Twilight Siege: A Dark Fantasy Novel (The Fae Games Book 2)
Page 15
“You do realize that I know you’re there,” he said in an amused tone as he turned to meet my eyes.
I was so mesmerized that I didn’t immediately slam the door shut, which is what I would have done had I been in control of all my faculties. Instead, my lips parted and I stood transfixed like a child in awe of the tricks of a magician.
He immediately zeroed in on my lust-filled daze and froze. In a heartbeat’s time he was across the room and pushing the door open to pull me inside. His hands came around my head and pulled my lips to his. They were warm and soft and inviting—everything I remembered from the last time we’d kissed. Aside from my sex dream, it had been months since we had shared that ravenous kiss in my apartment, but every detail was seared in my brain.
One of his hands found my lower back and pulled me against his firm body while my hands were busy roving over the muscled planes of his chest. My head tipped to the side and he kissed down the column of my neck sending goose bumps down my arms. His hands found the bottom of my shirt and lifted it smoothly over my head before his strong hands kneaded at my bare skin at my sides, his mouth finding mine again. Neither of us could get enough, we were adrift in sensation and desire.
When his hands fumbled at my bra clasp a tiny voice penetrated my trance reminding me that I wasn’t the unique recipient of Lochlan’s attention. I gasped and pulled back, crossing my arms over my exposed chest.
“I’m sorry, I don’t know what I was thinking,” I blurted as I rushed toward the door.
“Goddammit, you’re running again?” he ground out.
I stopped immediately at his angry tone and slowly turned. “I don’t want to just screw around with someone for fun, I’m sorry to disappoint. I’m sure you have plenty of other options so you don’t have to be pissy at me.”
“I don’t want other options, I want you.” His intense blue eyes bore straight into my soul and it made me want to hide from his scrutiny.
“Is that what you tell the others too? I’ve seen you, Lochlan. I know how you mess around and I’m not like that. I can’t just have casual sex with you and not be bothered when I see you with other women. It was one thing when I hardly knew you, but not now.” I sounded defeated to my own ears and I hoped that he didn’t make this any harder than it already was.
He took a step closer, eyes narrowing. “You finally ready to talk about that?”
“There’s nothing to talk about—you had your tongue down her throat the same day you kissed me. I didn’t mean to make a big deal about this, just forget I said anything.”
“I tried time after time to explain but you wouldn’t give me the time of day. Now that we’re stuck out here together and you can’t walk away from me, you’re going to listen to me whether you want to or not.” He slowly approached with an intense expression in his eyes that made my heart rate kick up another notch. When we were toe-to-toe his hands came up to gently hold my face. “Becca, we’ve talked about how the Fae feed their magic in various ways—like how the Shadow Fae feed off fear. The Seelie and some Unseelie feed from sexual energy. That’s how we all feed our magic, it’s not necessarily a choice. We talked about his.”
I was stunned into silence as I vaguely recalled the conversation. “That was back before I knew hardly anything. Plus, you just said that some Fae feed from sexual energy, you never said you were one of them. I haven’t had to feed my magic, how was I supposed to know you did?”
“I don’t know. I’m not used to explaining myself—feeding isn’t exactly comparable to grabbing dinner, but it’s just a part of everyday life for us. Is that why you’ve kept a wall between us these last months?”
I didn’t answer his question, I was still processing what I had learned, trying to decide how it made me feel. “How often?”
“It depends on how much magic I’m using and whether I’m on Earth or in Faery. Before you showed up and life was relatively simple, I required little—every two to four weeks.”
A part of me was relieved that he had a reason for fooling around with the woman. On the other hand, knowing he would have to go find sex every time he needed to fuel up made me nauseous. That meant that over the past months, he had been ‘feeding’ from someone probably twice a month, at least. A range of emotions battled for dominance and I clenched my fists to keep from lashing out and wailing on an inanimate object. As much as I wanted to hide from the painful subject, I was also compelled to learn more.
“How does it work?”
“It’s about feeding off the sexual energy released by a partner when they climax—it doesn’t necessarily require intercourse.”
My head turned to the side, eyes feeling suspiciously watery. I hated thinking about him with other women but I didn’t think I could volunteer to be his energy source. My options were abysmal and it made me insanely frustrated.
“You have to know by now that I’d prefer it was you.” His hands gently brought my face back toward him and I could see the sincerity in his eyes.
“I don’t know what to say, Lochlan. Obviously I’m drawn to you but this is all so overwhelming. I don’t know how to trust someone who might need to have sex with someone else to fuel up and I can’t just be intimate with you without that trust.”
“But you did it once before, didn’t you? When Ronan made you think he was me. You were willing to trust me then.” His features were unapologetic and I could feel the blood drain from my face. How could he throw that in my face?
A single tear escaped down my cheek and I turned and fled to my room where I locked the door and took several deep breaths to calm myself. He called after me, telling me to wait but I was done, I couldn’t take any more that night.
I had left my shirt in his room so I pulled one out of my bag and curled up in bed. Why had Lochlan lashed out at me? Had he said that just to hurt me? Whatever his reasoning, it had worked.
Even if I saw past his hurtful words, I didn’t see how I could be with him. I wasn’t from this Fae world where sex was as commonplace as going for a morning run. How would you know if a partner was cheating or merely amping up their power stores? I couldn’t just jump into a relationship like that. And yes, I had slept with him once but the result of that slip was exactly why I wouldn’t go down that road again. I needed trust and that wasn’t going to come easily after all I had experienced since moving to Belfast.
I remembered hearing that the Fae sometimes used sex to feed their magic, but it hadn’t occurred to me that Lochlan and the others fell into that category. Did that mean Ashley would face the same situation? She had defended Lochlan, suggesting I ask him about what I had seen. A heavy sense of foreboding came over me. Oh shit. No wonder she was having such a hard time with her transition. I was the biggest sort of fool and a terrible friend. I hadn’t faced that issue personally and with so many other problems requiring my attention, that facet of Fae life had not entered my mind.
Why hadn’t she mentioned her need to feed? For that matter, why didn’t I need to feed like that? Because I wasn’t fully Fae yet? Or was it because I had a mix of powers? Would I need to feed eventually and if so, what would I feed from? The rapid-fire questions and raging emotions had sapped the little energy I had left from our trip to Faery. I buried myself under the covers and did my best to turn off my weary brain.
An hour or so before dinner a woman came to help me get cleaned up. On my prior visit I had befriended the woman who had helped me prepare for dinner with the queen. Her name had been Cyrene and despite my hopes that she would be the one to attend to me again, it had not been her who came knocking at the door. I was not interested in conversation, and the woman was not overly chatty so our time together was quiet. My hair style was not as intricate as when Cyrene had done it, but it was still elegant and I felt lovely in the ivory gown I had been given.
When the bell tolled, I stepped out of my room to find a brooding Lochlan standing in the hall. His eyes devoured me hungrily as he stalked toward me and butterflies stirred in my belly.
My gaze offered him a glimpse into my fears and hesitations; his demanded a chance to assuage those fears. With the hope that I was reading him correctly, I gave a single nod and he lifted his chin in response. With my arm in his, he escorted me to the dining room.
Dinner at Court was a production that was performed each evening and the actors had perfected their roles with years of practice. The scene unfolded exactly as it had the first time I had dined with the queen and I could only imagine how tedious it would be to go through the motions nightly. Not that the courtiers seemed bothered by the affair, in fact, they all chatted animatedly, alight with nightly gossip and intrigue.
The table was large enough to seat a small village, and it was adorned down the center with fresh flower arrangements and gleaming candelabras. Each straight-back chair had intricately detailed woodwork and red velour cushions, matching the floor-to-ceiling draperies. Upon the entrance and exit of the queen, the crowd ceased conversing to rise to their feet, and throughout the meal the servers were vigilant and precise—not a drop was spilled nor a glass left empty.
Lochlan sat between me and the queen and managed to field all of her questions. Conversation remained on superficial topics ranging from a new theater production being performed at the palace to a recent bountiful harvest of misha fruit, whatever that was. Matters of politics were not discussed at the table, and the rule was strictly enforced. After the meal concluded, the ladies separated to a drawing room for tea and the men to a parlor for after dinner drinks. I was not thrilled to leave Lochlan but had little choice.
Guin summoned me to sit with her on a royal blue velvet tufted settee and I reluctantly obliged. Women clustered throughout the room, sipping from drinks and absorbed in discussions. The scene was straight out of a Jane Austen novel, something I had always loved but never dreamed I would experience in person.
I wondered how different everyday life was outside the palace. Our journey through the city showed a relatively simple lifestyle, not nearly as grandiose as palace life, but not as harsh as Europe would have been during the 1800s. There was no filth in the streets and the people had appeared relatively clean and healthy. With that all being said, as curious as I was about Avalon, I had no desire to live there or in any other Faery city for that matter.
“Has Lochlan told you where you will be traveling?” Guin asked in a tone that was surprisingly quiet, her eyes roaming the crowd. I was worried about saying the wrong thing and unlike at dinner, Lochlan would not be available to answer on my behalf.
“Not exactly, just that we’re going to the Shadow Lands,” I replied cautiously.
“And you know that not even the Unseelie dare to venture into those lands? Your encounter with the Draug will look like child’s play should you encounter a Fachan or a band of Sluagh, not to mention a host of other possibilities, each more terrifying than the last.” Those calculating green eyes turned to me and my muscles tensed in wariness.
“I know very little about what I’m walking into but I also know that I have no choice.”
“Ah, so easy to be brave when bolstered by ignorance. There are always choices,” she cooed with a smirk.
“I suppose you’re right, I could choose to ignore the threat.” I knew that I may be pushing my luck by making the jab, but her patronizing manner raised my hackles.
“In that scenario, you have already chosen to accept that there is a threat.”
“Yes,” I said with a confident lift of my chin. “Because there is a threat and I will eliminate that threat for you. The only thing I ask in return is that you allow me to remain on Earth.”
Her head tipped back and she laughed heartily, the chatter in the room quieting as the ladies curiously gazed in our direction. Abruptly her laughter stopped and her eyes narrowed on me. “You seem to suffer from the delusion that you are doing me a favor. There is no war and you have no leverage over me. My decree states that all Fae must live on Faery, save only for the members of the Hunt, and there are no exceptions. The only reason I have allowed you to stay on Earth is my desire to be civil with Merlin. The moment he is done with you, I expect your obedience.”
Adrenaline induced panic raced through my body making my hands sweat and my heart pound against my ribcage. She wasn’t going to let me stay on Earth. My parents, everything I’d ever known, would have to be left behind. I had been certain she would make an exception for me since I was originally from Earth, but she had zero intention of letting me stay.
As frustration, anger, and a swell of emotions boiled up inside me, I quickly rose to my feet. At the same time the air gusted and blew out all the candles sending the room into darkness, startling me into stillness. The queen didn’t move, her eyes still glued to me unwaveringly, but the other ladies fumbled around in the dark. Guin slowly lifted her hand and a ball of light began to glow from her palm as she watched me curiously like I was some kind of circus attraction.
Overwhelmed and feeling out of control, I hurried from the room and raced up the curving staircase. As I hurried down the long hallway toward my room, someone called out my name in warning.
When I spun around, a Fae man stood several steps behind me with a knife in his hand. The man snarled, back curved and knees bent, ready to attack. He wore servant’s clothing but they could have been worn merely to infiltrate the castle. I had no clue how dangerous he could be so I went on full alert.
Some distance behind him stood Cyrene, hands covering her mouth in fright. The moment my eyes were drawn to her, the would-be assassin lunged, jabbing the knife at me and Cyrene cried out.
I employed the techniques I had been learning for months and circled him in a defensive stance, which was made much more difficult by my gown and heals. Sweat beaded on his forehead and his jaw was clenched in desperate urgency. This time he swung at me with his fist before swiping with the knife in his other hand—I was able to block the punch and grab the wrist of his hand holding the blade.
With grunts and the distinct ripping of my dress, we grappled for control of the weapon. Out of the corner of my eye, Cyrene approached holding a vase and brought it down on the man’s head. Unfortunately, her kindhearted nature meant she didn’t hit hard enough to knock him out. Instead, he roared in fury and with a quick swipe he plunged the knife into her stomach.
A guttural cry tore from my chest and I whipped my leg out in a round-house kick to his head. Taking advantage of his disoriented spin, I grabbed his fist holding the knife and plunged the blade into his neck. He stilled in shock, his own hand still holding the knife protruding from his neck. Blood oozed from the wound and spilled down from his parted lips before his eyes glazed over and he dropped to his knees, falling face-down on the intricate hall rug.
I tore my gaze from the gruesome scene and raced over to Cyrene where she sat on the floor gasping for air. The wound was low in her belly and I had no idea how severe such a stab wound was for a Fae.
“Cyrene, you stay there, I’m going to get help.” I assured her before racing back toward the stairs.
From the top step I could see Lochlan casually taking the first steps up from the lower level. His eyes flew up to where I stood and once he saw the blood on my white gown he traced in next to me.
“What’s happened? Are you all right?” he growled at me while his hands and eyes searched for injuries.
“I’m fine, but someone tried to kill me and my friend, Cyrene. She was injured and needs help.” I took hold of his hand and raced back to where she sat. After Lochlan quickly assessed her, he disappeared, returning seconds later with a host of other men and several of the queen’s Valkyrie guards.
Some of the men gently lifted Cyrene and carried her to the stairs as I looked on nervously.
“She’s going to be fine, they’re taking her to be cared for—a wound like that is not deadly.” His eyes turned to the man
bleeding out on the ground.
The Valkyrie soldiers placed iron cuffs on his hands and lifted him unceremoniously before dragging him off as well. One of the women stayed to question me about what had happened and then Lochlan and I were left alone in the dimly lit hallway.
I was still stunned over the attack and my brain struggled to catch up. Someone tried to kill me. I had fought him off and in defending myself, I had stabbed him in the neck. I had killed a man, at least he would have been dead had he been human. Cyrene had tried to help me and gotten herself stabbed. I hated that she had been injured trying to protect me, but I was so relieved that she would survive.
“Let’s get you cleaned up.” Lochlan took my hand and I let him lead me to my room.
Once we were inside with the door closed, he turned me around and with agile fingers unbuttoned the back of my sullied gown. When he finished, he magically filled the tub with warm water, something I hadn’t realized he could do, but I didn’t have the energy to comment on my revelation.
Lochlan had seen me naked before and I was too mentally ravaged to be concerned with modesty so I dropped the gown and my panties to the floor and sunk into the warm bath. The water worked miracles on my tense muscles and helped me come down gently from my adrenaline high.
I was pleased that I had managed to put my training to use in a life-or-death situation and that I hadn’t slipped into a state of shock after the fact. I would never have wished that situation upon myself, but knowing my training was paying off was an enormous relief.
Lochlan seated himself in one of the wing-back chairs not far from the tub. “I’d like to hear what happened,” he said softly.
I noted that his normal commanding tone was absent. There was no telling if it was out of consideration of my fragile state or if he was genuinely interested in making an effort to earn my trust. Being respectful sure would go a long way but I wasn’t going to get my hopes up.
Giving as much detail as I could, I walked him through the attack. It had only lasted a matter of minutes and no words had been exchanged, so I had little information to share.