Kate (The Dimarco Series Book 5)

by Jennifer Hanks

  I owed it to her, hell we all did. If she hadn’t been brave enough to go to Bear with the information she had, we wouldn’t have known they’d set the fire and he wouldn’t have been able to interrupt that shipment, causing their focus to shift.

  She essentially saved me.

  I was going to make damn sure I returned the favor.

  CHAPTER FORTY-ONE

  KATE

  Luke was acting strange. He was quiet and distant, his answers short when I’d ask him a question. He’d gotten a call in the middle of the night well over two weeks ago, and I just assumed it was work or his brothers until he cursed and sat up. I asked him what was wrong, but he told me it was a work thing and to go back to sleep before he left the bedroom. I heard him talking quietly in the living room, but I couldn’t make out his words. I wanted to go to him, but something stopped me, something told me he needed this time to himself, so I didn’t, but I didn’t sleep either.

  He left the next morning while I was in the shower, which was odd because he usually waits to have breakfast with Andy and I before he leaves. I looked for a note, but there wasn’t one and when I texted him, it was hours before he responded that he was sorry, he just had to take care of something. I told him I understood, but if I was being honest with myself, my insecurities were rearing their ugly heads and I was starting to worry. The distance, the short answers, and the middle of the night call felt all too familiar.

  I finished work on time and headed home, but I wasn’t in a hurry. I already knew he wouldn’t be there. He hadn’t been texting me very often, but every day he’d text and tell me he had to work late.

  Again.

  Unless he was babysitting for me on the weekends when I was working at Hanks, he was working himself. I’d allowed myself to get used to the texting and the calls, but more than that I allowed myself to start to depend on him, to trust him, and all of a sudden, I felt like it was three years ago and I was the fool again.

  I knocked on Lanie’s door and smiled softly when it swung open. She smiled wide. “Hey Kate. Come on in.”

  I nodded and followed her through the door, immediately looking in the living room for Andy, but he wasn’t there. “Where are the boys?”

  Lanie glanced over her shoulder while she walked. “Come have a drink.” I followed her into her kitchen and sat on a stool while she continued talking. “Jack picked the boys up about an hour ago and took them to the Burger Joint for dinner. He said Andy’s been talking about it, Bray too, so he and Anna were going to take them.” She turned with a bottle of wine and two glasses. “And Kate, honestly, I love those two boys, but a break sounded nice.”

  I chuckled because she was right, a break did sound nice. “That does sound nice.”

  She poured two glasses, lifted her hers and took a sip while I did the same. “Spill it sister, what’s going on?”

  My eyes widened over the rim of my glass at her bluntness, that wasn’t like Lanie. Pulling the glass from my mouth, I swallowed. “What are you talking about?”

  She raised her eyebrows. “Kate, I may not know you as well as I know Syd or Lucy, but I can tell something’s wrong.” She gestured towards me with the glass in her hand. “So, tell me, what did Luke do?”

  I set my glass down and rubbed my hands over my face. She reached out and touched my arm. “Hey, come on, talk to me. I’ll bet once you talk about it, you’ll feel better.”

  I dropped my hands and lifted my eyes. “I think he’s changed his mind.”

  Her head jerked back. “Changed his mind?”

  “About us.” I said quietly.

  “Why would you think that?”

  I sighed. “He’s never home, I hardly hear from him during the day, only to tell me he’s going to be working late or that after Andy’s practice he has to go to work. He’s just gone, well, silent.”

  “Maybe he’s working a big case. Jake said they hardly saw him for months a few times because of a case.”

  “And that would be fine with me, it really would, if he’d just talk to me, but he’s not talking. He got a call in the middle of the night a while ago and I asked him about it, but he blew it off, saying it was work. He didn’t sleep the rest of the night though Lanie.” I frowned down towards my glass. “He also hasn’t been, interested, if you know what I mean.”

  I looked up when she was silent, her eyes wide and I groaned. “I knew that was bad. That’s how Kurt acted when he was seeing another woman.”

  Kate shook her head adamantly. “No, Kate, do not think that about Luke. I don’t know what’s going on with him, but it’s not that. He would never do that.”

  I put my elbows on the counter and propped my forehead against the palms of my hands. “The last time we actually talked, like really talked, he told me he loved me.” I felt tears, but I swallowed them back before lifting my eyes back to Lanie. “How did we go from that to this?”

  She looked to the side and I could tell she was thinking. Her eyes flicked back to mine. “If he’s like Jake, you need to show him you won’t stand for the crap he’s been pulling.” She leaned forward. “You’re strong. You’ve proven that time and time again. Don’t let his behaviors take you back to a time when you couldn’t be strong. My guess, if you haven’t shown him you’re pissed off, he doesn’t realize it.”

  “I’m not pissed off, I’m sad.” I admitted. “And disappointed in myself for doing this again.”

  Lanie smiled sadly. “Andy’s sad too. I think Jack picked up on it when he stopped by this morning and that’s why he came back for the boys.”

  I dropped my head. “I thought I was hiding it well, explaining Luke had to work and that’s why he hasn’t had much time for him.” I shoved my hands into my hair. “How did I let this happen?”

  “You fell in love.” I raised my eyes back to Lanie. “So now, you can either give up or you can fight. The choice is yours, but the Kate I’ve come to know is a fighter.” She leaned close and grabbed my hand. “And no matter what the outcome is, you’ll always know you fought for what you loved.”

  I took a deep breath and let it out. “You should be a motivational speaker.”

  She giggled. “Nah, I’m not a fan of crowds. I’d probably pass out or pee my pants.”

  I giggled along with her before we sobered and I nodded my head. “You’re right.” I chewed the corner of my lip. “I just wish I knew how to even begin.”

  She looked away, again her face thoughtful before she smiled and her face turned towards mine. “What’s he adamant about when it comes to you? What’ll make him sit up and pay attention?”

  I shook my head, thinking back over our complicated relationship, but nothing stood out until I remembered the night we had our first and only date. I smiled at Lanie and she cocked her head, her face full of curiosity. “Moving.”

  She only paused a moment before she smiled wide and lifted her glass to her lips. “Sounds like you have some packing to do.”

  She came around the kitchen island when I smiled and stood, walking me to the door. “If you need help with any of this, call me, okay?”

  I faced her in front of the closed door. “I’m doing this once. If he doesn’t start talking to me, I’m moving on and doing what’s best for me and Andy.”

  Lanie smiled. “There she is.”

  She was right and I thought about that as I hugged her good-bye and walked to Luke’s house. I had been losing myself, my own strength in all the shit that had happened over the last few months and I needed to find me again. I’d been fighting and clawing my way out of the desolation my ex left me in and I wasn’t going to let anybody take me back to that place.

  Not a guy at a bar who wouldn’t take no for an answer.

  Not some bastards who burned down my house as a warning.

  And not Luke. Especially not Luke.

  I let myself in the house and shut off the alarm, pulling my phone from my pocket and tapping the corner against my palm. How do I text him that I’m moving? I shook my head and actu
ally laughed out loud. I wasn’t playing a game, I was me and I was going to be me.

  Me: I’m moving.

  CHAPTER FORTY-TWO

  LUKE

  I grabbed my phone off the corner of the desk when it sounded with an incoming text. I’d been pouring over shit I had on the Widows most of the day, trying to find something we’d all missed over the years, but I wasn’t having much luck. I’d been keeping tabs on Maggie through Bear and she was doing better physically, he said, but she still wasn’t talking to many people. Although today, he texted me and said for the last few days she’d spent some time with his sister. I didn’t even know Bear had a sister, but I was happy to hear she had a woman to talk to.

  I was pretty fucking surprised I hadn’t heard a peep from the Widows, but according to Bear they had their hands full in what could only be described as a war brewing. If Snake noticed that Maggie was missing, he either didn’t have time to deal with it or didn’t care. I’d bet my paycheck it’s the first one, knowing Snake would not like losing something he believes belongs to him. I’d also bet he thinks she ran away. I hope he continues thinking that way.

  I held my phone, eyes still on the papers in front of me and ran a frustrated hand through my hair. Sighing I pulled up my messages and froze.

  Kate: I’m moving.

  What the fuck kind of message was that? I hit the button to call her, but when she didn’t pick up, I shoved the papers back in the folder and put it in a drawer, before closing down my computer. I was out the door in less than a minute and in my vehicle.

  Me: You are not moving.

  I drove through the streets, cursing the work traffic, but still making it home in less than ten minutes. Pulling into the driveway, I got out and slammed the door, making my way to the house. I threw open the front door and there she sat at the kitchen island, my laptop opened in front of her.

  “What the hell are you doing, Kate?”

  She didn’t look up. “Looking at houses.”

  I put my hands on my hips and dropped my head, trying to reign in my anger. I thought we were passed all this shit and yet here I stand while she’s looking at house listings. I walked to the island and slammed the laptop closed, her head jerking up, eyes on me.

  “Why did you do that?”

  I ran both of my hands through my hair, frustrated. “You’re not moving.”

  She stood up from her seat and came around the counter to stand in front of me. “That’s not your decision to make.”

  My eyes widened. “Not my decision? What the hell do you think we’re doing here?”

  She threw her arms out to the side. “I have no idea since you don’t talk to me anymore.”

  I jerked back. “I talk to you.”

  “You say good morning and goodnight, that’s pretty much it.”

  I thought back and realized we hadn’t talked much, but I was working a lot and when I wasn’t working, she was.

  “I’ve been busy.”

  She rolled her eyes. “Trust me, I know.”

  I crossed my arms over my chest. “What the hell does that mean?”

  “It means, you work all the time! Not to mention, you get strange calls in the middle of the night, you hardly talk to me or Andy, and you’re never around.”

  My eyes widened. “So, you’re going to punish me by moving?”

  She lowered her voice, her fight draining some. “No, Luke, I’m not punishing you. I honestly wasn’t even sure you’d notice if I moved, that’s why I told you. I wasn’t even sure you’d care.”

  “Wouldn’t care?” I shook my head in disbelief. “Kate, I told you how I feel about you, told you I love you, that I want you and Andy.”

  “Those are just words Luke.” She whispered.

  And then it hit me. Like a fucking ton of bricks. Words meant nothing to Kate, they never have and I’d forgotten that. I dropped my arms and let them hang by my side. “You’re right.”

  She didn’t look happy to hear she was right, she looked defeated and I never wanted to be the one to put that look on her face. I stepped forward and put my hands on either side of her neck. “I know I’ve been working a lot and I’m sorry. Sometimes this happens.”

  “I understand that Luke, but you stopped everything. You haven’t even touched me in two weeks. I miss you. Andy misses you.” She paused. “And I’ve tried to talk to you, tried to get you to see me again, but it’s like you’re not here at all, even when you are. Does that make sense?”

  I closed my eyes. Fuck. She was right. “Yeah.”

  “Its all too familiar, that’s all. I can’t live through that again.”

  My eyes flew open. “Kate, I would never do what he did to you. You know that.” She lowered her eyes. She was doubting that too. “Shit. I really messed this up, didn’t I?”

  She didn’t answer and she didn’t have to, I could feel it. I leaned my forehead against hers and she sighed. “Talk to me.”

  I nodded and backed up, running my hands through my hair. I needed to talk to her, it was something I wasn’t used to doing, having always been on my own as an adult. I never had a person in my life to come home to, to share my day with, to help me forget about work.

  I ran my hand around the back of my neck. “I’ve been working on the MC case again.”

  She frowned. “I thought you said you handed that over to other people.”

  “I did.” I admitted. “but then I got a call that Maggie was in the hospital and I lost it.”

  “Maggie?”

  “The abused woman I told you about.”

  “Was that the call in the middle of the night?”

  “Yeah.” She looked down at her feet and I almost laughed at my stupidity. I moved forward and wrapped my arm around her waist, pulling her close. “You were worried it was something else?”

  “Yeah,” she said quietly. I tensed. I’d never given her reason to distrust me in that way. “I don’t think I would’ve thought anything of it if you weren’t so quiet and distant with me.”

  I laughed without any humor, her thoughts making sense. “Man, when I fuck up, I do it right, don’t I?”

  She laughed and averted her eyes. “You really do.”

  I squeezed her waist and her eyes came back to me. “No matter what Kate, I promise that is something you never have to worry about. There’s not another woman in this world that has my attention or has ever had my attention like you do. It’s you. It will always be you.”

  Her face softened, but the worry didn’t diminish. “Should I be worried you’re back on the case?”

  “No, baby.” I ran my hand through her hair. “I went to see Maggie like I always do and we talked about the danger she’s in, being an informant.” I leaned down putting my face close to hers. “She didn’t care. She was basically trading her life for mine. Said it was the one good thing she was going to do before she died.”

  Her eyes filled with tears. “What?”

  I smiled sadly. “Yeah. She said she wanted to repay me for trying to protect her all these years. At the end of the day, the information she provided to Bear has torn the Widows attention from me and towards their business.”

  “Wow.” She whispered. “What’s going to happen to her?”

  I exhaled a breath I didn’t know I’d been holding. “I set up a meeting that day and with Bear’s help, we have her in a safe place.”

  “Why did she agree to let you help her this time if she hasn’t before?”

  I rolled my lips together and looked past her shoulder.

  “Luke.” She laid her hands on my chest. “She did agree, right?”

  When I still didn’t give her my eyes or an answer, she slapped my chest. “Luke! You kidnapped her?”

  I dropped my eyes to hers. “We made it so she’s safe.”

  “Without her permission.” She said loudly. “Which is basically kidnapping.”

  “I’m protecting someone I care about who can’t protect herself.” I defended myself.

  Her eyes s
oftened. “I know. You’re a good man, you just go about it in bossy and pushy ways sometimes.”

  I grinned. “I wouldn’t suggest you try to leave me Kate.” I teased. “I kidnapped someone I care about, imagine what I’d do to someone I love.”

  She tried to stop her lips from tipping up, but she couldn’t and in the end, stopped trying. She wrapped her arms around my waist and laid her head against my chest. “Are you back? Now that she’s safe and you’re safe, are you going to let the others handle this case and come back to us?”

  I squeezed her waist and she stepped back, her eyes coming to mine and I smiled. “I’m back. And next time, if I get stuck in my head like I have these past two weeks, scream in my face, hit me, do whatever you have to do to wake me up. Because you can always believe me when I say there is no place I want to be more than with you. Losing you would destroy me.”

  Tears filled her eyes and she reached up, laying her palm against my cheek. “I love you, Luke.”

  I leaned my forehead against hers. “I know.”

  She slapped my chest and I laughed, leaning down to kiss her when the door opened and Andy flew in, followed by Cookie. With my lips pressed against hers, I whispered, “I love you baby.”

  Andy squeezed his body in between ours and looked up, smiling. “I lost my other front toof.” He held it up between his small fingers. “Pappy found it in my hamburger.”

  I laughed and bent down to pick him up, sitting him on my hip, wondering when the hell my dad convinced him to call him ‘Pappy’ and pulled Kate close to my other side when I heard her sniff. Cookie put his front paws on my leg, reached his head up and tugged Andy’s flip-flop, until he had it in his mouth and took off.

  Andy threw his head back and sighed loudly. “Cookieeeee.”

  He shimmied down my side until his feet hit the floor and reached up to grab my hand, putting my palm up. “Here hold my toof. I hafta get my shoe.” He started running, but looked over his shoulder and pointed his finger at me. “Don’t lose it. I need it for the toof fairy tonight.”