homestead.

  Susan said, “Oh Jack!”

  Jack said, “Home at last.”

  Jacqui said, “Mommy, I can see a horsie!”

  * * * *

  They were waiting for them on the wide veranda in the cool of the garden—Helen, Denni, and Duncan and the little pink bundle that was Grace Helen McGregor. They were smiling, the two women crying at the same time. Sam was there too, almost beside herself with excitement.

  Helen came to them. She could see that the old sparkle had returned to Jack’s eyes. She embraced him and turned to Susan, hugging her for a long time. “Dearest Susan,” she said, “how good it is that you are home at last. Now who is this lovely little girl?” She knelt beside Jacqui and looked into her little face. Goodness, she thought, those eyes. How many hearts will she break?

  Jacqui looked at her gravely: “My name is Jacqui, I have got a new Daddy, and I saw a horsie.”

  “Yes,” said Helen. “There are lots of horsies here. You can have your very own when you are big enough. My name is Helen and I know you and I are going to be best friends. Do you want to see baby Grace?”

  Denni came down the stairs to display her baby. Jacqui was very interested. Denni embraced her brother. “Oh, Jack,” she said, “I’m so happy for you both. It must have been a horrible time for you. But you’re home now. Everything will be wonderful from now on.”

  Sam inspected the strange little creature her master had bought home with him, too. She had never seen a human so small. She looked at Jack then back to Jacqui again. She sniffed her; she could detect Jack there, so it must be okay. She put out a pink tongue and licked her arm. Jacqui patted her head. Sam was satisfied.

  They all exchanged greetings and excited chatter began as they all moved onto the veranda. Jack looked over his shoulder and noticed Ollie and Mick standing in the background. “Come on, boys,” he said. “Come and meet my daughter.” They rushed her.

  They talked far into the night; cold beer appeared. Ollie and Mick were included in the party, but Helen soon sent them home to their wives. “You are all to come for dinner tomorrow night. That will be the real party.”

  Soon the sandman worked his magic on Jacqui. Helen took her to a small room near Jack’s bedroom. She had spent a considerable time decorating it for a little girl. “This room is just for you, my darling. Mummy and Daddy are right here next door.” Susan prepared her for bed and she climbed in with Ollie. She kissed her goodnight. “Do you want to kiss Daddy?” she said.

  “Yes, and I want to kiss Helen, too.”

  * * * *

  Dawn was approaching. Here in the cool of the morning, they waited for the light. Jacqui, lifted from her bed in the pre-dawn darkness, slept on Susan’s lap. They were silent, absorbing the spirit of the land.

  Faint glimmers of daylight appeared. Then there came the riotous manic laughter of the kookaburras welcoming the new day, followed by the beautiful songs of magpies and butcherbirds. Soon the morning chorus was in full swing, with all the small birds joining in. The beauty of it all overcame them. As light crept into their world, the chorus died down to twitters and occasional calls as the birds went about their busy day. Jacqui was awake now, looking around her in awe. Susan said t
o her, “You were here before, in Mommy’s tummy. We gave your spirit to the land. Now you are back to claim your place.” The child was quiet. She looked around her, slightly puzzled. Just then, a pair of red-rumped parrots landed on the rim of the water trough.

  “Look Mommy,” she said, “see the pretty birds.” The parrots minced along the edge of the trough, dipping their beaks every now and then for a morning drink. They eyed the humans with little bobs of their heads and squawks of recognition. Then they flew off to begin their day. As they left, the noisy miners returned, at least forty of them. They swooped over the old Land Rover, chattering and squawking. ‘Welcome back’, they seemed to say, ‘welcome back’. Sam licked Jacqui’s face, and she squealed with delight.

  Susan leant against Jack in the front seat of the Land Rover. She said, “Jack, how I love you, how happy we will be here.”

  Jack looked into those lovely eyes. The thought of them had sustained him for three lonely years. Now, he thought, now I have truly drowned in your eyes. There I will dwell, forever and ever.

  Ten months later, Patrick James Riordan was born.

  Glossary

  AK47: Kalashnikov Assault rifle; manufactured in USSR and China

  Belah Tree: Australian native tree similar to a She Oak

  Bloke: Australian slang for any male person

  Brissie: Shortened name for Brisbane

  Browning: Browning 9mm automatic pistol

  Charlie: Name given to Viet Cong by American and Allied Forces

  CSM: Company Sergeant Major: In the Australian Army the highest ranking NCO in a Company, usually a WO2 ()

  Cypress Pine: Australian native tree with soft, easy to work wood, and resistance to termites

  Dekko: Australian slang: ‘look’

  Digger: Term of respect for an Australian soldier

  Dill: Australian slang: a simpleton

  Dogface: Slang for soldier in US Army

  Drover: Person in charge of a mob of travelling stock.

  Dust Off: Medical Evacuation (usually) by helicopter

  Earth Tank: Water reservoir constructed by digging a large hole in a watercourse

  Fair Dinkum: Australian slang: ‘The Gospel Truth’

  Galah: An Australian pink and grey parrot that usually gathers in large flocks

  Gunner: Term applied all members of the Royal Australian Artillery Corps

  In the wool: Sheep when carrying a full fleece, just before shearing

  Jarhead: Slang for US Marine

  Kelpie: Australian sheep dog

  Link: Name given to M60 ammunition belts; rounds are ‘linked’ by metal clips

  Long Paddock: See stock route

  Looey: Australian slang for Lieutenant

  M16: Standard rifle used by US in Vietnam

  M60: Abbreviation for GPMG-M60; the standard infantry machine gun

  M79: Grenade launcher

  Master Sergeant: American senior NCO

  MP: Military Policeman

  NVA: North Vietnamese Army

  OTU: Officer Training Unit

  Party Line: A single wire telephone line serving several subscribers. Each subscriber has a distinctive ring signal in Morse code

  PFC: US Army rank, Private First Class

  Pisspot: Australian slang for an alcoholic

  Purple Heart: Medal awarded to American soldiers wounded in action

  RAEME: Royal Australian Electrical and Mechanical Engineers

  RAR: Royal Australian Regiment

  RASC: Royal Australian Service Corps

  Red Ensign: Flag flown by British Merchant Ships

  RPG: Rocket Propelled Grenade

  RSL: Returned Servicemen’s League. Name also applied to clubhouse

  RSM: Regimental Sergeant Major, Highest ranking NCO in a Regiment, usually a WO1

  Royal Military College: Australian equivalent of West Point or Sandhurst

  Shearing: The process of removing the wool from sheep

  Shelia: Australian slang for a woman, particularly a young woman

  SLR: L1A1 Self Loading Rifle, the standard weapon of Australian Army in the 1960s and 70s

  Station: Name given to large grazing properties in Australia; ranch is the US equivalent.

  Station hand: Worker on a Station

  Stockman: Person who works with livestock

  Stock Route: Land set aside for the use of travelling livestock, sometimes called ‘the long paddock’

  Stunned Plover: Australian slang for ‘dumbfounded’

  Uni: Abbreviation of University

  Ute: Short for ‘utility vehicle’ evolved from a sedan

  VC: The Viet Cong

  Wallopers: Old Australian slang for policemen

  Wilga: Small Australian native tree, providing excellent shade for livestock

  About the Author

  * * *

  Patrick Ford

  I have lived in Goondiwindi, Queensland, for most of my life. I have been a farmer for most of this time, but also worked as a farm consultant and an accountant for many years. I have travelled extensively in North America, the UK, Ireland, Western Europe, Malaysia, Vanuatu, and New Zealand. I have always had a love of history, particularly military history. As a youth, I had an ambition to become a regular army officer, but commitments to the family farm precluded this.

  I have had a colourful and varied career. As a farmer, I learned about life and death, jubilation and sorrow, success and failure, from an early age, as I experienced good seasons and crops, but also drought, flood, fire, and market crashes. As a soldier, I learned about duty, commitment, and honour, along with planning and man-management. As a student of history, and a traveller, I gained important information and learned to appreciate different cultures. I am a voracious reader of both fiction and non-fiction and that, along with my life experiences, has delivered me a deep well of knowledge from which to draw my stories.

  I began writing in 2012 and my first book, Drowning in Her Eyes, reflects a part of my early life that has been imprinted in my memory for more than fifty years. It tells a story of young love, and the joy and sorrow it can bring. That part of my life did not turn out well for me, but I was able to gift to my characters the happy conclusion I did not have.

  I believe my story telling skills are enhanced by my passion to ensure my books are technically and chronologically correct, thoroughly researched.

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