by Alexa Riley
“She’s keeping it small and intimate for just that reason. But everybody who knows and loves her has always been aware this Christmas Eve would come. It’s her thing. She thinks waking up as a wife for the first time on Christmas Day will be magical or something. She’s a pretty hopeless romantic.”
“And you’re not?”
“Not anymore.”
The flat way she said those two words left no doubt she’d had her heart badly broken, and it killed him to know it had been him who’d done it.
“When are they arriving?” he asked, not wanting to go back to talking about how much he’d hurt her.
“Brittany’s supposed to get in really, really late tomorrow night and Kate will be here on the early side Saturday morning. They’ve always been that way. Brittany’s a night owl and Kate’s an early bird. Anyway, how is your family doing?”
His stomach clenched, the way it always did when somebody he hadn’t seen in a long time asked about his family. He didn’t want to spoil the small amount of time he had left with Del, so he kept it simple. “They’re doing well. Business is good.”
“I’m glad to hear it. I always liked them.”
When she took a drink of her coffee, tipping the cup in such a way it was obviously the last of it, Brendan’s stomach tightened. She’d agreed to give him one cup’s worth of time and that time was up. He finished his off since he wouldn’t push her to stay if she wanted to leave. But that didn’t mean he wouldn’t try.
“You want another?”
She looked at him for a long moment, her pretty green eyes not giving up whatever thoughts were running through her mind. Then she shook her head and his chest started to ache. “I’ve got pajamas and a book waiting for me.”
He stood and returned the mugs to the counter while she threw away the cookie wrappers and napkins. Then he fell into step beside her, not wanting to say goodbye to her in the middle of a coffee shop in front of a woman who had nothing better to do than watch them. “I’ll walk you to the elevators.”
She smiled and didn’t refuse the offer, so he walked with her into the lobby. There were a lot of people around and, judging by their attire, a lot of them were there for the fights. He thought he saw Janie and Corey in the distance and turned his face so there could be no chance of eye contact, hoping nobody else was around. He’d already felt his phone buzz half a dozen times with what were probably text messages from his manager or trainer. Probably from both. They wouldn’t be happy he’d fallen off the radar the night before a big fight, but he didn’t care.
“Are you happy, Del?” he asked. Besides not wanting to miss the unexpected opportunity to see her again, he was there to finally learn the answer to the question that had been haunting him for years.
“I’m not crying myself to sleep thinking about you every night, if that’s what you’re asking.”
“Of course not. I just...leaving you was the hardest thing I’ve ever done and the only thing that got me through it was knowing that, once you got past our breakup, you’d find somebody who could make you really happy. You deserved that.”
“You made me happy. And my family would have grown to like you once they got a chance to really know you like I did. They never would have made me choose between them and you.”
He couldn’t tell if she was deliberately avoiding answering his question, but at least she didn’t seem to be in a hurry to get away from it. It wasn’t a very long walk to the elevator bank, but they were walking so slowly, if they moved any slower, they’d be standing still. Despite that, he was running out of time. “You’re not wearing a wedding ring.”
“I’m not married.” She sighed, giving a small shrug he caught in his peripheral vision. “I’ve dated some great guys and had a couple of serious relationships, but none of them were quite right.”
His emotional response to that could only be called conflicted. It would have killed him to know there was some lucky guy waking up beside her every morning, sharing her life with her. But part of him couldn’t help feeling all the pain he’d put them both through had been for nothing if she hadn’t moved forward in her life.
They reached the elevators and after hitting the button, she turned to face him. “I’m glad I ran into you, Brendan. I guess I never really had closure on our relationship and it was good to talk, even if I’m not sure it really helped. I think it would have been easier—or at least made more sense—if you told me you’d fallen for somebody else.”
“There was nobody else. There still isn’t.” He’d given up hope there ever would be, though he’d tried to make a go of a few relationships. None of them were Del. “I’ve thought about you every day, wondering how your life is going.”
“But you never called to ask.”
He sucked in a breath, thinking of all the times he almost gave in and called her just to hear her voice. One time, after he’d had a few drinks, he’d tried but it had been two years and she must have gotten a new number because the woman who answered had never heard of her. He could have reached out to her parents, or to Kate or Brittany, but he didn’t. In the light of day, he’d convinced himself all over again it was best he leave her alone.
“I’m sorry, Del. I’ve never been more sorry about anything in my life than I am about the way things ended between us.” Or that he’d ended their relationship at all, but again, he didn’t want to push. He’d made his choice and even though it had been the wrong one, he had to live with it.
“I hope you win your fight tomorrow night.”
“Thanks. Win or lose, it should be a good show, at least.”
As the control panel dinged and the doors slid open, a few guys slid by Del and stepped into the empty car. They were loud and he watched the uncertainty on her face. The elevators could be notoriously slow, but he could see that she didn’t like the idea of being alone with four men who’d obviously been drinking. And neither was he.
Brendan took her hand and stepped into the elevator. The button for the thirty-fourth floor was already lit up and when she sighed and didn’t reach for the panel, he realized she and the guys were all on the same floor. He turned his back to them as the doors slid closed and squeezed her hand.
They rode in silence as the men laughed and rehashed their wins and losses for the evening. Mostly losses from the sound of it, but the liquor seemed to have made having less cash and no women more fun than usual.
When the elevator car settled and the door slid open, he and Del stepped into the hallway and she nudged him to the left. The men followed and he guided her to one side so they could go by. She didn’t let go of his hand and didn’t tell him she didn’t need him to walk her to her door, so he went with it. Goodbye would come soon enough.
“Those guys were wearing T-shirts with your name on them but they didn’t even notice you in the elevator,” she said quietly when the men were far enough ahead so they wouldn’t hear her over their own voices.
“I’m telling you, it’s the beige sweater.” He chuckled. “It’s a great disguise, especially since none of my ink is above the neckline.”
She stopped suddenly and since there was no way in hell he was letting go of her hand until she let go first, he stopped, too. “Oh, I meant to ask you about the ink, since I saw the tattoos on the poster of you.”
“Yeah. I’ve got a few.”
“Since when? You never talked about wanting a tattoo before.”
“I got the first one after my first fight. Then I got a few more.”
“Huh.” She started walking again. “What are they?”
“Mostly just abstract stuff.” He didn’t want to talk about the ink with her. Especially not tonight.
A few doors later, she stopped walking again. “This is mine.”
But she didn’t let go of his hand. “I was hoping you’d forget your room number and we could just wa
lk around all night.”
She smiled. “I’ve missed you, Brendan.”
“I’ve missed you, too. I knew I did, but I didn’t know how much until I saw you again. You know, right after you flipped off my picture.”
Her laughter echoed in the hall before she hushed herself, making an oops face. “I want to see your tattoos, dammit.”
“You want me to take my sweater off here in the hall?”
“No.” She looked down at their hands, where their fingers were laced together like the last six years hadn’t happened. He kept his mouth shut, letting her work through her thoughts. Then she tilted her head back to look at him. “I want to see, though, because I didn’t look that closely at the poster. And there’s a coffeemaker in the room with some decaf packets. One more cup?”
“One more cup.” He had to let go of her hand so she could get her key card out of the small purse dangling from her other wrist. While she unlocked the door, he tried to tell himself not to get his hopes up.
He also tried to tell himself she wouldn’t notice one little tattoo mixed in with the others, but lying to himself wasn’t one of his strong suits. How she’d feel about it, though, he had no idea.
Chapter Three
Del stepped to one side so Brendan could go by and then let the door swing closed. Once she’d thrown the security bar, she tucked the key card back in her purse and tossed it next to the television on the big bureau.
She refused to second-guess herself any more tonight. She wasn’t any more capable of resisting Brendan now than she had been six years ago, and she wasn’t going to try anymore. He’d been a gentleman, of course, but she knew he wanted her. The smoldering looks he didn’t always manage to mask. The way he watched her mouth when she talked. And the way he’d squeezed her hand and not let her go until he had to.
What better place for a fling with an old flame than a casino hotel? She could have him one more time and then they’d go their separate ways again. But this time she’d be able to say goodbye and hold her head up as she walked away. Maybe she’d finally feel some sense of closure because she sure hadn’t before.
The room was dark except for the small bedside lamp she’d turned on before she left because she hated returning to an unlit hotel room. Brendan was at the window, looking out at the view. The moon was just bright enough to reflect off the river and show a hint of the tree line, and below them, cars still drove around the perimeter road.
“Pretty high up,” he said. “Doesn’t bother you?”
He remembered she didn’t like heights, she thought. She wasn’t sure why it surprised her, since she remembered almost everything about him. “Not really. I trust the glass, I guess. So are you going to show me those tattoos?”
Turning his head to look at her, he grinned. “You really want to see them?”
“Of course I do.” She’d spent a lot of time thinking about his body over the years—dreaming about it more often than she cared to admit—but she couldn’t picture him with tattoos.
He grasped the hem of his sweater and yanked it up, revealing chiseled abs that almost made her gasp. All of his muscles were taut as he pulled the sweater over his head and tossed it aside, and she had to curl her hands into fists to keep herself from touching him.
He had more than a few tattoos, she thought. They spread across his chest in an abstract pattern, like he’d said. Then they spread from his right shoulder and down his arm to his wrist. Intricate, interwoven geometric shapes all in black.
“Do you have any on your back?”
He shook his head, doing a slow turn. Del couldn’t hold back the deep sigh of appreciation the sight of his back muscles elicited, and she heard him chuckle. His left arm was bare, too, and she lifted her gaze to his face when he came full circle.
“I like them,” she said. “They make you look a little dangerous.”
“Just a little extra oomph to that whole wrong-side-of-the-tracks thing that first made you want me?”
She laughed and slapped his shoulder. “Wrong side of the tracks, my ass. Your father owns his own roofing company.”
“Yeah, but it’s a small roofing company and I didn’t own crap.” He caught her wrist and pulled her close against his body. “And you were very much Little Miss White Collar. Don’t deny it.”
She relaxed against him, feeling the heat from the body that was both familiar and strange. “It was your smile that first made me want you.”
“I smiled at you because I’d heard you laugh and wanted to hear it again.” He dipped his head as if he was going to kiss her, and her breath caught in anticipation, but then he stopped. “Did you really invite me in just for coffee, Del?”
“I told you I wanted to see your tattoos.” She ran her hand down his right arm. “But I don’t want coffee. I want you.”
She heard his sharp intake of breath. “Are you sure? You were flipping off my picture not too long ago.”
“And maybe I’d flip it off again, but that doesn’t stop me from wanting you right now. It’s been a while for me and I already know sex with you is amazing, so why not? We’ve stirred up a lot of stuff and rather than toss and turn all night, let’s get it out of our systems.”
“Are you sure?”
“I’ve missed your touch for years.” She skimmed her hands up his naked back. “I got some answers tonight, but let’s just consider it part of the closure process.”
She didn’t want to talk any more tonight, especially about the past. She wanted to stay in the right now, with this new Brendan with the tattoos and the chiseled abs. The smoldering heat in his eyes was familiar, though. And so were the hands that cupped her face as he lowered his mouth to hers.
Sighing against Brendan’s lips, she lost herself in his kiss. He was gentle at first, almost tentative, but then she ran her hands over his chest, brushing her thumbs over his nipples. Growling, he buried his hand in her hair and deepened the kiss.
The desire simmering under the surface since she’d watched him walk across the coffee shop went to a full boil and Del popped the button of his jeans open. He caught her bottom lip between his teeth, tugging gently before sweeping his tongue over hers.
She wanted him naked. She wanted her naked.
“Shit,” he muttered against her mouth before pulling away. She tucked her fingertips over the top of his jeans and held him close in case he was having second thoughts. That wasn’t the kind of thing a woman wanted to hear once she’d made up her mind to get naked. “I have a couple of condoms, but they’re in my duffel bag in my room.”
“I have some in my suitcase.”
“Good.” He ran his finger down the row of buttons on her shirt before popping the top two open. “I’d rather be here than seeing how fast I can get to my room and back.”
“I’ve heard you can have some sent up to your room,” she said, and then she laughed. “I think I’d feel too awkward to do that.”
“And I can’t wait that long.” After freeing the last button, Brendan slid her shirt over her shoulders, baring her blush-colored lace blouse to his gaze. “God, I’ve missed you.”
He lowered his mouth, kissing her collarbone in that spot that drove her crazy. So nice, she thought, to be with somebody who knew her body. And she knew his. Raking her nails up the back of his neck into his hairline made him moan and she closed her eyes to savor the sound.
Brendan’s hands slid to her back and a few seconds later, she felt the hooks on her bra let go. He was still kissing her neck, but as he pulled the straps down her arms, his mouth moved to her breasts.
She echoed his moan when his lips closed around her nipple. His mouth was hot as he sucked, tugging at the delicate flesh. After kicking off her shoes and undoing her pants, she hooked her thumbs in the waistband and shoved them down, taking her panties with them.
He chuc
kled, the sound vibrating against her skin. “In a hurry?”
“You have no idea.”
“Where’s your suitcase?”
The question confused her for a few seconds, before she remembered the condoms. “You get naked and I’ll meet you at the bed.”
She knew he watched her walk across the room instead of getting naked because she could see him in the mirror. Even in the reflection, she could practically feel the heat of his gaze. While she dug deep in the suitcase for the small case she kept her emergency essentials in, she heard the thump of his shoes hitting the floor and then his zipper.
When she turned, condom wrapper in hand, he was naked. Her mouth went dry at the sight of his hard, chiseled body, and she raised her eyebrows. “How much time do you spend at the gym?”
“Not as much time as I do carrying bundles of roofing shingles up ladders.”
She might have felt self-conscious about the fact that she was also standing there naked and it was obvious she didn’t spend her days doing physical labor, but it was impossible when he looked at her with such blatant hunger in his expression.
He met her at the edge of the bed and ripped the covers back before kissing her as he lowered her to the mattress. There was urgency to his kiss now and she felt her body respond with a flush of heat. She ran her hands over his body, exploring the taut muscles before cupping his ass.
Del buried her hand in his hair as his mouth closed over her nipple. He sucked gently, swirling his tongue over the sensitive tip before increasing the pressure until she squirmed. Then he moved to her other breast and did the same.
She ran her hands over his back, feeling the muscles under her fingertips. He had an amazing body and she enjoyed touching him as much as she did his mouth on her. When his hand slid down to cup her mound, she held her breath.
“Brendan, please.”
“Please what?” He lifted his head to look at her, heat smoldering in his dark eyes. His fingers stroked her hot flesh and she moaned, lifting her hips.
