In For a Pound

by Joselyn Vaughn

  Her mom heaved a stack of dishes from the cart to the counter beside the sink. “You can’t avoid her forever,” she mumbled into Sidney’s ear.

  “I’m hoping to stall until there is less than half the church as an audience.” Sidney dipped the wash cloth into the scalding water and scrubbed a handful of forks.

  Penny returned to the church kitchen with another cart filled with dirty dishes from the all-church potluck.

  “Looks like we had a good turnout,” Sidney said as she eyed the mountain of plates stacked beside her. She had volunteered for kitchen duty to avoid an evening of uncomfortable conversations, regarding her breakup with Colin. On the off chance Joshua showed up, she could plead busyness and not have to face the consequences of their kiss and the delightful date—could you call it that?—at the ice cream social. Whatever those might be: a skin burning blush, awkward eye contact, or the irresistible urge to lock lips again.

  Penny collected some plastic plates and spooned leftovers onto them. “Joshua and Buck didn’t make it tonight, so I’m going to drop off some leftovers.”

  “Great idea.” Sidney’s mom carried a couple more half empty dishes over to Penny, who scraped the leftover casseroles onto the plates.

  “That should help tempt Buck’s appetite. Joshua said he hasn’t been eating much.” Sidney returned to her vigorous scrubbing when two sets of inquiring eyes swung her way. “He brought a couple pairs of jeans into the shop a few weeks ago.”

  Only the sound of Penny’s spoon clattering against a glass dish filled the silence. The reception hall had cleared out, leaving them alone to clean up the kitchen.

  “Has Colin finally gotten the hint?” Penny asked as she deposited the freshly-scraped dish in Sidney’s pile.

  “He’s only called twice since I threw the ring into the yard.” Sidney allowed the rinse water to drip off a pan before placing it in the drying rack. “I think he was trying to sell me Rough Diamond stuff though. I didn’t listen to the whole voice mail.”

  “He certainly searched the grass long enough for the ring. Any longer and he’d wear out his pants crawling through the yard.” Penny tore a strip of plastic wrap from the roll and wrestled it around a potluck plate of leftovers.

  “Probably figured he could pawn it and invest more in that Rough Diamond crud.” Sidney rinsed some silverware and dropped it into the strainer. “You know that money he borrowed from me?” She made soapy quotes around borrowed. “If this Rough Diamond thing is supposed to be such a great investment opportunity, why didn’t he give me a penny more than he took? I don’t know if he kept the phenomenal return on my money or there wasn’t one.”

  “He used your money, but didn’t cut you in on the profits?” Penny gasped.

  “Just another red flag in the field.” Sidney grabbed another stack of plates. “But whatever. I wasn’t expecting the money anyway. I don’t know how I didn’t see this coming.”

  “Sometimes we only see what we want to see, but I think we all missed Colin changing,” her mom said.

  “When did he become so obsessed with money and how things looked?” Penny stuffed the plates in the refrigerator. “Changing all the wedding plans to some fancy shindig. You had such a sweet wedding planned.”

  “He was such a hard worker. I interpreted it as wanting to do a good job. Maybe that wasn’t the case.” The warm dishwater soothed her nerves and loosened her tongue. “He wouldn’t say he loved me at the end.”

  The scraping and clattering of dishes halted. The silence was like a thousand questions pummeling her. She couldn’t resist the urge to fill the opening with all the details weighing on her chest.

  Sidney scratched at a particularly crusty spot on a casserole dish. “I expected the charm, but he couldn’t pull it off. That’s when I knew our relationship was over. That I didn’t know him at all.”

  “He had us all duped,” her mom said.

  “I felt numb, but I don’t know. I haven’t had normal reactions to any of this. When I called the wedding off, I didn’t feel disappointed.” She grabbed a wad of steel wool from the counter top and attacked the spot. “I felt relieved.”

  Penny and her mom stared at her. And then it hit her. “I felt like he was dragging me to something I didn’t want to do.”

  Their towels stopped wiping dishes and dropped to the counter.

  Sidney rinsed the dish and settled it on the drying rack. She kept talking because once the thoughts started flowing they couldn’t be stopped. “I didn’t want to marry Colin. We didn’t want the same thing, but I fooled myself into believing he wanted what I did. The cute little bungalow with the swing set in the back yard and not the mini-mansion in a gated neighborhood.”

  She waved her hand and soap dripped from her wrist to the counter. “But he was just nodding and smiling and planning something else. I guess I always knew it.” She dunked the next dish in the soiled water. “Then the whole thing with Joshua and throwing up all over his truck.” She wiped the steel wool over the dish, then doused it with hot water.

  At the mention of Joshua’s name, any pretense of drying dishes ended. Her mom and Penny rushed over to the sink, their eyes wider than the saucers Sidney washed.

  “I thought I barfed because I was betrayed by Colin and hurt he didn’t care, but it was really that this future I’d pictured for myself — for us — wasn’t going to happen. And Joshua seems so perfect. He’s considerate, handsome, and when we kissed—wow!”

  Since the two listeners’ eyes couldn’t get any bigger, their jaws hit the floor.

  “You what?” Penny gasped.

  “In the waiting room,” Sidney said. “All strange. Then at the ice cream social, he acted like the kiss never happened. We had a great time, talked forever, but then he left.”

  “Just left?” Penny echoed.

  Sidney shrugged. “After the social, we went our separate ways. No ‘see you later’s or anything. I imagined we had a connection, but maybe I’m not… maybe I’m seeing things that aren’t there. I don’t think I’m ready to risk loving the wrong person again. My dreams of a home and family may never happen.”

  Her eyes were stinging, and she blinked, rubbing her foamy hand against them, then screamed, “Soap in my eye!”

  Her mom found a clean washcloth in one of the drawers and wet it under the faucet. She pressed it to Sidney’s eyes and held her shoulders while Sidney cried.

  Penny came to the other side of the sink. “Those dreams aren’t gone. They just aren’t going to be the way you imagined them.” She spread her soaked towel over the oven handle. “I have a feeling there are better things in store for you.”

  ****

  Joshua’s pulse skipped and tripped every time the door to the exam rooms opened. The hushed music piped in over the intercom only served to magnify his agitation. He couldn’t hear enough of the notes to put the whole melody together, so it sounded like discordant chimes and grated his nerves with each note. His dad, however, seemed unperturbed.

  He fiddled with his watch as his dad paged through a two-month-old sports magazine. “How can you sit there so calmly?”

  His dad flipped the page in the magazine to a spread of a female tennis player. He raised his eyebrows. “I’ve already heard the worst news. This is either good news or the same news.”

  Joshua rubbed his hands across his pant legs and pondered the man’s wisdom. “So things will be better, or they’ll be the same.”

  “Pretty much.” He flipped the page to another photo collage of the tennis player. “How’s the house coming?”

  “The real estate agent says I’ll be closing tomorrow. Once the keys are mine, I’ll work on loading the garage with all the supplies I need to start work. Once I have everything ready, I’ll fix stuff up before I move in.”

  “Good plan. Be good to get the outdoor stuff done before winter.”

  While snow was more than likely a few months away, Joshua couldn’t find a problem with that logic. He’d rather work outside in comfortable
weather. “The steps and the front porch need the most repairs. I’ll probably have to pour new cement footings for the supports.”

  “I have an old cement mixer in the shed. Might need to chip some crud out of it though.”

  “The lumber yard said I could rent one, but I’ll check it out.” How long was this going to take? They’d been stewing here for—Joshua glanced at the clock—a whole five minutes. He huffed. If he could walk around, the waiting wouldn’t be as frustrating. The room was too small for a good pacing circuit.

  His dad shifted in his seat and drummed his fingers against his knees. Maybe Joshua wasn’t the only one agitated. “Did you hear if Sidney found a partner for the last canoe race?”

  Joshua felt like he watched a tennis game with the speed at which the topics of conversation bounced back and forth. At Sidney’s name, his heart did one of those flip-flop things. Their kiss and what it meant, or didn’t, flooded his head. Were they going somewhere, or was it the impulse of the moment? He didn’t know. Well, he knew what he wanted, but did he dare risk what he needed to get it? “Haven’t heard.”

  His dad flipped another page in the magazine, this time to a male basketball player. “It’s a shame Colin teamed up with Missy. Colin never was anything to write home about, but Missy is just plain bad news.”

  “She’s done worse things than leave dog doo on people’s doorsteps?”

  “Nothing’s ever proven,” his dad lowered his voice. “But nobody knows how she affords that fancy car of hers.”

  Joshua remembered Colin and his Rough Diamond sales pitch. Maybe she had a hand in the scheme. “Have you heard of Rough Diamond?”

  “That marketing scam they advertise on late night TV?”

  Seemed appropriate. Joshua shook his head “Most likely. Sidney’s ex is gung-ho about it.”

  “Too bad. I’m glad she dumped him. Sidney deserves better.” His dad slid a sideways look toward Joshua.

  Joshua recognized that look. Like Joshua could do anything about the situation. Best to get him to spill his theory, and Joshua could put the kibosh on the whole thing. Unless the idea had merit… “What are you insinuating?”

  “You’ve bought a house. You’re taking a more settled job. She’s here. You’re here. What could be simpler?”

  All the pieces Aunt Penny had talked about were there. A house, his family, but was it enough to keep him settled? Four walls and windows could be smashed when the next storm brewed.

  “Buck Pounds,” the nurse called before he could answer.

  They crowded into the narrow exam room. While the nurse took blood pressure and temperature, Joshua puzzled through his dad’s comment about him and Sidney being in the same place at the same time and that being enough. Somehow it didn’t seem possible. The whole relationship thing couldn’t be as simple as location. He’d seen families fall apart when they lost their houses. Location wasn’t enough.

  The nurse told them the doctor would be with them in a moment.

  When the nurse closed the door quietly behind her, Joshua said, “A marriage isn’t as simple as location. It needs something else to hold it together.”

  “Love. Sometimes it takes time to grow. You need to be together to start it off. It was like that with your mother. I didn’t know that I truly loved her and couldn’t live without her until we had been married for more than a year. We came to depend on each other in that first year. Cleaving to each other.” His voice trailed off in sadness.

  Joshua slid a skeptical glance at his dad. He didn’t remember enough about his mom to know what his parents were like together. Had they been an epic love story? The memories rolled before him like a poorly-spliced filmstrip. His mom and dad with their arms around each other behind a birthday cake, their eyes glowing in the light of his three candles as they joyfully sang. That light disappeared from his dad’s eyes when Aunt Penny came. Joshua had never associated his dad’s sorrowful countenance with the loss of his mother. Looking back, Joshua understood the change. Until now, he’d figured his dad was as fearful of Aunt Penny’s grand ideas as he was.

  “In that case, she should marry Colin. They’ll grow to love each other, right? Stick them in the same house together for a year, and everything will be hunky-dory.”

  “Only if they are dedicated enough to make it work. They could grow to love each other, but they might only tolerate each other out of stubbornness to see the marriage stick together.”

  Joshua scratched his head. Were the families that fell apart weak to begin with? He didn’t know. He’d only witnessed the aftermath that made an EF5 tornado preferable.

  “It doesn’t work every time, but you and Sidney, I have a feeling. You need some time.” His dad rubbed his arm where the blood pressure cuff had been and twisted in his seat to face Joshua.

  Time. That’s what it was all about. Not enough time. Needed more time. He jerked his head toward the exam room door. He had plenty of time now. This doctor was never coming.

  Wait, didn’t he have all the time in the world? With his investment in the house, he’d be around. He and Sidney would have as much time as they needed to figure this out. He could pursue her as slowly as she needed it to be. Elation and anticipation surged through him like arriving at a site and laying the plans for recovery and reconstruction. How would he win Sidney’s affection? Flowers, chocolates, they wouldn’t do it. What did he need to do to be the man Sidney needed?

  The doctor pushed the door open and shook both their hands before perching on the rolling stool. “How have you been feeling?”

  His dad waved his head side to side. “I’ve been better, but I’ll be doing a lot better when I hear your news.”

  The doctor smiled and flipped open the folder he balanced on his knee. He scanned the top paper, then lifted it to peer at the one beneath. His silence was deafening, and Joshua wanted to rip the paper out of the doctor’s hand to find the answer. Every second meant a delay until he could see Sidney and… what? Who knows? Anything with her. Anywhere with her. Since he’d made a plan, he wanted to get it moving.

  “The blood counts look good, back in the ranges we’d like to see. We’ll continue to monitor things in case we need to do some maintenance treatments. You’ll probably feel a little weak for a few weeks yet, so take it easy. We’ll see you again in about three months for a follow-up.

  “So is this—” Joshua asked.

  The doctor closed the folder and nodded. “Yes, it’s remission.”

  “That’s great. Wonderful.” The weight off Joshua’s shoulders buoyed him to his feet. His dad looked at him like he had a chicken on his head. He couldn’t take this confined space another minute. “I need to um — I’ll meet you outside.” Joshua made crazy hand gestures that made absolutely no sense, and the worst part was, he knew it.

  His phone vibrated, and he yanked it off his belt. The real estate office displayed on the screen, so he thumbed the button to answer it.

  “We’re all set to close,” his agent said.

  “I’ll be right there.”

  Chapter Twenty-two

  Joshua took the keys from the real estate agent. He’d dropped his dad off at home on the way from the doctor’s office to the real estate agent’s office. He and the agent stood in the front yard of the house where the agent had affixed a ‘sold’ sign over the real estate sign. “I thought closing would take much longer.”

  “It usually does when there is financing and mortgage paperwork to take care of. You pay cash, things move quickly.”

  That was one thing about not being tied down anywhere. He bought necessities and stashed the rest of his cash away. There wasn’t room for extra stuff in his trailer. His nest egg had been enough to purchase the bungalow at the foreclosed price with money left over for renovations.

  Joshua bent to pick up the remnants of a candy bar wrapper embedded in the sparse turf and crushed it in his hand. He’d need to arrange for garbage service, transfer all the utilities into his name, and introduce himself to the neighbo
rs. Putting down roots and pursuing a girlfriend? All these changes. Would he recognize himself in the mirror?

  Sidney. Sidney was the reason he was attempting a permanent residence.

  Now, he owned property. The shackles it had always represented didn’t feel as binding as he’d imagined. Before when he’d considered a permanent residence, he couldn’t justify the expense or the risk of loss. His travel trailer had served him fine. Better than fine. It provided the space he needed for his bachelor life. Repairs were minor, no yard work, and if he didn’t like his neighbors, well, he was moving on to the next disaster soon. Everything he needed came with him.

  As a new homeowner, he listed the things he would need to purchase to go with his house. A lawn mower, hedge clippers, shovels, a comprehensive tool box, a snow blower. Previously, that list had him cranking the jacks and hitching the trailer up to his truck. Instead he wondered if there was enough space for all of it in the sagging shed in the back corner of the yard.

  “If you need anything else, let me know,” the agent said and climbed in his car. “Congratulations,” he called as he backed out of the overgrown driveway.

  He tossed the keys into the air and caught them as a car screeched to a halt on the street behind him. He laughed at the urge to mutter about those crazy kids today and shake his fist about tearing up his lawn. He’d been a home owner for all of five minutes, and he’d already morphed into a grumpy old codger.

  He glanced over his shoulder and saw Sidney jump out of her car and dash onto his grass.

  “What are you doing here?” she asked. Her hair had been looped into a bun some time earlier in the day, but now spirals dangled haphazardly out of it. He wished he could run his fingers through them, then pull her into his arms and kiss her like he had at the hospital. Sometime after that he would show her the house, describing the work he planned and the moments he hoped would be in their future.

  “Looking at my new house.” He dangled the keys and stepped to the side, so she could see the sold sticker plastered across the for sale sign.