This Heart for Hire

by Marie Ferrarella

  She had no idea how to read him. “Are you being literal or is that a euphemism?”

  Once, it might have been the latter, Logan thought. But no more. And that was the pity of it. Cynthia’s father, though full of the best intentions, had turned her into exactly what the old man had dreaded.

  “She’s strange. Not dangerous strange,” Logan clarified when he saw the light entering her eyes. “Eccentric strange. Too much medication mixed in with years of mind-numbing therapy.” He remembered the stories. For a pocket of time, his father had even gone out with Cynthia. “She was a wild child.” Part was hearsay, and part he had gotten firsthand. “She loved to aggravate her father.” He glanced at Jessica, wondering how much she could relate to. Her own father had ignored her for the most part, a lot like Cynthia’s father had ignored her. But with a world of difference as to the results. “The usual, boring, poor-little-rich-girl thing,” he explained, seeing her puzzled expression. “Except that where Cynthia was concerned, she made eradicating boredom an art form.”

  Jessica wondered if it was her imagination, or if she detected a touch of sadness in Logan’s voice as he continued.

  “When she ran afoul of the law, her father supposedly greased a lot of palms to make the offense go away. He made her go away, too. Sent her off to some fancy clinic_ Dane heard they used shock treatment on her. I don’t know that for a fact, except that she does act a little vacant, but then, she was never there a hundred percent to begin with.” A smile tugged on his mouth. “When she was younger, she believed in experimenting with whatever recreational drug was out there for the getting. I think she called it ‘experiencing’ but the bottom line’s the same. She was messed up long before she was sent away.” And that was the pity of it. It was a waste of what could have been a beautiful human being.

  He looked at Jessica, knowing what she was waiting to hear. “But she’s harmless enough. Why, do you think she’s responsible for the letters?”

  Jessica reached for her suitcase again. “Worth a look.”

  He beat her to it and reclaimed the valise. He wondered what was taking Julia so long. The housekeeper should have been here by now.

  “I doubt if Cynthia knows how to operate a computer to get it to print anything.” He dismissed the idea as completely absurd. “Not her generation or her calling.”

  Was he being defensive of the woman? Why? “Well, I have to start somewhere.”

  He thought it an odd place to begin. Cynthia wouldn’t have been his first choice by any means. “You intend to question everyone on the board?”

  She had to do something. “That’s the plan until a better one comes up.”

  “What about my body?” He looked at her with an innocence that almost worked. If it hadn’t been Logan.

  She stared at him. “Excuse me?”

  He was tempted to drop the suitcase and just pull her to him. Which was why he continued holding the valise. “Aren’t you supposed to guard it? Or have you figured out how to be two places at once?”

  These were the times when she sorely missed having a partner, the way Kade did at ChildFinders. Someone to work with her and pick up the slack.

  “Not yet. But you can come with me.” It was the only viable solution.

  “Jessica, I’m shocked.” With dramatic flair, he splayed his hand over his chest. “I’m a working man, I can’t just cut out when the whim moves me.”

  It was all she could do not to laugh in his face. He didn’t actually think she’d believe that, did he? “Since when?”

  He thought of his life before his father’s death. So much wasted time. So many opportunities not taken. He’d hardly known his father until the end. And hadn’t really realized how important their company was to the future of space exploration. That was when he’d decided to take an active interest, an active part. It was never too late to make amends.

  At least in some cases.

  “Since I decided that being on a permanent vacation devalued the experience,” he told her.

  She tried to read between the lines. Was there more going on? Even at his least complicated, Logan had never been an easy man to understand.

  “In other words, you have to do a little work in order to be able to go on vacation?”

  Logan grinned. “Something like that” He casually shrugged his shoulders to underscore his point. “Besides, the company does have my name on it. Maybe it should have a little of my sweat in it, too.” He saw the incredulous expression come over her face. “What’s the matter, Jessi? You look surprised.”

  “I guess I am.”

  He thought of the few serious conversations they’d had. The few that he had allowed to take place. For the most part he’d never wanted anything serious to enter into any of the relationships he’d had. Seriousness was the first step to a place he’d never wanted to inhabit. His father’s example was one he’d wanted to avoid at all cost. He’d wanted to remain invincible and invulnerable, needing no one but himself.

  So what had gone wrong?

  “This is what you always wanted me to be like, isn’t it?” he asked.

  “I never told you what to do.”

  Jessica never would have presumed to do that. At the time, she’d loved everything about him just the way he was. It was only in the deepest part of her heart that she wished he was a little more serious, a little more dedicated to something other than having a wonderful, carefree time.

  “No,” he granted, reaching out to run his hand lightly along her face. Her skin still felt soft. And enticing. “But underneath, I knew you thought I was just a wee bit too devil-may-care and rootless to suit that Anglo-Saxon work ethic beating within that gorgeous chest of yours.”

  She felt herself growing warm. That wasn’t part of the job description. “You’re digressing.”

  He looked deep into her eyes and realized he wasn’t as afraid as he’d once been. Realized, too, that the adoration he’d seen there once was gone now. He felt the pang of loss. “I only wash I could.”

  Jessica took a deep breath, but she didn’t pull back her head the way she knew she should. She hadn’t the strength for anything but a warning. “This isn’t going to work if you don’t play by the rules.”

  He feathered his fingers through her hair. “Couldn’t we make them up as we go along?”

  “Logan...” Her voice was a warning.

  His was a whisper that sent currents of longing through her. “Jessica...”

  “I’m serious.”

  He sighed, dropping his hand to his side. Retreating for the time being. “Yes, I know you are. All right, I’ ll be good.”

  She laughed, but it was a soft sound. “That’ll be the day.”

  Logan leaned closer to her, though there was no one around to hear. “As I recall, you once thought I was very good.”

  And then the cavalry arrived, wearing sensible shoes, and a long navy dress to hide legs that Jessica knew were slightly bowed. Julia Maypole smiled at her, transforming a plain, well-lined face into a pretty one.

  Greeting her warmly, Julia reached for the suitcase on the floor beside Logan. “Will you be staying in the green room, Miss Jessica?”

  Logan shook his head, changing his mind about the arrangements. “No, put Miss Jessica’s things in the room next to mine, Julia.”

  That was far too close for comfort. The first time she’d stayed here, she’d been in the room next to Logan’s. For all of ten minutes. After that, she’d stayed in his. “The green room will be fine, Julia.”

  Julia looked at Logan for confirmation.

  He played his only card. “I’m just thinking of the job, Jessi. Aren’t you supposed to stick close to me at all times?”

  Suddenly he was worried? That would be the day. “Down the hall is close enough.”

  He nodded to Julia, giving his permission. Then, turning to Jessica, he pretended to sigh. “So near and yet so far.”

  He looked so comical and so damn appealing at the same time, she couldn’t help laughi
ng. “You really are impossible.”

  Her reaction pleased him. “You used to laugh just like that when you said it.”

  The recollection surprised her. “You remember?”

  He took her hands into his. “I remember a lot more than you know.”

  And she would be a fool if she believed that. The temptation to be a fool struggled hard to surface. It lost the battle. For now. “All right, let’s get started.”

  The chuckle rumbled deep in his chest. “I thought you’d never ask.”

  Hearing him laugh still affected her. She wasn’t pleased about it. “Logan, I mean going to question Cynthia.”

  He knew that was what she meant. Resigned, he nodded, then led her to the front door. “That’ll have to wait, unless your meeting’s after two.”

  She didn’t understand. “Why will it have to wait?”

  “Because I have a meeting to get back to.” He glanced at his watch to confirm the time. He had to be there in less than half an hour. “They should be back from lunch now.”

  Going back to the office in the middle of the day wasn’t like him. For that matter, neither was going to the office, period. “Then why did you come back here?”

  “I wanted to be here to welcome you. Call me nostalgic.”

  His smile went straight to her core. The struggle to remain detached continued. “You don’t have a nostalgic bone in your body.”

  He winked at her the way he used to. She experienced the same reaction. Damn, this was going to be difficult, she thought.

  “Why don’t you examine me later and see?”

  She decided to ignore the comment completely. “I’ll have to call Cynthia from your car phone.”

  He laughed, opening the front door for her. “Spoilsport.”

  When they finally arrived at the Darrow residence, it was closer to six o’clock than not. Logan’s meeting had run over, and Jessica had had to leave the meeting at one point to reschedule.

  Though less impressive than Logan’s estate, the house was still far beyond what the average man could aspire to. She thought of her own modest house and felt almost homesick. The house had a stale scent to it the moment the door was opened to admit them. It smelled of rose water, old dreams and dust.

  “You’ll make this short, I trust?” the secretary asked, sounding very much like a protective warden.

  “As short as we can,” Jessica promised.

  To her surprise, Logan grinned at the woman. “Hello Rosie, how is she?”

  “The same.” Only two words, the response was filled with all the warmth that was missing from her voice when she spoke to Jessica.

  The man definitely had a way about him, Jessica thought grudgingly as she followed the woman. Jessica made a mental note to ask Logan where he knew Cynthia’s secretary from.

  The room Cynthia Darrow greeted them in looked like something that belonged in a Victorian novel A stereotypical one at that. Jessica looked around slowly. It seemed as if every square inch was taken up by knickknacks. Knickknacks that vied for space and absorbed dust that refused to be banished.

  Jessica could feel her sinuses protesting the moment she walked in.

  “How nice of you to come.” Blinking several times like a signal whose gears were stuck, Cynthia looked from Jessica to Logan. “Can you stay long?”

  Jessica exchanged looks with Logan. She could see the words I told you so, clearly in his eyes.

  “Not long, Cynthia,” Logan answered. Taking Jessica’s arm, he indicated a small, cleared space on the sofa for her to sit. The rest was taken up by stacks of newspapers. Jessica began to feel that she wasn’t nearly as bad a housekeeper as she thought.

  Rather than compete with the newspapers, Jessica elected to stand. “I just wanted to meet you so I could ask a few questions.”

  Wariness slipped into her gray eyes. Long, limp blond hair framed a face that had once been animated but was now wan. Badly chewed fingernails fluttered at Cynthia’s throat as she pressed her hand there. “Questions? What kind of questions?” Her voice picked up speed. “I don’t like questions. They pry. Are you going to pry?”

  Either the woman had overdosed on Gloria Swanson’s portrayal of the faded screen star in the original version of Sunset Boulevard, or she was everything Logan had said she was. Jessica meant to find out.

  “Mr. Buchanan’s been getting death threats. We were wondering if you might have any idea who would be sending them.”

  She rolled her gray eyes like marbles at Logan. The panic expression relaxed. She looked almost coquettish as she smiled at him.

  “Death threats? Logan, what have you been up to? Have you been misbehaving again? Logan can be very wicked, you know,” she confided to Jessica. “He has quite the reputation.”

  Now there was an understatement. “Yes, I know.” Since the woman appeared to have calmed down, Jessica decided to press a little. “If you could just stop to think for a second—”

  “Think? Oh, but I don’t want to think.” Picking up speed again, Cynthia’s voice galloped from one word to the next, an untamed mustang looking for the one crack in the fencing. “It hurts my head too much to think. Maybe later. Yes, later. Later, I’ll think. Will that be all right? Would you like to see my collection?” she went on without waiting for an answer and obviously losing the thread of her thought. Eagerly she reached for one of the numerous figurines on the massive hutch that stood behind her.

  Logan crossed to her. “No, that’s all right, Cynthia,” he said gently. “We’ll have to take a rain check for now.”

  Her eyes widened. She looked toward the window, staring as if she could see through the drawn draperies. “Rain check? Is it raining? Oh, dear, then I’ll get wet if I go out I shouldn’t go out.”

  Well, this wasn’t going anywhere, Jessica thought. She took the woman’s hand in hers, directing Cynthia’s attention toward her. “Thank you very much for your time.”

  Cynthia nodded vigorously. “Bye, come again when it isn’t raining.” Forgetting them the moment she turned away, she busied herself with her figurines.

  Jessica waited until they had walked out the front door and were out of the secretary’s earshot. The woman had materialized the moment they left Cynthia’s room. “This woman is on the board of directors?”

  “It’s her father’s seat. She has it out of the company’s respect for him.”

  “Does she actually come to vote?”

  He opened the car door for her, then shut it when she got in. “Her lawyer handles the vote.”

  Jessica buckled up. “Then maybe we should be seeing him.”

  Logan followed suit, then turned on the ignition. The Jaguar roared to life “He’s out of the country right now.”

  She looked at him thoughtfully. Why hadn’t he said any of this before they’d left to see Cynthia? “You seem to know an awful lot about her.”

  He passed it off lightly. “You pick up things.” And then he smiled. He’d let this go on far enough. “Besides, I have a soft spot in my heart for her.”

  She’d been aware of that the moment they had walked into Cynthia’s parlor. “Why?”

  He turned out of the estate. Faced with a fork in the road, he made his choice. They went right. “You don’t want to know.”

  She told herself her curiosity only had to do with the case. “Maybe I do.”

  He paused, then went ahead. She’d asked for it. “She was my first.”

  The admission rendered Jessica momentarily speechless. “You seduced her?”

  Logan laughed. “The other way around. Cynthia seduced me.”

  She couldn’t picture Logan with the eccentric, disoriented woman they’d just left. “She’s twenty years older than you.”

  “Ten,” he corrected. “She just looks twenty years older. And she wasn’t always the way she is now.” His smile was tender, his memories more so. “At twenty-four she was really something else.”

  “Twenty-four?” Jessica echoed- “That would have made you—”r />
  He knew exactly how old he’d been. And how truly grateful for the initiation rite.

  “I was just fifteen. It was my birthday.” And Cynthia had called it a birthday present. Both their fathers would have gone into shock if they’d discovered them. But hers had been away in Japan and his had been pleasantly drunk somewhere, beyond caring. “I don’t think Cynthia’s the one who’s responsible for the death threats, Jessi.”

  Obviously. Jessica settled back in the seat, feeling far from calm. “Then why’d you come along?”

  “I didn’t want to argue with you about her. I thought you had to see her for yourself to understand.”

  But there was still something bothering her. “Albert says her finances aren’t as good as they might appear.” And it took money to run that house. The taxes alone had to be monumental.

  “I know,” he said matter-of-factly. “She fell on hard times when her father died. I got her the lawyer and made some arrangements.”

  “Arrangements?” she pressed.

  He sighed. She wouldn’t be happy until he told her all of it. “I set aside some money to take care of her. Just a small trust fund.”

  She’d never thought of him as a Good Samaritan. “You?”

  He glanced at her as he took a turn. “Don’t look so surprised, Jess. Once in a while, even Satan can do a good deed.”

  “I never thought you were Satan.”

  She thought of him as a hell of a lot worse than that and he knew it, Logan thought.

  “You’re insulting my intelligence. Enough investigating for one day,” he told her. “I think dinner is in order. I know this little club—”

  He was taking charge again. After what she’d just discovered, she had to admit she was inclined to let him. At least for the moment. “Do I have any say in this matter?”

  “No.”

  She settled back again. “All right, then let’s go.”

  “Knew you’d see things my way, given time.” He pressed down on the accelerator.

  That was just the problem, she thought. She could always see things his way.