In Search of Hope

by Anna Jacobs

  She smiled. It was lovely to hear that slow, gentle way of speaking. It took her back to the happy days when her father had been alive and they’d all lived in Rochdale.

  When her mother had remarried and moved near to London, Libby’s stepfather had forced her to speak ‘properly’ so she’d lost her own accent, except for what he’d called ‘that damned northern twang of yours’. And now she was back where she’d started from.

  Joss’s voice pulled her out of her memories. ‘What do you want to look at first?’

  ‘I usually compare the food prices, so I know which is the best value. I won’t buy straight away, if you don’t mind me taking my time. Afterwards, if you’re not in too much of a hurry, we’ll go and look round a few charity shops in the same way. Checking things out first.’

  She waited for him to say something, but he didn’t, because he’d suddenly lunged sideways. Grabbing Ned’s arm, he pulled the little boy out of the way of a large woman who was so busy talking to her friend that she didn’t seem to have noticed the child and would have bowled him over.

  ‘Thanks for protecting him.’ She took Ned’s hand more firmly.

  ‘My pleasure,’ Joss said.

  As they explored the market, he became thoughtful. ‘Some of the food looks super-fresh and it’s really good value.’

  ‘You probably don’t need to count pennies.’ She eyed some strawberries regretfully.

  ‘No, but it’s good to support the smaller sellers sometimes, even though the big supermarkets are very convenient. I’ve no need to rush in and out after work these days, after all. Do you want to look at the charity shops before you buy your food? Then we won’t have to carry bags of vegetables around.’

  ‘Yes, please.’

  They wandered out into Yorkshire Street, heading uphill. Libby investigated several shops and also a store whose windows bore garish posters screaming about its low prices.

  When they got to the top of the shopping area, she turned back. ‘I’m ready to start buying now, but if there’s something else you need to attend to, just say.’

  ‘We’ll do your shopping first. I’ll pick up some things from the market too. After that I need to see Henry about releasing the money for a car.’

  The words escaped before she could stop them. ‘What would I have done without you?’

  ‘Hey. Not only am I a trustee, so it’s my duty to help you, I’m a normal human being and I like to help my friends.’

  ‘Friends? Can you make friends with someone this quickly?’

  ‘Sometimes.’ He stopped moving to look at her solemnly. ‘As I think you and I have done. Or don’t you feel that?’

  She flushed, but could be no less honest. ‘Yes, I do feel we’ve become friends.’

  ‘Good. Now, if you just let me phone Henry to check when he’ll be available, I’ll hold on to this young scamp while you go back into whichever shops you need to visit to try on your clothes.’

  He got through to Mrs Hockton and arranged to see Henry just after lunch. As he closed up his mobile phone and slipped it in his pocket, he said, ‘That means I’ve got time to buy us lunch. I know a place which makes the very best pizzas, sold by the piece.’

  ‘You can’t keep feeding me,’ she protested.

  He grinned. ‘Oh, it’s Ned and me who need feeding. You don’t seem to eat much at all.’

  She gave in to temptation. ‘I’ve been too worried to eat properly, but I’d love some pizza. I’ll pay my share, though.’

  ‘I’d rather you kept feeding me home-made cake in return.’

  That made her feel better, less of a charity case. He had definitely enjoyed her cake.

  ‘Now, let’s get on with this shopping, Libby.’

  She always bought carefully, but she was particularly lucky today and found several garments she liked, as well as a few clothes and toys for Ned.

  In the markets she stocked up on fresh fruit and vegetables, as well as a range of spices.

  ‘You enjoy curries?’ Joss asked.

  ‘I used to. Steven didn’t. He preferred what he called real English food. Oh, damn! I’m doing it again, talking about him.’

  ‘You’re bound to. You’ve only been away from him for a few days. It doesn’t worry me. As well as making cakes, could you show me how to make a curry or two? I love them but it takes too long to go into Rochdale or Todmorden to buy a take-away. The food is cold before I get home again.’

  ‘I’d be happy to teach you.’

  After lunch, they parked outside Henry’s rooms and Joss went inside, not expecting to be more than a minute or two.

  ‘Go straight through,’ Mrs Hockton said. ‘He’s expecting you. Everything all right?’

  ‘More or less. There’s been no contact from her husband, at least.’

  ‘No.’ She lowered her voice. ‘And if he comes in here I shall be hard put to speak civilly to him. That was a bad bruise on her face.’

  ‘I’m first in line for a confrontation. Did you know he’d hit the boy as well?’

  The fury on her face was similar to his own feelings every time he saw the bruises on her face, and on Ned’s leg.

  He went down the corridor to find Henry scowling at a desk covered in piles of paper.

  ‘What’s so urgent, Joss?’

  ‘Libby’s car has died. We need to buy her a new one.’

  ‘Fine by me, as long as we keep the car in the name of the trust, so that he can’t take it if he drags her back.’

  ‘She’s not going back to him.’

  ‘You can’t be sure about that.’

  ‘I am. Very sure.’ He wouldn’t let her. As a police officer, he’d failed to prevent some women going back. As a friend, he was going to make sure Libby didn’t get forced back.

  ‘What if he gets custody of the boy? On the face of it, he’s a respectable executive and she doesn’t even have a job. Courts have done stupid things before. She might feel obliged to go back to him for her son’s sake.’

  Joss groaned. ‘Thanks, Henry. You’ve just given me something to have nightmares about. You have to make sure he doesn’t get to her through the law.’

  ‘And you have to keep an eye on her safety. You’ve nothing else to do, after all.’

  ‘It’s bad timing because I’ve just found myself a part-time job, one that’ll take me away sometimes. I thought we’d give her your address, and I know a couple of guys in the village who’d protect her, too.’

  ‘What’s the job?’

  ‘Security.’

  ‘And that means …?’

  ‘Oh, this and that.’

  ‘I see. Something hush-hush.’

  ‘That’s one way of putting it.’

  ‘Well, let me know whenever you go away. Emma and I would be happy to give her shelter at our house any time.’

  ‘I knew that already. You’re one of the good guys, Henry.’

  His old friend rolled his eyes. ‘My work usually involves house sales and contracts. This goes way beyond my normal brief. Only for Rose would I have done any of this.’

  ‘I know. You like a quiet, elegant life: concerts, art galleries, cultural holidays. You don’t usually do divorces, even. Are you going to help her with that?’

  ‘I’ve made arrangements for a good divorce lawyer to get involved once Libby starts proceedings. I know my limitations. We have to tread very carefully with this.’

  ‘Anyone I know?’

  ‘Annie Bainborough.’

  ‘She’s the best around here. She does pro bono work for the abuse unit.’

  ‘I know. About this car. You’ll have to choose it, Joss. I’m no expert on second-hand cars.’

  ‘I’ve already got Giff Marshall looking into it. He’s a mechanic who lives in Top o’ the Hill and is semi-retired. How much can we spend? I don’t want her driving around in another old rattletrap. It’s a miracle that one even got her here.’

  ‘Miracles do sometimes happen. And spend whatever it takes to get a decent second-hand
vehicle with all the necessary safety features – two or three years old maybe.’

  Joss was smiling as he went outside again. He was enjoying today’s outing and things were going really well.

  Then he stiffened. Libby and Ned weren’t in the car. He could feel himself going on what he’d always thought of as ‘full alert’. He stared up and down the street, while getting out his mobile, in case he had to call for help quickly, his mind skipping from one possibility to another.

  Where could she have gone? She’d assured him she’d stay in the car. He’d only given her the spare car key in case she wanted to listen to the radio.

  Could her husband have come after her already?

  Before he could dial for assistance, Libby appeared at the corner, with Ned walking beside her. She speeded up when she saw him.

  ‘Sorry to keep you waiting, Joss. Ned was getting a bit fidgety. I locked up the car, so it wasn’t in any danger of being stolen.’

  ‘It’s you I was worried about, not the bloody car.’ It surprised him how upset he’d felt.

  ‘I’m really sorry to have worried you. I don’t know what I was thinking to walk off like that.’

  ‘I was afraid your husband might have turned up.’

  ‘You think he could snatch us off the street without me screaming my head off?’

  ‘Could happen. Do you think he’d try that?’

  She bent her head, then looked up and nodded. ‘Yes, after the way he beat me, I do think he would. It was probably stupid of me to go for a walk in such a quiet area. And I was out of earshot, so you couldn’t have helped me.’

  ‘Not your wisest move … Don’t do it again, or you’ll turn my hair white.’

  ‘If I manage to last the six months and get the money, I should probably move on, change my name and never, ever let him know where we are. Only he’ll go for access, I know he will.’

  ‘We have the photos of what he did to Ned.’

  ‘Will a judge consider that enough to separate him permanently from his son?’

  ‘Not necessarily. Even if it’s supervised access, they usually try to keep parents and children connected.’ Joss sighed. Everyone involved in family law did their best, but sometimes a bad ’un got through the safety nets, and then innocent people suffered.

  Libby echoed his sigh. ‘I wonder if it’ll ever end, if I’ll ever be really free.’

  He wondered that, too. He knew of a case where an abusive husband had tracked down and killed an ex-wife years after she’d left him, but he didn’t say that. He was still trying to come to terms with the realisation that he cared enough about Libby to get upset as quickly as he had a few moments ago at the thought she might be in danger.

  She put her hand on his arm, tentatively, as if afraid he might shake her off. ‘I won’t do it again. I’m sorry to have worried you.’

  He took her hand in his. ‘Don’t keep apologising. I’m not angry with you; I’m angry with the situation. You shouldn’t have to hide and worry like this. No one should have to do that.’

  When they got home, she thanked him for his help and went to put her purchases away. It gave her great pleasure to unpack her new clothes. She held them in front of her as she stood before the full-length mirror. She’d also bought a couple of pairs of new jeans from the market.

  As she went downstairs again to prepare tea, she realised that the house was beginning to feel like home. It really was.

  That evening she phoned Allie and invited her round one evening for a drink and a natter.

  ‘Not tomorrow, but the day after!’ Allie said at once. ‘Pete’s going out for a drink with the lads tomorrow. His Sunday treat.’

  A voice called out from a distance. ‘He said to say hi. He may never have met you, but he’s heard about you.’

  ‘Say hi back to him. I’ll see you on Monday. About seven-thirty all right?’

  ‘Great. I’ll walk up so we can have a drink or two.’

  ‘But you’ll have to walk back on your own after dark.’

  ‘I never feel afraid up here. Anyway, once I get to the end of your little lane, I’m never out of screaming distance of someone, if I need help.’

  Libby couldn’t have done that, walked back in the dark. Not with Steven on the loose.

  It made her angry that she felt that way; that she was so afraid of him.

  Eight

  On Sunday, Joss worked on clearing things out of his attic. He caught glimpses of Libby and Ned, but didn’t go out to chat with them.

  By evening, he’d had enough of housework and decided to take Pete up on his standing invitation to join a few of the lads for drinks. He’d gone out with them a few times before, but wasn’t a regular.

  He had an ulterior motive: he wanted to find other guys who’d be ready to help Libby if her ex turned up.

  But that wasn’t his only reason for going out. He was feeling more sociable these days, didn’t know why he’d been so determined to live a solitary life. The Crown was a nice little pub, genuinely old, needing no fake beams or pretend inglenook fireplaces to make you feel at home there. And Pete’s friends were a pleasant lot, men of all ages from the village and neighbouring farms.

  He might even get a game of darts. It had been ages since he’d played.

  On the Monday, various tradesmen turned up to see Joss, the first at eight o’clock. Libby couldn’t resist peeping out of the front-room window each time. Their vans said they were bathroom specialists, plumbers, electricians. She was intrigued. Was he planning some major renovations?

  She’d made a good start clearing out the front room yesterday, but wanted to finish it today so that she and Allie could sit there in comfort for their girls’ evening.

  The main problem now was Grandma Rose’s ornaments. There were dozens of them, none of which Libby liked. They were not only lined up along the mantelpiece and window sills, but jostled one another in an old-fashioned display cabinet. She wasn’t into fussy décor and these were the kind of pieces her grandmother’s generation had liked – no, her great-grandmother’s generation or even earlier. Some of them looked really old.

  Picking them up one by one, she studied the marks underneath. She’d watched enough antique shows on television to recognise some of the makers and had to wonder if any of the ornaments were valuable enough to sell. She might not have the right to do that, though, not if she had to run away to escape from Steven before the six months’ condition of her inheritance was fulfilled.

  Should she go and ask Joss about the ornaments?

  No, she couldn’t keep pestering him.

  But who else was there to ask? And he was a trustee.

  Oh, don’t be such a coward, she told herself. It’ll only take a couple of minutes to nip next door and ask. She checked that there were no vans outside Joss’s house, then called for Ned to come with her.

  He came running, an eager look on his face. ‘Are we going to see Joss?’

  ‘Yes. Let’s look at your hands. Ooh, I think we’d better wash those before we go.’

  When her neighbour opened the door, he looked happy and relaxed. For a moment, the breath caught in her throat at how attractive he was in an understated way. Well, she found him attractive. Very.

  How long was it since she’d even looked at a man in that way, let alone reacted to one? She wasn’t free, though, shouldn’t be doing this. Pulling herself together, she asked as calmly as she could, ‘Have you got a minute, Joss? I need to ask you something about the trust.’

  ‘Of course I’ve got a minute. Two, even. Come in. Would you like a coffee?’

  ‘I didn’t mean to disturb you. You’ve been so busy all morning.’

  He beamed at her. ‘I’m putting in an en-suite bathroom on the top floor and making that the master bedroom. I’ve been meaning to do it for ages and I suddenly decided the time had come.’

  He led the way into the kitchen, which seemed a lot more cheerful by daylight than it had the night she arrived.

  ‘Milk for Ne
d?’ he asked.

  ‘Just a glass of water, if you don’t mind.’

  ‘I’ve got fruit juice.’

  ‘No, water will be fine. I don’t want to encourage a taste for sugary drinks.’ Nor did she want to spend money on expensive drinks when tap water was free.

  ‘Do sit down. Remind me how you like your coffee.’

  ‘Milk, no sugar.’ She sat down at the end of the table and looked round. Joss must have been making a drink for himself because the jar of coffee was already out, and a mug stood next to the kettle with a spoon handle showing and steam rising from it.

  The coffee smelled good. Steven sneered at the mere idea of instant coffee and had bought himself an elaborate coffee-making gadget, which she hadn’t been allowed to touch. She didn’t think it was worth all the fuss, but of course she hadn’t said that.

  Her ex would have scorned all sorts of things about her new life, but she was enjoying the peace she’d found here, even if it was only temporary.

  Just as Joss was putting a mug down in front of her, the phone rang. He got up to look at the caller ID. ‘Ah. Would you mind me taking this call? It could be important.’

  He took her agreement for granted and walked out into the front room, closing the door behind him.

  She looked round, seeing a room that was untidy but not dirty, filled with the paraphernalia of daily life. There was a pile of brochures on the table and she leaned over to look at them. Renovations and bathrooms. She would have loved to do what he was doing. Perhaps one day.

  That made her smile. A few days ago, she’d run away on borrowed money, unsure of whether she’d have a roof over her head that night. Now she was getting grandiose ideas about modernising her grandmother’s old house. Get real, Libby!

  The door to the front room opened and Joss came back into the kitchen. ‘Sorry to leave you like that. It was about my new job. How can I help you?’

  He hadn’t told her any details about the job, so she didn’t like to ask him. ‘Um, I’m trying to clear out the front room and I wondered what I’m supposed to do with Grandma Rose’s ornaments. There are an awful lot of them and they’re not at all to my taste. Some of them seem quite old, though, and I’ve watched enough antiques shows to know they might be valuable, so I don’t want to just give them to a charity shop.’