Lights and Shadows (Oregon In Love)

by Bonnie Blythe

  Marc wondered why either of them bothered trying to meet before the holidays, but this was the time Nathan’s secretary had given him. He sighed, tired of looking up expectantly as each party of people passed, only to be disappointed when it wasn’t Nathan. After another fifteen more minutes had elapsed, Marc wondered if he’d mixed up his days.

  “This way please.”

  Hearing the waitress, Marc leaned forward, hoping his editor would appear any moment. But when he saw who the waitress led in, he leaned back in the booth, his hands gripping the edge of the table. Julia and her partner breezed past him and were seated at a table, angled away from his booth.

  Marc didn’t have to worry he might be seen. It looked to him like Julia had eyes for no one but the blond man. When he saw him take her hand and lift it to his lips, a red mist swam before his eyes. Unwilling to witness such a scene, Marc rose and left the dining room. In the lobby, he called Nathan’s office. The secretary apologized, saying she’d tried to reach him and reschedule the appointment due to Nathan coming down with a case of the flu. She instructed him to call back and reschedule after the holidays.

  Marc wearily pocketed his phone and made his way to his truck. Talk about stab and twist. He rolled his eyes to the heavens. God, was that really necessary?

  ***

  Julia looked at her hand, wrapped in Spencer’s larger one. Carefully schooling her expression, she slowly raised her eyes. “Spencer,” she said softly, “I can’t tell you how much I value the time we’ve had to work together. Without your help and persistence and your savvy, this project would’ve floundered.” She paused, taking a surreptitious breath. “And the friendship that’s grown out of our business relationship means a lot to me.”

  “Friendship,” he said dubiously. His thumb ran lightly over her fingers. “I’ve maintained a professional distance from you for months, Julia. Now that the assignment is essentially complete, I had hoped your feelings would’ve grown beyond friendship.”

  “You’re a wonderful man, Spencer, but—” she paused and swallowed, trying to think of a way to discourage his romantic notions without hurting him.

  With a heavy sigh, he released her hand and leaned back in his chair. “But I’m not a certain photography instructor.”

  Julia’s eyes widened and she began to protest. Spencer held up his hand.

  “I’m not blind. I’ve seen the way you two look at each other. It’s like you’re both starving and you view each other as a five-course meal.”

  Julia flushed and shook her head. “It’s not that bad,” she said with a strained smile.

  “He’s an idiot for letting you get away.”

  Her smile vanished. “Spencer, please—”

  “I’m sorry,” he said quietly. “Since I’m unable to tempt you, I at least hope all your affection won’t be wasted. Maybe something will work out between you two after all.” His eyes darkened as he took her hand once again. Touching his lips to her fingers, he smiled. “But if you ever change your mind...”

  Julia didn’t trust herself to speak. She bit her lip. So many if only’s.

  ***

  When Marc arrived back at his apartment later that day, there were two messages from the friends he’d made plans with. The flu bug had apparently struck in eastern Oregon as well. While he was disappointed he wouldn’t see them, he also felt a measure of relief. He just wasn’t in the holiday mood. After calling them back and offering sympathy and regret, he wondered what to do next. A hiking trip in the Mt Hood National Forest would perhaps tire him out so he wouldn’t spend the next several days in useless introspection. He quickly packed, left a message on his voicemail of his whereabouts, and headed to the mountain.

  Once bundled against the cold in the quiet world of a winter forest, some of the tension drained from his body. Marc trekked well-established trails, easily accessible from the road. Only the sifting patter of snowfall, the crunch of his boots, and the sound of his own breathing broke the silence.

  The quiet beauty of the surrounding landscape served to hush his soul and he used the opportunity to pray, specifically about Julia. Instead of trying to untangle the mess, he poured out all his confusion, doubt, and heartache before the Lord, releasing it completely to Him. As he looked up at the blanketed trees, to the winter sun piercing through the upper boughs, a sweet peace stole into his heart. He realized this was something he should’ve done a long time ago. It might’ve saved him—and Julia—a lot of anguish.

  ***

  After returning to Portland once Christmas was over, Marc began preparing for his classes. When he sat down to prepare his curriculum, he found he’d forgotten a key text book at the college. He decided to drive out to Northwest and pick it up.

  With only a few days before the new year, the halls were virtually deserted. In his classroom, Marc located the book and slipped it into his briefcase before heading back out to his truck.

  On his way past the administrative offices, he heard someone talking about Julia. He came to a sudden, silent stop. Unable to withstand a desire to know what they were saying, he stood just outside the office door, listening to the two female voices.

  “Wilcox?”

  “You know, that consultant woman working with Spencer Meyers. They discovered one of the auditors embezzled nearly five million dollars from the college coffers. They spent all night together cracking the case.”

  “Are you kidding? How do you know?”

  “I saw them come out of his office that morning. She had on the same cute Nicole Miller dress she’d worn the day before. And Mr. Meyers was in dire need of a shave. They seemed pretty cozy to me. You figure out the rest.”

  “Maybe they really were just working,” the voice said half-heartedly.

  A snort from the other. “Tell me, if you were in a small room with Spencer Meyers all night long, would you spend the whole time number crunching?”

  The woman laughed. “I see your point.”

  Marc woodenly moved from the door and headed down the main staircase. His mind spun in a hundred different directions as his new-found hope took a beating. While he knew Julia was innocent of the innuendo portrayed in the gossip, that didn’t stop a sick feeling from forming in the pit of his stomach.

  Before he had time to deal with the blow, he suddenly saw Julia before him. She came up the stairs at a brisk pace, her arms filled with expandable files. Her expression seemed unfocused and she rushed right past, apparently without seeing him.

  Wondering if she had simply chosen to ignore him, Marc looked back at her. When she reached the top step, she came to a halt. Marc watched in shock as the files cascaded from her arms. She seemed to collapse in slow motion. As she toppled backward, he darted up the few steps between them and caught her just before her head slammed into the steps. Breathing heavily at the close save, he stood immobile for a moment with Julia limp in his arms.

  Marc lifted her up and began a slow descent down the stairs. One of the office workers, who’d witnessed the scene, rushed along side him, directing him into a nearby staff room. He gently set Julia on one of the couches, his alarm mushrooming at her utter stillness.

  “Should I call an ambulance?” the woman behind him asked.

  Marc picked up one of Julia’s icy hands and felt for her pulse on the inside of her wrist. He was no doctor, but her pulse seemed shallow to him. “Um, I think she just passed out. Let’s give her a minute.” Curling her hand around his fingers, he softly called her name. After a moment, she began to stir.

  “What’s going on? What’s wrong with Julia?”

  Marc looked up to see Spencer striding into the room. “I...think she fainted.”

  Spencer flashed him a dark look. “I can take over from here.”

  His dismissive tone and possessive attitude toward Julia galled Marc. It took considerable self-control to keep his mouth shut. Julia blinked in confusion and struggled to sit up. He turned and left the room.

  ***

  “What happened?”
Julia asked groggily.

  Spencer hunkered down next to her and took her hand in his. “You fainted,” he said gently.

  She looked up at him, bewildered. “I was on the stairs...”

  The office worker spoke up. “One of the instructors caught you and brought you in here.”

  Instinctively thinking of Marc, she looked around the room for him. She was keenly disappointed when she didn’t see him.

  “Why don’t you lean back your head and rest for a while,” Spencer urged.

  “I’m fine. Besides, I must’ve dropped all my files.”

  “I’ll take care of it, you don’t need to worry. In fact, I want you to take the rest of the afternoon off.”

  Julia sat up fully and set her feet on the floor.

  “I don’t think you’re ready to stand yet. Take it easy.”

  “I’m fine,” she said firmly.

  Spencer shook his head. “Let me drive you home.”

  “That’s not necessary.”

  “Julia—”

  “Please,” she said, her eyes pleading with him for understanding. “This is embarrassing enough as it is. I’ll get home fine, okay?”

  He considered the idea for a moment, then rose. “Stay here at least until I get the files picked up.”

  She nodded and waited for him to return. Fifteen minutes later, when he came back into the lounge, he had her purse and briefcase with him.

  “You don’t need to take those files home tonight. I locked them in my office.”

  Julia smiled wanly. “Thank you, Spencer.” She carefully stood up, trying to disguise her continued wooziness. “But I’ll be fine. If I feel dizzy, I’ll pull right off the road.”

  “Then let me help you to your car.”

  “You’re sweet, but really, I can manage. I just got a little light-headed, that’s all.”

  Spencer stuffed his hands in his pockets. “Has anyone ever told you you’re unbelievably stubborn?”

  She gave him a shaky smile. “I refuse to answer that on the grounds it may incriminate me.”

  “You’re sure you feel well enough to drive?”

  “Positive.”

  “Well, then, drive slow and cautious.”

  “Of course.”

  “You forget, I’ve been in a car with you.”

  She squeezed his hand. “Thank you for being so concerned.”

  Before he could change his mind and follow her out, Julia walked as quickly as she dared out of the building. When she went around the building to where her car was parked, she found Marc leaning on the driver’s side door of her Camry. He walked up to her, took her briefcase, and held out his hand.

  Julia licked her suddenly dry lips. He was so close, she could feel the warmth emanating from his body. “I’m okay,” she croaked, feeling hot and cold by turns.

  Marc continued to hold out his hand. “The keys, Julia.”

  Her temper flared. “You can’t force me to let you drive. Besides, how will you get back?”

  “I’ve taken care of that. Now unless you want a scene, I suggest you give me the keys.”

  Julia lifted her chin. With exaggerated slowness, she fished her keys out of her purse and dropped them into his palm. He unlocked the door and settled her into the passenger seat, apparently indifferent to her fulminating glare. Back on the other side, Marc slid behind the wheel and started the engine.

  After several miles, Julia’s anger began to subside. Perhaps she could’ve been a risk to others drivers. She shot a furtive glance at Marc and bit her lip. The fact he was close enough to touch unnerved her. A residual dizziness continued to plague her, so she closed her eyes and leaned her head back against the seat.

  Unfortunately, without the distraction of the passing scenery, her mind drifted to other times with Marc. When driving, he always held her hand. Now his hands were both firmly on the steering wheel. The knowledge sent a new fissure through her heart. Stop thinking about him! As soon as his Good Samaritan deed is done, he’ll be out of your life for good. Fresh despair welled up within her at the notion.

  An hour later, they arrived at the B & B. Marc, deaf to Julia’s protestations, helped her from the car and into the cottage. They stood in the tiny kitchen area, silence stretching between them.

  Still feeling the imprint of his hand on her arm, she swallowed back the urge to cry. “How will you get home?”

  “If you must know, I called a cab before I left the school.”

  “That will cost a fortune! At least let me pay the fare.”

  “Keep your money,” he snapped. “And stop being so stubborn. You need to rest!”

  Julia took umbrage at his tone, but saw tenderness in his eyes. She lowered her gaze, holding her hands at her sides to keep from reaching out to him. “Thank you for your help.”

  “That’s more like it,” he said softly as a yellow taxicab drove up. Marc regarded her for a moment, then left the cottage and walked to the cab. He got in and was gone.

  A myriad of thoughts went through her mind as she stared out the window—regrets, hopes, wishes, anguish—

  Suddenly a white-hot pain ripped through her head, knocking her off-balance. Julia grabbed hold of the back of a chair in an effort to remain upright. Her vision blurred as she turned and stumbled into the bedroom. She yanked open the drawer of the nightstand with clumsy fingers, trying to find an amber bottle with a specific label. Medical jargon—and her surroundings—became hazy. She squinted at the label of one bottle.

  With her last shred of strength, she grappled with the child-proof cap...before everything went dark.

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  Brian and Sara pulled into the driveway, parking next to Julia’s black Camry.

  “Looks like your sister is home early,” Sara said.

  “That’s a switch,” Brian said cynically.

  She put a hand on his arm. “Try to be more understanding, honey. She’s going through a lot right now. And what’s happened between her and Marc hasn’t helped any.”

  Sighing, he got out of the car. “Who knows. Maybe something will eventually work out between them.”

  Sara carefully removed Alan from his car seat and snuggled him in her arms. “I’m going over to ask if she’ll have dinner with us. I’m worried she’s not taking care of herself.”

  Brian shrugged. “She always was a scrawny little thing, but go ahead and ask her. And tell her we won’t take no for an answer.”

  Sara walked over to the cottage and knocked on the door. When there was no response, she peeked in the window. “Brian! Come here quick!”

  He ran over and pushed open the door. They both rushed inside, finding Julia sprawled across the bed, her body sprinkled with little white pills. One hand still held a medication bottle.

  “Call an ambulance, Sara!”

  She started for the door as Brian took the bottle from Julia’s hand. Before he could feel for a pulse, Julia groaned and reached for her head.

  “Wait a minute, she’s waking up.” He tugged on his sister’s hand. “Julia, tell me what’s wrong! Did you take any pills?”

  “It hurts,” Julia whispered thickly.

  “What hurts?”

  Rubbing her eyes and head, her voice came out sounding weak. “I can’t think.”

  “Julia, you need to answer me. Did you take any of these pills?”

  Sara pulled Alan more tightly against her chest when he began to whimper. “Do you still want me to call for an ambulance?”

  Julia slowly sat up, going white with the effort. “No doctors,” she pleaded. “Just give me a minute. I’ll be fine.” Giving lie to her words, she collapsed against the pillows.

  “Julia, you need to talk to me and tell me what’s the matter.”

  She covered her eyes with her hands. “My head feels like it’s going to explode. I think it’s a migraine.”

  “Is that why you took the pills?” Brian asked.

  Easing one eye open, then wincing at the light, she sighed. “What does
the label say?”

  Brian turned the bottle. “Fiorinal. Did you take any?”

  “I don’t remember. I couldn’t get the cap off.”

  “You got the cap off, Julia. They’re everywhere.” He sighed heavily and looked over at Sara. “Call our family doctor and tell him we need to bring in my sister.”

  Eyes wide, Sara nodded and hurried out the door.

  “No doctors!”

  “You don’t have a choice. Can you walk?”

  “Of course I can walk!” But when she tried to stand, she landed back on the edge of the bed.

  Brian leaned over to help her and spotted the contents of the nightstand drawer. “What in the world is all this?” He scooped up four orange bottles, each with a different label. “Why didn’t you tell me you were on medication?”

  “Because I’m not,” Julia retorted, then regretted raising her voice. The sound of it ricocheted in her skull.

  “Then what is all this for?”

  She waved her hand dismissively. “You know doctors, they just throw a prescription at you to get rid of you. My secretary at the firm had them filled against my wishes.”

  “What is it for?” Brian asked grimly.

  “Headaches mostly,” she said. “One may be for my heart, but I can’t remember.”

  “Your heart?” Brian howled. “For crying out loud, Julia! Why didn’t you say anything?”

  “I told you I’m fine. I only wanted a pill for my headache since the Tylenol wasn’t helping.”

  Sara returned and poked her head in the door. “They said they’ll give us the last appointment, but we need to hurry.”

  Julia began to protest, but Brian calmly picked her up and headed toward his truck. “We’ll be back soon,” he said to Sara.