This Heart for Hire

by Marie Ferrarella

A moment later, her own phone buzzed. Instead of picking up, since the door leading out was opened, she called out to him. “Who’s on the line, Albert?”

  She heard the exaggerated sigh before he replied. “Someone you shouldn’t talk to.”

  That was an odd answer, even for Albert. Jessica rose from her desk and crossed to the doorway. “Meaning?”

  Albert looked at the telephone accusingly. “It’s his brother.”

  “His?”

  It was a completely impersonal pronoun that could be attached to the entire male population at large, Jessica thought. There was no reason in the world why adrenaline should suddenly be pumping itself through her veins in anticipation. Except that Albert, with his tendency to mother her, wouldn’t be trying to shield her from the entire male population at large. Only from one male in particular.

  Albert gave a little huff. “Dane Buchanan is on the line and says he needs to speak to you. Says it’s—”

  Jessica didn’t wait for him to finish. Turning on her heel, she was back in her office and leaning over her desk to pick up her receiver.

  “Hello?”

  “Jessica, it’s Dane Buchanan.”

  Jessica sat down behind her desk again. She took a breath. She hadn’t spoken to Dane since she and Logan had gone their separate ways. Why was he suddenly calling? “Dane, if this is a social call, I—”

  “I’m afraid it’s not a social call. It’s business.” Jessica heard tension enter the man’s voice. “I know I don’t have the right to ask, not after what happened between you and Logan, but I need to see you as soon as possible.”

  Her skin prickled, bringing her to attention. “Why, what’s going on, Dane?”

  “I guess there’s no way to say this but to say it. Logan’s been getting death threats.”

  She found that difficult to fathom. Logan had always led a charmed, golden life. “Disgruntled women?”

  “I’m serious, Jessica.”

  Straightening, Jessica’s hand tightened on the receiver. “Tell me.”

  “He’s been getting these letters, incoherent things really, promising dire consequences unless—” Dane broke off the sentence, hesitating. “Listen, he’d kill me if he knew I was calling you, but he absolutely refuses to go to the police, won’t take this seriously at all.” Dane blew out a breath in exasperation. “Well, you know Logan.”

  No, not really. I just thought I did. Jessica swallowed the retort. “Yes, I know Logan. Nothing’s serious as far as he’s concerned.”

  “Jessica, I’d really appreciate being able to talk to you in person about this. It’s pretty delicate. I’m not due in the office for another couple of hours. If you could just come by the house...” His voice trailed off, leaving a hopeful note in its wake.

  She glanced at the calendar on her desk out of habit, knowing what she would see before she looked. The morning was completely free. She almost wished it wasn’t, so she could offer an legitimate excuse. It wasn’t in her to lie. One of her failings, she supposed, not being able to form gracious lies to ease herself out of difficult situations.

  “All right.” She checked her watch. At this hour there’d be no traffic. She gave herself a little extra time, anyway. “I can be there in about forty minutes.”

  “Perfect. And Jessica?”

  There was something in his voice, she couldn’t quite place it. She supposed, when it came to the Buchanans, she wasn’t very good at second-guessing. “Yes?”

  “Thanks.”

  “Don’t thank me yet.” She hung up and frowned at the receiver. It took her a moment to realize that Albert was in the doorway, disapproval etched into his angular features.

  “You took the call.”

  “I took the call.”

  He huffed as he walked into the room. “It seems that that repairman didn’t get all the bugs out of the phone system.” He pushed the telephone back on her desk with a disdainful hand. “There should be a way to screen out the undesirables.”

  Albert was getting a little too carried away, she thought. But then, he had a flair for the dramatic, and he did make her laugh. At times that was very, very important to her. And he had other valuable attributes. He could make a computer dance to his every whim.

  Still, that didn’t give him a right to be her censor. “Dane Buchanan is not an undesirable.”

  “No,” he granted. “But his brother is.”

  She shook her head, a bittersweet smile playing along her lips. “No,” she said softly, “that’s just the trouble. He’s not.”

  Albert leaned forward, scrutinizing her face. “You’re not seriously thinking about taking this case, are you?” He had his answer before the words were out of his mouth, but he was hoping he had misread her.

  “And why wouldn’t I seriously think about taking this case?”

  “Because it’s a sham, a ploy, a way to get you up there to see Logan.” Surely she had to see that. She was as smart as they came, and a child could see this was a fabrication.

  “A,” she ticked off on her fingers, “I’m seeing Dane, not Logan, and B, there is no ploy. I did not walk out on Logan Buchanan, he walked out on me. He doesn’t want to ‘get’ me back.” She pulled her purse out of the bottom drawer of her desk and kicked it closed again, punctuating her statement.

  He knew all the details, had been there to hold her hand and call Logan vile names in her stead since she didn’t vocalize her pain. He detested Logan for what he’d done to Jessica’s heart.

  “All the more reason for you to say no.” He knew it was fruitless to tell her not to go. He tried, anyway. “You’re too sharp a lady to walk into that lion’s den and willingly let yourself be devoured.”

  Jessica laughed. “You are a very colorful man, Albert. No lion’s den, no devouring, I promise.” She crossed to the doorway. “I’m just going to listen for old times’ sake, maybe give him the benefit of my advice. Chances are I won’t have to see Logan at all. And I’ll see you later.”

  He merely snorted his displeasure. “Be careful.”

  The warning rang in her ears. Jessica stopped, then turned around and took him by surprise by kissing his cheek. “Thanks for caring, Albert.”

  Albert touched his cheek, watching her go. “It’s a dirty job, but someone has to do it.”

  “Yeah, yeah.” She waved a hand at him as she went out the door.

  No matter how much Jessica tried to deny it, to bury it, her stomach turned over with anticipation as she drove through the towering black gates after identifying herself to the man in the security booth.

  Albert was right, she should have her head examined for even thinking about coming here, much less actually doing it. So why in heaven’s name had she? Why wasn’t she turning her car around instead of parking outside his house?

  Because, she thought, shutting the car door behmd her, heartless bastard that he was, if this was on the level, then Logan needed her. She knew damn well that he wouldn’t go to the police. That wasn’t his style.

  Besides, if anyone was going to shoot Logan Buchanan, it was going to be her. She’d earned the right. In spades.

  They’d met on a rainy day, much like this one. She’d looked like a drowned rat, dashing for the cover of the awning. Late for a fund-raiser she hadn’t wanted to attend but had, at her mother’s insistence. Jessica had collided with Logan and sent him sprawling. And he had laughed it off.

  She’d always loved the sound of his laughter. Deep, rich, like a revitalizing cup of coffee.

  And she’d loved him with all her heart. Her young, foolish, misguided heart. She hadn’t given a single thought to self-preservation.

  Being with Logan then had interrupted her life. She’d put everything on hold for him.

  Jessica had been that sure he was the right one.

  Well, he wasn’t, and their relationship had taught her a valuable lesson. It had taught her not to trust her instincts. Sometimes the facts had to come into play. Facts such as the one that clearly showed Mr. Logan Bucha
nan was a man who dallied, then went on to the next amusement on his list. Usually a supermodel with surgically enhanced lips and breasts.

  Jessica shut her eyes, trying to squeeze away the memory. It was two years in the past. Better put, she was two years in the future.

  Jessica turned toward the house. For one precarious moment her breath threatened to back up in her lungs as she saw him. Saw Logan rounding the side of the house she’d once told him could have easily doubled as the gracious Southern mansion in Gone With The Wind, even though it was in Southern California.

  Rounding the side of the house and coming toward her.

  He looked as surprised as she felt. He didn’t know she was coming, did he? He hadn’t secretly coached his brother to make the call.

  Jessica realized that she was still holding on to that hope. Idiot.

  Oh God, why had she come? And why wasn’t she immune to the sight of him? Why, after all he’d put her through, after all the time that had gone by, did he look so damn good to her? Jessica decided then and there that there really was no justice in the world.

  For a glimmer of a second, Logan thought he was hallucinating, that he’d crossed the line between reality and make believe. Was he now actually conjuring up images of Jessica instead of just imagining her in his mind’s eye?

  But she was real, and she was here.

  She took his breath away. As always.

  He’d come perilously close to totaling the car in the practice run this morning. Something had gone wrong with the steering column, and he’d narrowly avoided flattening himself and his car against a wall. The incident had managed to put the fear of mortality in him like nothing else ever had.

  Was it just a fluke, human error, or had whoever was writing those letters to him just upped the ante and taken those threats a step further?

  The question had throbbed in his head until just now, when he’d seen her.

  Like a man in a dream, he continued walking toward her, expecting her to disappear at the last moment.

  She didn’t disappear.

  This was no mirage, no hallucination. This was no trick of light or mind. This was Jessica, looking even more beautiful than he remembered. He hadn’t thought that was possible. Logan could feel an ache starting in his gut.

  Had she really thought she was going to come here and not run the risk of seeing Logan? Jessica chided herself. But wouldn’t Dane have said something about Logan being on the premises? Dane knew what had happened between her and his brother, he would have warned her.

  Wouldn’t he?

  Mentally, she braced herself, knowing she’d been through worse. But for the life of her, she couldn’t remember when.

  Why hadn’t she listened to Albert?

  Logan stopped before her, still feeling like a man trapped in a dream. Why was she here? He couldn’t come up with a single plausible explanation, couldn’t even think rationally. But then, she’d had that effect on him from the start.

  He’d seen her once or twice since the breakup. In a crowd, at some social function or other. He’d kept his distance for both their sakes, mainly his. But now she was here on his home ground, and distance was the last thing that was crossing his mind.

  “Jessica.”

  For the second time in Logan’s life, he felt awkward. The first time had involved her, as well. It was when he’d watched her rush from his library, crying, after he’d told her it was time they went their separate ways. That they’d had a great run, but now the curtain was coming down and it was over.

  He hadn’t known what to- do then, either.

  She’d be damned if she’d stand here, frozen like some unschooled adolescent. Jessica raised her chin, her eyes narrowing slightly. Was it her imagination, or just wishful thinking on her part, that made him look just a little uneasy?

  “You look like you’ve seen a ghost, Logan.”

  The smile was slow in coming. When it arrived, she knew that, a thousand oaths to the contrary, she wasn’t any more immune to him now than she’d ever been. Just more intent on resisting.

  Logan forgot all about the incident at the track. All about the death threats. He didn’t know why she was here, and he didn’t care. Those were all details that would somehow take care of themselves. He just wanted to look at her.

  “The Ghost of Christmas Past,” he answered, surprised that he could sound so calm when all he could think of was taking her into his arms and holding her to him. He knew he couldn’t. He’d lost that right. And there wasn’t a damn thing he could do about it. That would require begging forgiveness, and he didn’t beg.

  Even when he wanted to.

  In spite of himself he ran his eyes over her. memorizing, remembering. “What are you doing here?”

  Jessica reminded herself that this was the man who had ripped out her heart and then not even offered her a Band-Aid to stop the bleeding. It galvanized her resolve. She hardened her gaze.

  “Funny, I was just asking myself the same thing.”

  There was fire in her eyes. He could remember when she felt like fire in his arms. An all-consuming fire. He missed that. Missed her.

  “And what did you hear yourself answering?”

  Her chin rose. “Save the charm, Logan. I’m not wet behind the ears anymore.”

  “As I recall, your ears were deliciously dry. And deliciously tempting.”

  Albert was right. It was a setup. She had no idea why, and for once, didn’t want to solve the puzzle and find her answer. She just wanted to leave.

  “And remarkably good at hearing things,” she retorted crisply, promising herself she wouldn’t lose her temper. “Like the word goodbye. If you’ll excuse me,” she said, turning to leave, “this was a mistake.”

  Mistake.

  The word jumped up at him, hoary and full of nettles. He wanted to call to her, to tell her that he’d been the one to make the mistake, a horrible mistake that he was paying dearly for.

  But the words wouldn’t come out now any more than they had then.

  The door behind him flew open, and he heard his brother call out, hurrying to stop her, “Jessica, please, don’t go. Come in.”

  For once, Logan thought, his brother’s timing and his words were perfect.

  Chapter 2

  Jessica paused on the bottom step, undecided. Though she tried to look only at Dane, she was acutely aware of Logan’s presence. Blocking him out had never been an easy trick.

  Go, get out now, while you still can, her mind begged her.

  “I don’t know, Dane. Maybe you’d better—”

  Dane’s eyes implored her to reconsider as he hurried down the three stone steps to her. Standing beside Logan, he seemed like a pale, unfinished version of his younger brother.

  He spared one glance at Logan before taking Jessica’s hand. “He was just leaving, weren’t you, Logan?”

  The smile that came to Logan’s lips was slow, thoughtful. He didn’t know what was going on, but he dealt himself in. “No, actually, I was just arriving.”

  Logan remained where he was, his eyes sweeping over Jessica. It was almost painful, he realized, being so close to her. The last thing he needed was pain.

  “But I can be leaving again,” he agreed amiably. “If that’s what you want.” The last sentence was addressed to Jessica.

  Feeling a little as if he was hurling his body onto a field full of live ammunition, Dane placed himself strategically between Jessica and Logan.

  “Maybe for now, you should.” Dane smiled hopefully at Jessica. “If Jessica decides to help, she can always get to you.”

  “She already has,” Logan murmured. Turning on his heel, he withdrew and disappeared behind the house.

  But for Jessica, his words remained, hovering in the air, marking his place. Logan always knew how to make an exit. Knew just what to say to light a fire. She squared her shoulders. Or to dampen a flame. Jessica seriously doubted Logan had ever said an accidental word in his life.

  Placing his hand on her elbow
, Dane gently coaxed Jessica around and then up the steps leading into the house. For her part, she congratulated herself on not looking over her shoulder toward where Logan had disappeared, even though she was strongly tempted.

  Dane closed the front door behind them. Jessica took a deep breath, bracing herself for the onslaught of memories. She’d spent too much time here not to encounter them.

  “I really was going to leave, you know,” she told Dane as he joined her, “just before you opened the door and came out.”

  Dane nodded. “I know.” He indicated the library and began to lead the way. “Lucky for me I got there just in time.”

  He made her smile. She’d always liked Dane. But that didn’t mean she was going to allow him to blindly lead her down the garden path.

  “If you’re trying to flatter me, Dane, don’t. There’s nothing I can do that a score of other detectives can’t.” She knew of several she could recommend, none of whom came with the history she did.

  Once in the library, Dane began to close the door, then thought better of it. He remembered the night he’d seen her fleeing from this room, tears glistening on her cheeks. She hadn’t seen him and he’d remained where he was until he’d heard the front door slam shut, unable to offer words of comfort. It was the only time he’d ever called his brother a damnable ass.

  He left the door open, sensing she’d feel better that way. “I don’t know about that,” he contradicted politely. “You can stay close to Logan.”

  It was the last thing she wanted to do. And it was far from an exclusive trait. “Any hot little number wearing a size too small can do that.”

  The harsh note in her voice surprised her as much as it obviously did Dane.

  “I never thought I’d see you bitter, Jessica. Did he hurt you that much?” he asked softly.

  So much for keeping a poker face. Jessica raised her chin as she straightened her shoulders. She’d let her guard drop. That was inexcusable, even if Dane was an old acquaintance.

  “Worse,” she admitted. “I let him hurt me that much.”

  That was the worst part of it, that she had allowed Logan to break her heart when she’d known exactly what he, what men who dallied in this world she made her way through, were like. Her own father had had more mistresses, both during his marriage to her mother and after, than she could ever have hoped to keep track of.