The Bachelor's Baby Dilemma (Family Renewal)

by Sheri WhiteFeather

  “And he owns a horse facility?”

  “Yes. His operation is quite fancy. They even rent horses to the studios.”

  “Who knew he would grow up to be so successful? I certainly didn’t.” Mom sounded impressed but jealous, too.

  She’d always been obsessed with the entertainment industry, with actors and models and singers. Candy assumed that was why her mom had pushed her so hard to be recognized as one of the beautiful people.

  But Mom was an enigma. For someone who was obsessed with how other people looked, she hardly ever fixed herself up. She’d always worn her short brown hair in a matronly style, making her appear older than she was. She rarely fussed with makeup, either. Nor did she wear flattering clothes or take care of her figure.

  She worked as a secretary, and most of what she’d earned had been used for Candy’s dance lessons, beauty coaches and ball gowns. They’d even lived with Candy’s grandparents to make those things more attainable. But now Mom had her own tidy little house, with no one to micromanage or boss around.

  She wrapped the frogs and reached for another set. “How many salt and pepper shakers do you need?”

  Candy replied, “As many as I want. I collect them.”

  “I think they’re adorable.” Dana finally piped up, using a cheery voice. “Vintage collections are fun.”

  “It’s a waste of money.” Mom sent Candy a sour look. “Is it any wonder you can’t afford to keep your house?”

  The doorbell rang, and Candy thanked the heavens for the interruption. She didn’t care who was there or what they were selling, as long as it gave her an escape.

  Except that Dana beat her to it. Her friend said, “I’ll get it,” and zoomed out of the kitchen.

  Dang it. Dana owed her for that.

  Soon the blonde returned with Tanner in tow. “Look who it is.”

  Yes, look. There he was. Tall and dark with those wild gray eyes. Mom stopped packing and stepped out from behind her box. Candy’s pulse leaped, like one of the ceramic frogs come to life.

  “Speak of the devil,” Mom said, gauging his hot-as-hell appearance. “We were just talking about you.”

  He flashed a lethal smile, as if he was conducting business with an old enemy. “Then my ears must have been burning.” He paused. “So, how are you, Jo?”

  She thinned her lips. “I’d be better if my daughter didn’t have to sell her house.”

  He glanced at Candy and then stood up for her the way he had when they were teenagers. “She’s going to land on her feet.”

  Mom arched her body, reaching around to rub the swell of her back. “I hear you’re doing well. That you have yourself a fancy horse facility.”

  “You’ll have to come by and see it.”

  As if, Candy thought.

  Mom said, “I’m not an equestrian, but I always thought dressage was classy.”

  “We give dressage lessons. Maybe you can give it a try.”

  Mom waved away his comment, rolling her eyes and shaking her head. “I’ve got other things going on.”

  Tanner didn’t drop it so easily. “You’re welcome to come there anytime.” When she snorted like one of his horses, he added, “It’s a standing offer.”

  “Then I suppose we’ll have to see,” Mom told him.

  Candy wasn’t sure what to make of their conversation. But at least it was over and no blood had been shed. She motioned to Tanner, and they went onto the porch.

  “I came by to see how you were doing,” he said. “But I didn’t expect to see your mom.”

  “I didn’t expect for her to be here, either.” She sat on the top step and dusted her hands on her jeans. “Would you really give her dressage lessons?”

  “If she truly wanted to learn, I would.” He sat beside her. “But apparently her opinion of me hasn’t changed.”

  “She’s just ticked because you can afford to buy my house. She thinks it’s foolish for you to help raise Ivy, too. But I know you’re going to prove her wrong.”

  “Thanks for coming to my defense. By the way, I ordered a three-piece nursery set today. A crib, a dresser and a changing table. I haven’t scheduled the delivery date yet. I’ll do that as soon as I move in.”

  Candy would be moving on the day escrow closed, but the house wouldn’t be vacant. She was leaving behind the furniture he’d purchased from her. She was also letting him borrow some other pieces, rather than put them in storage. She trusted that he wouldn’t damage anything, and it made her feel better to know that the house would look much the same. “I’m glad you found something for the baby’s room that you like.”

  “It’s white. That seemed to be the most common color. I chose the crib because of how well rated it is. Don’t forget that you offered to go shopping with me for the rest of the stuff.”

  “I haven’t forgotten. Once you’re settled and the nursery is put together, we can shop. I’ll get online and download a checklist of things you’ll need.”

  “Your help means a lot to me, especially now that the due date is getting closer.”

  “I’m glad to do it. I cohosted Dana’s baby shower. It was at her house. She got all sorts of great gifts.” She shot him a silly grin. “Maybe we should have a shower for you.”

  “Perish the thought.” He kicked his booted feet out in front of him. “I wish Meagan was getting to experience those sorts of things, though.”

  “I know. I understand.” His sister was missing out on all the joy of having a baby. “But she’s lucky that she has you.”

  “I started the nanny search. I’ve been working with an agency. Hopefully, I’ll have someone lined up soon. The nannies who are newborn-care specialists book fast, so they told me not to wait too long.”

  “You’ll have someone in no time.”

  “That’s the plan. How’s your packing? Are you almost done?”

  “Yes. But I wish I didn’t have to go back into the house and face my mom. I’d just as soon run away today.”

  “I’d let you sneak off with me, but I suspect she would hunt you down.”

  “No doubt.” And running away with him wasn’t a good idea, no matter how glorious it sounded. Regardless, she asked, “If we did take off, where would we go?”

  “Anywhere you want.” He placed his hand on her knee, then quickly removed it, as if he’d done something wrong.

  But it didn’t matter. His fingertips had already sent sexy shock waves through her system. She assumed that he felt it, too. Or why else would he have jerked his hand away?

  “I better get going,” he said, in a sudden hurry. “I have appointments this afternoon.”

  “Yes, I’m sure you’re busy.” She wasn’t going to try to keep him, not with the way they were making each other feel.

  “I’ll be in touch,” he said as they stood up.

  Being in touch wasn’t the same as actually touching. Or kissing. Or dancing. Or having sex, she thought, as she watched him walk away.

  But even after he left and she returned to the kitchen, she couldn’t get him off her mind. Candy was trapped in the temptation that was Tanner.

  * * *

  Two weeks passed, with Candy adjusting to the changes in her mixed-up life. She still hadn’t found another part-time job, but she continued to look, hoping for the best. And now, of course, she was staying with Eric and Dana.

  As for Tanner, he was coming by today so they could shop for baby goods. Her attraction to him was still as strong as ever, but she tried not to dwell on it.

  When he arrived, she took a deep breath and greeted him with a smile.

  “Where is everyone?” he asked upon entering the living room.

  “Eric and Dana took Jude to the park. They took Yogi with them, too.” Though Candy thoroughly appreciated being here—it was a
nice place, with Dana’s creative touch—she missed the house she’d sold to Tanner.

  He extended the canvas bag that was in his hand. “I brought you some lemons, like I promised I would.”

  “Thank you.” She clutched the bag, feeling as if she were clutching a piece of the house that was no longer hers. “I’ll make meringue cookies with them.”

  “I’ll bet it’s a healthy recipe.”

  “It is.” She headed for the kitchen.

  Tanner followed her, and while she arranged the fruit in a bowl, he asked, “Will you save some of the cookies for me?”

  “Of course. I’ll make extras just for you.”

  He glanced out the window that overlooked the backyard, then leaned against the counter. “I hired a nanny. She can start whenever I need her, so she’ll be moving in next Tuesday. That will give her a week to get acclimated before the due date, so even if Ivy arrives a little early, the nanny will be there. She’s just what I’d hoped to find—older, highly experienced, bright and friendly. She raised a big family of her own. She’s from England, and she has the coolest accent.”

  Candy teased him, “You hired Mary Poppins?”

  He laughed. “I’ve never seen that movie, but I suppose I did. Her name isn’t Mary, though. It’s Libby.”

  “Libby Poppins?”

  “Libby Jones.”

  “I’m looking forward to meeting her.”

  “You’ll like her, for sure. And I’m so relieved. Of everyone I interviewed, she’s the only one who fit all of my criteria. She’s going to take care of the baby, but she’s also going to teach me how to do everything. She was really sweet about Meagan, too. Some of the other nannies were uncomfortable about the prison aspect and having to bring the baby there, but Libby is fine with it. She’s going to accompany me whenever I visit Meagan.”

  “She sounds like a gem.”

  “She is. Do you want to visit Meagan sometime, too?”

  “Yes, I would love to see your sister.” She was touched that he was bringing her into the fold. “I have no idea what’s expected of me, though. Do I have to get approved first?”

  He nodded. “There’s a visitor’s questionnaire that Meagan will have to send you with her signature. After you fill it out and sign it, you return it to the prison, and they run a background check on you.”

  “I’m okay with that.” She didn’t have anything to hide.

  “Once you’re approved, you’ll have to follow their rules, like how to dress, what items you’re allowed to bring and the types of activities they permit. Visiting hours are Saturdays and Sundays from eight to three.”

  “I’d be glad to go whenever I’m available.”

  “It will be nice to have you there.” He frowned. “If you can call something like that nice.”

  Deciding it was time to change the subject, she said, “Let me show you Jude’s room before we go shopping. Eric and Dana decorated it in a zoo-animals theme. Eric painted the animals on the walls. It was his way of protecting Jude with Native totems. He even wrote out the spiritual meanings next to them.”

  She took him down the hall, and they entered the room. She stood back and watched Tanner check everything out. He seemed mesmerized by the animals: the Trickster Coyote, the Mother Earth Turtle, the Gentle Deer, the Introspective Bear, the Magic Raven.

  “The Wolf is Dana’s favorite because of the teacher symbolism,” Candy said.

  “Because Eric is a teacher?”

  “Yes, and Butterfly is Eric’s favorite because it represents transformation, and he says it’s Dana’s spirit guide.”

  “Which is Jude’s favorite?”

  “He seems to like them all. He’s got stuffed animals everywhere, too, as you can see. It’s a happy room.”

  “I want Ivy’s nursery to be happy, too. I wonder if we should create a theme. If it was up to me, I’d use horses or ponies or something, but Meagan isn’t into horses the way I am, so it doesn’t seem fair to choose a theme that my sister won’t connect with.”

  “What do you think Meagan would choose?”

  “I have no idea. But she would probably just tell me to do whatever feels right. She’s cautious about interjecting too many of her thoughts and feelings about what she considers my house.” He reached for a toy monkey and played with its floppy arms. “Maybe we can do a magic-castle theme since Meagan named Ivy after a princess. Besides, my sister loves that kind of stuff. She still talks about the enchanted stories our mom used to read to her.”

  “That’s a wonderful idea. Castles and clouds and winged horses.”

  He grinned. “You just came up with a sneaky way of slipping some horses into it. We might as well add a few unicorns, too.”

  Her pulse fluttered. “I’m good with that.”

  “This is going to be fun.”

  Too fun, she thought. Candy steadied her breath, reminding herself that this wasn’t her child. That no matter how close she got to the situation, Ivy didn’t belong to her.

  “What’s wrong?” he asked suddenly.

  “Nothing.”

  “You’re frowning.”

  “I was?” She made a lame excuse. “I must have gotten sidetracked with the way you’re tugging on that poor monkey’s arms.”

  He patted the toy’s head, as if to apologize to it, and put it back where he got it. “What do you think of incorporating falling stars into it?”

  “For making wishes?”

  “Yes, but also because Falling Star is a Cheyenne folklore hero, and that might be a nice way of bringing my culture into it, like Eric did with his.”

  Curious about the folklore, she asked, “Why is Falling Star a hero?”

  “He fell from the sky when he was in his mother’s womb, then grew up to save his people from a terrible monster.” Tanner stood beside Jude’s crib. “His mother didn’t survive the fall. She broke into pieces because she wasn’t originally from the sky, but Falling Star was made of star material, so he couldn’t break.”

  Candy wished her baby would have been made of star material. “What happened to him after he hit the ground?”

  “A meadowlark picked him up and put him in her nest with her babies. She and the father meadowlark raised him with their young until Falling Star was old enough to go off on his own.”

  She imagined her little one living with a family of meadowlarks. Her lost baby. The miscarriage she still hadn’t told Tanner about.

  He said, “We should definitely try to find some items with stars on them. Having them around might help make Ivy strong.”

  “Then we’ll do our best to find as many as we can.” She wanted his niece to be strong. Unbroken, she thought.

  “Did you download the checklist from the Net?”

  “It’s in my purse.”

  He moved away from the crib. “Are you ready to go?”

  She nodded, and they left the house. She sat beside him in his truck, thinking about the broken baby she’d lost.

  Once they arrived at the store, Candy got herself together. She removed the checklist and said, “We should probably focus on the essentials first. Then we can search for the other stuff.”

  “How many essentials are there?”

  She handed him the two-page list. “Take a look.”

  He widened his eyes. “All of this for one little baby?”

  “And that’s just for starters. There’s going to be a lot more as she gets older.”

  “Damn. Are you sure you don’t want to just crack open a bottle of tequila and get drunk with me?”

  “Tanner.” She didn’t need the sexual implication that went with his joke. The heat. The hunger. The fantasy of sleeping with him. “I’m being serious.”

  “So am I. Look at this frigging list. Hmm. I think some of it might b
e a problem. Nursing bras? A breast pump?”

  “Okay, funny guy. Just pay attention to things you will need.”

  He scanned the list again. “I hadn’t even thought about a diaper pail or a hamper, let alone a cradle or a rocking chair.”

  “Well, now you’re thinking about it.”

  “My head is going to explode.”

  “Quit being so melodramatic and grab a cart.”

  “A cart? We’re going to need a forklift.”

  They grabbed two carts, one for each of them to push.

  “How am I supposed to fit a cradle or a rocking chair in here?” he asked.

  There he went, kidding around again. Obviously, some things would have to be delivered.

  She said, “I think we should look for a daybed for the nursery, too. That way, the nanny can sleep in there while she’s adjusting to Ivy’s feeding schedule. Most parents keep their newborns close to them at first.”

  “That’s a great idea. I’d prefer knowing someone is with Ivy as much as possible. I can crash in there on the nanny’s days off.”

  Once they started shopping, they worked well as a team. Choosing the car seat and the stroller took quite a bit of time. So did analyzing the monitors that were available. Candy suggested the one Dana and Eric had used for the first year of Jude’s life since it had a SIDS-type safety feature.

  As they continued to browse, Tanner marveled over the little things, like how tiny the clothes were. The linens fascinated him, too. They found a quilt with a pink-and-gold castle on it, along with an assortment of crib sheets and receiving blankets embellished with stars. He grabbed stacks of those, certain they’d hit the jackpot. He even found a mobile that played “Twinkle Twinkle Little Star,” which became the most prized possession of all. The rest of the theme they’d chosen, the winged horses and unicorns, came in the form of lamps, stuffed animals and switch-plate covers.

  They returned to his house—her old house—and unloaded his truck, dumping everything in the nursery.

  He ordered pizza, and they ate while she helped him organize. By the time they were done, the room glittered in sweet infant magic.

  Candy could have stayed there forever, pretending that this was still her house and that Ivy was her baby. But it wasn’t, and no amount of dreaming was going to change that.