This Heart for Hire

by Marie Ferrarella

“You’re going to regret this in the morning,” she warned.

  “Oh no, not me. I’m a man of no regrets.” The words vibrated against her navel.

  Desire curled through her belly, taking all of her hostage.

  He had no regrets. That meant something to her, but what, she couldn’t piece together right now. Not when her world was being encased in a fresh wave of fire all over again and her brain felt as if it had been turned into a curly fry.

  Wiggling, desperate to make him feel as disoriented, as hungry as she was, Jessica managed to reverse their positions until she was straddling him. “My turn,” she murmured.

  “I’ve always been a firm believer in women’s equality,” he enthused, his voice dropping as she began to weave a little magic of her own on him. He felt his belly quiver as he felt her breath skim along it.

  An eternity later she snaked her way back up and then sealed her mouth to his. They both knew there’d be little-to-no rest before dawn.

  They didn’t care.

  Jessica and Logan had slipped back into heaven on a two-hour pass.

  Morning came, not on tiptoes, but with steelpointed boots, invading, demanding attention. Jessica awoke with a start. Her cell phone was ringing. She began to get up, only to feel Logan’s arm tighten around her, holding her in place.

  “Let it ring.”

  “It might be important.”

  “That’s why you should let it ring.” He’d been awake for the past twenty minutes, content just to lie there beside her, his arm completely numbed, listening to her breath.

  It was a sound he’d missed.

  “But—”

  He wouldn’t let her finish her sentence or her protest. Instead, he did what he’d done last night in the face of possible dissent. He kissed her words away.

  Jessica struggled to pull free. Or thought she did. The skirmish lasted less than a minute and took place in the battlefield of her mind. The fight was lost without a single shot being fired. Aroused, she forgot about the telephone as she sank into his kiss.

  An hour later the struggle resumed. “Logan, we can’t stay here like this all day.”

  “Why not?”

  “Because you have a company to oversee, for one.”

  “Dane’s due back at ten.” He angled around her to read his wristwatch on the nightstand. “He’s there already if his flight got in on time,” he corrected. “He likes taking charge. It makes him nervous when I’m around.”

  His words nagged at her. She caught her lower lip between her teeth. “Logan, did you ever think that maybe it might be Dane?”

  “Might be Dane, what?”

  “Sending those letters.”

  He stopped kissing her shoulder and looked at her. Was she joking? “He’s the one who insisted on bringing you in on this.”

  “I know, I know, but just think about it. He sends the letters, hoping to get you to reverse your decision, then hires me to cover his trail.”

  “And shoots at me? Jessica, he’s a little strange at times, but he’s not homicidal.”

  “Maybe he didn’t shoot at you. Maybe he meant those shots to be over your head. Just to scare you enough to make you change your mind about the merger. You would have done it once, in the blink of an eye.”

  He looked at her thoughtfully. “No, I don’t think I would have. But I guess we’ll never know.” He shifted, inhaling deeply as her fragrance drifted toward him. “You’re wrong about Dane, you know. He was in San Diego last night.”

  “That’s what he said.”

  Logan laughed and shook his head. “What do you intend to do, interrogate him?”

  She knew he found the whole idea amusing, but she was still in the beginning stages of the investigation and it frustrated her.

  “Check out to see if he was where he claimed to be, for openers. He didn’t have to be the one doing the shooting, you know,” she pointed out. “He could have hired someone.”

  “Trust me, Dane doesn’t know those kinds of people. He flinches at a raised voice. You’re barking up the wrong tree.” Logan shifted toward her, lightly cupping her breast. “Speaking of barking, how’s your bite?”

  She pushed away his hand, though she felt herself weakening for the umpteenth time. There wasn’t nearly as much force behind the movement as there might have been. “Logan, we have to get up.”

  Undaunted, he moved his hand lower, caressing her belly. The slight increased intake of breath was all the sign he needed. “Why? It’s your job to protect me, right?”

  He could make it harder to think than any man she’d ever met. “Right.”

  The smile that was on his lips seemed to feed down to his fingertips as he stroked her. “And you have to admit, I’m really safe here, right?”

  She was breaking every single damn rule in her book. “Right, but—”

  “Then you’re doing your job.” The last words echoed along her lips as he kissed her.

  She knew she should resist. But the thought couldn’t quite seem to take root.

  Chapter 11

  Logan, what happened shouldn’t have happened.”

  The last forty-five minutes were a rushed blur that had passed through Jessica’s brain without leaving any telltale markers behind. She’d summoned all her self-restraint to keep from opting for an entire day spent in bed. That was fantasy. This was reality, and the sooner she regained her hold on it, the better for her.

  He followed her out to the driveway. “Why? Did I do it wrong?”

  Without hesitation, Jessica went to her car. The choice she was silently offering him was obvious. Either he went with her, or they went in two separate cars.

  There were always vehicles at his disposal—one of the perks of his position. After a beat, Logan slid into the passenger side of her car.

  “No, you didn’t do it wrong.” Jessica glanced in his direction so quickly his image hardly registered. Yesterday they’d taken his car, and she preferred hers. She was surprised, however, that he hadn’t put up a fuss. Maybe some things about him had changed. Once, Logan had to be behind every wheel. Cars had represented control to him. “You did it perfectly, as if you needed to be told—”

  “I do.” Reflexes almost had him reaching in the wrong direction for his seat belt. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d ridden in the passenger seat. “When it comes to you.”

  Pausing at the black iron gates, she saw Neil peer out of the security booth, then press the controls. The gates drew apart. “But not the others?”

  He was trying to pay her a compliment. That of all the women alive, she was the only one who could shake his world, make him reevaluate his priorities. . Why was she blocking it?

  “The thought isn’t supposed to go that way,” he protested.

  “Why?” The promise of a magnificent afternoon lingered on the blush of a perfect morning. Jessica could feel her mood lifting even as she tried to remain serious. “Where is it supposed to go?”

  Been there, done that, Logan thought, although never with Jessica. He’d never had words with her. They’d always seemed to be in sync, in harmony, even from the very beginning. Which was where part of the terror lay. But he understood that now. He hadn’t then.

  He turned toward her. The seat belt gave very little. “Jessi, let’s not ruin it by arguing.”

  She took the winding course to the main road a little too fast. Realizing what she was doing, Jessica pressed down on the brake, riding it a moment until the speed leveled off.

  “That’s what I’m trying to tell you, Logan.” Better she said it than he. “There is no ‘it.’ What happened last night has no strings, no significance—”

  It amazed him how some words could actually feel as if they were piercing his skin. “I think it had a lot of significance.”

  No, don’t go there, Jessi, came her cautioning thought. There’s nothing there for you. No party favors, no surprises—except for the worst one.

  Stepping on the brake, she turned toward him. This time the look
Jessica spared him was long. And penetrating.

  “I would have believed that—once.”

  That hurt him even more. To feel that she had changed that much. “But not now.” It wasn’t a guess on his part.

  “No,” Jessica said softly, almost to herself. “Not now.”

  Because the silence she knew would follow would be too much for her to endure, she reached for the radio and switched it on. A love song was playing.

  Can’t get a break, can I? she thought impatiently.

  Logan turned the radio down. He wanted to be able to hear her. And didn’t want her to pretend that she didn’t hear him.

  “Did I do that, Jessi? Did I kill that in you?” Guilt twisted a knife in his gut. Whatever she said, Logan knew the truth. That it was his fault. “That innocence, despite the sophisticated life-style existing around you? That idealism I saw shining in your eyes? Did I kill it?”

  The denial hovered on the tip of her tongue. She wanted to say no, that he hadn’t meant that much to her to have killed anything, but it was a lie, and lies were things she never could abide. Especially not when the lie was only to help her save face.

  “Yes, you did.” Her voice was cold, detached. “And it’s something you’re going to have to live with. Now can we table this discussion?”

  He doubted that he could anytime soon, at least not within the recesses of his mind. She’d said, in essence, that last night had meant nothing. And how many times had he wished for women who felt exactly that way? That the lovemaking between them was time pleasantly spent, but then it was time to move on.

  So here it was, his wish come true. And he didn’t want it.

  Be careful what you wish for. The old saying mocked him.

  Masking his reaction, Logan shrugged absently. “You’re the one who brought it up.”

  Yes, she supposed she had. Jessica kept her face forward, afraid of what he might see if she turned toward him.

  “Only to make sure you didn’t think that I was naive enough to hold you to anything because of what happened. It shouldn’t have happened because I’m your bodyguard and that’s where it ends.”

  He knew he should just let it lie, but he couldn’t. This was Jessica, and he couldn’t. “I thought you were my friend, as well.”

  The short laugh that escaped sounded little more than a huff of air. “Yes, I thought that, too, once.”

  But friends didn’t just stand there, not saying any-thing, when their friend just had their heart ripped out in front of them, she thought angrily. Friends comforted, shared. Cared.

  He blew out a breath, dragging a hand through his hair. Nobody to blame but himself, he thought. “So, here we are.”

  “Yes, here we are.” Nowhere. She turned toward him at the light. “Now, what’s on your agenda today?”

  He tried to read her tone and found that he couldn’t. He used to know her so well, now...

  “I’d say getting you to change your mind, but that doesn’t look very promising. So let’s just leave it at going in to the office for now.” His eyes strayed to the digital clock on the dashboard. He had less than an hour to spare. But every minute he’d “lost” had been well worth it. “I have a meeting at eleven to try to drum up some support for the vote.”

  Grateful for the neutral topic, she leaped at it. “You really are serious about this, aren’t you?” Who would have ever thought that he was dedicated to a cause other than his own pleasure? It still amazed her.

  Why was she having so much trouble accepting that? he wondered. Other people might have difficulty seeing him in this light, and he understood that, but not Jessi. She should have understood. He was seeing the situation through her eyes. Thinking about the legions of people who made it possible for him to be where he was.

  He could still remember the look on Dane’s face when he’d told him that he was opposing him on the merger. Total disbelief and shock. In a way, it did make him smile.

  “I said so, didn’t I?”

  She glanced at him to see if he was getting defensive. Big mistake. A wink met her full blast and curled straight into her belly. Jessica turned away and concentrated on the road.

  “You’ve been known to say a lot of things, but I guess I still have trouble picturing you championing any cause that requires more than a small drop of effort on your part.”

  He had that coming, Logan thought. He’d spent the first three-quarters of his life being the consummate carefree playboy.

  Logan spread his arms as much as he could within the confines of the car. “Welcome to the new-and-improved Logan Buchanan.”

  A smile tugged on her lips. From where she sat, this side of last night, Logan didn’t need any improvement, at least, not in some respects. “So who’s going to be at your meeting?”

  He’d put the calls in himself, doing away with the impersonal touch—and not allowing his quarry a chance to tender a negative response to his secretary. Logan recited their names.

  “Why?”

  Familiar with all five, she’d already reviewed their financial records and all the other tidbits Albert had managed to pull from various databases, many of which thought themselves secured. Nothing had come to light. And nothing took the place of the personal touch.

  “Because I’d like to sit in on it. Observe them. Sometimes body language says things that credit reports don’t.”

  Logan started to demur on principle, then thought better of it. It wouldn’t hurt to have her there. Or anywhere for that matter as long as it was close by.

  “And you think one of them might be sending me poison-printer letters?” He thought of the people who were attending. The very idea of one of them being a threat made him laugh.

  “Very droll.” Approaching the building, she headed for the underground parking structure. “I’m trying everything I can think of.”

  The look Logan gave her was intense enough to make Jessica glance in his direction. “So am I, Jess. So am I.”

  She walked into his inner office ahead of him. The first thing that caught her attention was the fax machine on the desk that he’d had brought in for her. There were reams of paper spilling out in front of it. Some had found their way to the floor.

  Logan whistled. “Looks like the fax machine gave birth overnight ” He silently wondered if whoever was threatening him had changed their approach.

  Stooping, Jessica picked up the batch closest to her and leafed through them. The lab reports were in. Nothing useful, just as she’d thought. “They’re all for me. From Albert.”

  “That would have been my guess.” He unlocked his desk, glancing at the pile of mail on top of it. Were there any new messages? “Must miss you.”

  With an armload pressed up against her, Jessica rose to her feet. Albert had found more databases to hack into. “They’re the reports he’s been researching on the members of the board.”

  Flipping through his own mail, he looked in her direction. “All their innermost secrets. Makes a man feel naked.” None. There were no new letters from his friendly neighborhood terrorist-wanna-be. Breathing an inward sigh of relief, Logan dropped the letters back on his desk. “Speaking of naked—” He glanced toward the sofa.

  She remembered. Remembered vividly. A hint of color, equal parts pleasure and embarrassment, crept up her neck. Jessica sincerely doubted that there was any familiar flat surface in the nearby vicinity that they hadn’t made love on. He’d brought her here to his office under the pretext of showing her where he worked, when he worked—which was whenever the spirit moved him. That afternoon the spirit had moved him in a far different direction.

  To this day, the touch of Italian leather against the back of her thighs brought a pleasurable tingle to her flesh.

  Pressing her lips together, Jessica sighed. She found it very difficult to stick to her convictions, when Logan was weaving his way under her skin this way at will. “I doubt very much if the board members would like having you conduct the meeting naked.”

  He laughed. �
��Amos Talbot might.” He knew for a fact that Amos fervently adhered to a very different life-style than he himself embraced.

  Deliberately blocking her mounting feelings and the fact that her body still felt the lingering glow of their lovemaking earlier that morning, Jessica hugged the considerable pile of papers to her. “I have to call Albert.”

  He knew she was retreating. Maybe it was for the best, actually, he decided. Too much was happening again. Just like the last time. Then it had been a matter of too much too soon. He’d been overwhelmed by Jessica, by his feelings for her. Now, having tried to deny how much he’d missed her and finally coming to grips with it, he found he had things to re-sort in his mind before he could straighten everything out.

  Maybe a breather was in order for both of them.

  Logan nodded as she sat down at her desk. He took his own seat.

  “You do that.” There were notes to review, figures to look over before the meeting. He never liked showing up unprepared for any contingency.

  Trying to concentrate only on what she had to do, Jessica tapped out the numbers to her office. She winced as she heard a loud noise on the other end. Albert had picked up on the first ring and started talking immediately before she had a chance to say hello.

  “No, I don’t know where she is, Mr. Deveaux, any more than I knew five minutes ago—”

  What was he doing, shouting her father’s name into the phone? “Albert?”

  “Oh, it’s you.” Sarcasm and relief divided up ownership of the sentence. “The missing private investigator. Nice of you to check in with those you left behind in the trenches.”

  Colorful didn’t begin to describe Albert, she decided. She tried to arrange the piles he’d faxed into something manageable.

  “I see you’ve been busy. It looked as if the fax machine had exploded when I walked into the office. Anything pertinent I should be looking at?”

  “No new discoveries.” He dashed her budding hopes with the offhanded comment. “But I thought you might want to read the reports for yourself—if you can tear your eyes away from tall, dark and handsome long enough to actually focus your pupils.”