Hidden Trusts

by Jae

  "Darn, boss, I didn't know you fought in the Mexican War," Charlie said as they set up camp. "You always said you didn't want to fight in a war that was not your own."

  Luke shrugged. "I was young and naive." The war had been the perfect way to join the dragoons without being subjected to careful scrutiny by an army doctor. She had qualified just by being able to ride and shoot. Back then, she had desperately needed the order and discipline the dragoons brought to her life.

  "I knew you were a dragoon in the Mexican War," Phin said. "Nattie told me. But I didn't know you're such a good liar." He lowered his voice so that none of the soldiers would hear.

  Luke gave him a wry smile. If only you knew.

  "Yeah," Charlie agreed. "You almost convinced me that we never met any Indians. But why lie? Why cover for the red bastards who took our horses?"

  "Easy, Charlie." Luke sent him a warning glance. "I didn't like them stealing our horses any more than you, but they weren't out for a fight, so I doubt these are the Indians who killed the soldier. The lieutenant won't care, though. He's out to find some Indians and kill them. He won't care that it's just one warrior with an old man and two women. I don't want to be responsible for their deaths." She pinned Charlie with her gaze until he looked away. "All right. Let's set up camp."

  * * *

  As soon as the young lieutenant retreated into his tent, a pack of cards appeared from one of the saddlebags and a bottle of whiskey circulated among the soldiers.

  Charlie held out his tin cup too.

  Luke didn't stop him. One drink wouldn't matter, and she hoped he had the good sense to refuse more. When a soldier passed her the bottle, she handed it to the man next to her, though. She watched them start a game of cards but didn't join in.

  Even during the Mexican War, she had never been friends with the soldiers in her company. Hiding her gender meant keeping her distance, no matter how lonely it made her. But years ago, she would have joined her companions in a card game and would have laughed at their bawdy jokes, just to fit in. That kind of entertainment didn't hold much interest for her anymore.

  In the past, she had lived her life as a man among other men, and she had lost touch with her female side. But the last seventeen years had been spent sharing her home with three women, and it had changed her. She could still fit in with the men, but she no longer aimed to be like them in every way.

  Now she just wanted to be herself, whatever that was.

  "You all right, boss?" Phin asked from across the fire. He had refused the soldiers' whiskey too.

  "Yeah," Luke said. "Just thinking."

  "Hm, me too." Phin came around the fire and sat next to Luke. "I wonder how things are going at home."

  Luke wondered the same thing on a daily basis. "Well, if your betrothed is even halfway helpful, I think Nora might have gone back to teaching by now."

  "How can you know that?"

  "I know my wife," Luke said. Nora was a practical woman, and if money got tight, she would leave the chores at the ranch to Nattie and Phin's bride and would return to her teaching duties.

  "Do you think Johanna can handle life on a ranch?" In the firelight, Luke saw the concern in his eyes. He had proposed without even knowing his future wife, and now he had no idea if she might make a good ranch wife or not.

  A grin made its way onto Luke's lips when she remembered Nora's early attempts at building a fire or baking bread. "She'll have to learn," she said. "Don't worry. Even if Nora is back to teaching, Amy and Nattie will teach her what she needs to know."

  "Amy giving my future wife lessons in how a ranch wife should behave..." Phin laughed. "Now that's a scary thought."

  Sharp words lingered on Luke's tongue, but she swallowed them. Phin hadn't meant to criticize Amy. Still, it was true that Amy wasn't the kind of woman most men would want as a wife or a role model for their wife. Sometimes, Luke wondered if their upbringing would condemn her daughters, especially Amy, to a life of loneliness.

  Phin tore out handfuls of grass.

  "If you're so worried about Johanna, why did you propose to a woman you don't even know?" Luke asked. "Why not court one of the neighbor girls, someone who grew up on a ranch?"

  "Ah." Phin threw a clump of grass into the fire. "They're silly gooses."

  "All of them? There's not even one woman you like in the whole valley?"

  Phin licked his lips.

  "So there is someone you like." Grinning, Luke hit Phin's shoulder. "Why not propose to her?"

  "I'm not right for her." Phin stared into the fire. "I can't offer her what she deserves."

  "I thought the same when I first met Nora," Luke said.

  Phin still gazed into the flames. "That's different."

  You've got no idea just how different it is.

  "Want me to check on the horses?" Phin asked.

  Luke got up. "No. I'll go." She needed to find a hidden spot to relieve her screaming bladder anyway.

  Protected by the darkness and the sharp ears of the horses grazing nearby, she ducked behind a shrub of sagebrush and relieved herself. When she pulled up her pants and buttoned them, a horse snorted.

  Luke peeked through the branches of the shrub while she closed the last button and rearranged the padding in her pants.

  Two soldiers headed toward the latrine, one of them carrying a shovel. "The lieutenant shouldn't have agreed with Johnson," the taller man said. "Now we're stuck babysitting a bunch of horse breeders instead of finding the damn Injuns who killed Roy."

  "Ah, Moylan is a green officer who hasn't seen any action yet. Every howl of a coyote out here makes him jump." He spat out and hit the sagebrush behind which Luke was hiding. "He was just waiting for a reason to return to the fort."

  "Maybe we should give him a reason not to return to the fort," the other soldier said.

  "How?"

  His friend chuckled. "If we drive off a few of Hamilton's horses and tell the lieutenant they were stolen by Indians..."

  Hot anger shot up in Luke. No one would use her horses for such a plan. The worn grip of her revolver felt soothing against her palm. With a resounding click, she cocked the hammer and stepped out of her hiding place. She smashed her boot onto a few branches.

  The two soldiers whirled around.

  "If even one of my horses goes missing, I'll shoot the two of you," she said.

  "You wouldn't dare," the taller man said. "Our comrades would lynch you."

  Luke just smiled at him. She had learned that it unnerved most men more than shouting ever could. "Oh, only if they think it was me who killed you. I'll tell your lieutenant you were killed by the same Indians who stole the horses you drove off."

  In the silence of the night, the smaller man gulped audibly. "We were just joking about driving off your horses, really."

  "I don't like your brand of humor, Private."

  "It's not our problem if you don't have a sense of humor," the taller soldier said.

  Luke stared him down, knowing he was the instigator. "Then make sure it doesn't become your problem. If all my horses make it safely to Fort Boise, we'll part as friends. If not, you won't be there to regret it."

  The two soldiers stared at her. In the near darkness, Luke couldn't make out their expressions, but she still didn't look away.

  "All right," the tall soldier finally said. "We'll leave the horses alone." He strode away in the direction of the latrine, and his friend followed.

  Luke put her revolver away and stared into the darkness. Great. Instead of enjoying the safety of a cavalry escort, she'd have to sleep with one eye open. She adjusted her pants and walked back to the camp to let Phin and Charlie know.

  Hamilton Horse Ranch

  Baker Prairie, Oregon

  May 14, 1868

  AMY HEAVED HER SADDLE onto her shoulder and carried it out of the stable. When she placed it on Ruby's back, she noticed Hendrika standing in front of the corral where they kept Nugget, Dotty, and the two foals. Her arms rested on the top rail, and he
r chin leaned on her hands. She stared at the horses so intently as if she had forgotten that anything else existed.

  She's really fond of Lucky. And it wasn't just the filly. Amy knew Hendrika visited Cinnamon every night before bedtime, and the way Ruby nickered when she saw Hendrika made Amy think even the "bossy" mare had gotten an apple or two from Hendrika.

  She'll make a good wife for a horseman like Phin. The thought should have been a joyful one since Phin was her best friend, but somehow it wasn't.

  "Hey," she said. "How's Lucky doing?"

  Hendrika whirled around. "Oh. I didn't hear you come up."

  "Mama calls it the 'horse trance.' She often has to drag Papa and me from the stable when we forget about supper." Thinking of Papa made a ball of worry form in her belly. How was he doing, out there on the trail?

  She leaned against the corral rail next to Hendrika and watched the foals.

  Jason, Nugget's golden colt, chased Lucky around the corral. Lucky leaped and bucked. After a while, she trotted to her mother to rest.

  "Wanna go in and say hello?" Amy asked, then instantly rebuked herself. What are you doing? You've got work to do, and you wanted to stay away from Hendrika, remember?

  But now Hendrika looked at her with a hopeful glance. "Could we? Will Dotty and Nugget let us in there?"

  "Sure. We always try to handle the foals from a very young age, get them used to people before they are turned out with the herd." She pointed at the corral. "So, wanna go in?"

  Hendrika nodded.

  "Come on, then." Amy opened the gate and slipped through, then closed it behind Hendrika.

  Instantly, Nugget's colt bolted to the other end of the corral. Lucky peeked out from behind her mother.

  "Dotty," Amy called and made a clicking sound with her tongue.

  Dotty lifted her head. When Amy clicked again, she loped toward them. The filly followed.

  "Hey there, Dotty. I brought a guest to admire your daughter." Amy turned to Hendrika. "Come here and pat Dotty. It'll show the little one that there's nothing to be afraid of."

  She watched as Hendrika reached out a hand and let the mare sniff it, exactly as she had shown her weeks ago. Then Hendrika slid her hand down the long neck to scratch behind Dotty's withers.

  A little nose appeared from behind Dotty. Lucky pranced forward to see what was going on.

  Hendrika held out her hand, palm up. She didn't try to touch the filly or get any closer; she just stood and waited. Amy noticed that she was barely breathing.

  Her own breath caught too. Watching the filly and the young woman watch each other seemed like an endless, magical moment.

  Finally, Lucky took one step forward, then another one. Her nose touched Hendrika's hand, and something, probably the tickling of little whiskers, made Hendrika smile.

  Jason, the palomino colt, followed his mother and trotted over.

  "Oh, now you are being brave after a girl showed you how it's done," Amy murmured while she rubbed his withers.

  Hendrika chuckled. "It seems your family has a history of breeding strong females."

  For the first time, a stranger, someone from outside the family, had commented on how different the Hamilton women were — and made it sound like a compliment, not something to wrinkle her nose at.

  Amy smiled. "I guess we do." She gave the colt one last scratch. "Come on. I need to ride out before it gets dark."

  "Where are you going?" Hendrika asked while she followed her to the gate.

  "I need to check on the other foals, the ones who have already been turned out with the herd."

  When Amy turned to close the gate, she saw the longing in Hendrika's eyes, but Hendrika didn't ask to come with her. She probably remembered the fiasco last time she had ridden out with Amy.

  But four weeks had passed since then, and Hendrika was more used to horses and how they reacted now. Nattie and Mama had taken her riding a few times.

  Amy hesitated. One glance into Hendrika's eyes made the decision. "If you are done with your chores, you could come with me."

  "I don't want to be in the way," Hendrika said.

  "You won't." With no wild mustangs around anymore, Hendrika should be safe. "Just promise me that you'll get off the horse and stay out of the way should something unexpected happen."

  "You won't even know I'm there," Hendrika said.

  I seriously doubt that. Amy was always much too aware of Hendrika's presence, but that was her problem, not Hendrika's. She couldn't make Hendrika feel unwelcome just because she was having those feelings.

  "Come on," she said. "You can help me saddle Cinnamon."

  * * *

  Ten minutes later, Amy cursed herself. Brilliant idea. Why didn't I just saddle the horse and let her watch?

  Now Hendrika wanted personal instructions every step of the way. "Like this?" she asked and rubbed the brush over Cinnamon's back.

  Her eagerness to learn and to help was hard to resist.

  "Longer strokes," Amy said. "Put some muscle into it. You won't hurt him." She stepped closer and reached around Hendrika to take over the brush. Her body pressed against Hendrika's on every brush stroke, making Amy sweat. "See?" Her voice trembled, and she hoped Hendrika wouldn't notice.

  "Yes." Hendrika reached for the brush, and their fingers touched.

  When Amy couldn't stand watching the slender fingers slide over Cinnamon's coat anymore, she pointed to the saddle hanging over the top rail. "Now the blanket and the saddle."

  Hendrika grasped the blanket and placed it on Cinnamon's back, taking care to slide it back in the direction of the hairs, not against it.

  "Who showed you how to do that?"

  "Emmett," Hendrika said while she made sure that the blanket covered Cinnamon's withers. "He's nice. All the ranch hands are very nice to me."

  Of course they are! They are nice to every young, beautiful woman. Amy bit back her comment, though. The boys would be perfect gentlemen. They knew Papa would never stand for anything else. And they respect Phin too much to make unwelcome advances to his betrothed. As Phin's best friend, she should do the same, especially because she was a woman. Admiring another woman that way wasn't right.

  "Do you want me to try saddling him?" Hendrika asked.

  Amy nodded. "Go ahead. Grasp the cantle, the part in the back, with your right hand and the base of the fork with your left hand."

  Hendrika swung the saddle down from the corral rail and stumbled when the weight of the saddle dragged her down.

  "Careful." Amy reached around Hendrika and helped her carry the saddle to Cinnamon.

  "Gracious!" Warm breath brushed along Amy's neck when Hendrika turned her head. "It's a lot heavier than I thought."

  It was. As a child, she had often ridden bareback because the saddle had been too heavy for her to lift on her own.

  "Now place your feet shoulder width apart, and put your left foot forward."

  When Hendrika slid her right foot back to balance herself, her leg brushed Amy's, who was still helping her hold on to the saddle.

  Amy swallowed. "Rock your body back and forth three times." She cursed the breathless tone of her voice. "Gather momentum to heave the saddle up on his back. On the third rock, you swing the saddle up with a twist of your hips."

  Hendrika's hips rocked back and forth against Amy. Heat shot through Amy, and she almost lost her grip on the saddle.

  The saddle landed on Cinnamon's back with more force than planned. He turned his head but otherwise stayed still.

  "Sorry, Cin," Amy mumbled and stepped back, away from Hendrika.

  "Seems I have to practice that some more," Hendrika said.

  Goose bumps broke out all over Amy's body. Not with me, she wanted to shout even though her body screamed something different. "Yeah," she said, her voice scratchy. "Cinnamon would appreciate a softer landing instead of just dropping the saddle onto his back."

  She showed Hendrika how to secure the cinch, taking care not to let their hands brush against each o
ther.

  "All right. Now up you go." She folded her hands to form an improvised ladder for Hendrika. When Rika gathered up her skirt, Amy dropped her gaze to the ground, not wanting to make her think she was staring at her legs. The heat of Hendrika's hand on her shoulder seared through the fabric of her jacket.

  Hendrika finally settled into the saddle, and Amy stepped back and took a deep breath.

  One glance at Hendrika's hands clutching the reins reminded Amy of something. "Oh. Wait." She raced to the tack room, where Mama had hidden Hendrika's new gloves after she had brought them home from town yesterday. Amy had wanted them to be a surprise, but she hadn't found a quiet moment to give them to Hendrika.