Holding Out for a Hero

by Codi Gary

  Slater pushed into the lobby, his smile flashing as he caught sight of them. “Hey, y’all.”

  “Slater.” Blake held his hand out for the other man to take.

  “What’s up, man?” Slater nodded at Bryce. “Meg, you catch the game last night?”

  Bryce said something in response, but Blake was no longer paying attention. Craning his neck around, he tried to see if Hannah had come out of the bathroom yet.

  The waitress called their party’s name, and Bryce patted his shoulder. “That’s us. Do you want to stay here and wait for your friend?”

  Blake hesitated. While getting to talk to Hannah would be great, he kept remembering what Sparks had said about jumping into something before he’d dipped his toes back into the dating pool.

  “Nah, I’ll just talk to her another time.”

  HANNAH WAS DRYING her face off when Nicki pushed into the bathroom.

  “Han, are you okay? What happened?”

  “Nothing, I’m just being an idiot.” And she definitely felt like one, crying over something as silly as a guy she wasn’t even dating. It wasn’t as if she’d never been rejected before.

  Except with Blake, you fooled yourself into thinking there was something between you.

  “Come on, tell me what is going on.” Nicki gave Hannah a big hug, rubbing her back. “Seriously, whose ass do I need to kick?”

  Hannah laughed. “I just saw that guy I like, Blake, and he’s here with another girl.”

  “Oh, babe, I’m sorry. Wanna grab our food and go?”

  “Do you mind?” Hannah asked. “I’m kind of a mess.”

  “Nah, let’s do it. And maybe we can stop by a Redbox and grab a couple of movies to watch. After you tell me all about this mystery man.”

  “Sure, sounds good.”

  “I’m going to change our reservation to a to-go order. Come on out when you feel up to it.”

  “Thanks, Nic.”

  “Hey, best friends are the people you can be a total crazy mess around and who love you anyway. Don’t sweat it.”

  Hannah laughed, rubbing at her eyes as Nicki left the bathroom. She turned to look at herself in the mirror, dabbing at her puffy eyes when the door opened again and the pretty brunette Blake had been cozy with walked in. She caught Hannah’s gaze in the mirror briefly.

  “Hey,” she said casually.

  “Hi.” Hannah’s voice came out as more of a croak, and she suddenly wanted to get the hell out of there.

  She left the bathroom and headed toward the bar, where she found Nicki nursing a margarita. When her friend noticed her, she held the straw out to her. “Want some? It’s going to take about twenty minutes for food, so I figured why not have a drink while we wait.”

  “No, thanks.” She didn’t want to look around in case Blake was close and noticed her.

  “Do you want to go out to the car and wait? I can hang here—”

  “Hey, Hannah.”

  Blake’s voice came from behind her and sent a quiver of awareness down her back. She turned around and gave him a tentative smile. “Hi, Blake. This is Nicki. Nicki, this is Blake.”

  Blake shook Nicki’s hand and turned that knee-jellifying smile back her way. “What brings you ladies out today?”

  “We were shopping all day and decided to swing by and grab food on our way back home,” Nicki said.

  She could feel Blake’s gaze on her, but she avoided his eyes, afraid he’d be able to tell that she’d been crying.

  “Cool, what were you shopping for?” he asked.

  Hannah gave Nicki a panicked look, silently pleading for Nicki to make up something else, anything other than the truth, but her friend ignored her.

  “We’re going to a single ladies’ ball, so we were buying our dresses and accessories.”

  God, Hannah wanted to sink into the floor and die. It was bad enough that Blake could probably tell she’d been crying, but just saying their plans for Valentine’s Day out loud made her want to crawl under the counter and hide. Two grown women getting dressed up like princesses to attend a singles event?

  He probably thought they were both pathetic.

  “A single ladies’ ball? The one at the Hilton?” he asked.

  Hannah’s head jerked up at his question. “Yeah. Why?”

  A slow smile spread across his face. “Because Alpha Dog is putting it on.”

  Her heart pounded so hard it made her wince. “So I guess that means you’ll—”

  “Be there? Yes. Yes, I will.”

  Hannah’s stomach turned. Blake was going to be there to see her all dressed up and looking like a complete idiot. Probably with the beautiful brunette on his arm.

  Faking a smile, she said, “Well, great. It sounds like a lot of fun.”

  Before he could respond, the brunette came up behind him, smiling at Nicki and Hannah apologetically. “Hey, Kline, we’re ready to order. Do you know what you want?”

  “Yeah, sure, I’ll be right there.” When she made no move leave, Blake sighed. “Hannah and Nicki, this is Megan Bryce, my coworker.”

  Megan took each of their hands, pausing as she shook Hannah’s. “Oh! You’re the girl Blake gave a self-defense lesson to, huh?”

  “Yeah, I am.” Hannah shot Blake a puzzled look over Megan’s excitement.

  “Well, I’ve heard so much about you—”

  “Okay, we’ve got to get back to the table and order. I’ll see you guys next week,” Blake said. Without giving them a chance to respond, he ushered Megan away.

  “What the hell was that about?” Nicki asked.

  Hannah just watched them whisper furiously back and forth, wondering what was being said. Had Blake been talking about her?

  Hannah was beyond confused, her emotions warring. He had introduced Megan as someone he works with and been talking about Hannah to her. That alone made warmth spread through her chest. But what if it hadn’t been good? What if he’d been talking about the crazy waitress who was obsessed with him?

  Bile rose up the back of her throat at the thought of him and the pretty brunette laughing about her behind her back.

  Come on, Blake isn’t like that.

  But was she really so sure?

  “Hello, earth to Hannah. What was that little interlude about?”

  “I have no idea.”

  Chapter Fifteen

  ON TUESDAY MORNING, two weeks since Blake had saved Hannah, Blake’s feet pounded the pavement of the walking trail, classic AC/DC blaring in his ears as sweat dripped into his eyes. He was insanely frustrated, and a lot of it had to do with a certain waitress with golden-flecked eyes.

  Despite talking himself out of starting something up with her, he knew he liked her. And they’d both agreed to be friends, but when he’d walked up to Hannah at BJ’s, she hadn’t seemed happy to see him. She’d been distant and cold, and when he’d mentioned that he was going to be at the Valentine’s Day ball, too, she’d almost appeared horrified.

  What the hell did that mean? That she’d been lying about wanting to be friends? Had she been trying to avoid him? Sure, he hadn’t texted or called her or gone to Dale’s either, but that was because he was afraid of his reaction to her, not because he wanted to cut her out completely. Especially since Bryce had embarrassed the shit out of him at BJ’s last weekend. He’d been tempted to drown her in her beer when they got back to the table but had simply ignored her as he tried to catch another glimpse of Hannah.

  Being near her and smelling that insanely good fruity perfume she wore was like a shock wave to his cock. He knew deep down that the more time he spent with Hannah, the more he was going to want her and the weaker he would be. He wanted to be sure before he made a move.

  Which was why he’d decided to go to Dale’s today. Sparks was right about him knowing Hannah and how understanding she was. If he could just move past his own crap about dating, he thought that they could at least have fun together. Take things slow.

  But maybe he’d completely screwed things up be
tween them by telling her about Jenny. She might have decided that he had too much baggage to even be friends with. He wouldn’t blame her, but it still left a sour taste in his mouth.

  After a few minutes of awkwardness between Hannah, her friend, and him, he’d excused himself and gone back to his table.

  He’d looked up in time to watch Hannah and her friend leaving the restaurant, and the fact that she hadn’t even waved good-bye disturbed him. What the hell had he done to piss her off?

  He slowed to a jog as he exited the trail, and when he got to his car in the Dale’s Diner parking lot, he almost didn’t go in. He’d brought a change of clothes in case he wanted breakfast, but there was no point in going in if it was just going to make Hannah uncomfortable.

  It could also have nothing to do with me. Maybe I just caught her on a bad day?

  After another minute of deliberating with himself, he changed his shirt, grabbed his wallet, and climbed the steps to Dale’s door.

  He entered the diner, and Hannah glanced up from the coffee she was pouring, a definite frown on her face.

  Nope, it wasn’t just his imagination. He was the problem.

  “Good morning, Hannah.” He walked over to his booth and slid in without waiting for her answer.

  Not that she bothered to. Nope, she didn’t say a word, just came over with the pot of coffee and a cup.

  She set the cup in front of him with a clank and poured the coffee. “What can I get you?”

  His eyebrows rose in surprise. Now she was being downright hostile.

  “Did I do something to piss you off?” he asked.

  “Nope. Just real busy.”

  Blake turned his head to look around the empty diner. “Really?”

  “Yes, so give me your order so I can get back to it.”

  Anger pricked along Blake’s skin. “Just my usual.”

  “Fine, I’ll put that in for you.”

  She spun on her heels away from him and sashayed behind the counter, that yellow skirt twitching with a definite attitude.

  “Kenny, I’m taking a break,” she said.

  He watched as she stuck his ticket up in the window and disappeared toward the back.

  Blake’s eyes narrowed as he stood up from the table. She wanted to give him attitude with no provocation and walk away, no explanation? Fuck that.

  It was time for Hannah and him to have a talk.

  HANNAH ESCAPED OUT the back door, taking a deep, calming breath.

  Damn, why couldn’t she keep a handle on her emotions? What was it about him and his casual “Good morning, Hannah” that had set her off?

  Last night, she’d let her imagination get the best of her and, unable to sleep, had written a pretty violent fight scene for her midgrade book. She knew she was going to have to tone it down when she did her final read through, but it had been therapeutic. Okay, so she didn’t actually know if Blake had been talking about her negatively, but the way Megan had said “I’ve heard so much about you” had flown through her mind so much, she was convinced there had been a sneer to it.

  She climbed down the stairs and sat in one of the plastic chairs, cupping her face in her hands. She should go back in and apologize. Taking the imagined insult out on Blake wasn’t right, especially when there was nothing to be mad at him for. He’d tried to be a good guy and spare her feelings when he said he wasn’t ready to date. There was no proof that he was mocking her behind her back.

  Except that he’s been avoiding me like I am the crazy stalker girl he’d make fun of with his friends.

  “Hannah?”

  She groaned as she heard his voice behind her on the step. “Usually, when someone takes a break outside, away from people, it means she wants to be alone.”

  “Well, tough. ’Cause I want to know what is wrong with you.”

  Hannah heard his steps approach, and she lifted her face to look up at him. As he stood over her, she noticed his arms were crossed and his face was locked in a scowl. He wasn’t going anywhere.

  “It’s nothing. Don’t worry about it,” she said.

  “There’s something going on. You act as if you suddenly can’t stand me.”

  Just the opposite, I’m afraid.

  She sighed. “It’s not you.”

  He stared mutinously at her, and it grated on her nerves.

  “Fine.” She stood up, too, hating that he still towered over her. “You wanted to be friends, right? Well, friends don’t lie to each other.”

  “What are you talking about?” He seemed genuinely bewildered, and that really ticked her off.

  “You said you weren’t interested in me because you weren’t ready to date yet. That’s fine. Except now, I find out you’ve been talking to your coworkers about me! Were you laughing at me? It’s not as if I haven’t been rejected before, but you were discussing me like some silly girl with a crush. Plus, you’ve been avoiding me, and I don’t care if you were just trying to spare my feelings, I know you said she was just a coworker, but she is so pretty and the way she put her hand on your—”

  “Whoa, whoa, whoa! Let’s slow this down so I can get a word in here,” he said.

  Hannah, breathing hard, waved her hand. “You want a word? Have a whole sentence.”

  His mouth twitched, and Hannah decided if he had the balls to laugh at her, she was going to walk away again.

  He managed to control himself. “Thank you. Now, first of all, Megan is a pain in the ass. She’s a friend, but that is all, and I didn’t talk about you to her. Best probably told her about you, because he is a gossiping asshole.” His hand came up, and his fingers grazed the side of her face, leaving trails of heat in their wake. “But I would never hurt you, Hannah. Not on purpose, at least. As to avoiding Dale’s, it was just so I could have some time to figure out what I wanted. Believe me, I wanted to see you. I drove by here almost every morning hoping to catch a glimpse of you but was too afraid to come inside.”

  Hannah could feel the blood leave her face. She’d acted like a crazy, insecure freak, and there was no reason for it. God, why couldn’t she just stuff her emotions down like a normal person?

  Sheepishly, she tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear and stared down at her feet. “So, yeah . . . I’m crazy, don’t mind me.”

  She tried to make a joke, but it fell flat, especially when she could feel his eyes on her. She looked up finally to find him staring at her in the weirdest way. It wasn’t scared, and he hadn’t taken off running to get a restraining order, so . . . was that a good thing?

  “You were jealous.” His statement jerked her gaze up to his, and she could have sworn he’d looked pleased. Excited, even.

  There was no use denying that she’d been jealous. She’d acted like an insane stalker.

  “Yes, I was.”

  Did he step closer? His hand caught her under the chin, and he tilted her face up. “You know you could have asked me instead of being passive-aggressive.”

  Now she was flushed with embarrassment. “I really didn’t think it was any of my business, and I was trying really, really hard not to let it bother me, but I . . . I like you, Blake. I can’t help it.”

  What the hell was wrong with her? In a million years, she’d never thought she’d be spilling her guts in the back of Dale’s Diner, especially not to Blake.

  For a second, his thumb smoothed across her lower lip, and she thought he was going to kiss her. Her breath caught in her chest as she waited, longing to feel the press of his mouth on hers, the caress of his fingers against her skin.

  But he stopped, dropping his hand from her, and it fell back to his side.

  “I like you, Hannah. I do. I just needed some time and space to think, and I didn’t want to hurt you in the process.” His hazel eyes bored into hers, and she was frozen to the spot, unable to escape. “Which is the last thing I want to do. Believe me, I want you more than I can put into words. I just need more time to sort through what that means.”

  Hannah’s heart hammered at hi
s words. He wanted her? Like really wanted her?

  He pulled his wallet out of his pocket and held out a twenty-dollar bill. “This is for breakfast. I’m not really hungry anymore.”

  Hannah took it, unsure of what else to say. She didn’t even turn around as he walked away; what was the point? He’d been perfectly clear about how he felt, and she had her answer. He liked her.

  Just not enough.

  BLAKE CURSED A blue streak as he got onto the freeway and hit bumper-to-bumper traffic. The last thing he wanted was be stuck in a car, with only himself for company. Everything he’d said to Hannah had been the truth . . .

  But he’d also been lying.

  He more than liked her. He wanted her. She’d woken him up and made him realize that he was still alive. That he could still feel, but he wasn’t sure how much. And Hannah deserved someone who could give her all of himself.

  Sometimes he felt as though his soul had been buried with Jenny.

  Blake closed his eyes, trying to remember Jenny’s laughter, but the sound had faded over time to just a faint echo. He could still see her smile, her bright blue eyes, and the delight on her face the morning she’d told him she was pregnant.

  Just a week before the shooting.

  If the ache of losing the love of his life hadn’t been enough, the fact that she had died carrying his child had been brutal. He’d spent the better part of eight months with his face in a bottle at home, and when he was at work, he was getting in trouble for being hungover. His temper was short, he’d alienated most of his friends, and if he was being completely honest, he hadn’t even liked himself then.

  He’d eventually ended up in the base drunk tank after starting a fight, and his CO, Captain Marshal, had come to see him. He’d been the one to suggest he transfer somewhere else, that he would handle everything, including therapy to help Blake move past it. At first he’d resisted, not wanting to leave everything that reminded him of Jenny, but then he’d taken a hard look at himself in the mirror. At the bloodshot eyes and sallow skin. He was no longer the man Jenny had loved, and he hated himself for failing her again.

  So he’d let his CO organize his transfer to California, and his first day in group therapy, he’d met Best, Sparks, and Martinez. They’d bonded over their reluctance to talk in front of the others and struck up a friendship that felt more like family. It had been an amazing feeling, one he’d never shared with any of his other friends or even the members of his squad.