Death by Pumpkin Spice

by Alex Erickson

  “Strange how?”

  Jules shrugged. “Their house is like a funhouse. Or maybe one of those haunted houses you walk through this time of year, but it’s like that all year-round. It’s like The Addams Family come to life.”

  “Sounds intriguing.”

  “Oh, it is that, if nothing else. I’ve always wondered what it is like inside, and now I’ll get to see it. It is a shame about Howard, though. He was the one who was the most enthusiastic about the parties.” He glanced at his watch. “I best get back. Lance will be expecting my call.”

  I wanted to ask him more about the Yarboroughs but thought it best to let him make sure Lance wasn’t getting overwhelmed by enthusiastic toddlers. “I won’t keep you.”

  He gave me a startling white smile. “See you at the party!” He lifted Maestro’s paw and made the little dog wave before he turned and walked back to his house.

  Curtains in the house on the other side of me fluttered as I turned toward the front door. My nosy elderly neighbor was at it again, watching me like she expected me to do something horrible at any moment. I smiled in her general direction, fished out my keys, and let myself into my house where prying eyes couldn’t see.

  My orange cat, Misfit, was asleep on the couch. He glanced up at me as I walked in, then went right back to sleep, which was fine by me. I wanted to try on my costume and it would be much easier if he wasn’t weaving in and out of my legs, begging to be pet the entire time. I loved my cat, but he could be a handful when he wanted to be.

  I made it halfway to my bedroom when the phone rang. I immediately dropped the shopping bag and fished it out of my purse. Without looking at who it was, I answered with a near-out-of-breath, “Hello?”

  “Krissy? It’s Will.”

  “Hi, Will!” I tried not to sound too eager. “I’m glad you called. I just got home after buying my costume.”

  “Don’t tell me what it is!” he said quickly. “I want to be surprised when I come to pick you up.”

  That took a little wind out of my sails. “Okay. Are you sure you don’t want to know, just in case it doesn’t fit in with what everyone else will be wearing?”

  “It’ll be fine. Don’t worry yourself over it.”

  As if I could stop myself. “My friend Vicki is going to be at the party, too. Do you remember Vicki? She was at the bowling alley when we first met. Well, she co-owns Death by Coffee with me and is going with her boyfriend, who I didn’t like at first, but now I do, so I’m going to know a few people there. Oh! And my friend Jules will be there, too. He owns the candy store downtown. Do you know the one?” I stopped, realizing I was rambling.

  “That’s good,” Will said, humor in his voice. “I’m glad you’ll have someone there, other than me. Carl and Darrin will be there, so if you get sick of me, I’ll have someone to talk to.”

  “I’d never get sick of you.”

  “Good.” He paused and then heaved a sigh. “I only have a few minutes before I need to get back to work.”

  “Oh, okay.”

  “The party starts at eight, but most people will start arriving by seven thirty. I can pick you up at your house at seven if that works for you?”

  “Seven is perfect.”

  There was a short stretch of silence before he said, “I’ll need your address.”

  “Oh!” I flushed, thankful he couldn’t see me. I gave him my address, giddy. “I’ll leave the outside light on for you.”

  “Thank you.”

  “And beware of my next-door neighbor. She’s a bit of a snoop and will watch you the entire time you’re here.”

  “Noted.” He laughed.

  All my words dried up. I was really going to do this! I felt like a teenager again, and unlike most of the time when I felt that way, it was a good feeling. I couldn’t stop grinning.

  “Well, I best get going. Work calls.”

  “Okay.” It came out sounding a little sad.

  “I’ll see you on Friday, seven p.m. sharp.”

  “Can’t wait.”

  “Me either.”

  And with that, the date was made.

  3

  I frowned at myself in the bathroom mirror as I adjusted the deerstalker cap on my head. The Sherlock Holmes costume was plaid gray, very cheap, and very ugly when you got right down to it. It didn’t help matters any that I didn’t have a pair of shoes that matched the outfit.

  “What am I going to do?” I asked, glancing toward Misfit, who was lounging on the bed, watching me with detached interest. “Will is going to be here any minute and I look like I tripped and fell into an old man’s closet!”

  The coat—and I use that term loosely—was made of a flimsy material that wouldn’t protect me from the rain that was pounding the roof of my house with such force, it made the windows rattle. It came with one of those annoying short capes that only reached the middle of my back and was a little too stiff, as if it was starched or made of plastic. The cap was just as ugly and just as gray as the rest of the costume.

  The pants hadn’t fit, so I swapped them with a pair of black slacks. I added my white tennis shoes because when I’d tried my black flats, I’d nearly wept in embarrassment.

  Did it match? Not entirely. But it was the best I was going to be able to do.

  I picked up the magnifying glass that had come with the costume, considered it, and then dropped it into the trash. There was no way I was going to carry that thing around with me all night. If it actually worked, then maybe I would have found a use for it somewhere, but the “glass” was a cheap foggy plastic that was impossible to see through, making it utterly useless.

  I left the bathroom feeling like I’d screwed up the evening before it had even gotten started. This was supposed to be my chance to impress Will, and instead, I looked like an idiot. Maybe I should have gone with the sexy detective outfit instead. I doubted it could have been much worse.

  “At least I’ll have pockets,” I told the cat as I ruffled his ears. He closed his eyes and leaned into my hand, which reassured me somewhat. If the party was a disaster, at least he’d be here when I got home.

  “Do you think I’ll have time to find something else?” I asked, glancing toward my closet. There wasn’t an actual costume tucked away in there anywhere, but I thought I might be able to cobble something together if given the chance.

  I glanced at the bedside clock and, with a sigh, shoved my cell phone and a few other necessities into my coat pockets. This was going to have to do.

  I sat down on the bed to wait for Will, stroking Misfit all the while. At least he was being good tonight, which kept my nerves hovering right around seven instead of blasting to eleven. He could be a terror sometimes, but I loved him anyway, especially when he was calm like this.

  A knock sounded at the door after only a few minutes. I rose on shaky legs, gave Misfit one last ear rub, and then left the bedroom.

  The knock came again just as I reached the door. I opened it to a deluge. Will was standing on the front stoop, holding a rather large umbrella. I blinked at him, blinded by his headlights spearing through the pounding rain. It was as black as midnight out there, and wet enough I was worried about flooding. I hadn’t seen rain this hard in my entire life.

  “Ready to go?” Will asked. He was dressed in a black suit, open wide in the front, revealing a white button-up shirt. He held a cane in the hand not holding the umbrella. A white mask hid half of his face, and his hair was slicked back from that.

  “Oh my.” My hand fluttered to my chest. He looked absolutely dreamy. This wasn’t some off-the-rack costume he was wearing, either; the whole getup had to have cost him a couple hundred dollars, money I was finding to be very well spent.

  Will smiled, obviously noting my appreciation, which was quickly turning to a horrified realization that I was going to be walking into a roomful of people I didn’t know, right next to him, while wearing this.

  “You look fantastic,” I told him, swallowing back my uncertainty. This was no tim
e to chicken out. “If I’d known it was going to be such an extravagant affair, I would have chosen something different.”

  “Why?” Will asked. “You look stunning.”

  I blushed despite myself. “You’re just saying that so I won’t go hide under the bed.”

  “No, really.” His smile widened, which had the effect of causing his eyes to gleam. “It’s perfect on you.” He glanced back toward his car, which was still running. “We really should get going. The rain is going to slow us down.”

  I checked to make sure Misfit wasn’t going to make a mad dash for freedom, then stepped out under the umbrella.

  “Wet night,” I said needlessly as Will led me to his car. He kept the umbrella firmly over my head the entire time. The canopy was large, yet I found myself walking so close to him, I could feel the brush of his clothing against mine. He opened the car door for me, careful not to let the umbrella slip, and then stepped aside as I slid into a luxurious interior. He closed the door with the faintest of clunks before hurrying around to the other side.

  The inside of his car was like sitting in a spaceship. Lights lit up the dash, far more than I thought necessary in a car. A touchscreen display sat in the center of the console, telling me everything from the gas mileage—it was fantastic—to the air pressure of the tires. There were even Facebook and Twitter icons in the corner of the screen.

  Will opened the driver’s side door, slid in, and shook out the umbrella before closing it and tossing it on the floor in back with his cane. He checked the rearview mirror once to make sure his hair was okay and then put the car in gear. It was a standard, of course. I hoped he wouldn’t drink too much at the party and ask me to drive him home. I’d be utterly lost, having never driven a standard before.

  “It’s really coming down out there,” Will said. The windshield wipers swished back and forth in a steady, pleasant rhythm, yet almost as soon as they brushed away the rain, it was back again.

  “Storm of the century,” I said, unable to look away from the side of his face, which was covered by the mask. I swear the thing had been molded for his specific facial structure. It was perfect in how it lined his cheekbone, curved around his mouth. It stood out in stark contrast to his darker skin.

  “Phantom of the Opera, huh?” I asked.

  He shrugged. “All I had to do was buy the mask. I already owned the clothes, so it was a no-brainer.”

  My eyebrows rose at that. The suit wasn’t modern. The white shirt was the frilly type, but not so much that it looked silly. I had a feeling he had a pair of black gloves tucked away in one of his pockets. He looked as if he could have come straight out of the early 1900s.

  “How do you know the hostess?” I asked, needing to talk about something other than how great Will looked. “I hear she’s a little strange.”

  “That, she is.” Will laughed. “But she isn’t too bad, I suppose. I don’t know her personally. I’d mostly dealt with her husband, though we also take care of Mrs. Yarborough when she comes in.”

  “We?”

  He glanced at me before putting his eyes back on the road where they belonged. The dark skies and rain were making it hard to see more than a few feet ahead, which made me nervous. Anything could pop out of the night like a jack-in-the-box, deer most likely.

  “Me, Darrin, and Carl,” Will said. “We have a small practice in town with a few other doctors.” He paused, checked the lane, and passed someone going about ten miles per hour. “The Yarboroughs, like nearly everyone in town, come to us whenever they have the sniffles. Anything major is taken care of at the hospital in Levington. We all rotate there.”

  A sinking feeling rushed through me. I took in Will’s tailored clothing, thought of the expensive watch I’d seen him wear, and the car I was currently sitting in, and it all came together. No wonder everyone was so shocked I was on a date with him.

  William Foster was loaded.

  A low groan escaped my lips, which brought his eyes off the road again to check on me.

  “Krissy? You okay? You’re looking a little pale.”

  “Yeah,” I said, not feeling okay in the slightest. “I’m just nervous.”

  “Don’t be.” His eyes returned to the road, as did his smile. “You’ll do great.”

  People kept telling me that, but I was beginning to wonder. I could pull off hanging around people I knew, or even the people who came into Death by Coffee for a drink. How in the world was I going to play off being a rich man’s date?

  By now, we’d made it most of the way across Pine Hills and were actually in the hills themselves. Water ran down the road like a river, streaming by so fast, I was worried we might lose traction and get swept away. Will seemed to know what he was doing and hardly slowed as we took curves and hills fast enough to make my entire body tense. The rain was still coming down and showed no sign of letting up. It was as if it was intent on drowning every living thing and filling the Earth with water.

  Might be time to break out the trusty Ark.

  We turned into what used to be a driveway a few minutes later. I could see lights on atop the hill, illuminating the house, but I was afraid to take my eyes off what lay in front of us. The driveway was a slick of mud and running water. As soon as the tires of Will’s car hit it, they spun out. He shifted, gained traction, and carefully maneuvered us up the hill.

  “Looks like Margaret is having some work done,” Will said, voice tight.

  Orange cones kept us from driving off into the yard. A big yellow machine of some kind sat next to a few lonely looking trees. There was a pile of gravel next to the driveway, and I wondered if it was supposed to have been lain before the party. By the crunch I periodically heard beneath the tires, I could tell there was some down there, just not enough.

  “It was paved the last time I was here,” Will said, apologetically. “But the grade had always been poor. I knew she was going to need to fix it at some point, but didn’t know she’d started.”

  I nodded, almost too scared to speak. The driveway curved at too sharp an angle, back toward the house. Every now and again, Will’s tires spun, throwing up more mud, which had to be coating his pristine car. I glanced at the steering wheel and noticed the Lexus insignia. I wasn’t sure if the car had ever been so dirty, though the thought of Will standing outside, sans shirt, washing it was enough to get my blood pumping.

  It was starting to get warm in the car as we bumped over onto concrete. My eyes widened as I took in the gigantic house that loomed out of the rainy night like the Titanic. Lights burned in many of the windows, candles in many cases, though I couldn’t tell if they were real or not. A realistic-looking family of skeletons stood out front, bony arms extended toward the side of the house as if pointing the way. Will drove around, clearly knowing where he was going, and parked in a small parking lot.

  He shut off the engine and glanced at me. “Ready?” he asked, eyes pinched from the near-harrowing drive.

  “I’m not sure.”

  Seeing the mansion had brought all of my doubts roaring back. It was huge. Pumpkins lined this side of the house, some of them carved as jack-o’-lanterns. There were also a few little pinpoints of light hidden within them, as if there were tiny little monsters waiting to leap out and devour anyone who walked by.

  “It’s a lot to take in at first,” Will said. “But I promise that nothing here can hurt you.” He gave me a crooked grin. “Unless you count some of the stuffy old people we’ll encounter once we’re inside. They very well might bore you to death with their self-important stories if you let them.”

  I somehow managed a smile of my own. “I guess I’ll stay close so you can sweep me away if one of them traps me in a corner.”

  “I hope so.” His grin was infectious.

  Maybe this won’t be so bad, after all. I mean, I was with a good-looking guy who seemed to genuinely like me. There were quite a few people who would be jealous of me of all people! And who cared if a few stuffy old men were insulted by my presence. The
y could just get over themselves.

  There were quite a few cars already parked in the lot, but no one else was making their way toward the house just yet. Will reached back for his cane and umbrella, and then in one fluid motion popped it open as he pushed out the driver’s side door. I watched as he jogged around the front of the car, to my side door. He opened it with as low of a bow his umbrella would let him.

  “Shall we?” he asked with a smile. He held out his hand for me.

  With a grin of my own, I took it, feeling like a girl in a fairy tale.

  Hopefully, this story would have a happy ending.

  4

  “Ah, Mr. Foster and . . .” A man dressed like Igor frowned as he looked me up and down.

  “Kristina Hancock,” Will provided. “She’s my date this evening.”

  “Ms. Hancock.” Igor smiled at me, but it never reached his eyes. “Right this way.” He bowed and began to shuffle down the hall, back slightly hunched.

  “Don’t mind him,” Will said. “He hates these things almost as much as the rest of the help does. They’re in for a long, busy night without a chance for a break.”

  I nodded absently, distracted by the entryway into the Yarborough mansion. It was decorated like a movie theatre hallway with large, framed posters, lit from below by floor lights. Women with wide eyes gripped their hands close to their chests while giant monsters stalked toward them. Giant bugs, bloody murderers wielding weapons just as bloody, and hideous creatures were the order of the day, apparently.

  “Howard loved his horror movies,” Will said. “Fits right in with the Halloween theme.”

  That was an understatement. I hadn’t seen over half of the movies, and I never wanted to. I wasn’t a total wimp, but the last time I went to a scary movie, I ended up “watching” it with my eyes closed and humming to myself so I couldn’t hear the creepy music.

  We were led to an open doorway. What appeared to be intricate runes were carved in the frame, as well as the two large open doors. Fake spiderwebs hung above the doorway, and I caught a glimpse of a very real-looking spider in the corner. Beyond, the party was taking place.